has there been a situation in which you took something too personally how do you avoid taking things personally so the initial reaction is like no man don’t take things too personally you know what keeps you but the actual fact is yeah I take things I take everything personally right like I mean I if I do something bad I am very personally I don’t like it at all if I do something poorly I don’t like it at all I take it very personal if somebody gives me feedback I take it personally this is like it’s an ego thing it’s a pure ego thing right and I just had to say this at a group us talking to just because I say ego is bad all the time he goes good – mmm egos what drives you ego is what makes you want to be number one ego is what is brings you pride in your work it makes you work harder to give deliver good product and and be a good leader and a good employee and a good person right that’s ego the problem comes when ego or taking things personally actually prevents you from listening to the critiques that you’re being told that’s that’s the problem so for instance we’ll take this little podcast right here it’s got some critique on it the other day yeah I got somebody somebody sent me a little critique and they said that I didn’t explain because we had Andy slump phone here and Andy was kind of rattling off that is his career in the teams and he was rattling off the career in the teams he lost some people not a bunch because it wasn’t that complicated but he lost some people and in for instance he used an acronym or an acronym LPL which stands for leading petty officer which is the which is the second senior enlisted person in a seal platoon and I didn’t explain that when he said it so there’s an example so when I heard this my first reaction is like oh you don’t know what LPO is called go google go google it why are you asking me Oh Bryce just stop talking and then that was pretty much you know my my ego was saying hey I can’t believe this person – yeah how dare you how dare you and then I as I thought about was like well you know I need to be I need to make sure in the future that I’m more that I’m more aware of what guys are talking especially when I’m sitting here talking to it another seal who we have a common language and we are talking about things in very conversational mode so we’re not caring about anybody else and that’s sort of what the podcast is often is like we’re not we’re not talking to everyone that’s listening at this moment we’re just kind of talking to ourselves or amongst ourselves and so when he throws out this words I need to be more aware of them so if I took it personally I might not listen if I actually listen I can do a better job so that’s that’s kind of it you’ve been basically that’s the same with anybody when anybody receives any criticism of any kind hmm they get they take it personally and I think the thing is two things number one get over it so you can listen to what the criticism is in and also remember this this is kind of weird I I think maybe I’m wrong what do you think the more angry and the more personally you take some criticism the truer it actually is is that possible when something really bothers you it’s probably something that really bothers you because you know it’s true yeah like when somebody says something that just doesn’t matter to me it’s you know I don’t take it personally oh yeah they just think that don’t worry about it I’m not worried about it but when somebody says something that I know is true and they’re pingy me that means I get even more take it more personally and get more angry about it and and then that should be an indicator hey this is something you actually need to fix yeah it actually has to do with insecurity more than anything so aqumarine it can be super true or it can be kinda true or you can just be questioning and whether or not it’s true if you’re insecure about it that’s when it’s gonna because you can be like there can be okay you know let’s say guys have a receding hairline and they’re like oh I don’t I don’t care about that at all it’s totally true you know and or let’s say I do care about it I don’t like it but I’ve known it for the last time I’m not 20 years whatever and so I was like hey you know your hairlines receding care about that I don’t I don’t think you know I don’t know just saying there are certain things that’s and if you know about it or you know and you know it’s true and see you won’t necessarily be bothered by it but if you get someone who’s like it’s starting to recede or it’s early on or it’s like gang and they won’t necessarily be this is just an example hypothetical but they won’t necessarily be concerned about the actual hairline receding they’re more concerned about oh do I look older and my unattractive now or am I losing it now or something like that that’s what they’re insecure about so when someone points out some symptom of that insecurity that’s when they’re like well you go to say that or you know they get on oh man that goes for kind of anything so maybe I don’t know maybe it’s someone saying hey you didn’t explain this enough maybe you’re like wait what do you say was that a junk episode kind of thing or something like did I not you know how you you’re good at explaining stuff and simplifying them whatever maybe it was like a maybe a personal point of pride yeah yeah yeah but maybe but that’s typically what people get mad about it’s not necessarily if they know it’s true or not it’s if they’re insecure about it right well you wouldn’t be insecure about something that wasn’t true nobody here’s the thing sometimes you do because you know and you know sometimes it’s like a weird like mental like problem but you know girls for example I’m not saying all girls but I’m gonna totally generalize right now but you know the girl is like hey do I look fat in this the girls like an awesome shape or whatever and you’re like they always think they’re fat it’s not true that’s not the right response by the way you know it’s like that kind of stuff you know people are just insecure about stuff sometimes oh and even though the girls in really good shape yeah yeah even guys when especially like if they’re into like their physique or something like that where I don’t know they’re at a party or so I’ve heard guys like they go to parties and they’ll do like dips or push-ups before they walk in it’s like so they’re like more pumped I swear and is that why you’re doing some pushing like yeah you’re just a little insecure about what I said anyway you know they’ll get that kind where they’ll be like oh I’m they’ll think that I’m not looking very cut up or something yeah yeah you know like that can stuff well they’re not true yeah yeah no I think I think that’s a good point and I think the bottom line is when we take things personally I think it’s actually not a negative thing because it means that you’re there’s probably something that you need to work on but I think what we need to watch out for is taking it personally and therefore being mad and either being mad at the person that told you which the person probably could be out of line you know saying some stuff that’s offensive but even if someone offends you okay well let’s fix it so you don’t have that that that weakness or that insecurity anymore and so just know what your red flags are know when you’re taking something everybody takes stuff personally yeah I’m like mister detachment and I take some personal time when somebody says something to me I’m like okay hey why’d I go how do you do better yeah you do a good job with seeing the big picture though you know like but because a lot times you know when I always think back to the you know the relationship like okay let’s say let’s say I’m at home I’m mowing the lawn I you know did all this these great housework chores whatever it you know dad comes home mom comes home and they’re like hey I thought I told you to take out the trash meanwhile everything else is spic and span so I’m like I’m mad you know how dare you say that to me when I did this me me my thing my thing but at the same time they’re right you know so you do a good job of like you’d be able to kind of recognize that even though you probably feel the same readiness you won’t your default isn’t who do sit and fight back in it and make the problem bigger it’s kind of like you’ll feel it on the inside and recognize the red flags what’s happening oh yeah oh cool but I don’t remember take out the chest because the truth is that’s correct right as you do doesn’t matter if you did the lawn or not the trash was a thing you know
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