Jocko Podcast 177 w/ Echo Charles: What To Do When You Fail. Q & A.

this is Jocko podcast number 177 with echo Charles and me Jocko Willick good evening echo good evening a few days later when I walked downstairs to go work out I saw uncle Jake’s bag packed up sitting by the door that’s when it hit me the summer was almost over and Uncle Jake was leaving again I went out to the garage to work out and Uncle Jake was already there last workout with me for the summer he said with a smile I can’t believe it’s over already summer always goes by so fast I told him yes it does uncle Jake said quietly and life does the same thing I wasn’t sure what Uncle Jake meant by that so I asked what you’ll see mark he said life goes by quickly like a summer day it never seems that way when you’re young but when you get a little older you’ll see life goes by fast so don’t waste any time you don’t get a second chance Uncle Jake stood for a minute looking at me with a serious face then he gave me a little smile and said speaking of wasting time let’s stop wasting time and get this workout done he jumped up on the pull-up bar grabbed hold and started knocking them out and that is a little excerpt from the last chapter in a new book the latest edition in the series way the warrior could kid book 3 the subtitle the book is where there is a will and I wrote that part of the book because I wanted to let kids know as early as possible that that is the truth that life goes by like a summer day and the life is short and if you remember when you were a kid and summer you get out of school for the summer and it seems like you have all the time in the world it seems like summer vacation is gonna last forever and then all of a sudden that’s blurred and you look up and as soon as summer vacation has started all of a sudden it’s over that’s what I remember about summers and that’s the truth and that’s what life is like about a year and a half ago September 29th the 2017 and September 29th is st Michael’s Day that’s the day that Mikey Mansour was killed in Ramadi in 2006 so on September 29th 2017 I woke up and I was thinking about that and I was thinking about Mikey and later that day I think I was actually heading up to Rosecrans National Cemetery where Mikey is buried and I was gonna go and visit Mikey’s grave and while I was on my way up there I got a call and I found out that one of my mentors one of the guys that raised me in the SEAL Teams a guy named Master Chief Mike faculty he had died and he had been in a pretty hardcore battle with lung cancer even though he was a nonsmoker even though he’s a triathlete even though he worked out all the time he got this form of lung cancer and originally the doctors told him he was gonna live for six months but that was in I think 2012 he had retired in 2001 and I sitting there thinking about faculty and actually btf Tony talked about him called him FAC when he was on the podcast because we all called him FAC but I remembered just a bunch of different things about FAQ and one of the things that I remembered was I had come back from my third deployment so this is in the 90s back in the day and I had done my third deployment and I had been moved into the training department at SEAL team 1 so instead of doing a workup and going on deployment the way the teams used to be set up you would you would go into training cell and the team trained itself the training department at SEAL team 1 trained to the platoons at SEAL team 1 later it became that we had a big centralized Training Command that’s what I ran before I got out before I retired I ran that the trade at on the west coast but it used to be each team had their own training cell and that’s how you would train platoons to get ready for their deployments and of course nobody really wanted to be in training cell because it meant you couldn’t go on deployment and that’s why you joined the SEAL team assist to go on deployment and for whatever reason we in a bunch of us from my platoon that I’d gone through buds with a bunch of guys we’d all done three platoons that kind of we all kind of got thrown into training cell at the same time and we’d been in there for a couple days I mean maybe less than a week we come back from deployment we’d get put into training cell and I kind of forget what happened but a couple guys that were getting ready to deploy got hurt in fact it might have been guys had gotten hurt as soon as they got over there maybe they didn’t go on deployment the guys that went and replaced us all of a sudden they needed a couple guys and that quarters in the morning that’s when you at SEAL team one they used to have quarters in the morning where you all just stand up and line up sort of like your typical military formation everyone would kind of line up and by platoon and the platoons would all report in that was an old-school team one deal right there and then if there was any important announcements to make then the announcements would get made and then everyone would go about their day well the announcement that got made that morning was hey we need two guys to go on two is there anyone here that feels like going on deployment or can go on deployment and and of course it’s a big deal right to just pick up and go and leave for six months and it was actually my roommate at the time who had been my roommate who I went through buds with and who I did three platoons with and went through SEAL tactical training with with him and we were actually roommates that entire time so we were on people work tight you my brother and when they asked this question of hey is there anybody here that can go on deployment like tomorrow or the next day and basically out of the whole team it was him and me we raised our hand said yeah hey we’ll go because at that time you know we were just single team guys we didn’t have anything else we literally had nothing else you could put our whole world into two crews boxes and we could ship anywhere in the world we didn’t care we had no attachments we had didn’t care about anything so of course we raised her hands and as soon as her hands went up Master Chief faculty gave us a glare because he was the guy that was in charge of training cell so he gave us a glare and corners ended and he cuz he said hey what you guys come upstairs and talk to me real quick and I was thinking okay we must have done something wrong and you sometimes you didn’t know what you did wrong but I me and my buddy we figured we’d done something wrong so we went up there and actually actually now that I think about it we he brought us into the Chiefs mess and we were like ephors or e5s at the time and so goal getting pulled into the Chiefs Chiefs mess I’d never been in there before and I was like scared thinking what did I thought I did something wrong I thought that I left a trail of some crime I’d committed and now we’re getting busted and we get up there and basically he reamed us out and he says listen you guys need to be in training so and he was making great points I didn’t recognize that time you know as it looks if you want to be professionals if this is where you’re gonna learn a lot we need good guys to be teaching the rest of the platoons that’s why you’re in here you’re not going on deployment shut up and I’m pulling your names out of the Hat and they’ll find two other people that can go we’ll send some new guys over there doesn’t matter so that’s what it was that was this little story it was big funny because you know we were it was just funny from multiple reasons when I thought back about just the fact that you’re in a point in your life I think I was probably like 23 or 24 years old and just just think about right now if someone says hey can you just leave for six months tomorrow mmm I mean there’s not too many people that could just pull up and do that so there’s that there’s the fact that you know faculty was bringing us into the Chiefs mess and we were all nervous about that and then the fact that you know faculty what he was actually doing was trying to look out for us and trying to look out for our careers and trying to look out for the SEAL team he was trying to do the right thing and it was one of those one of those little stories and there’s just all these little stories like that that make up that whole era of my life the whole time as a young enlisted guide SEAL team on its this whole bunch of memories and when he died I got this feeling that those memories those those days are over like they’re gone because at least partially because when FAC was around like a part of those memories are facts memories like only he could tell us what he was thinking at that time and when he dies when he died then didn’t those memories are gone and look I can’t ask him about him I can’t go and have a beer with him and talk about that time and hear his side of it like no there they’re not here they’re gone and as I was you know again going up to see Mikey Mansour at Rosecrans and I continued to think about that and thinking about the memories that might be had and how those are going but I didn’t have too much time to dig into those thoughts because the next morning September 30th 2017 that’s when I got word that the Delta platoon commander my brother Seth stone had died as well and all kinds of memories died with him I mean I got my half of him about it’s half it’s incomplete conversations and jokes and guitar jams and then on top of those I get little but Seth was incredibly smart and he’d give me little ideas little thoughts but only the beginning of because there’s millions of things to talk about you think you got your whole life to to consider those things but you don’t and I get that we can try and talk about them we can try and write them down and we can do everything you know our power to to try and hang on to those things but the fact of the matter is you you can’t you can’t preserve them in their true form it’s just gone and as I thought about that and as I continue to think about that and try and figure out what can we do if we can’t preserve these memories then what can we do I mean I think the best thing that we can do is try and make more try and make more make more memories so so keep in mind what Uncle Jake said life goes by like a summer day so you better take advantage of it when your best to make yourself some memories along the way and with that echo yes it’s been a little while since we did some Q&A yes sir what do you got I’ve got some questions from the interwebs all right we’ll go into it first question what do you do when the boss always says we can’t but doesn’t offer logical and reasonable alternatives to make positive forward changes should one just do what they think is best and not listen to the boss okay first of all what we want to do is we want to support the boss I’m gonna build a relationship with the boss what’s the best way to support the boss for the best way to build a relationship is to be a performer be a performer inside the box right that the boss has said you can’t do this you can’t do that cool we’re gonna do the best we can in side the box and once you do that once you once you actually once you actually are a performer then you have leverage then you can actually talk about a different way of doing things you can bring up a legitimate idea to the boss and they may will they have a better chance of listening to you so that’s what you got to do you got to play the game a little bit you got to you got to become a performer you got to do what it is the way they want it done to the best of your ability be successful with it and then once you’ve built up some clout and some relationship and maybe a little political capital then you can present a new idea and when you present the new idea have the facts lined up don’t go in there half-cocked and present your idea and hopefully gets cleared now that’s what that’s section a section B is do you gotta make things happen sometimes you and depending on how like it’s that whole thing of it’s better to beg forgiveness than ask for permission that’s a that’s a it’s it’s it’s a it’s a tool it’s definitely a tool if you abuse it you’re gonna get crushed if it’s one of those things where the the boss has told you not to do something and you decide well I’m gonna do it anyways and I’ll just beg for forgiveness no they actually told you not to do it that’s not where you’re supposed to use that tool yeah that’s just that’s just that’s just unset right under that if it’s something where well I kind of suspect that the boss might not want it this way but you know what chances are it’s gonna go in my direction and chances are it’s gonna be beneficial and chances are the boss might not even find out and if the boss does find out this isn’t something that they’ve ever declared hostile so you’ll be okay in that situation too to beg for forgiveness but don’t abuse that tool and then what you do is you start if when you’re inside the hey I’m gonna beg for forgiveness then you can start actually doing something in developing a standard operating procedure that makes sense and then once you get it solidified you go to the boss and say hey boss we’ve been doing this a different way I want to let you know I want to show you what we’ve been doing because we you know you know boss we never really had a specific way of getting this done and I know some other people did it like this and some people did it like that we came up with a methodology actually wrote the whole thing out for you so you can see exactly what we’re doing boom who’s gonna say no to that plus it’s been successful 80 times boom we’re good so so that’s what you want to do that’s pretty pretty straight forward don’t don’t just straight disobey the boss unless the boss is telling you to do something’s gonna get someone killed or illegal or whatever mm-hm but if they’re just have a different idea or something just go with it execute it become a good performer and then once you have that relationship built you’ll have all kinds of influence over your boss always had crazy influence over my bosses yeah I don’t wanna sound I don’t say in an arrogant way I wasn’t like I was manipulating my bosses but my boss is like I was honest with my bosses and they I did good work and so when I said hey boss are we sure we should do it this way they’d be like what do you think well here’s what I think we’d get shit done so pretty straightforward pretty straightforward yeah that asking for forgivness thing risky move he’s not a risky move it sometimes it’s a great great move yeah if you kind of like how you said like don’t abuse it where you know there’s levels to it yeah where there’s like little things Larry to levels so like if you if there’s one that’s like how you said like he told you not only and this goes for like anyone like your anyone you’re dealing with like your even your friends kind of thing you know where are they if you know for a fact that they don’t want you to do it so that’s why you prefer not to ask for permission because you know they’re gonna say no but you know like right you shouldn’t do that you know that yeah but if it’s the kind where it’s like I can see why he’d want to do it maybe this way or maybe not even necessarily want to do that this way because maybe he doesn’t see the benefits that we see right now but and he’s closed-minded he’s you know he has that reputation so let’s let’s sort of do it how you said successfully you know kind of thing so and then that’s on the other side of the spectrum you know but some people men they’ll just like take it to level five or whatever and be like oh yeah they’re gonna hate this boss better dose for forgiveness or producing that’s a guarantee no and forgiveness at least I think of but Bry you’re gonna damage the relationship if you do that and stuff then you’re gonna get tightened down on yeah yeah oh yeah man it’s true don’t don’t let that happen next question I’m the youngest leader in my firm’s history I try and implement extreme ownership and default aggressiveness in my team being so young some of my elder subordinates sometimes dismiss my directives how do I leave this effectively okay so I actually hate when I get this question or questions like this because it means that I’ve screwed up that’s sort of he’s I don’t like to screw up but when I see a question like this it means that somebody has misinterpreted the message a little bit they haven’t read the dichotomy leadership for sure and in my opinion because if you read the dichotomy leadership you’ll see that extreme ownership and default aggressive are supposed to be balanced mm-hmm and so that’s what’s going on here you got someone that’s like you know what I’m going to take extreme ownership hey we’re doing this my way this the boss I’m a leader and that’s just horrible and everyone hates you so bro you’re young they don’t hate you because you’re young they’re not mad at you because you’re an experienced they don’t dismiss you because because you are a decade younger than that’s not why it’s happening it’s happening because you are lacking humility you haven’t built up any relationship with these people you haven’t built up any leadership capital with them you haven’t asked them how they think they should do things you haven’t asked them what they’ve been doing for the last 22 years while you were gonna middle school right so come in be humble them the best way to gain respect from people this is what’s hard to do this what’s hard to understand you want people to respect you ask them a question listen to what they have to say mm-hm listen to their opinion if they come up with a good plan use their plan the worst way to gain respect from people is to go in and demand respect from people is to go in and say I’m implementing default to krispy not heard of that you never read extreme ownership have you I’ll tell you what that’s the way we’re dealing it here I’ll get you a copy so you can read up and get on board with my program these are all bad so I’m not trying to say you sound just like that but you might sound something like that and you don’t need to be too far off that so appreciate that you’re getting after it but what you need to get after more is some balance be humble listen to the team listen to what they have to say ask for their input follow very important that’s a little black belt move it’s a little black belt it’s actually a blue belt move but blue belt purple belt move like hey my team gives me input I listen to them mmm we actually you know hey echo how do you think which I think we should attack this target from the north okay sounds good why don’t we roll with that that’s a Bluebell move man what’s it what’s a white belt move negative no the white belt moves like hey echo we’re doing this we’re attacking his target from the south I’m gonna questions and you’re like well I think I could did from the north might be a little bit better that might be what you think but that’s not what we’re doing plus I’m in charge because I got ownership of this whole thing I’m default aggressive so do what I said so don’t be that guy man try and back off a little bit try and form as a leader you should be looking at like you one of your primary goals primary call you used to form a relationship with your team with the people in her team so get it done I remember in jujitsu one time Craig McIntyre Gregory yes he he he was teaching to move and the move that he was teaching he apparently got from me and so he was teaching this move or whatever and you know I sit in their world and he was TV Tatia Tatia Tatia guitar way better than I could teach like yeah way better in fact he taught it I simply probably could not teach this move in here and after he was done he was like hey echo does his move really good to the class I could I could do you have anything to add to them it was like huh I know I don’t I don’t remember if I did I don’t think I did but just that feeling you know he included me and if you know a man it was so empowering you know you know it was you know any in his minor and I actually thinking back and in my mind like that it that was kind of my move you know yeah what move over is it gives a card past move okay come on I always do to you yeah but nonetheless like just how you say like how you asked their input kind of things like you include them in the thing and that’s not just asking it it’s actually receiving it and implementing it that’s the that’s the kick that’s the closure of the move man yeah that’s the closure of the move bro I talked about like a feeling and granted me and Gregor good friends anyway but I’m just saying like you can imagine that situation how that how anyone would feel when you especially if you’re older than this little young buck who does he think he is and it comes to you you’re like all hell yeah okay this guy knows like you know we can we can do this together you know you know really get that feeling I would imagine anyway that’s what you want to do mister youngest leader in your firm’s history Dan Congrats on that yeah Congrats on your getting after it what got you there may not get you to the next level what got you there might have been like being aggressive and making things happen and steppin up that’s cool but if you piss off everyone in your department that’s not gonna work out good for you they’ll start to undermine you they’ll sabotage you so you gotta be careful I mean okay is there a possibility that everyone in the department you got put in there to straighten things out that’s a different question that’s a different question let me tell you something else when you’re getting when people are dismissing what you’re saying that’s a horrible sign I’m one of the leadership books that we covered the rule was don’t give commands that you that will that aren’t going to be followed because every time you give a command that that you know isn’t gonna be followed that’s not gonna work out good for you it’s reinforcing the fact that no one needs to listen to you so don’t don’t be giving orders that are being dismissed if somebody doesn’t do something you go hey man I know that I might have come across a little wrong when I was talking to you about you know getting this done this product just part of this task done and I see it’s still not done is there is there some support that you need for me is there some help that you need for me because this is importantly I probably and do a good job of explaining why it’s important but it’s actually connected to this larger project that we’re doing over at headquarters and this is our part of the task and I don’t think I explained that very well but do you need anything else for me to to maybe move this along you can’t just allow things to be for you to talk to treated give directions and they just get blown off yeah like that’s not good and I’m what I’m not saying is oh you blew off my order now I’m gonna go high order on you but that’s not what I’m saying yeah yeah that makes sense to Koosman if I had a boss who else I was primed to dismiss any of his directives yeah and it happened and it happened successfully like it’s missed it and there was really no real repercussions oh you better believe I’m picking and choosing what I’m following by the way that’s not that he’s testing the envelope anyway she’s testing to see nobody can get away with but cuz you cease your young yeah the wrong one in here think he’s gonna tell me what to do watch this yeah and listen to you okay cool now if you fly off the handle and go nuts you know what you’ll get them to do it immediately yeah and then guess what you’re gonna get undermined you get usurped you’re gonna get they’re gonna have the project fail just so they can get rid of you they’re gonna laugh at you as the as you’re getting walked out by the HR department so you gotta be careful man you got to be careful that’s what I’m saying balance these things out balance extreme ownership get the book that gotta be leadership that’s what it’s about it’s about being balanced cool question Jocko what do you do when people treat you like a doormat and then when you finally put your foot down they lose their minds I try to be agreeable but there’s a limit when I stand my ground people are act shocked in the advice yeah so this is actually kind of the same thing right you’d need to be balanced because what’s happening with this dude I assume is that sitting around getting getting like a pushover like a doormat people are kind of walking all over then all of a sudden he does a instant 180 and goes it puts his foot down right and now you think that they’re gonna do a 180 you think that they’re gonna say oh sorry I didn’t mean – oh sorry echo I didn’t I didn’t know that that offended you I’m sorry no when you do that they’re like what’s wrong with you you know you just started tripping yeah yeah you’re freaking out over nothing so of course when you stand their ground they’re gonna be shocked right which is what you’re saying happened this is like no surprise at all so what you need to do is is draw the line a little bit earlier but without going nuts and I think I got a good example of how you do this okay let’s say you got a dog and the dog is like kind of mellow and happy and just doesn’t just all good and then like all of a sudden you know you’re walking by the dog one day and wow it bites you on the arm like like big time yeah big time how do you feel about that dog yeah bad I don’t like that about that dogs getting put down Yeah right just this dog right let’s say a bit one of your kids oh yeah that dogs getting put down okay so that’s that’s what this guy is doing all acting all like everything’s like nothing bothering me and all of a sudden biting people think about what a dog like a normal dog does what a normal dog does is its if it starts getting offended a little bit it starts getting problems it’s it like stands up a little bit right and then it’s gonna it’s gonna growl now that’s an indicator so even a kid even a child knows I don’t know what age but pretty young kids know that a growling dog is a is is a warning what else do dogs do dogs show their teeth that’s another warning like hey that’s another line in the sand mm-hmm and and barking right because you have to bark and I mean a dog barks at you in a dog barks unit it’s got your attention it’s growling at you you know what’s gonna happen next if you keep doing whatever it is you’re doing right you’re gonna get back away from that dog now if you did or if the bug dog did all those things to you and then it bit you you’ll still be mad at but you at least know you kind of had it coming right right yes sir so so there you go that’s what this dude needs to do a little bit of he needs to learn how to growl a little bit mm-hmm how it’ll bark a little how to show your teeth little how to just stand up posture correct because there’s you know a dog if you know dogs at all dogs have a posture mm-hmm and they have a posture their ears are down and they’re there their tails down when when they get fired up boom ears are up they’re on alert that back is they get the cackles can stand up and everything that means like okay that’s easy that’s even before growling that’s happening alert so this dude needs to learn how to come to an alert improve his paw increase his posture in those moments not when it’s getting too far but like when someone need when somebody gives you a little jab you know you can’t bite them you got a little give a little growl yeah back them off a little bit you know and again this is I don’t know you you know so it’s hard for me to say some people just have a hard time dealing with when people harass them yes because I think the best thing to do when somebody makes fun of me is just to like the hats yeah good one you know like because you know just like we were talking about before we started this podcast if I let you know that whatever you just said to me bothers me bro I can expect you to just keep getting after that until I snapped so you got to be careful you don’t want to be all hyper sense of the other thing to remember is man when people are making fun of you it’s not like they hate you most of the time yeah you know it’s it’s not that big of a deal like people talk smack to each other yeah right people talk smack to each other and and I guarantee this is this is this is a good way to think about it if someone talks smack to you if you in and then you both leave let’s say it’s at work you go home the other person that was talking smack goes home you go home you’re thinking about it that person that was talking smack didn’t think about it one millisecond after he left the office he doesn’t care he’s not sitting there thinking about you he’s not thinking like men man I’m really glad I told you know he had a funny looking eyebrows that was awesome I can’t believe no weird his eyebrows are like I mean that’s like he’s not doing that right he’s not even thinking about it he just went home he’s carrying on his life carry on with your life don’t get all tied up about what these other people are thinking of you it’s not that big of a deal don’t sit around thinking about it’s it’s a it’s a perception that we have that the whole world revolves around us and then people are sitting around thinking about us all the time it’s like they’re not thinking about you all the time they don’t care they’re there at home there’s not too many people that are actually thinking about you all the time especially if they’re making fun of you like they’re they’re not thinking about that all the time so just relax take a wrap off and just you know try and have a little bit less tension and you know and try and learn to growl a little bit or at least protect your space a little bit and these are kind of contrary contradictory things that I’m saying one of them’s like hey laughs out of the other ones I kind of learned to growl a little bit I would say first the first method is better the first method is like hey just laugh it off don’t worry about it these people aren’t thinking about you they don’t care then probably it’s like when we had jordan peterson as he was talking about his friend lunch bucket right lunch bucket the guy that worked in and as soon as everyone realized that it bothered him that they called him lunch bucket that everyone just called him lunch bucket and then they he quit because he couldn’t handle it so they’ll be if you if someone calls you lunch bucket nicole yeah my mom makes a good sandwich mom makes a pretty good Sammie you know and then boom you break out the lunch bucket they’re like you know go with it no no factor yeah you start freaking out about this stuff gonna drive you crazy so yeah be careful don’t freak out about stuff if you have to learn to stand your ground a little bit but don’t just start snapping good dog yeah like a rabid dog yeah that that that is a good little escalation that examples yeah escalating of a dog nice piece because sure I mean getting treated like a doormat that could look like a bunch of different things you know it’s teasing that seems like the obvious one or whatever but you know that could be a lot of stuff yeah that could be like hey grab me some coffee yeah right sometimes people just do that cuz you haven’t ever said to him like you know like hey man are you ever gonna get me coffee well you don’t just make a joke about the same thing yeah exactly like dealing with it like as a you know if something bothers you so that and I could see this may be happening cuz every once in a while like you know you kind of run into these scenarios where like someone does something that you you don’t really like or you don’t I don’t appreciate the way they treated me right there during that scenario and it sort of always happens but it’s too small to make a big deal out of it at that time and when you’re a agreeable person yeah you’re just like alright yeah I’m gonna essentially I’m gonna let it slide whatever you know but it happens again then again but I’m agreeable I’m letting it slide haha maybe I’ll even lock it off whatever so to the other person they’re just like whatever they’re just so how you said they’re not thinking about this is great about their business and they’re getting a laugh here and there which instantly gets forgotten and whatever they keep going about their business no no no factor meanwhile in my head I’m like man I’m tired of this I’m straight-up so what happens one day maybe I got a little less sleep that day or something one teeny-tiny thing from flying off the handle hey I don’t appreciate this this and that you do you always do it and they are like these artists because even if I did I didn’t get any so then you get this little reputation people act shocked as the guy says you know when I stand my ground it’s the other person it’s kind of like why are you standing your ground right now it doesn’t make sense like even if I did remember all the times I’ve done this you were laughing the whole time like it doesn’t compute it was already now that I know what I think I think about times my life like when I was younger then someone would stand their ground on me or whatever and I’d be like you I’d be the exact person that you’re talking about saying what are you talking about man like I have no idea what you’re talking about yeah why are you freaking out right now yeah and then you would say stuff like that and maybe I put together okay baby I do make whereas now that I’m older if someone wants to freak out like that on me I would instantly recognize thinking myself like you know what I probably do things that I shouldn’t I probably oh yeah I kind of ride this person that’s why they’re freaking out right now yeah a little bit more aware yeah of my impact yeah and but in a way you sort of had to I mean I’m sure you’ve sort of you’re sort of familiar with this you know even like painting that picture it’s like it’s obviously you’re familiar with yeah yeah you know but when it’s happening to you you’re kind of not but then if you have to go go back and do like some investigation of your whole like relationship with a person to understand okay now I see how that could have been interpreted back last year and then maybe three months ago and then maybe last week and then like right now okay I’m after you know then it it but it doesn’t compute naturally you know so yeah if you do that the escalating dog yes thing it’ll it’ll be more clear I think yeah maybe an escalated dog only escalate the dog scenario if you can’t just have a good time with it and relax and not worry about it yeah which is the primary goal yes but being treated like a doormat like I said like if you know like people were just so you know people people please their type of person like in a relationship or something like um you know like I can’t think of an example but of a movie references very pathetic anyway if you like a people-pleasing you do everything for you know and then they don’t do it back you know kind of thing like oh yeah you let your you know husband or wife or whatever you let them go out every Saturday just because they want you they want to go play poker or you know one of these things that what’s the common thing that they do and they do and they come back late on drugs but no way it would be way worse than that it’ll be just a total like whatever you need or want you got it and then like the one time they say hey I want to go shopping on this shopping well you got to do this you got to do the kid you know like that kind of work where it’s like a disproportionate like relationship you know a thing like that can I can see how it can go down with those types or you know like beneath it you can’t just laugh those things off no in life you know you do have to do the escalation of just be like hey that’s a little bit more serious yeah yeah true X wish hey joko I’m business owner in the beginning stages of merging with another company the other company doesn’t know much about what we do but has the sales and marketing marketing we need just at a conference with just that a conference call with them and it didn’t go well they’re wanting to change the pay structure for contractors as well as change how we build our customers all the all for the benefit of money chi-ching yeah save some money on that one isn’t it not a good idea to have have the primary mission be about money and more so on the success of the customer or is it good to be money motivated I I have and enjoy all your books oh that’s cool the advice would be you know so that means you’ve read the dichotomy leadership because it is this is the answer of the day need to be more balanced okay so if you’re money hungry right which is what this is sounding like if you’re money hungry correct if you’re money hungry you’re gonna cut corners on product the product is gonna be weak or low-quality you’re gonna do wrong by the customer right because when you when you get a chance to you know the customer the customer placed an order a double order by accent they click the click thing twice and it’ll just enough to pay that restocking fee you know whatever like whatever the thing is right you treat customers like that they’re gonna go okay well we don’t really want to shop with you anymore and you end up with a bad reputation and the quality is low and no eventually you have no more business that’s what’s gonna happen so so no we can’t go hardcore money-grubbing just that’s our that’s our focus other end of the spectrum is hey we’re paying our contractors too much can it’s that possible yes it’s possible you’re giving your customers too much you’re giving them too good of a price point and guess what’s now we’re gonna happen same thing you’re going to not have a business so one you have a you your business goes out of business because your because you don’t have any business anymore because you’ve treated your customers bad and the contractors don’t want to work with you so you have you end up shutting down this one’s opposite you’re you everyone loves you you just don’t have any money so you’re going on a business you so there has to be some balance you have to find the right balance that’s what every company is trying to do now I would say that you would you where you want to lean and this is probably what you’re thinking you want to lean toward taking care of the customer you want to lean toward giving the contractors good value for their work you want to lean toward high quality the reason you want to lean towards those things as those are all long-term strategic payoffs right what’s the short term the short term is take advantage of the customers the short term is screw over the contractors the short term is put out low quality stuff we make good profit this quarter yeah but it’s it’s a short-term win it’s a long time long term loss so that’s why I would say lean don’t go out of control you can’t go out of control in that direction but you can lean towards that direction now as far as the new company the merger and all this stuff get it I get it here’s what’s gonna happen what you need to go and build good relationships with those people the new company they need to be your best friends because if you build relationships with them then you can have influence over these points if you have an antagonistic relationship and you’re the new guy or whatever like oh yeah the new company you you think they don’t you’re saying that event what did you say they don’t know what we do right what do you think they think they think you don’t know what they do they’re thinking you know what you don’t even hey you guys make good might make good product but you can’t sell anything we got sales and we got market we could sell anything we don’t care what it looks like we don’t care what the quality is that’s what they’re thinking yeah so you need to form a relationship with them because I will tell you with their sales and marketing if you’re making a good product that’s how we get the big-time win but if you have an antagonistic relationship with them it’ll all fall apart and you won’t have any influence at all and they’ll be like you don’t even know what you’re talking about dude we’re just gonna Jack the price even more and we’re gonna undercut our perk contractors we need contractors competing with each other they’re gonna hate each other they’re gonna hate us but it doesn’t matter look at our bottom line so build some relationships their next wish I’m conflicted about where my loyalty lies I have a wife and two children but I recently took a job within federal law enforcement and based on my prior tactical experience I’ll be given the opportunity to attend a two-weeks selection for a position as an operator on a full-time tactical team that will most certainly pull me away from my family my heart is in the right place I know this level of sacrifice is needed in order to keep evil at bay however I believe every father feels that obligation to be at home to raise the children and I’m learning that balancing duty responsibility loyalty commitment to family to country is hard and may be impossible all right so oh yeah and he goes on to say that I know you have made this decision yourself yep and I would say to this dude actually you are the only person that can make this decision and you’re right I did make that decision I did 20 years and I at the end of 20 years decided to prioritize my family over the military and over my own desires too because believe me the selfish thing is just keep getting after it but also what’s important I was not good at balancing right I’ve I ranked and prioritized the teams above my family the whole time I was in and not everyone does that some people are much better at balancing than I did and that’s how they do 30 in 32 years and 34 years and 27 years they’ve figured out how to balance that better than I did and so it sounds like you’re even raising this question indicates to me that you probably have a decent chance of being able to be better at balancing than I do so there’s that the other thing I would say is you say that the being operate on a full-time tactical team will most certainly pull me away from my family I would research that a little bit you know because sometimes when you get to a little higher level you have more flexibility and you might might actually have time to spend with your family might be a little bit different maybe you’re hauling to call whereas normally you wouldn’t be on call the novice on your on call but your while you’re on call you’re at least you know you’re you might be doing you might have more family time I don’t know I can tell you that you know sometimes depending on the way you look at it you know if you look at the Special Operations community versus the conventional community and it just depends on the units depends on a lot of things but sometimes you know the conventional forces go on a you know 16 month deployment to Iraq and that’s a long time some special operations units going on four month deployments and they’re come home now they now they might do more of those over their career but again that’s something you need to you need to find out the facts you need to talk to someone that’s on that team and say hey listen here’s what’s going on I got two sons they wrestle and they do jujitsu and I’d like to go to those tournaments what’s our schedule like how is it gonna be you know and then you kind of you can make a better assessment I wouldn’t just assume that the tactical team has a busier schedule I could be wrong I could be completely wrong what what you’re probably the assumption you’re making which is a decent assumption is that when you’re part of a part of an elite tactical team you’re gonna have to input more time it’s gonna it’s gonna it’s gonna mean more to you and you’re gonna be like okay I need to train more I’m gonna tell you should train more no matter what position you’re in right you need to be training as much as you can you need to be staying sharp so I would do some research on that and then I would also consider this men have been leaving their families so they could go and fight evil since the beginning of time whether it was they were going out to fight the Lions or whether they were going out to fight some we’re going to invade other countries or gonna find treasure or whatever whatever they were doing people have been doing it even world war two guys left and there’s no guarantee that they were coming home they left for two three four years those that’s the way it works doesn’t your boys are not going to be there not their lives aren’t going to be ruined if you’re not there at every ball game and I’ll tell you there’s actually if you do that your sons will learn the meaning of duty and sacrifice more than a normal kid would so so pay attention to that too again all that being said this is something that only you can make the call on because you’re you can analyze the details of the situation and you know what if your wife works or your wife works or that wife doesn’t work that makes a big deal if your wife works and you’re gone all the time that’s a problem now who’s raising your kids you got to pay attention to that if you–if you both work but you both work normal jobs now you’re home and you’re don’t you’re you know you’re there enough so just weigh these things out but I would I would get the details and then make a decision and you know what no matter what decision you make it’s the right decision how’s that that’s pretty simple you’re if you make a decision and you’re gonna go on the tactical team cool if you don’t cool you’re still doing federal law enforcement awesome keeping the keeping the monsters at bay yeah the thing that helped me a lot that you explained early on is to tell them why you’re tell people why you’re doing what you’re doing you know the team and in this case the family or whatever and in this specific case probably your wife yeah so if you’re feeling that because I did it I did that the feeling of like oh I feel like I’m not being as loyal to my family because I’m like focusing on work yeah kind of thing so I’ll get that from time to time you know especially if I’m like super focused and it’s like dang I didn’t think about my kids or family all day today you know I’ll have that little fun whatever I did yeah and I used to go like four months I’m thinking about my family or such horrible well it’s a sliding scale so you know but I do know that the more I communicate with my wife and be like hey I have to go here and I’m this is what I’m gonna I’m gonna really try to focus on this you know this week you know so he video this week and you know I am busy yeah I’ll be be so I might not be here for this in this and you know like I might miss this you know and just lay it all out why you’re doing it you know how you always say and a lot of the times your loyalty will be demonstrating demonstrated with that you know like it’s like hey I’m doing my job it’s the time requirements are a little bit more or whatever like I want you to know like what can I can we do anything can we adjust anything to make it better for everybody you’re onner percent right and and actually to take that one step further including your wife into the decision-making process where you’re like hey listen hon this if I do this job it’s gonna be more but a it’s gonna be super rewarding to me and sometimes that’s enough you know you tell your wife this is gonna be super rewarding for me because I’m gonna be able to go and kill bad guys which is or protect innocent people which is what I want to do that’s what I signed up for and I’m gonna be able to do it in a in a more complete way and there’s a chance your wife says you know what I know that’s what you’re born to do go do it or she might say listen you’ve done that already you know let’s focus on the family and you cool yeah those are both good decisions yeah we’re in a win-win situation here yeah that’s the bottom line dude next question chuckle I’m 19 and my in my first year at college ever since I was 12 I’ve dreamed about being a marine or seal I plan on joining up after college but I just got diagnosed with epilepsy I only have seizures in my sleep so I never noticed them I always thought of serving in the military as a way that I would prove to myself that I was a man and that it would be it give my life a purpose now I don’t know what to do I hate the idea of living some comfortable life where I have a cozy nine-to-five job that I only do for the money I want something hard and meaningful what should I do there’s an infinite number of options that you have so you need to just pick one of those options find a new career of that you think looks cool and then go get after it and you got a figure you want to you don’t want a nine-to-five job Cole there’s all kinds of jobs that are nine-to-five you know whether it’s construction management construction or gas oil or some kind of public safety there’s all kinds of things I don’t know if you can be a firefighter I don’t know if you can be a cop if you have epilepsy I’m not sure but there’s all kinds of different jobs and careers and there’s jobs that are hard and there’s jobs that are incredibly meaningful to our economy here and the more you help our economy here the more you help us have a positive influence in the world so go and figure out what job that you want to do and go crush it and go you don’t build an empire and make a ton of money and then if you want to great then you can support some veterans causes and you can give back that way so so that’s cool there’s there’s it’s always impressive to me we work with all kinds of different companies a national on front it’s always so impressive to me when I meet people from every possible industry that you can imagine and they’re completely into their job they are so into their job they’re fighting World War nine like they’re that into it you know they’re run an Intel they’ll run an Operations they’re driving down every dollar matters everything that they’re doing they’re so into it and it’s awesome and and this is everything this is every different industry I see people like that no not every person in every industry is like that but if you find something that you’re interested is in and you jump in there and that’s gonna be your vocation right now there’s another part to this that is kind of I guess like in your head or whatever that’s like some kind of hard living that’s not that’s not very difficult to come up with right go start training jiu-jitsu go start training some box and go start wrestling go do muy Thai go start shooting go start lifting and seeing how strong you can get and seen how powerful you can get go learn to hunt and learn to hike and learn to play guitar and learn just learn a bunch of stuff become a force to be reckoned with and you know the bottom line is being a seal or being a Marine does not prove that you are a man there are plenty of losers in both of those organizations and so don’t know you don’t need some label to make you a man that’s not what makes you a man be your own man go out and conquer your part of the world next question two questions I recently attended an assessment for retraining let’s say one more thing hmm sorry when things like this happen like when something happens to me this is you want to hear my weird superstitious view of the world sure it’s sort of it’s sort of reminiscent of everything happens for a reason you’ve heard that everyone’s heard that for me something like this when something like this happens to me when something happens in my life that I didn’t want to have happen when I didn’t expect to happen I get an unpleasant surprise I look at it and assess it like okay this is this is happening so that’s something else this is trying to prevent something else from happening to me that I would have been really catastrophic I hurt my knee the other day doing jujitsu doing doing wrestling and I you know I’m on my way driving home I’m like you know what this is preventing me from wrecking my shoulder in two weeks or the next night I was probably gonna wreck my shoulder which is which is you know a catastrophic injury on my shoulder that’s what was about to happen to me and the powers that be knew the only way to get me off the mat was to hurt my knee bad enough that it pulled me off the map for for a couple weeks there’s a boom there you go here you go Jocko you’re welcome yeah so something like this this is an indicator far as I’m concerned you have some bigger and better thing that you need to do so hey it wasn’t this yeah that’s cool accept it like right on say thank you because there’s people that they it’s not epilepsy that they have they have something that debilitates them from doing even things that you are capable of doing so be stoked that this delivery came from wherever it comes from whatever it is that you believe in that this dis dis god this happened because it’s it’s putting you on the path I guess that’s what I’m saying yeah putting you on the path so who knows what you’re supposed to do but you’re supposed to do something because you’re not supposed to be a seal you’re not supposed to be a marine if you were supposed to be that that would happen it didn’t happen that’s not a bad thing that means there’s some other doors gonna open up big yeah so that’s the way I always look at injuries like that yeah the most positive way I can look at injuries is hey I was going to whatever I was gonna look like I was gonna rip apart triple threat on my knee in four days so I just got a little ding to pull me off the mat so that doesn’t happen yeah oh I needed rest here’s what you get boom you’re gonna get this yeah I’ll have those thoughts do some yes like it’s kind of like oh I’m safe from injury because I’m already injured kind of thing yeah it’s like there you go so weird feeling yeah but that is true and yeah and kind of like a lot of times do it and this is so good that that guy this guy is he knows already I want to do something harden me bro I’m man 19 1999 him yeah he’s totally on the path and you know he’s just discovering what doors he wants to you know what doors are open while the doors are closed whatever you know and he’s disc up man when I was 19 yeah I didn’t know direction dude did I ever have the thought of hey yeah I want to do something hard and meaningful did I ever have that thought hmm no I did not have that thought ever waits or something this but yeah man that’s good so yeah I think you yeah yeah there’s no there’s no label that makes you a man you do Jack and you’re doing a good job so far all right next question two questions I recently attended assessment for retraining into the combat control career field I’m active duty for Air Force in a different career field and rang the bell during water confidence training how do I live with my decision and move forward yeah and there’s you see there’s two there’s two questions that are basically the same question so that was part a and this is Part B I do read do hard deal art okay drop on request gotcha I’m wearing the belt same thing so I deal art from buds class 303 I went went on to be a SAR CORS CORS me star swimmer star swimmer corpsman so here’s a he’s a rescue swimmer okay but it’s Tatum but it’s taken until recently to regain the desire to live and even strive to work out again what can you do when you realize a life path you’ve chosen was not only wrong but you never feel like you found a new path to me this this question both these questions are kind of similar to the previous one right and I can tell you being a being a seal or being a combat controller is not the be-all end-all and the bottom line is it wasn’t for you it wasn’t for you it wasn’t even you don’t want you guys it just wasn’t for you and the fact that matters it’s not for most people it’s not normal there’s an 80% attrition rate of but most people quit good people I was down there the other day and osakan one of my buddies that runs runs it runs he’s a civilian but he’s one of the civilians that works there but he was we were talking about you know what it about buds and I forget what even led into it but he pointed at that you know when you when you quit but you put your helmet by the Bell and so as more and more people quit important more helmets are enough and there’ll be hundreds of helmets lined up and he’s like you see those helmets right there and I’m like yeah he goes every single one of those kids was a stud and when I went through it wasn’t quite like that because not everyone that was showing up at Budds in the 90s was a stud sir the they weren’t because we didn’t know what was happening we didn’t know we didn’t know how to do a pull-up workout we couldn’t look online and see a program on how to get better at rope climbs we didn’t know that you had to swim with fins we didn’t know I didn’t know what I didn’t know anything when I showed up to buds so these kids now they know everything and so what do they do they prepare all of them at a minimum I would say the minimum guy prepared now is probably prepared at least as good as the most prepared guy actually that’s probably that’s probably inaccurate I bet you the minimum the least prepared guy entering buds right now is probably still more prepared than the most prepared guy that went to buds when I went through now so so my point in saying that is most of those people that are studs quit most of those people that join the Navy that sign on a dotted line and commit six years of their life because there’s nothing more they want to do than be a seal and most of them don’t make it through so it’s not for everyone and then you know what you you’ve one guy in the airforce one guy in the Navy you did your job you did we’re supposed to do a corpsman whatever your normal career field was in the Air Force and you served your country and you did what the country needed you to do the country needs you to do whatever job you did the country needed you to do that job so thank you for your service and now you go and find something else you go and find a new mission and the same things here like you want to get better with your life so what do you do you work and you build and you study and you get an awesome physical condition and you train jiu-jitsu and you become a doctor or a firefighter or EMT you’re a cop and there’s whichever way that you figure out that you can serve you become a business person you go and work construction whatever it is that you do you go and do it you do it hard and you don’t get caught up in a title right so this is another thing it’s kind of reflects back to we were talking earlier eels don’t care that you weren’t a seal you know like it’s not like seals are walking around going oh this person wasn’t a seal I don’t respect them this person wasn’t see I don’t respect him we don’t care it’s a vocation it’s a job so you know I don’t look down on people that weren’t seals it’s just that was my job you had a different job right it’s it’s like it’s like jiu-jitsu I don’t look down on people that don’t trained jiu-jitsu I look at them like hey you should because that’s a choice mm-hmm but let me rephrase that I don’t look down on people that I can beat in jiu-jitsu because I know for a fact all it is is that I’ve been training longer than them and once they train longer than me they’ll be able to beat me that’s the way it works so people that were in the SEAL Teams aren’t looking down on you because you weren’t they don’t care I’m not thinking about it so when I meet a cop when I meet a firefighter when I meet a business person I respect what they’re doing with their life if they’re getting after it I don’t care what arena it’s in man I know some I’m so lucky right now working national on front we meet people that have just just awesome humans that are crushing their field and if they were in the SEAL Teams they’d be crushing that field but they didn’t they went to what they went and did what they did they went in the finance world they went in the construction world they went in the gas oil business whatever they did they did and they’re getting after it so that’s what you need to do you quit in the past you rang the bell no one cares unless you quit now so get up go find a new mission and get after it man get after it next question you’ve been unfairly wronged by a brother mm-hmm objectively hmm you aren’t getting the full apology that you expected the beef is over now and he treats you well but how do you psychologically reframe and kill that lingering resentment unfairly wronged by a brother interesting brothers don’t wrong brothers we’ll start with that so this dude wasn’t actually a bro a brother met him in a brawl but he wasn’t a brother you make a little distinction there is that distinction never been made before I don’t think on this off platform they’re making it cool there’s like hey this guy’s my bro it’s all good and then there’s like this guy’s my brother my brother is not gonna wronged me my bro might but my brother’s not gonna wronged me so that he so if it happens some guy like I said if somebody that you consider your brother wrong is even that clearly you you overestimated their really commitment so here’s what’s gonna happen me number one it’s noted noted that’s my that’s my ultimate that’s my ultimate satisfaction right when I note when it’s it when I note something yeah oh it’s like oh this is the kind of kind of person he is noted right now I got him now I got this person marked so Trust is not gonna be reestablished for a long long time if ever mmm-hmm right I’m not gonna like this person clearly but here’s the deal all that mistrust and all that dislike and all that is gonna be internal I’m gonna keep it inside because you know what I’m gonna have those inside I’m in a harbor that I’m gonna harbor those things even this resentment I’m gonna harbor it because I can’t I can’t just make it go wait you-you-you wronged me it’s gonna be there yeah but you know what I’m a professional externally I’m a professional even if we’re not a business even if it just like hair I I trained you just do it right I’m a professional so I’m not gonna let his little maneuvers get me externally worked up about it it’s not happening you don’t get control my emotions like that external you might control them inside but I won’t let you see that ever so I’m a professional I’m a normal face that’s where I’m coming at you from just normal face Hey all good oh yeah and you know what’s interesting this behavior so when you screw me over and then I just go okay check noted and then I don’t give you a reason to like hate me and then you kind of owe me yeah you know what I mean so there’s that and there’s a there’s a fine line like if you screw me over and then I just allow it to happen and it was a it was a violent violation well then there might be have to be repercussions right it sounds like this did not warrant repercussions mm-hmm because you know there’s certain situations if somebody wrongs you in certain ways there has to be repercussions to me normally most of the time the repercussions and the best revenge that you can take is is to ignore now perform and be successful in rock on and forget about them and forget they even exist it that to me is the best possible way to go because why would you let somebody interfere why would you commit any time effort resources to revenge when I would the better thing to do is commit those time resources energy to success to winning yeah I’m gonna do that but if this merits some sort of repercussions okay then those get carried out and if those get carried out well then we’re we’re kind of settled but he says you didn’t get the full apology you expected it sack okay then hey guess what people are arrogant yeah that’s the way it is they don’t think the guy didn’t think he did anything wrong most likely he’s not even apologizing for it barely so that’s what I do I’m just gonna keep it professional I’m gonna you’re gonna be subconsciously indebted to me whether you know it or not yeah you probably know it you’ll probably feel because I’m just gonna okay cool yeah we’ll move on but Atman you know the thing is this is sort of goes back to that other kind of topic today like this guy isn’t going around thinking about you yeah so why are you thinking about him let’s move on man let’s move forward and it seems like a big part of it right like that it seems like he was he says you aren’t you aren’t getting the full apology you know like remember on that Seinfeld that apology dude I was talking to someone I was talking to someone like a blanket apology I was talking to someone that we both know whose will say up a public figure and this individual was reading YouTube comments and getting legitimately like emotionally distraught about the whole thing yeah and was was trying to talk to me about it and like I said man I literally do not care like I do not care like this is no factor you don’t need to warn me you don’t need to tell me you know what I need to look out for like I literally don’t care yeah I mean if someone writes a good YouTube comment good it’s funny that’s great if they write in a mean one cool I think those are funny too yeah I’m not I’m not worried about it the person that wrote the YouTube coming isn’t thinking about me yeah you know they’re not try they’re not they’re not reviewing it again yeah and writing it again and you know like they don’t care I’m not getting all caught up in this stuff don’t caught up in these petty things you know I did that we talked about this on the podcast of of of the black belt the black belt doesn’t care about things that don’t matter you can grab the the black belts shoulder of his gay and he’s doesn’t care because he knows that doesn’t mean anything there’s no there’s no that’s no factor mm-hm so you wanna that’s that’s what you want to do you wanna you don’t want to care about things that don’t matter you don’t invest your time and energy things no matter the guy wrongs you cool noted you know that he’s kind of a kind of a a devious dude you know that it’s noted cool move on yeah no I’m not worried about it am I gonna put my trust in him again no but that’s cool cuz I know other people to trust yeah well let’s not get wrapped around these little things man let’s let’s let’s let’s let’s let’s rise above get some Black Flag going here let’s rise above I still wonder what kind of polish I’d totally cut you off so sorry but yeah and I is the Saint felt thing it didn’t matter the but I’m wondering one at the same time what you saying I agree but mm-hmm I do wonder what kind of apology he got you know cuz he didn’t get the full apology near partial yeah so well partial apology that can come in many forms yeah it’s probably the most common form of a partial apology has a butt on it yes yeah I’m sorry I’m sorry we did swing by and pick the others up the other night but I just didn’t even know that you wanted to come yeah yeah kind of like it was my fault I’m sorry but yeah it was partially your fault kind of thing and then there’s the other one that’s like I’m sorry you felt that way you know you know that one worth like hey I’m sorry you felt that that I was attacking you you know but you know I didn’t mean to kind of thing where it’s kind of like hey you’re because the person doesn’t want an apology for necessarily the actual words you said it was it was like what you did mm-hm like you attacked me with whatever you said you know kind of things so you can’t just say hey I can’t I’m sorry I start I’m sorry that you felt that way yeah you know that is a pretty backhanded sort of yeah same thing but the but well the one you say but I’m sorry but you know I didn’t know that’s kind of like I’m sorry but I’m not fully like yeah that’s the same are you saying with extreme ownership yeah that’s when people say you know look I’m in charge of the team and this was definitely I’m in charge of team when I’m in charge didn’t didn’t when things go wrong it’s my fault but I’ll tell you what sorry yeah sorry yeah and my way from time to time well where are no excuses yeah there’s nobody think about it when you get somebody that actually believes in extreme ownership there is there are no buts on anything that they say and strangely I mean kind of I guess coincidental incident i Ryan and I are old daughter who will not allow you to make an excuse you know their old daughter yeah she will call you if you throw a but or you say well I didn’t know when we had to be there oh so you’re not taking ownership yeah yes yeah totally makes sense and if you it’s strangely like if you do it without the but you know when you do it just full speed even if in your head you believe but I mean let’s face it man you had it coming to you kind of did yeah just keep it because that’s not what you’re doing when you apologize that’s that’s separate from the apology you know it’s like you’re including this stuff unwarranted stuff with your apology don’t do that give a good apology in original work is the worst thing is is it’s so obvious and it makes everyone so mad oh yeah the receiving end of that is so mad and you think that it’s you think that it’s improving your position yeah cuz my look I would look hey echo I’m really sorry that you showed up to record and I wasn’t there and I didn’t let you know but yeah but I didn’t really I didn’t remember texting you or whatever like like but you know you should have told me that you were heading that so that’s the whatever yeah but you should have told me that we were definitely recording because you didn’t really get back to me yeah like why would I say that yeah all’s I’m doing is you know what’s funniest people always tweet me when a sports coach they tweet me when a sports coach either takes ownership or doesn’t over yes not overtly cuz some guys some sports coach to say hey look I’m the coach I made some bad calls out there we’re gonna get back in the drawing room I’m gonna get this thing fixed and if it goes man this guy’s awesome and it’s just so funny everyone says this guy is awesome he’s taking ownership even people that aren’t even people will retweet something that they people aren’t saying he’s taking extreme ownership so I want to say oh it’s good to see a coach taking full responsibility or whatever they’ll use their own word for it and then some other knucklehead sure look we’ll we’ll say you know um I am the coach and I’m responsible for the team but if I got players that aren’t gonna put out over in the fourth quarter yeah you know you got to carry out totally embarrassing friend everyone says hey you might want to learn how to take ownership yeah and that’s where people so it’s so obvious and yet we still do it we still throw out the butts we still want to clarify our position yeah don’t clarify your position say sorry take ownership knows it my wife will watch these nobody call it the housewives one not the show like the reality show ones you know the whatever Housewives of where and men riddled I think that’s why she watches it just to see the trainwreck I think that’s what I think is my suspicion but men yeah they’re all arguing with each other and then you know they’re crying and then the one will say they’ll just they’ll say the perfect example of the non-apology you know every single time yeah man it’s like it hurts your heart to watch but you kind of like you kind of dated I wonder I wonder if this is because this is what happened with this guy just I just figured it out right now I really don’t know but this is what I think okay theoretically yes there was a guy relationship there was a what a girl guy relationship okay you know boyfriend-girlfriend scenario you know maybe this guy got drunk the bro the brother bro whatever got drunk maybe hit on the girl maybe something happened maybe something did it oh and then it was like hey sorry about what I do with Christine last night I was super hammered yes but I was super hammered yeah exactly right and that’s a big one that’s a big but in the apology you know but you know we all had I remember someone sent time someone did I won’t go into it doesn’t matter but it’s a big one yeah it’s a big deal or it’s a big common one we wronged by a brother but no it was my like parents friend okay it’s lady and she like she was talking she was talking shit about my mom to my dad and I was there they’re hammered or whatever I’d like some you know things and she’s like totally talking she talked about this I’m gonna do it I’m gonna do it so I’m like whatever I’m like a TI maybe 15 16 years old oh maybe maybe I don’t know whatever but you know and a teenager I wasn’t like a three-year-old you know so I heard and I knew what she was talking about it was rude who’s uncoolest on Sat mm-hmm as we say and some like cool all right go home eight I tell my mom straight up so I mom’s like oh whoa okay you know tells my dad blahblah my dad tells the lady and the lady of course is all like you know like I did this and you know so she comes to me and she says sorry right like sorry for this or but we had you know we had a lot to drink or whatever and all this stuff and I remember feeling that like how is like how does this make it better you know when you’re like but we had so I’m thinking that and I didn’t know anything about drinking I don’t know what it made you sort of do I didn’t really know at that time so to me it was like wait so wait when you drink like you can do that kind of stuff or what like what’s the the deal and the the apology just basically bounced off me like bullets off a Superman or something yeah you know I’ll probably don’t put the butts on those things yes so that’s what happened with this guy that’s what I think possible but it is his responsibility like you said to be like hey I can’t hold on to this thing you know like what do you say how do you psychologically reframe it and kill that lingering resentment thing is that it’s like a scar you have to – he’s like keeping it a wound you gotta aim at it yeah and you gotta be like that’s just a scar it’s like sure our relationship is different now just guard now deal but man I got more important things to think about do whatever yeah if you can pull that off you be good move on next question hello and thank you sir I’m an inner-city math teacher an OG hardcore kid I successfully approached my students as a team that I’m the leader of how do I discipline some of my key players and at the same time boost or at least not lower morale awesome well that’s cool I would say this if you’ve got kids in the classroom and they got key players in the classroom do what I always say to do to people put them in charge of stuff man and put them in charge put these kids in charge of things in the class not just dumb stuff either not just clean up not just sweeping the floor but some legitimate stuff like hey I want you to come up with a lesson plan for tomorrow here’s the book that we’re looking at here’s the pages I want you to talk about dang I want you to lead the discussion that we’re gonna have in class hey I want you to go over how you solve this math problems tomorrow you got you got some of the problems wrong on the test I want to teach them to you and I want you to teach the class because obviously I didn’t do a good job maybe you can do a better job than me and you know what you you you’re kind of you kind of loud let’s put that to use I know people listen to you here’s another thing kid the kids look at you look at you and they look up to you let’s use that let’s try and get kids moving in the right direction so that’s what I would do in a situation like this if someone’s actually getting in trouble I wouldn’t you don’t do this you don’t do what I’m talking about because they’re in trouble right that’s a little bit you can’t say you’re in trouble so you’re gonna have to teach across to me no no that doesn’t work you say you say hey you let that whatever they got punished for you use you know your punishment that could be something like taking out trash yeah but you don’t want to throw leadership at someone when they get in trouble occasionally you can do it occasion you can be like okay you know what you’re in charge of the platoon for this week or for these four days of admin and all of a sudden yeah you realize oh you got a comment at five o’clock in the morning oh you got to stay until 1800 at night oh you got these reports – oh yeah it’s like all these things that you didn’t think about that’s what you’ve got to do and when you get off that restriction and you get out of that role you realize hey I have a little respect for the boss because I realized what the boss is going through so that’s what I would do have some fun with this put the kids in charge of stuff give them little assignments make them get up make them turn them into leaders turn them into leaders check we think one more what do you do when you fail and how do you handle it what do you do when you fail you know recently we reviewed that US Army Field Manual on here from like World War 2 era and it says in that manual it says other than death all failure is psychological other than death all failure is psychological think about that just just just think about that this failure this upset this this catastrophe if you aren’t dead then it’s just psychological it’s in your head now this does not mean that you won’t lose some battles because you will we all will but it does mean that as long as you don’t surrender as long as you don’t give up as long as you don’t quit then you haven’t failed just means you’ve made a a temporary tactical retreat means you’ve made a a brief withdraw so that you can regroup and we attack so as far as I’m concerned if you get beat unless you’re dead you are not defeated and you have not failed what you’ve done is you’ve learned you’ve you’ve gained experience and you’re still alive then you have memories to make so get up and go get after it and I think that’s all I’ve got for tonight so echo Charles yes speaking of getting after it sure getting after it can you help us in that category yes so we are on the path part of that part of that path like we always say is jiu-jitsu it’s funny how like you’ll say do you like when you would suggest someone to or your suggestion for someone to like move on or to like you know get out of a rut or whatever you always said you did yes and rightly so yes you know it’s one of those things men where I I’m not psychologists I know you know that but I think that it’ll cure various levels of Defense real hey I’ve taken a lot of flack over that yeah I’ve taken a lot of flack over that I think Joe Rogan sure when I was on his you know we were basically saying like worked out you know feel better and never got all mad right but the funny thing is Tim Ferriss who’s actually gone through that kind of depression will tell you the exact same thing yeah so yeah work out work out and do jiu-jitsu for sure yeah it’s crazy with you know why I’d say dude it’s even more than just like a regular workout whatever that even means um is because you have a challenge that’s a little bit more obviously like you against like an obvious challenge you know and for you against the person there’s that okay and then there’s the physical part of it of course like the workout part of it which is one of the best workouts like if I wanted to like lose 30 pounds right first I don’t know whatever if I want to lose 30 pounds like bad pounds right so I you know and right now as of right now there’s no way I would do like a weight loss workout I would just do regular weightlifting and I would just do more jujitsu that’s it 100% like why would you some screen I mean jiu-jitsu is such a good workout yeah why would you work out muscles that you didn’t know you had your whole body today by the way whole BOTS yeah even your jaw muscles yeah yeah yeah oh yeah everything especially you with the jaw muscles because you spend a lot of time on the court or the back pocket terrain or coincidentally that’s another part of it is what I was about to say so aspect 800 for you for everybody yeah for you to in have a little conversation oh yeah post training yeah even like between rounds whatever it’s like you’re doing it and sure you can do that at the gym kind of but it’s different or what it’s weighted he won’t want to talk before training I protest that you know I protest it I start block Brett – gobe okay the five minute rounds are on you guys are rolling video then enough of this chitter chatter here’s how prevalent the social element is you know no and you’ll agree with it because it happens with you too so you ever like shaking kids clock started beep clock started you shake hands with a person and then you just sneak in one question to the person like that socially no not all the time because like the time you know you remember like I’ll do with great I’ll do it I won’t joke about that Oh like we’ll talk about our day like Andy and I will joke about yeah yeah like beep clock starts and it’s like how’s work today do yeah yeah yeah basically what it means is neither one of us feels like training yeah laughs and then we’ll train right because we won’t we won’t actually have a conversation right but see how you know that it’s a it is a thing it so much that you make jokes about yesterday’s if that’s how social it is you know and Matt’s like no I just gotta tie my belt and adjust my D and put my knee pads back up and you know what I mean yeah yeah there’s another stalling tactics yeah not very social but yeah it’s stalling for sure um but there’s a lot of this thing that we call jiu-jitsu about shoes those you just bought anyway that was the site no anyway when you’re doing do do so of course you need a geek because you’re doing G and nogi so when you get your key what keys are we getting or even the best skis or we getting the drunkest skis we’re getting the best skis all right oh yeah big time Becky’s our origin geez you get them at origin mein kampf or that means dot-com there are all kinds of stuff all kinds of clothes including jeans if American which you know what even like not everyone does jiu-jitsu not everyone does Gita Jitsu but everyone does have jeans now let me ask you the same question you asked me what kind of jeans are we getting best kind not the junk is not the junk would you say junk is John Kista that’s not even a word is it it is not the junk is the kind it is if something is junk oh you know what it’s just one of those subtle differences in in in remember I told you in court in Hawaii they’re like subtle differences in words there are only small they’re pretty much the same but they’d sell them that is one of them like junk you got a little pigeon yeah as a little pigeon Liz it would be junk iasts right not junk yes exactly right so junk is the same as junky like it’s this it’s like in the mainland you say junky like it’s just more of a what do you call it like I’ve done a ver but um oh yeah yeah that that hamburgers real cheap it is real junky right so junk on the mainland the word junk is a noun it’s a junk it’s a piece of junk it’s a pile of junk it’s an era in Hawaii it’s a it’s adjective like it’s junk like that’s a way of describing it oh no no no see it sounded like a noun to you because you’re from the mainland if you say Jeff that’s why you can have words like it’s junker it’s way more junk wave we don’t want the jug cuz there’s such thing as junk junker and junk East in Hawaii in here it’s like no it’s just junk it’s either junk or it’s like not junk you don’t kind of thing come on now seems like I said these differences are subtle gonna follow though ya know cuz I thought of like if you went if I said hey what’s that stuff on the side of your house over there echo you’d be I go that’s just junk right a pilot that’s junk and I get what you mean by that it’s an old lawn chair it’s an old weed whacker that doesn’t work anymore right yeah a couple stuffed animals that no one wants the one that’s junk yes so what you’re saying is hey how’s that car that you just bought yeah how does it work how is it is that thing they don’t know is it dope you’re like it’s junk how was that movie last night kind of junk hmm yeah so I’m with in regards to jeans you don’t want the junk jeans or in your case the junkier junky esteems junk list is what you said her ass the whole Hawaii version Hawaii yes that’s how unless the best one get the origin jeans and whatever other clothes and don’t forget about supplements too supplements joint warfare krill oil discipline discipline go discipline go for when you need a little kick and and it’s interesting you and I have both morphed to a situation where discipline the drink is just the normal that’s just part of the world that’s just part of it yeah I am now drinking and this is the thing about discipline it doesn’t have 480 grams of or 480 milligrams of caffeine yeah in fact it has 15 grams per scoop this is not the crazy stimulant that’s like let’s face it jiu-jitsu you don’t want to be all amped up on caffeine going to jiu-jitsu class how do you get it that’s why discipline is so good pre-roll yep so that’s what I figured out now is if you have iced tea which I used to drink a lot of iced tea yeah drink jakka white tea right you you just drink that stuff right like think of when you were a kid all enough some iced tea that I caffeine in it right you weren’t freaking out that has been way more caffeine than discipline so what I’m saying is discipline is now just sort of a good to do just a day long like an all-day I must have had I must have had five bottles of discipline today dang okay yeah yes that’s more today because I’m sitting there drinking it you know I’m working yeah I’m writing I’m editing which is rich let’s face it like writing and editing sometimes is a real chore yeah mental chore there’s not fun yeah so you got to get eaten no game yeah that’s why I’ve been trained a lot have been disciplined lately a lot of writing a lot of mental thought yeah so anyways you don’t know the megamix for jujitsu is discipline mm-hmm okay water you can actually add like a look like a maybe like a third cup whatever the third of your mix total of like a cranberry juice or like um you can squeeze lemon juice in there or something okay water lemon juice discipline and on it has these like minerals and electrolytes mix one scoop of that boom that’s the jiu-jitsu megamix libretto bring you through go to do two scoops of discipline three if you want to get nuts mmm you gotta add more water you know and then you got that situation going or whatever spend times where I’ve made discipline shots okay like I like eggs okay you know what I’m heading to jiu-jitsu I’m gonna be there in three minutes oh yeah yeah I’m just up a little shot it’s got three scoops and it’s it’s like a shot yes I’ve done that before but that’s also why I meant discipline go yeah because this one glow is for those situations where you don’t want to drink a bunch but you just want that hitter yeah but the go the pill that that takes longer though right because not instance yeah the instant that’s why I taste it I’m like I don’t know half an hour forty minutes prior to yeah event situation evolution it’s like here they have loosed it mine I feel like is or it is straight up it’s like a routine you know like you sort of have a routine and class you know I got some routines yeah yeah the protocol comes into play like this you go boom okay I got you just at xx time right I leave the house at X time – whatever I drink the megamix x time – whatever – you know another 10 minutes so it’s like the the amount of time it takes to mix it on and just tell everyone when to drink it if they’re gonna roll or do something active oh the thing is I don’t saw 40 minutes my half an hour forty minutes half an hour I’m sorry 40 minutes mine as I leave the house so I’ll have mine cause that’s how long it take to get here between 15 and 20 minutes okay so what you don’t need it to kick in right when you get here cuz you can be chat with people for the first time hour yes it’s one of those things it’s not like there’s this little teeny tiny window of it working it’s in the in the system right you’re rolling around only oh yeah you don’t even really like feel it like we’re off or nothing like a coffee crash or nothing like that so I don’t know I just do it that way that’s been and it’s worth like man I won’t not do it that way yeah also don’t forget about milk which is if you need extra protein which you do you can get it from milk or if you just want a straight-up dessert you just have dessert and if you don’t think the strawberry milk tastes like dessert you’re wrong you know the strawberry milk is dessert get some and some of the other ones I’ve just had so much of them I’m just really stoked on a strawberry right now mint you know what it was your go-to peanut butter or is it mint mint but all the interchange for variety whatever that straw everyone came in thanks Brian for that by the way so it’s like okay you know strawberry Slater there’s a lot of height it’s strawberry cool I’m not the hugest like I like I like the strawberry I like it yeah but when there’s chocolate like why would you do strawberry you know if you have chocolate or whatever so I’m like but whatever let’s do it the strawberry was is so mix it up boom the same deal I didn’t want to like add extra stuff in there I just I wanted to raw a deal so I had regular milk and strawberry milk there are few types all about surprisingly surprisingly good meaning and I don’t you know that’s a general term surprisingly good or whatever to me the strawberry milk tastes closer to an actual strawberry milkshake the only difference that I could detect is that it’s not as like overtly sweet as like one from like a you know like you get a strawberry milkshake foot place you know it just wasn’t as sweet as that that’s it I don’t put another half a scoop in there and you’ll be in the zone you what so I implemented the that hater the real litmus test right soy what do you call unless the kids sit down I was like this is strawberry milk have some just a little thing so here’s how you do it you don’t say is it good is it not good because if they’re not into you want more you don’t even ask that we just wait so because if you ask a is it good or not good daily if they’re old enough they’ll tell you what you want to hear no bleak yeah good then they’ll go play or they won’t be into the tests at all which typically they’re not and they’ll just be like no it’s junk therefore you know in their mind he won’t give me any more or whatever you know you just don’t get an actual action and accurate reading so what you do see here you can have some of this that’s it so they tasted both of them wanted more mmm both of them that’s me yeah that’s what it is really good so and also don’t forget warn your kid milk that comes in strawberry and chocolate as well and it’s it’s it’s like legitimately good for your children so get it for him oh yeah also chocolatey yes chocolate some teeth called chocolatey yeah and it just is like drinking goodness that’s what it is like drinking victory drinking tastes like tastes like victory and it’s just goodness got antioxidants get you little gets you a little kicker certified organic tube by the way yeah yeah so that’s that really cool orgy mein kampf forgot to say that yes also taco has his own store taco store to go to Jocko store calm this is where you can get your discipline equals freedom shirts hoodies lightweight and heavyweight hats hats hmm no you know no heavy weight hats you know but you do have those trucker hats with what do you call it snapback or flex fit so some options there mmm anyway anyway you want to represent the path you can get something there rash goods as well jiu-jitsu or whatever you’re doing boom you can get a little shirt that says good on it that does not have my head on it which is a positive thing moving in a different direction more subtle direction I don’t necessarily agree because I think that the one with your hand on it is like has not very subtle bro does that’s not only at all but it does like now they both have their benefits because look when I wear the good one just just good I like the people who do say something they’re just kind of like oh yeah good good they’ll just say it you know but the one with your head they’ll either ask oh who’s that on your shirt like who is that usually it’s like I don’t know you know Winston Churchill is I don’t even wear a public figure in there so they’re wondering who is that and why that we got to do that the first thing that you know and I’ve overseen a Winston Churchill t-shirt when I’m glad that we got that going nonetheless or they’ll know who you are and they know that that’s what you say and they’ll be like you know what do you call it the book that when they know and you know in a feed yes exactly right so I did both hundred percent fun molest a lot of cool stuff on there if you uh if you like something get something as they say also subscribe to the podcast if you haven’t already on iTunes and stitcher and where ever you listen to podcast because a lot of places they’re trying to kind of change the landscape of podcast listening to by the way oh yeah yeah they want to charge money or something put it behind the firewall hey I think it’s pay well pay wall maybe the firewall to firewall the pay wall anyways we’re free we’re free free but nonetheless hey it is really you have to pay you know what you have to pay you have to listen to this part of the podcast you don’t actually even have to do it’s like one of those little trays don’t forget about the warrior kid podcast which is also not behind a paywall it’s free for your children if your kids want to learn how to be on the path your kids want to learn about Desa but if you kids want to learn how to handle bullying and trouble in school and trouble study if they want to learn handle all that stuff in life I mean if you want to get a little into cuz you know you need it and get some of that warrior kid podcast yeah that’s also Irish Oaks ranch calm this is where you can get weary kids so yeah which is not for kids yeah it’s actually Jocko soap made by a warrior kids is worried kids so called Jocko soap there’s another edition called trooper so or is it the trooper bar trooper Soper yeah nonetheless it’s today it’s good yeah yeah this is good so awesome yes it’ll help you stay clean it’ll make you stay clean mmm in a hardcore kind of way also youtube if you are interested in the video version of this podcast of Jocko telling us helping us advising us do you advise them just over here saying my point I guess more than anything else yeah and then and then echo makes videos that he’s super proud of and he’s all hype about and he thinks they’re super cool so you can check those out too yeah yeah there you go nonetheless yes YouTube jockle podcast YouTube channel yeah you have one so yeah we do have our own YouTube channel yes you can sign up for little announcements sure that come out no I have that so whenever you post a video I get a notification yeah and I go oh cool echo post a video should i watch it yeah and then I go down and read the comments it goes looking drew yeah so there that Beth comment in the world but yeah and then psychological warfare you can get that if you need a little little assistance during a challenging moment of weakness if you press play on your phone you can play a little track that will get you through that moment a weakness it’s on iTunes Google Play and B through platforms of all kinds and if you want a visual representation to help keep you on the path checkout flip side canvas dot-com where my brother Dakota Meyer is making art we pull a nose and he’s putting into the art with layers that’s what it is there you go you just you just going to use made the motto art with layers we’re gonna put some warrior kids stuff up on there for your kids rooms we’re gonna put some warrior kid things up there so be checking that out and if you have anything that you want to have on a canvas let Dakota Meyer know well I hit him up on Twitter tell him what’s going on tell me what you think he can make he can make it happen so there’s that also on it on it calm so this is where you can get your kettlebells when you’re when we are varying up our workouts need more kettlebells you need more functional fitness type stuff that’s where you get it also like I mentioned before the the mineral / electrolyte mix for the free jujitsu actually pre-workout to megamix this is where you get it on it calm / Yakko what if you I mean you don’t you know what a pre-workout is it’s called a pre-workout yeah it’s like it has like Faizal dilators and caffeine and stuff in it it’s mainly for like lift you know whatever you can mix that if you work out don’t do met Khan’s on this but if you just lift him for like I poured your fee or whatever and you like pre-workouts you mix that in the mega mix so you go pre-workout discipline two scoops one scoop electrolytes from on it lemon juice water mix that report back whoo that’s the mega mix right there for lift information measure your biceps report back yes yeah your pump will be out of this world but before jiu-jitsu don’t do the pre-workout don’t do the caffeine before that’s my thing anyway on it calm slash Douglas where you get it got some books got some books coming out I got one book coming out called or way the warrior kid three where there’s a will I think we’re in this podcast now we might even be live or close to it yeah so way the warrior kid three order it immediately I just got the numbers prior to walking in here it’s already selling like pretty awesome so appreciate everyone pre-ordering it but if you want it order it now so I can print enough for you because the publishing company is Darko publishing also we got–we the warrior kid one we got way the warrior kid to subtitle Mark’s mission way the quarry way the warrior kid one subtitle is from Wimpy to warrior the Navy SEAL way teacher kids be on the path of if you got a little bit younger kid get Mikey in the Dragons Mike in the Dragons will frame your child’s mind to be able to overcome fear for the rest of their lives just a nice little thing to give them for the rest of your life you don’t have to be afraid of anything yes there you go there you go child you’re welcome discipline equals freedom Field Manual that’s how to get after it the audio of that is on iTunes Amazon music Google Play another mp3 extreme ownership and dichotomy leadership both those books I wrote with my brother life Babin and we take the experiences we had in combat overseas the leadership lessons we learned and we pass them on to all of you also we have echelon front which is our leadership consultancy and what we do is we solve problems through leadership and if you want to have us come and work with your company and then go to a salon front comm if you want to come to a live experience you can come to the muster May 23rd and 24th of Chicago sold out you won’t be coming to that one September 19th and 20th in Denver not sold out yet but it will and December 4th and 5th in sydney australia go to extreme ownership calm all of them they’ve sold out all of them will sell out so get in the game early EF online this is our if you can’t make it to the muster but you want to get granular with your leadership capabilities then go to EF online com and we will take you through leadership courses that will pragmatically improve your leadership skills there’s interactive decisions you have to make in those courses so check it out EF online com and then EF overwatch if you are a business person and you are looking for leaders which is what you need in your company you need leadership if you want leadership in your company we have a special operations at combat aviation veterans and we are getting them placed into your company so go to EF overwatch if you are looking for leaders in your company and if you want to cruise hard more with us on the interwebs Twitter Instagram and on Facebook of course I’m at Echo Charles and chocolates at Jocko will Inc what are the three platforms Twitter Instagram and then Facebook oh thank you thank you I wasn’t quite sure what you said and thanks to everyone out there that wears the cloth of our nation a military uniform thank you for your sacrifice and thanks to you our families as well who also sacrifice to keep the nation safe and thanks to police law enforcement firefighters paramedics EMTs dispatchers correctional officers Border Patrol Secret Service all first responders for what you do every day and thanks to your families as well for supporting you so that you all can support us and everyone else out there remember that life goes by like a summer day and you don’t have time to get hung up on failures you don’t have time to dwell in the past and you can’t preserve the memories perfectly so make sure you get out there every day and you make new memories by moving forward and getting after it and until next time this is echo and Jocko out