that got me thinking about an article that I read about Anthony Bourdain and Anthony Bourdain obviously he was about as successful as as anyone could be I mean he was a successful guy in so many aspects and yet and yet he killed himself and I didn’t know him personally but you know he knew people that I know you know he was he was friends with Joe Rogan he was he was friends with Harley Flanagan he was friends with guys that guys that have really good guys and so in that way I kind of felt like I knew what kind of a guy he was at least and even from the outside even without having any connections to him at all he was the kind of guy that had just about everything that that that most people would want and even still I mean obviously that wasn’t enough well in the article that I read there was a quote from one of Anthony Bourdain’s books and the book was called a Cook’s Tour he said in this book I wanted adventures I wanted to go up the num river to the heart of darkness in Cambodia I wanted to ride out into a desert on Camelback sand and dunes in every direction eat whole roasted lamb with my fingers I wanted to kick snow off my boots in a Mafia nightclub in Russia I wanted to play with automatic weapons in pnom pen recapture the past in a small boy stur village in France step into a CD neon-lit boqueria in rural Mexico I wanted to run roadblocks in the middle of the night blowing past angry militia with a handful of hurled marlboro packs experience fear excitement wonder I wanted kicks the kind of melodramatic thrills and chills I’d yearned for since childhood the kind of adventure I’d found as a little boy in the pages of my Tintin comic books I wanted to see the world and I wanted the world to be just like the movies that’s what Anthony Bourdain said just like the movies but you know what to me the world is not like the movies the movies aren’t real they don’t exist but you do and life this life is it’s better than any movie there is movies are supposed to provoke emotion they’re supposed to make you feel something but I have a better idea go out into the world and actually feel it go feel joy and love and triumph and rapture and ecstasy and glory go feel those things and you know with those feelings there will be other feelings as well there’ll be sorrow and pain and sadness and desolation and suffering there’ll be all those feelings too but you know what that’s okay that’s okay take both sides feel all of it that’s what life is those feelings those emotions those eyes and those lows those are life and those emotions and those feelings are better than any movie because they are real so make your own comic book make your life your own movie but actually make it better than a movie not not better because it’s more adventurous or more romantic or more melodramatic make it better because it’s real it’s real so it is better and you know what real comes with some downsides real comes with some darkness but that’s okay it’s okay because when you know the darkness the light becomes even brighter so go out there move toward the light move toward the light and live live
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