Video URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRvTjDZJs6A
hello freak [ __ ] okay so first of all let's do rock paper scissor to see who goes first okay so you today ready I'll do the count you guys get your hands up ready one two three gotcha okay Burt one that one one two three okay even one two three gotcha Burt wins so would you like to go first would you like time to go first I'd like to weigh in first okay I'm just waiting thirsty okay so we're gonna move over to Tom's microphone over there so we'll be using that camera up here take your clothes off first of all you definitely want to take your clothes off this well I know it works oh I know but let's make sure we know exactly right because it may not be like my skill at home I'm always around 200 pounds 201 so I'm too old one with my clothes on which is like one night he's got a rubber suit on the whole deal okay so for folks that are just listening here we're in the studio here and Jamie is setting up the camera for you well point directly down to scale Burt is looking considerably slimmer considerably slimmer he's got multiple layers on and now he's down in the underwear which are probably wet he took the first layer of underwear off socks drumroll ladies and gentlemen pom pom pom pom pom pom pom pom he's drying himself off like a wrestling tournament Jesus Christ okay here we go below 227 everybody here we go Bert Kreischer called out Joe 221 holy [ __ ] holy [ __ ] oh no but it's right I checked my own way it's right this is what I use at home too but we can to 21 ladies and gentlemen holy [ __ ] [ __ ] was Tommy wasn't gonna take his shirt off for weigh-in he's got to now that shirt is precious ounces 221 my man went hard yes that's probably at least a few ounces that's a good watch it's a beautiful watch but I'm gonna make a drink oh you gonna drink while it's going on oh my goodness this is this is chaos here we go Tommy looking very slim – here we go ladies and gentlemen Wow [Applause] first of all congratulations to the both of you [ __ ] that is that's a gigantic we
got some coconut water if you want to get some electrolytes in you holy [ __ ] you guys want a coconut water no no good god you want coconut calories in this no no no no it's stevia it's it's called zbh like a soda holy [ __ ] Wow so those extra pounds like whatever you know you didn't drink water that all made up for it God ing father tomorrow of weight one victory well yeah hmm man let's sit down what's it now okay we go we got this out of the way oh my god so thirsty Wow so let's just cut the [ __ ] and get right to the way we're going right to the [ __ ] way I should weigh him first cuz I have a feeling that Jesus by the way we did the height tests because Ari Shaffir who was supposed to pay if they got below 227 are we supposed to pay for their trip the loser has to shave their beard and the loser has to pay for the winners trip of their choice unless they can get down to 227 in which Irish a fear agreed that he was gonna pay but now Ari is balking and he's saying that they have to be there their height has to be measured because the body mass index would indicate that they have to be a certain height or they're obese it was really weird so we tested the heights okay tom is just under six feet tall and for all you [ __ ] that say I'm five foot two we tested me too I'm 5/8 and a [ __ ] hair and Bert is taller than Tom so Bert's good you're about six one so the body mass index I think dude you look good get on here get on here all right so Bert was at 221 yesterday you look significantly thinner today okay he's hurting let's see he's getting on the scale 220 220 for Bert 400 pounds one pound less one [ __ ] pound I think Tommy's got it here let's see here [ __ ] say goodbye to my beard you [Laughter] [ __ ] do 16 Tom gets it running away ladies and gentlemen we have a winner in the hash tag who is fat contest the winner is Tom Segura down to 216 [ __ ] pounds outrageous outrageous coconut waters c2o coconut waters must be consumed now get those electrolytes in your system boys well done well done
amazing effort it's not easy to lose weight it's really not easy to lose it the way you guys did it two days in a row man crazy [ __ ] that was that without yet today was the hardest workout I've ever had eight miles lost one [ __ ] pound that's crazy it I think my body was like in shock that's what happens that's what happens of Fighters it shuts down so have a seat hmm I've been thinking about that drink this entire [ __ ] day trimmer over there charging it up should probably shave your beard after you have some pizza yeah I mean have a little hard time eating pizza with this fat [ __ ] face it's not gonna look good yeah you look pretty [ __ ] skinny today man you did you do look significantly skinny too skinnier today I don't know man I think you a little distended yesterday with that pulled pork in your stomach from the night before seriously [Laughter] what it's that long strand DNA I have that man today you know it's so funny you three he said something in passing and that's what I did what but I just didn't acknowledge it he goes uh she'll go to Burke Williams you just sweat it out in the spa that's what I've been doing for two days Nick I just can't today I just can I flew it today and then [ __ ] go to Berkeley I'll sweat it out hey feelin bro I want to give a shout-out to God without him and nothing's none this is possible and then Jake Smith Thank You Jake who's Jake he's a fighter who gave me all this insight on shout-out to anybody oh my god can you do this [Applause] [Music] [Applause] [Music]