Video URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i_HqR46dU_8
hey freak [ __ ] we're back this episode of The Joe ran experience broadcast is brought to you by stamps.com if you run a small business out of your house the last thing you want to do is [ __ ] measure [ __ ] and weigh it at the post office Good googly moogly Joey Diaz good googly moly you don't want to be in that [ __ ] line talking to some person who doesn't want to talk to you waiting and waiting while some [ __ ] in front of you is trying to buy stamps trust me do this [ __ ] on your own computer it's way easier you do it all print it out you measure it yourself they give you a scale it's a sweet deal if you click on the old schooly looking microphone in the upper right hand corner and you use the code word JRE get this special offer no risk trial plus $110 bonus offer including a digital scale and up to $50 $ 5 of free postage it's an excellent service one that Brian Redban himself uses when he sends out those Kitty Cat t-shirts it makes it so a person can actually run a business from your house with no [ __ ] so go to stamps.com use the code word JRE and get your super sweet offer you sexy [ __ ] which includes a digital scale and up to $55 so free postage that's stamps.com and the code word is JRE we're also brought to you by audible.com the best resource on the internet if you're looking for audio entertainment whether it's books or radio shows like the Opie and Anthony show I believe they have some podcasts on there as well they we thought they had Dan Carlin's podcast but we were mistaken when I talked to Dan about it he's like no you're just making that [ __ ] up I love that guy what a great guy yeah he's a great guy if you listen to his podcast you'll like him even more once you listen to the podcast then you really like the guy because you're like oh this [ __ ] this guy's like he's making a masterpiece he's you know what we're doing is just sitting around talking [ __ ] and uh I appreciate that you guys enjoy it but the amount of effort that goes into doing one of these it's it's you know it's so tiny compared to what he's doing he's essentially doing a real audio book every time he releases a podcast so it takes a few weeks to put each one out but they're masterpieces and he's so dramatic like
it makes uh it makes listening to his exciting um but there's a lot of [ __ ] cool books that they have on audible.com there's a a pleora over a 100,000 different titles they even have stand-up comedy uh I know they have some of my [ __ ] up there uh it's a a sweet what is that Enders Game yeah who's uh what book is that what is that I've heard of this before it's uh it's it's the war with like in like 100 years into the future it's really good it's uh 20 it's 20 years old is it really huh 20 years ago was not that long ago how weird is that movie coming out about it I used to think 20 years ago was like God it was so long ago remember when you were a kid you thought God 20 years ago it was the 1960s what the [ __ ] you know how ridiculous is that and then you realize oh that [ __ ] happens rather quick yeah which is really weird when you wrap your head around it you think from 1950 to 2013 how different [ __ ] is but it's only you know 63 years August is almost over doesn't it seem like it was just August dude time fine so this Ender Game this they're making into a book uh this is a audible book off but they're also making it into movie EXC me making it into a movie yeah well the the beautiful thing about audible is for [ __ ] traffic and if you're on a plane or something like that if you don't want to listen to a podcast if you don't want to listen to us this is a great way to go and over 100,000 different titles and if you go to audible.com um you can what is the [ __ ] hold on a second I think there's like a new thing we have to say with audible oh no which one is no it's Squarespace Squarespace is the confusing one cuz they want the number afterwards they want Joe 8 to track the months yeah I think audible.com you just go to audible.com Chow you get yeah that's all it is and you get one free audio book and 30 free days of service it's a sweet deal and uh as far as like a resource of of information of uh of cool audiobooks nothing can [ __ ] with audible it's an amazing site they also support standup comedy they even had a live thing where they were doing every week people would do like a new five minutes and [ __ ] didn't really work out because that's a lot of [ __ ] time to come up with in Five Weeks people don't like to think
that but to have like a rock solid five new minutes every week that you're really proud of that You' want to put online wow that's hard yeah so Steve marmell was doing that he was doing that every week I remember they uh they had a contract with him and a couple other dudes you know marel is real topical so he was like uh trying to like just constantly write topical jokes about funny [ __ ] that's happening in the news would have you but it was uh it's [ __ ] brutal that's a lot of that's a lot of time that's too hard to do you mean you could do it but man you got to be on the ball every day if if you want it to really truly represent you so I think they stopped doing that but they have Earth by John Stewart um does John Stewart read it he's got to read it you can't have somebody else read it scroll back up not that one is that um God know pen Gillette does he read his own oh let's see that that would be great one of course he did yeah of course he did why did you even ask Sarah silver man [ __ ] destroyed on the roast Jesus CH oh she's hilarious man she's hilarious and she reads her own [ __ ] too she's a very funny person she's in my opinion like as far as like uh chick standups and I hate to break them up into chicks but I'm going to do it anyway you know she's like top two three all time you know what what women have been like I mean and I know a lot of people say what about Lucio ball she's more of a comedic actress you know and as far as standups I think Joan Rivers is the queen I think I don't think you can [ __ ] with Joan Rivers she's been funny for like 80 years you can't [ __ ] with her she's number one women of all time Joan Rivers and then you got like the Paula pound stones and you got like uh Roseanne B Roseanne Bar who's a Crusher I just heard amazing interview with her on Ron and Fez the other day real deal she you know what she's my her and Joan Rivers man that's actually kind of close when you think about that she's a beast we got to get Rosie she's [ __ ] funny man funny she was in the'80s I remember she was funny like the best guys in the world were funny you know I mean she was a killer she didn't give a [ __ ] and then when they gave her a TV show she gave less [ __ ] she's a beast she was talking about how she like her first show or First comedy show in La like she had
only been doing I think comedy like two years about MSY loved her and that that same uh show like her first night in La night show yeah she booked The Tonight Show in the first night that is insane insane we got to get her on the podcast I talked to her uh like she was uh thinking about stopping by her San Diego show in ComicCon of this so you chat with her yeah on Twitter she follows me well she follows me on Twitter like she she asked me questions sometimes she's all in like New World Order type [ __ ] imagine smok weed with her having her on podcast dud be amazing just let tape it even if you can't watch it look I I did Ros o' donnal show just to meet Rosie I really did I I think she's badass I like her whether I agree with what she says about things or not I think Rosie's got some balls and she doesn't seem like an [ __ ] to me at all no when they had that show on VH1 with the badge the standup badge that the host quit and Rosie took over that was when she was a strong ass woman and and the girl you like dog she rips up some [ __ ] stages too what's the chick on Channel 5 every day the one that's seen you at the bus stop channel five The lesbian chick that on the bus stop you went on her show the other day you were looking for tickets oh you're talking about that chick Ellen degenerous Ellen degenerous used to rip it up her [ __ ] there a couple [ __ ] that ripped it up Paul P ripped it up the chick from The Comedy Store the one that was in with the with them they smoked the joint with the chick with the [ __ ] big tits Lily Tomlin she used to rip up the [ __ ] store she had like she do like more of a theatrical like a one woman show but I I think you know in my opinion Sarah Silverman's right up there I think she's one of top let's go it's rivers with a strong Rosanne kicking the [ __ ] I know man Rosanne might have been better like as her delivery man no it's [ __ ] hard dude it's very hard because John Rivers is still out there swinging so in my opinion like you got to give her number one because she's still swinging you know she's still out there doing concert when they asked her she dog when they asked her if she was on the wrestler is one of the funniest things i' ever heard
one of the RO she's pretty gangster they asked if she was in a wrestler I almost [ __ ] died when I heard I think um I think it's harder for a woman to do stand up I've always said this I think that men are sexist for the most part and they don't want to listen to a woman talk you know I think it's harder to get a lot of men's attention and obviously that's a big generalization because there's a lot of Sarah Silverman fans from men or a lot of women fans of Comedy they're men but I cheer for women they're featuring I cheer for women when they're featuring and I love [ __ ] who go on stage headlining and think they're going to follow a woman on a Saturday night your [ __ ] better be tight because if this chick decides to go up there and [ __ ] goes her way remember that that's half women [ __ ] goes her way you're going to have a rough time and I've seen it happen bro I've seen a bury [ __ ] with ego at the store don't [ __ ] around with women sometimes I've seen shanat Asberry [ __ ] in the o yeah I've seen her bury [ __ ] in the O there's a lot of women who will take that room and flip you they don't have titties they don't give a [ __ ] they look like they've been [ __ ] in the ass a thousand times and they go up there with that attitude and you're sitting there going wow what was the Puerto Rican chick at the store early on that married what's his name that she had the kid with what's his name and she did a couple episodes NYPD Blue and she was on her way I saw her in there a couple Tuesday nights that I was was like damn this [ __ ] if she was on the road for a few years she had a kid by that time she had the kid she'd sit the kid in the [ __ ] bar at The Comedy Store and go do 15 minutes well I think I told you that like one of the most promising sets of an open micer I ever saw was Kelly Kon Kelly kson absolutely dude let me tell you something Kelly Kiren Kelly Kiren especially when she didn't have a boyfriend she's a sweetie and she you know she get a boyfriend she'd calm down but when she didn't have a boyfriend she was [ __ ] angry she did this bit man she did this bit I wish I was a man you know Kell's like I'm short I'm 5'8 and she's at least 5 Ines taller than me right I mean how tall is she she's 6'1 62 yeah I would say 61 she a very tall
girl and and she get [ __ ] angry and she's like real physical and like she would do she did this bit I wish I was a man if I was a man I'd come in chicks and go [ __ ] you have my kid she goes if I was a man she goes if I had a dick I'd kick old ladies in the traffic and it's like this really wild bit and I was an open mic or she was an open mic rather I mean she was just starting out I was like wow I was like this chick is she's [ __ ] strong you saw it that the chicks that went through the comedy store either had to sit or get off the [ __ ] pot they only had about three or four weeks though to adjust to that style of comedy and you would see them go away on their own because it's six guys before you and you got to go up there with your little quaint material at 1045 you had about three or four those sets until it got back to mity so now what you had to do is go in there and go you know what I got to use my [ __ ] and go in there and throw some [ __ ] heat and throw some steam and that's either do or die at the store even Sher Shepard I remember Sher Shepard used to come in early on oh yeah uh what was the the cute black girl that had the white boyfriend manager God damn it and then you had lamear that was all stitched up and plastic surgery up and [ __ ] that were holding it together with crazy glue and I remember a comic that used to go to the Laugh Factory she was asking me about the store like you know like when should I go up like when is the crowd like the nicest I'm like it's like stop I was like end this conversation right now you don't know what you're talking about you're talking about chaos audible.com go to audible go buy yourself some cool [ __ ] there's a lot of books like I said Sarah Silverman's book and that's a good one get go get that one get it for free audible.com Joo do you know her manager have you ever met Sarah silver Silverman's manager which one's your manager some lady who was amazing and she was so [ __ ] badass she just like coming up to guys and go better not [ __ ] with Tony if you [ __ ] with Tony like like it was intense she was amazing what was that about uh there I think Tony's manage managers were there and so she just came up and started like just just screaming at these two guys it was so awesome to and
and then I was like who who was that girl you know and he goes oh that's s Silver's manager I was like that's badass she's a badass all right we're also brought to you by on it.com and we do have a new thing at on it we have an orangutang kettle bell now the rangan kettle bell is uh it's like 50 something pounds they they they insist on doing them in puds holy [ __ ] one p and two pood it's pretty badass yeah so now we have the orangutang that goes along with the chimp and the gorilla the orangutang being the 1.5 pood which I think is 50 52 PBS or something like that or 50 pounds what why are you doing it with P I don't know why I don't know why they did that like what is a PUD man old piece of Po it's it's to show we're legit bro yeah I think we're really [ __ ] up there Aubrey let's put the goddamn weight to these things yeah it's like [ __ ] like kilos and [ __ ] yeah why do we have to have inside [ __ ] secret [ __ ] like a PO I don't even know what a PO is and I sell these things why don't you do it by ounces that would be cooler I work out with these [ __ ] every day and I don't know what a [ __ ] po is what's a PO goddamn it but well what they are these Primal Bells go to audible.com or on it do [ __ ] krc.com uh kettlebells audit.com kettlebells and you'll see the regular kettle bells which we uh we sell but uh the new ones are the Primal bells and if you go to on it.com for Primal Das Bells you'll see these and um that's the rang tank they're not as threatening looking they have like a big mushy face yeah yeah like the fat guy in Blade the bed remember the fat guy in Blade Eric Griffin what's his name Eric it's really amazing artwork too if you see it with the black contrast too you can see how really how good the artwork is it's inredible I mean these uh these are some of the as far as like idea to uh to actual product when we came up with this idea and then like seeing them now the the difference is it's perfect the [ __ ] gorilla is amazing man I can't help but look at that thing it's look at that Joey look at that gorilla that shit's incredible I mean look at that thing look at the [ __ ] artwork on that just look like what the [ __ ] it's so badass and they're really well
balanced as well it's one of the most important things about doing this uh Primal Bell thing is that we wanted to make sure that if we had these gigantic kettle bells um we would even though they have this beautiful artwork on them we wanted to make sure they're balanced so what's the lightest One Way 35 PBS one poo one poo and that's the one they have yeah there 30 35 lbs uh 1.5 which whatever and uh and then there's the gorilla which is uh two which is 70 you think they are doing the PO because it's like monkey poo yeah no cuz they're being silly yeah they're being they're being like that's what it is traditional probably I didn't even think about it until today it's cuz I'm high as Fu I see things clearly when I'm really high I see things clearly it's very important um yeah so anyway go there go there and check that [ __ ] out have some uh get yourself some hemp Force protein get yourself some uh all kinds of battle ropes and weight vests and steel Maes anything you need as far as like strength and conditioning if you're trying to tell people you train UFC yeah UFC that [ __ ] they do on all access it's me bro I got [ __ ] ropes in my yard I'm swinging around a mace it's like old school if we we go back to sword fight and I'm prepared uh we also sell Buffalo bars they're called Tonka bars them [ __ ] is delicious they're made the way the uh the uh Native Americans used to make them as well with these cranberries and buffalo meat Buffalo's super good for you and delicious and buffalo are big so if you shoot them you're likely to hit them it's easier to farm him that way Joey Diaz what you bother me for [ __ ] what you bother me for anyway on it.com use a code name Rogan you'll save 10% off any and all supplements oh and I need to say about this orangutang thing um we're going to uh we're donating money for each uh Primal Bell uh each purchase donates $5 to save the red ape um so uh the uh is rangy charity organization so whatever this organ A's call that's un it's unclear here on this email I'll just read it what it says and you'll we'll we'll figure it out together it says we launched the rangang Primal Bell and have linked it to an orangutang charity organization every purchase
donates $5 to save the red ape I don't know if save the red ape is the name of the organization or there's an organization that's not named that's unclear to me in that statement so I'll just be clear about that but the idea is that every for every one of these rank T kettle bells we sell five bucks will go to uh whatever this charity is so I guess the rang tanks are endangered save me they're [ __ ] weird looking man I mean they really do look like something out of avatar look at that thing that's a real animal how weird is that God damn it an intelligent looking thing with this [ __ ] crazy face save please stop shut that off I don't want listen I don't want to focus on that at all okay uh anyway rang Tang U kettle bells in on it.com use a code named Rogan say 10% off any and all supplements Joey Diaz is here ladies and gentlemen that's right that's right suck it start it up here we go let's get this going The Joe Rogan Experience Train by day Joe Rogan podcast by night all [Music] day ladies and gentlemen Joey [ __ ] Diaz fresh off the road killing them in DC taking it nationwide Joey Diaz no longer stationary constantly on the move now got no choice brother you're on the Move dog got no choice and then we we're going to Milwaukee and I'm [ __ ] excited I'm going to get some good spaghetti yeah a good Italian neighborhood over there you're killing them out there man you're killing them we're trying brother you know this was the plan 12 years ago and finally you know it ain't no listen man when you you're there and you put the work in it becomes easy and you're enjoying it yeah you can't wait to [ __ ] stay you can't wait to go out and try that new joke anymore that new delivery you know you're a black belt in comedy yeah it's a fun thing to do now yeah very fun you know uh it's funny because I went from the two [ __ ] tremendous shows we did in Boston which those are amazing listen man you don't ever want a bomb in Boston for me that's the end of everything that's AOS Smith that's that's Dane Cook that's a lot of f Lenny Clark there's so much tradition I remember the first time I played andova to me I went to the store that like a all those guys from Boston what was the the taekwan do guy that also had
sleep apia all you little Rodriguez no no no were comedian from Boston he had long hair and he'd play a character oh yeah God damn it man those guys got what the [ __ ] is his name oh my God he going to kill me I'm sorry yeah they were all your buddies and they were like dog you ever played Boston I'm like no they like we'll get you in there so they would got me into the comedy connection on Mondays the open mic with uh the kid who died Kevin Fitzgerald or whatever his name was Kevin Fitzgerald's in Denver Kevin he was friends with our friend Maguire Mutual buddy he died of cancer Kevin Knox yeah Kevin Knox on Mondays they introduced me to him so I became a part of this thing I would do andova the Aku Aku and I was never good enough to play Boston I would get to do the connection on Monday nights and that's like having a [ __ ] stripe in comedy when you get to play Boston and they accept you into that Community yeah so I knew before I went to Boston that week I did as many sets as I could to tighten my [ __ ] up we didn't go to Boston unprepared it was me you and Ari you know I mean it was just a [ __ ] perfect night it was funny how the next day I had to go to a summer jam up in San Jose with Russell Peters who was a pleasure to [ __ ] see and Angela Johnson and all those guys and I didn't really get across I was I was burnt out from the Boston shows like I put all the energy I had to those two [ __ ] shows the will Beed it which was great it was a great thing that I left and CH son and won and fox won [ __ ] Sports the whole thing but we going to do the dude's name was Dom wasn't it hit me what was his last name God damn it it's trying being crazy Dominic he just hit me up and you up about sleep apnea he wanted to go take a test about a year ago I can't believe I can't remember his name I ran out of room I ran out of room for names Jo it's no disrespect people don't understand that and the attorney that was the the the Dominic fig Dominic fig what what was the nice gay kid I was so worried I was going to not remember his name was the nice gay kid that went to Chris McGuire's house to eat dinner and your name came up and there was two gay guys at the table and they go he doesn't like Joe Rogan he goes why not he goes he called Princess Diana [ __ ] they and they all
went they all went oh my God it was horrible that's hilarious those were great times when those guys from Boston took me and they would take me up there so then I went to San Jose then I went to DC and that was really the first time I used to do like Headliners and Tyson's Corner for years I used to fly into dullis this is the first time I was in the city and it was an experience because I tell you what if I would have gone five years ago guys I would have bomb this weekend really why you say that because I learned how to control more you know you learn and com you know it's so funny how we put ourselves out there where you never did I didn't have a choice they would tell me to ask me to headline I would go up there with stupid [ __ ] jokes and you would headline and you'd have the time but you really you weren't really a headliner and it's true when people start to come to see you it makes you work a little harder like every time you see them you want to have new material or a new Flow To You So I had never been there and I and I sharpened up this week and I went there and I tell you they were very politically correct yeah the city of DC downtown hey man it's a nation's [ __ ] Capital you know what I'm saying I'm talking about weed under my nuts and you know you can't do that but they took the ride and and and as far as the club the [ __ ] DC Improv is tits the staff the [ __ ] the the Spanish BL penders I mean the whole [ __ ] deal is just a great little Club I had the burrito one night uh just the whole experience the city of Washington DC I had the best chicken teriyaki and white tuna I've had the last 20 [ __ ] years I've done uh theaters there before um like a couple different times but I had never did The Improv before recently I did it with yeah I just stopped in go back let's go back and do a week three nights you know two there you want to go back there yeah yeah let's go back and we had a lot of good people there I went to a lot of places here with dead Squad usually doesn't go I tell you what place really blew my [ __ ] mind who they're ready to kill people where Salt Lake City really the Mormons are ready dog they ain't [ __ ] around uh Louisville Kentucky they're ready they'll come down no I went to Lexington the home of
University in Kentucky great Su I had a great summer going to these places that were Oddball but I wanted to see what was out there who was listening to the [ __ ] pop people were driving six seven hours people driving six seven I did that uh the Louisville Place tremendous yeah with seura no with Duncan tremendous maybe I did it with seura too yeah seura too I think I did one night in a weekend or something like that I'm going back to Nashville this year I can't wait oh Nashville's great Nashville's great is Utah really that crazy like is I mean like are people crazy out there I mean like the people out there they're coming I'm thinking of oh you what you mean is like are they like crazy Mormon yeah I mean there yeah but that's more Joe did you see this map it's kind of like what you've talked about it's U of all the porn searches that they just released PornHub did it and of course what you used to always say the South ebony was it's all ebony but uh Utah blank and somebody uh people are saying it's because child porn is the number one what search well UT Utah is blank that's weird it's like one of the few States where there's no downloads of porn right wow look at Maine look at look at like Vermont yeah they just gave up Asian California uh I don't know what Anita Queen is do you know what Anita Queen is no never even heard of that what what is this website that you're going to this is Gizmodo and it's based off statistics given by PornHub cream pie is Florida teen is Texas uh what's that noise you not hearing that no hear some crazy feedback uh cream pie was a lot more popular than imagined but uh cream pie is like number one yeah I think cream pie is probably number one and teen probably number well because people like to come into people yeah cre pie no like most most of them are cream pies well that's what people like I think let me look at this need to [ __ ] I don't know what the map looks like you know like I heard that Al Franken can draw the map like you could get Al Franken up to a chalkboard and he could just draw the map for you and I was kind of like sad cuz I was like um I can't I can yeah I have no idea where you I'm looking at these things okay cuz it's just cream pie cream pie they like like listing Texas's teen which is
[ __ ] creepy man that shit's creepy Ohio's mil cream pie so I not just cream pie it's old cream pie yeah this is this is weird man it's weird how California's dominated by Asian look at that number one Asian boom of course head of the times and the average visits well I don't understand that do you get that average number of visits duration so the duration the average for the people in California was like on the darker end but not as dark as [ __ ] like look at Georgia yeah and it's teen yep ebony has the longest so you could go into a store and say I want teen porn and they'll sell it to you like two kids [ __ ] like it's like no they're like 18 or 19 or something like that and that's the idea but you go to and get like Asian porn like a white dude [ __ ] the Chinese chick oh yeah online you get that stuff yeah yeah you're saying it's like that's impossible that's like so standard there's it's weird how there's like standard like categories of porn you know like DP like that's a category what's DP double penetration that's like normal we're like one's the ass one's in the vagina it's so P it's so P that it's a it's its own category it's like not just once not just a couple crazy people got together one in her ass and one in the vagina yeah double P right her ass like that together Hey listen if you're a chick and you love dick tell me that wouldn't be amazing no it would no would the problem is that it's on video and everyone's going to know but but the reality if you're a girl if you like anal sex I don't know if girls like it but if you do like it and then you like I mean it's but if you do like it and you like it in your box as well I mean take away Society standards and that would be like super awesome if you had like Ashton Kutcher in your butt and Brad Pit in your box I mean if you were a gal you'd be so happy but it would be like you know Ashton get out of there you're gobbling it all up save me some why would you want that's not wouldn't you rather have Brad Pit in there why you share it with Ashton well because you're a freak and you want it all she has no limitations to a freakness I I have no idea what this Anita porn is like when I when when I Google like that once uh state was uh
uh Nevada it's just Anita Queen is what the kind of porn is called I can't figure out what it is Anita Queen what you I don't know understand a word of what you're saying say so like uh see here this uh Asian is California Anita Queen is the the oh that's the style of porn St yeah and when I look it up it looks like it's like pageant porn or something what I don't know oh that actually is interesting if that was a category of like you've won the pageant I'll suck it you dirty [ __ ] like yeah you got the queen you took down the number one gal no that's a weird thing isn't it that's weird what's the categories are weird like that some dudes like only jerk off to anal they just like they can't we see more butt porn yeah puty what you're not supposed to woo you know like what the [ __ ] man it's it's weird how that's actually like a category yeah I find myself going into weird categories a lot lately just to mix it up kind of like when you drink the same alcohol for so long you're like I I'm going try something different I've been like black chicks getting [ __ ] by big white guys is there a lot of that yeah there's tons of that so black chicks getting dominated by white guys with big dicks yeah huge dicks so it's like some like look at this black guy yeah in your face buddy yeah look at my giant white pecker then have have them sprint to the girl how about that the first guy who gets there gets to [ __ ] be a bunch of white guys jacking off going oh come on come on black did you hear this the sex industries closed down because of AIDS again I hear about that and the chick that that that boner guy uh that chick that did a porn with Weiner Anthony Weiner was a politician yeah she actually uh did a movie with a guy that has yeah I read that she did a move well the guy was exposed to HIV he had sex with the girl who had contacted HIV he had sex with her but allegedly from what I've read it's not that easy to transmit from HIV from a woman to a man that it's much easier for a man to a woman because of the man injects fluids into the body so I don't know if that's true though obviously I'm not a doctor but like uh Tommy Morrison is uh is supposedly like really sick with AIDS now like he has full-blown AIDS and they did a story about it recently somebody posted it on
the Underground and it was it's really [ __ ] sad I mean he's dying he's on like life support system essentially he has full-blown AIDS you know and he they say he got it from a girl you know I mean I it might be possible I do not know you know I've heard like obviously that's what you always hear it's not possible for a guy to get it from a girl you always hear that but I don't know if that's I don't think he did anything else unless he put it got it from a needle he could have got it from a needle needle that's the obvious [ __ ] Choice well we were talking about that uh yesterday with uh dway Dwayne lwig we were talking about Fighters and pills and uh pain relief and you know [ __ ] what leave Rel pain better than heroin I mean is there anything right so for a lot of Fighters they might have start shooting up because the the heroin like relieving the pain for them was uh was so effective want to do it that way those opiates you know that's what it's that's what it's about getting used to needles in general well you know what if you're a fighter and you know you're used to getting punched in the face and getting your face stitched up and mean just that's like needles are not going to freak you out you ain't worried about [ __ ] needles when Stitch is putting your nose back together in the second round and you're going back out to the fight another two [ __ ] rounds or three [ __ ] rounds yeah you do [ __ ] five rounds with Ray Mercer and get koed into the ropes like he did did you ever see that no Tommy Morrison getting knocked out by Ray Mercer is one of the most frightening Knockouts I've ever seen in my life because well first of all was frightening cuz Ray Mercer was a murderous puncher but it was hilarious for me because I had this friend that would always root for white guys it would [ __ ] all he would he wanted white guys to win boxing matches so bad he never wanted it to be the best fighter he always wanted it to be the white fighter so like he rooted for Jerry Cooney and so he got hit here and Ry marer just unloads on him and he gets caught in the ropes though look at this like he's caught in the ropes and Ry Mar is teeing off him that's terrible quality is there a better quality version of that we could see it's smooth
cuz it was all so choppy but anyway the it was a frightening frightening knockout but once you've done that you could shoot heroin and that's 235 yeah listen bro that that once you have that pain and that pain doesn't [ __ ] go away and that little needle knocks it away listen to all those people stories that's how it started you know that's how it started and all sudden a rookies behind you to take your [ __ ] job in football you just bought your [ __ ] girl a house and a boat and you bought your parents boat and now you're 28 and a 22y old All American is coming in in front of you and you got a bit a little bit of knee pain and if you complain about it then you have surgery and you're out and then this [ __ ] steals your job what were you going to do you ain't got time you do what you need to do shoot the quar Zone shoot the [ __ ] DEA shoot the mecca shoot it all I don't give a [ __ ] as long as I play at the end of the season we'll talk about surgery then guess what DG at the end of surgery they meet a [ __ ] Guru who says you don't need surgery we're going to shoot this in you and that's it Ray Mercer was a [ __ ] murderous puncher back then this one right here watching that right there all of them dude all of them yeah the one the left that stiffened him and the right that put him down and then he hit him two more times full clip after that watch that one more time just the finishing blows cuz I'm Ser it's one of the most devastating Knockouts I've ever seen man if you saw this on TV when was this 70s late 70s early 80s uh 80s yeah here's that right hand and Bray Mercer was a [ __ ] killer and he could take it too man ray could take it look at these shots bing bang boom bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam bam and two more before he goes down look how many times he [ __ ] hit him G those punches D he got punched with a you're not even joking though it might have [ __ ] that was it he just got AIDS like something he didn't get brain damage got everything who knows how he got it he must ate sushi that afternoon and H the head real hard that night could not that's not good for your house no that [ __ ] him up that was it they did the movie with Stallone and he was done DG yeah you know there's some sort of a uh he did
the movie with Stallone after that didn't he before or after that I think it was before that before that right that sent him over the [ __ ] top the wrong guy I was like give a Puerto Rican a check on the fifth though you know what I'm saying what's too early right yeah no they sent him over the top though could you imagine being a [ __ ] guy who gets to play tommy gun back in the day he Pro I mean how do you does anybody rock yeah you're a young I'm playing a guy that Rocky took in with a [ __ ] he was it was a horrible [ __ ] what was the guy that what was the black guy in that movie who's the big black guy that did all those uh movies and that did who was uh Tyson's manager that robbed him Don King Don King remember the Don King in that movie he was the worst come on Tommy come with me and a limo we got whiske we got whiskey and white women Tommy just got punched in the head with Ray Mercy what are you going to do you're going to stand there next to Sylvester [ __ ] no no I think that was remember he was doing blow in the limo get that scene up get that scene up when he's doing blow in the limo she's got those little white milky titties he's going [ __ ] bananas Rocky's like what about what I T you [ __ ] you [ __ ] this [ __ ] is banging it must be incredibly hard to keep your motivation to be a fighter when that happens because a fighter that's like the opposite world of being a fighter like you're in a gigantic Blockbuster you're in a Rocky movie back when it means something to be in a Rocky movie you know if you're in like Rocky like if you're in Rocky today that's what I do it's all I've ever done did did you see Rocky B bboa the last one no no no hey man if you're into Rocky movies it's not bad this the final scene with Rocky and oh this is great in Spanish and Tommy Morris and him square off and there's the shitty D King look how big his small his head is oh Rocky punched him a bunch of times in the back of the head wow and knocked him down Tommy's really upset oh wow he threw at him and Rocky hit him on the way in incredible fight here wow Rocky took his legs out he's going MMA no ground impound though uhoh now Tommy's coming back boy that looks fake holy [ __ ] that looks
fake that looks so fake it should be illegal that look so fake they gave him 20 million that's how [ __ ] fake so imagine that [ __ ] oh he probably made at least 20 million from this movie this a huge movie man he look at this here's the finish one giant left hook and he drop Don King look at Don King you hit me I sue you so that's a digital signal that we're allowed to use the Spanish version yeah we can get away with that yeah you just got to get the brain juice [ __ ] up so I I found the map of the US and I didn't know where a lot of was I didn't know where a lot of [ __ ] was in in the uh in the weird areas like the the Maine and New Hampshire areas so hold Joe Roger look at me Joe R look at me quit quick what's the Six States in New England uh New Hampshire Connecticut Rhode Island Vermont Massachusetts that's it Massachusetts Connecticut island island Connecticut Marley from Maine did I not put Maine I forgot Maine I don't know is Maine New England it must be yeah main new Eng Main's got to be New England yeah okay so I forgot that and New Hampshire's New England too no yes sir those are States cities how dare you New Hampshire is where you don't know you really are a baby New Hampshire is where if you don't live close to B if you don't live close to Boston you fly into New Hampshire and the [ __ ] flights are dirt cheap it's like two different [ __ ] worlds to fly into New Hampshire and to fly into Boston at 45 it's like bird Bank LAX new is filled with a lot of [ __ ] people that don't want to hear the government's [ __ ] they're all like those Live Free or Die folks they you know they have compounds set up that's on their license plate Live Free or Die that's a gangster State you know they're like up there too where you got to like shoot moose to stay alive when you're North of Boston you're a silly [ __ ] okay what that's what that's not cold enough for you you need to go further CU When we would do gigs in Maine I'd be like oh my God it's colder like we'd be in Boston and we'd go to Maine to do a gig in December it it' be 10° cold you get out of the car I can't believe these [ __ ] live where it's colder than where we live you ever been somewhere where you look up and you go
how the [ __ ] do people live here and you make like a mental note like this is the coldest I've ever been January 5th 199 [ __ ] five they took me up from Denver Colorado I was living in Boulder to do a gig in Cheyenne Wyoming Joe Rogan sh it had to be 35 [ __ ] below with the windshield I left the hotel and I asked the guy at the [ __ ] thing where do you get something to eat and he looked at me and he goes maybe 50 yards down but I wouldn't leave if I was you and I looked at him like [ __ ] and I went out there and started walking and like 25 minutes in I was like it's too cold to walk there and if I get there it's going to definitely be too cold to come back wow like that's how and I walked and I had chili and I mean it was horrendous I had take jacket off and they had to sit next to the heater and that's that was something that uh we forget about that we don't have to deal with that [ __ ] here $350 I got for that gig as a feature act for four shows that's a good gig in those days yes it was that's a good gig yes it was I remember the uh I just got an email from John Schuler I got I gotta email him back I just remembered but I used to do a lot of Schuler gigs you know and they varied you know like if you if you got a good one it was a couple hundred bucks maybe more you know depending on what kind a bar he set up those were great gigs you know he would like have and some of them some of them were really fun they had a lot of them Scher had a lot of them in Connecticut that were great [ __ ] gigs Brown what is it called Brown Thompson is that what it is godd damn it place in Hartford he used to have that was like a really good comedy club it was he's he it was the only place in Hartford because at the time I think there's an improv in Harford Connecticut now right funny BM a funny BM yeah there wasn't any back in the day I want to say it was called Brown Thompson it was like a bar and uh they used to they used to book the comedy there and it was like a [ __ ] Comedy Club it was like a real Club it was a great gig like people get excited about that gig it was a good one had them all over the place two places where I thought I could possibly get killed doing comedy Craig Colorado is heavy [ __ ] duty Colorado that was
the first time ever I got addendum uh what do you call that [ __ ] when you get the paperwork on the gig and it said uh it said room is known to be active if anything happens run to your room and contact the bar manager like that's what it the of the triple run and the other crazy gig I did was a place called these civilizations these cities had been taken over by the cities and they didn't give a [ __ ] it was called Rock Springs Wyoming Rock Springs Wyoming they had done a thing on 60 Minutes about Rock Springs how the mob had taken over Rock Springs Wyoming and that's where they took wounded hookers from Las Vegas and re vantom and fish their [ __ ] and made them hook small time and they had a strip club day it was like AAA I'm not kidding you dog this is a look it up Rock Springs Wyoming 60 Minutes the feds had to go in and take it back from the local [ __ ] government what this is craziness this [ __ ] they had gambling stuff and uh Mike well what's his name like two of the guys from 60 Minutes went up there and did a report about it there's some crazy [ __ ] places out there that you'll never know about unless you drive through I just got an email from a [ __ ] great guy that said he has a room in Billings myomi a Montana a 400 seat Little Theater and he sent me an email I'm thinking about going up there obviously like in [ __ ] May because that's the only month that's [ __ ] warm up there there's a website called Rockspring hookers oh no no that don't F but that's not Rock Spring Wyoming hookers. net there you go there you go dog they don't [ __ ] around there it's to a different level that's where wounded hookers go they get rehab the monkey they get rid of the chyan the HIV Ray mer takes care of him and punches him don't pull it up don't pull it up Brian don't put it up it's pretty too disturbing no yeah you can't do that what's that the website is it bad I shouldn't have mentioned the name of it anyway oh yeah yeah who gives a [ __ ] pull it up my fault no no is it disgusting yes yes and no and I don't want you to pull it up how many bruises they got I don't think we should re me I mean it's an illegal business they're going to get in trouble I don't want to get in trouble they're providing they're providing give they're on they but look at their
interview but look at the interview for 60 minutes please just look 60 Minutes up and see see 60 Minutes 60 Minutes Rock Springs Wyoming 19 92 93 [ __ ] I don't know if it's the same Dom fig but you know we're talking about Dom fig the Vampire comic look at this there's a guy named Dom fig that took this [ __ ] picture of a wave hitting the buildings in Connecticut holy [ __ ] look at this this was when Sandy hit Brian see that [ __ ] oh [ __ ] yeah pull that picture up it's a photographer a struck after catching a wave this is an incredible picture it's incredible because like the idea that he was there while this actually happened like you shouldn't be anywhere [ __ ] near there and this crazy [ __ ] is not just there he's taking pictures phographer a struck after catching a wave is the title a wave yeah this is nuts man did you find it okay go to uh cost.com or just look up Dom fig comic and then click on the third link and you see Dominic fig comic Dominic fig comic and then look under the third picture Dominic fig comic and look under the third uh link rather it'll say Connecticut Post okay here we go look at this [ __ ] picture man this is insane I mean it's insane it's like what what were they thinking building houses there first of all that's like beautiful for most of the time but [ __ ] man if there's a possibility what but it didn't matter if you were right in front of the water with this [ __ ] right like they went like several blocks in just destroying everything in its path it's like we're so crazy to think that the ocean's going to stay where it is what a Nutty idea to like build expensive [ __ ] right next to the edge like this the EDG is right here this is my spot [ __ ] got marked it off this is my house I got I'm up on stilts you know they put their house right right at the water and like the the gamble is like how long is the water going to be there is it going to stay there for 100 years it's going to stay there for 50 years what's the gamble you know and everybody's willing to take that gamble because if you can open up your window and you're there on the ocean like it's a boat that's [ __ ]
amazing you know so they take that gamble Park that [ __ ] right next to the rocks and hope that nothing melts yeah but you would have a bigger gamble having a house on the mountain like like with the fires that you had you know that's true well fires are everywhere in California I mean they I talked to a firefighter that said there's a real worry and not of if but when that one day one of these [ __ ] wildfires that they get is going to catch LA and the wind's going to be just right and he said it's G to burn right to the beach I go you think it'll burn down Hollywood he goes I don't think we can stop it he goes if if you're dealing with the kind of fire that can go that far and is is that strong and it's wind AED and it's just big enough because fires can be really really really [ __ ] big you know it's hard to wrap your head around how big they can be but they can be so big that you can't [ __ ] control them all you do is try to contain them but you can't control them and if they get that big and they they can't cut it off in time and it starts going towards La if it's the right time of year the right amount of Santa Anda winds kicking in [ __ ] man look what happened last year in New Jersey I didn't think it happen look it's happening right now Montana like there the in in Phoenix or in Arizona rather with the dust storm somebody told me they were driving back from Vegas on Sunday and it was [ __ ] scary as [ __ ] the car was going over the took them 8 and 1 half hours to get home with the trff the wind and [ __ ] listen that's going to everything's getting more extreme everything's getting more [ __ ] extreme brother the Heat's getting more extreme the cold is getting more extreme and you know I'm not [ __ ] Al Gore I'm not going to sit here and tell you all that [ __ ] no you know I thought you podcast over I thought you didn't know you know I don't know what the [ __ ] going on but we evolve right so that means the weather has to [ __ ] evolve right and you know 20 years ago I remember being in Jersey hanging out playing whiffle ball and within 3 minutes it would get dark dog and all a sudden these chunks of [ __ ] hail would come out you know but look at now now I went to the shore 80 times 80 [ __ ] thousand times I went to that Jersey sh ask me did I think that it
would dissipate like the way Sandy came up and you know what in three years guess what there's going to be another one Jack you know those people we see every year I had a tornado I ain't leaving people make a thousand jokes about that's going to be South Jersey in [ __ ] 3 years every three it's going to be every seven or eight years then it's going to go down the [ __ ] every four years and and then 50 years from now it'll be every [ __ ] you know that just the way it is we evolved man though everything moves don't they find those dinosaur bones and and mantana didn't you say right and then they belong to fish or seab bass or whatever the [ __ ] it was well there was a great western Inland Sea there yeah that's how there used to be a [ __ ] interior ocean the thing that's always stunned me about Boulder is the Devil's Thumb when you're on Baseline and you're driving close to University in South bold and you look to your right and there's a thing that pops out of the [ __ ] Mountain this this this just this figure go ahead look it up bould the Colorado the Devil's Thumb and it pops up and it makes you [ __ ] think it makes you [ __ ] you know it's the weirdest thing I hiked up there one time cuz my dog uh not Hercules yeah Hercules went up there and was missing for a night and I went up there and [ __ ] tried to look him down they got snakes up there the whole thing but it makes you think man what the [ __ ] was here 3 million years ago not me so I don't know I don't have the answer did you hear about that you go look at the Devil stump yeah come on now I'm right there in Baseline when you're driving look at that [ __ ] thing that's a beautiful thing did you hear about the kid in Minnesota that got bitten by a wolf wolf bit him in his [ __ ] head while he was sleeping and wouldn't let go wolf was trying to eat him he was sleeping outside the tent and uh I guess it's I mean I don't know why there other people in the tent I don't know what the whole story was but the wolf clamped a hold of his [ __ ] head and wouldn't let go you imagine what a terrifying feeling it is when a wolf a 75lb wolf has clamped a hold of your head while you're sleeping and this is the uh the first known attack uh in that state's history that they have like documented I
think [ __ ] sharks biting people more and more every [ __ ] day dude I was in Hawaii and they they bit two [ __ ] people while I was there one of them died are you serious yeah they one kid got bit in his leg he was surfing he got bit and another woman got her arm bit off and she died the kid lived the boy lived cuz his friends uh tied his leg off with the tourniquet and brought him into the um into the hospital like really quickly yeah they used a um uh like a leash I think like a like a leash for a surfboard and they uh they tied off his leg and tourniquet pulled him out of the water but they saw him they saw him get attacked by the shark bit him in the leg it's tiger sharks apparently and they're trying to figure out now like the people in um Hawaii or they're going to do some studies now they're going to try to figure out why are these tiger sharks being more aggressive but there's there's there's going to be a lot of issues with wildlife in the ocean as well because these predators don't have as much to eat because we fish so much we take so much tuna and so many different fish that they they survive off of like I would imagine that a lot of fish are going to be in in real trouble like the fish that also rely on the fish that we eat cuz we [ __ ] kill everything man and all the fish has that [ __ ] [ __ ] in it right now from Tokyo I have you been seeing all that yeah there's a 3% increase I think they said in the amount of radiation that uh they they've found in fish which is not not worrisome as far as like Health apparently you get away with a little bit but the the the worry is that this could get worse yeah you see that radiation chart where it just shows like in like 15 years we're all pretty much [ __ ] and Fukushima is [ __ ] crazy yeah that's a scary scary situation I mean it's it's it's much more scary than it's been you know like oh my god did you see what Miley Cyrus did on TV she lit stuck her tongue out and showed her butt meanwhile there's a [ __ ] hole in the earth that's filled with radio active [ __ ] and it's leaking into the ocean I mean it's really scary there they can't stop it they can't contain it and they don't know what the [ __ ] to do and instead we're looking at Syria and we're looking at all these other maybe there's threats I mean maybe
maybe Syria is someplace we really do need to be maybe they are using chemical weapons but for sure that [ __ ] is going down to Fukushima for [ __ ] sure there's a real problem there and TECO doesn't know what the [ __ ] to do and no one in the world has a solution for it I mean I don't I don't know what the hell they're going to do I mean it's just constantly leaking radioactive waste and what are the people in Tokyo what's that going to be like in a decade you know what what I mean it's right down the hill from that [ __ ] place what is what is what is going to happen what is are they going to have any like nonradioactive fish and don't they rely on fish like there's a huge amount of their income and their their diet that relies on fish that's going to be a terrible Place could be a real issue you know they're finding radioactive bunnies like bunnies that have deformities and [ __ ] that live there they're born with no ears there's like all sorts of weird [ __ ] going down near there yeah what if the fish start turning into like like like these tiger sharks are eating these radi you know these fish and stuff and it's in the water and it starts becoming what like a zombie shark NATO I mean like that that's like real you know like listen to that statement and imagine that using cord against you I mean like these fish are going to these fish are Imagine like you trying to argue that you're smart and then like okay now that's real it's like fish shark NATO zombie fish shark NATO no but I mean like if the fish become like some mutant kind of animals that yeah well you know that could happen I mean I don't think that's really how things mutate the life isn't a [ __ ] comic book son but yeah in a comic book that would become Godzilla it would become the uh the creature for the Black Lagoon or some [ __ ] Godzilla made you thought it was made no no Godzilla was a creation uh because of the atomic bombs posed they they uh the US drops atomic bombs on Japan and then Godzilla is born because of the radiation like all those animals those giant animals Mothra all that [ __ ] Rodan I believe Ro maybe Rodan was from space so coming true well that was the idea no it's not coming true just some [ __ ] sharks bit some people those are good movies to you saw the
string and it [ __ ] your world up you're like from the Mathra string yeah the MRA string and [ __ ] wowow when [ __ ] ABC would do Monster Week at 4:30 the after school movie 4:30 after Dark Shadows you threw some [ __ ] heat Jack yeah pull up some videos of Godzilla oh Godzilla versus the smog monster that's who the baddest one was Godzilla versus The Smog Monster you remember when it was King Kong versus Godzilla they had to make King Kong the same size that was was very disappointing to me when I was a boy that I found out how much smaller King Kong was in Godzilla wasn't even close Godzilla's like 500 feet high King Kong's 50 feet high 50 feet high ain't [ __ ] when you're dealing with Godzilla but in Godzilla versus King Kong all of a sudden King Kong's huge that's a good little [ __ ] Jam too bloys to Godzilla oh no there goes Tokyo go go Godzilla yeah that was blue oyster C right yeah look the smoke wakes him up those movies were so people today can't understand how awesome those movies are play that there you go you know people don't understand how amazing these movies were amazing it's LA versus Tokyo friend look how bad this is this is [Applause] incredible oh that's when he became the Smog Monster remember and he flies around just blowing poison Smog on people Chemtrails bro yeah he was the original Chemtrails Smog Monster look everybody look how bad the [ __ ] special effects are oh my God it's amazing mainan oil company has exploded what people don't understand is when you were a kid or when I was a kid rather and we would watch this we would have to be we would you you were you had to suspend disbelief you were just amazed that they could show you any visual representation of a gigantic lizard like anything that remotely looked like it you were willing to accept like look at that look how bad that is but we were willing to accept it because we knew that up until then like that was the best that was the best that was it like if you go to the original King Kong and the original King Kong the difference between the way the Japanese did it and the way Ray Harry husen did it um I think it's Ray Harry husen I
might have made that up but uh the animator they used to do it frame by frame they would they would just move the clay a little take a picture move the clay a little take a picture move the clay a little take a picture it took [ __ ] forever but they would have these elaborate fight scenes with these clay animals that they created so he'd like King Kong fighting against dinosaurs that [ __ ] took forever and look what looked like look at look how [ __ ] fake it looks like it moves around wow that looked like I hurt yeah it's like people got [ __ ] up it barely even looks like it's there like played that look it barely even looks like it's there like there's a guy in front of it and he's looking at it what are you doing I was singing I can barely see him look at that it's weird and look at the [ __ ] special effects like what what was King Kong it was like 1936 or some [ __ ] 33 wow so back then this was was the greatest [ __ ] thing in the world ever know you can't believe they even pulled this off I mean the special effects for back then were unbelievably incredible like people were so excited to see this when you look at like King Kong itself like show King Kong itself like when you see him where's King Kong Co the guy's getting up they're trying to figure out what happened look look how fake this looks it's a lizard but this is a real lizard though I think they just stuck a real lizard in there nope no n that's animated too wow wow sometimes they would do that though they would have a movie and they would have like a real lizard and you could tell the lizard was nowhere near them in real life but they'd be like oh look and they would just insert this giant [ __ ] lizard in the back how weird must it have been to act in these movies okay there's a spider it's 16 feet tall it's coming at you now run look at him he's like scrambling and then they have to add in this killer spider this is nuts like look how bad it looks when they pick up someone and they're getting bit this is so stupid watch out but that was as good as the world had ever seen back then yeah it was it was impossible to get any better like that was incredible like people must
have been so excited and there was no I mean what [ __ ] TV shows were on in 1936 how you do or 33 did they even have TV in 33 I when did they invent TV when's the invention of TV invention of TV yeah for a while it was just just movies right TV probably came a long time I thought it was [ __ ] radio like the I thought the Green Hornet was a radio show and all that [ __ ] the TV I didn't find anything for when huh okay so apparently there's not not a single thing7 there's not a single thing that you can point to because there's a lot of [ __ ] that got invented that related to the invent imagine sitting around with a bunch of people and your family and listening to the Green Hornet that' be amazing 88 to 9 every Friday night and then Wednesday was something else and Thursday was comedy night like theyd have like uh not Jackie gleon but the other guy like uh L Orphan Annie yeah someone something like it happened in 1862 was the first still image that was transferred and this guy had something called a Pantagraph so he transferred a picture by Telegraph this thing or this electronic thing transferred and he became the first person to transmit a still image over wires [ __ ] man they figured that out in 1862 you know how crazy that is slavery became illegal in 1865 so while they were still slaves someone had figured out had to send a photo over wire [ __ ] remember when the telegram was huge do you remember that when you were a kid the telegram was huge they had huge commercial Western Union Western Union was huge you can you had to go to Western then pay cash then they got the credit card and that was the beginning of the end and [ __ ] that was the beginning of this is incredible stuff man they uh in 19 in 1873 scientists May and Smith experimented with selenium and light and this reveals the possibility for inventors to transform images into electronic signals how the [ __ ] did they figure that out I mean think about how nutty that is these dudes are riding horses and some [ __ ] figured out how to turn images into electronic
signal so you could sender them send sender them so you can send them over W look how [ __ ] stupid I am hundreds of years later what was the first picture of porn had to be right probably his dick probably a guy s some chck a picture of his dick his poop look at my poop F lady it was yeah it was some crafty cat it's like this [ __ ] has got to see my dick if she sees my dick it's on right now she wants to stay in Philadelphia so [ __ ] what do I do I'm in New Mexico sending pictures of your slaves this is amazing stuff man so in 1900 they called the television at the world pair World's Fair in Paris the first International Congress of electricity was held and that is where Russian Constantine perski yeah Constantine perski made the first known use of the word television so it was invented by a Russian gentleman or the word was at least amazing you know when you go back and think about dudes that were inventing like really mindblowing [ __ ] like back in the 1800s or the 15 you know even earlier than that like the the dude who figured out the printing press yeah but you know how much [ __ ] you didn't have like [ __ ] like interfering with you like the you didn't have an internet you didn't have a TV you didn't have you had to invent [ __ ] you had to go to the woods what about the guy that invented meth how he don't get no credit the guy who invented meth how about that give him credit every day that guy was awesome that [ __ ] poor soul in the trailer had no money for drugs and just started putting [ __ ] together when I saw that on Discovery I was blown the [ __ ] away people who was it that invented math is there one dude who know I don't know but putting a battery the core of a battery uh cold medicine just just are you [ __ ] kidding me like what did you come up with who gave you this recipe wasn't um wasn't meth used in like World War II like the story was that they used the Hitler troops used it and the they used it on the Japanese kamakazi Pilots to get them to be but it was speed I don't know if it's the [ __ ] that they have now in a tub that the you know sons of anaki sells I don't [ __ ] know I'm just telling you that what the [ __ ] you know I mean yeah it's not a new drug it was first made in
1887 again so 1887 yeah uh H want to send a picture of his dick to some chick so before he can invent the camera and to get the electronic wave he had to stay up for a week to [ __ ] do it I'm sorry that that was just amphetamines so amphetamines for 1887 methampetamine which was more potent and easy to make was developed in Japan in 1919 the crystalline powder was soluble in water making it for uh making it a perfect candidate for injection methamphetamine went into wide use during World War II when both sides used it to keep troops awake holy [ __ ] [ __ ] high doses were given to Japanese kamakazi Pilots before their suicide missions and after the war meth methamphetamine abuse by injection reached epidemic proportions when supplies stored for military use became available to the Japanese public man in 1950s methampetamine was prescribed as a diet Aid and to fight depression easily available it was used as a non-medical stimulant by college students truck drivers and athletes and the abuse of the drug spread holy [ __ ] did you know that they used to prescribe methamphetamines for depression let's at least probably work think about it's a back door yeah well that was in the liberachi movie yeah remember the the California diet he gave some of mamin you know what's crazy that I remember when I was growing up there was this crazy kid on the Block and he had whatever they diagnosed to den as ADD but they used to give him speed to calm him down right I remember he was [ __ ] he used to jump off his own roof why would you do that yeah well they say that's uh with uh Ridin this was way before Rin he was he his sister used to sell him his black beauties oh really yeah they they had this kid on some heavy duty [ __ ] I used to go to East strawsburg Pennsylvania and buy a th000 black beauties for 35 bucks and I would sell what is exactly a black beauty it was these little [ __ ] black things they made in the 70s and they were the original diet pill and it was an amphetamine an amphetamine do you know what kind it was no who gives a [ __ ] they were $35 for a, I sold them for 100,000 $35 for I would sell them for 35 to1 to the wrestlers at a dollar a piece you have no idea what a cash car that
thing was oh my God and I remember like one night I went out and I had no blow and I ate like three of them and drank and a zette and I was sick for a [ __ ] week like I never ate those pills but I remember people cracking them open and snorting those [ __ ] you know what's really interesting like you talking about that and you talking about selling bootlegging these illegal drugs it's like it depends on how much money you make and what you do with that money whether or not you become become legitimate I was a junior in high school but what I'm saying is like I know but look at the kennedies the kennedies did the exact same thing the kennedies became legitimate they became a very wealthy and established family from moonshine they were selling drugs they were selling liquid drugs that were illegal but they did they did the right thing with all the money they got got a hold of it invested it in politics started getting I mean they they did a they had a lot of [ __ ] money and then you know they got out of it once it became legal or something I I don't know how the [ __ ] they transitioned a bootle it but that's like the the known history of Joe Kennedy right the the the Father the father was like a he was a moonshine runner which is kind of crazy I mean how much different is that really than you selling these black beauties it's really no different like morally or ethically it's the same thing so like if you had stuck with the black beauty business and then got into politics later I mean that would have been that would have been acceptable let me tell you some those were that was right after my mom died and I was like crazy yeah and I would go on Saturdays with this kid Nick bamonti he was a football player up there he would pick me up we drive like an hour and a half and we go into this room these college kids that look like they were 40 and that's all they did all week was make different uh things and they would make acid blot acid paper they would make four-way acid they would make little musculine and they would make black beauties and that's what they did all week and and their parents thought they were going to school these these you know before the computer nerd this is what nerds did right they had this was these kids were probably millionaires I remember them
having z28s were big remember z28s in 1980 they both had IR rocks with the the cut Moon dish that came out like oh yeah the T yeah no these guys were making money guys meanwhile I remember them going our dad send us money we don't go to class we pay rent they had a gambling thing during the week yeah these kids were banging it they were crazy little [ __ ] uh I don't even know what they were Irish kid I remember the t-tops thing yeah the T-top and Ted Nan and we go and they show us these guys had a garage with jars of black Beauty's jars that was their main stay and then everything else they made as they went along like this week will'll make blad acid this week will'll make four-way acid this week will'll make uh window paint acid [ __ ] just complete different world bro do you remember when everybody had that Trans Am just like Bert Reynolds with the eag the hood yes there was a Giant Eagle sticker like it was important to have that sticker pull that [ __ ] up pull that uh Bert Reynold wasth trans that eagle sticker is important man like I know I knew a dude who had one um rebuilt had it uh it was like for a TV show and they they had to get that sticker man that was like a big part of it was putting that sticker on like you had they had to get it like recreated so they could cuz they restor the entire car like that sticker remember how big of a f though it goes It goes back more cooler one has exposed headlights I remember the big Feud when two people got an ey Rock in the same neighborhood like that became a feud like you had to throw down so one guy would park across the street and you would park across the street facing the other direction and whoever had like the loudest stereo and the hottest chicks on you know what I'm saying like You' be listening to Aldo [ __ ] Nova and you this just a fantasy can you have you seen that video lately when you get a minute at home toight put the video on it beginning no that's not the one either because that has closed you got it's got to be the one with the exposed headlights these are all like new versions that's the one that's the real one that's the Bert Reynolds jamy right there look how badass that car was look how badass that car was I think people who are not male canot understand that you know you show that to a woman
especially like a mature woman but someone's been to college taking a look at that and go what the [ __ ] are you what go back to that it would be cool to it would be cool to have that like black on like silver like where you could see only see it like silver wise I was looking for a better one but well there's there's um people have done like little custom ones I remember that I'd seen some some custom really cool spray painted ones you know like um what's it called air gun well those are like air gun artists remember that they used to do those uh oh that's a pretty dope one remember they used to do like Vans and on the side of Vans would be like some [ __ ] like a Conan scene like a dude yeah it was airbrushed right there was a dude with a sword and you know like [ __ ] women like Frank fretta style do you remember that like that was a big thing those vans to have a a bar in there you were bour and [ __ ] why go to a hotel with the little windows in the back and they had like a moon roof dog we could smoke in here pop the moon roof like that was like big time yeah the moon roof was huge the moon roof was [ __ ] huge and what kind of artwork you had on the side of your van was [ __ ] it was all ugly you look at it thing you go what the [ __ ] was I thinking a [ __ ] Japanese guy with a hammer with a fish in his hand sexy [ __ ] I'm going to pull this up van with airbrush artwork there's a couple guys in Burbank that have that they they airbrush Vans and it's like they they'll have they'll change them all the time like the latest one was like Wonder Woman it just she looked like a Mexican Wonder Woman though dude go to that go to van with airbrush artwork it's still going strong there's still some [ __ ] cool pictures out there you just got to find these guys oh they still do it definitely I didn't know I hadn't seen one in a long time I've seen cool [ __ ] on uh like tour buses and stuff this is the kind of [ __ ] that is like by me at my house like this is what it looks like that's awesome come on man how awesome is that Luke Skywalker Obi-Wan Kenobi C3 poo aliens that's pretty badass but there's a lot of them yeah this oh God someone's got to have a Frank fretta out there I bet if I look up fretta airbrook fretta that guy had in my opinion like
the Yeah well yeah somebody's got something here what is that does that look like a fretta that guy had the best like fantasy art when you were a kid did you like like Frank fretta did do you remember those paintings no you know he is no did you ever get into books or or comic books or anything [ __ ] like that when you were young a couple months I was big into I was into Marvel like the four what Marvel Comics The fantastic I like the Silver Surfer and the only reason it was a long [ __ ] story that's I was until like n 10 months we go to the festivals in the city and we tried to buy Batman 3 or some [ __ ] and yeah it was just a couple months then I went off the deep end it was no no no more [ __ ] comic books now it's all SpongeBob 247 no [ __ ] comic books turned around came right back to it for me I was uh I was really into those um uh fantasy artists like fretta I'm trying to think of some of the other names there was a bunch of other names of guys who were like really uh really famous for that but fretta was my favorite because I was such a big fan of the Conan series and he did a lot of the um a lot of the artwork pull pull some of those pictures up man they're incredible he just it's just like that to me like symbolized that kind of that genre of book did you ever have a van Joey a van yeah no I drove a van for a construction no a a hardware company for about six weeks oh yeah and then yeah I got fired they're still there they're still [ __ ] there the really the hardware store on fairw Avenue yeah yeah when you go back and look at some [ __ ] from your childhood it's strange when you see stuff that's still there the guy is still [ __ ] there was the f I got arrested January 29th 1983 I I uh got caught for possession of stolen tools you know like uh stolen property like the do crime type [ __ ] I went out on bail I paid a fine I was on probation for 6 months or something like that and that was it it was dumb as [ __ ] but I worked at that lumber yard and I had a good little job over there I was a delivery driver I could make my own little stops at that time I was doing a false like a a settle type deal so I had to go to the chiropractor that gave me time to go to chiropractor and all that
[ __ ] every day it was it was just a was like 250 a week and I work six days a week wow and I had to drive to the metal lands and you know different construction sites and drop off tools and lolium and screws and nails there a [ __ ] you do I drove a van uh when I was about uh I guess I was about 18 had a van for a while for uh delivered newspapers I bought like a second car cuz the newspapers would [ __ ] up my suspension like everybody who delivered newspapers your suspension got [ __ ] up by the Sunday paper because it's so much weight cuz you'd fill up your [ __ ] trunk with uh newspapers and then you put them in the back seat you'd stuff them in the front seat all the way up to the ceiling so you were driving around like almost completely blind on the right hand side it was very tricky like looking around at where you were going and so after a while I made a little bit of cash with this [ __ ] Venture and like me I'm always thinking of expanding I uh I got a van I bought big ass cargo van with no windows and then I expanded my route I was using red wagons well I had to figure out a way to make enough money that I didn't have to do anything else while I was competing and so the only way I could really think of before I made money on teaching was deliver newspapers there the only thing that made sense to me because it was several hours a day like three or four hours a day but when it was done it was done and that's it there was no boss to answer to As Long As I delivered the papers to where they were supposed to go there was no problems and I was good at it I did it every day and it Tau discipline like having something that you have to do 365 days a year makes you [ __ ] do it just do it you know didn't even think about it [ __ ] do it it's a part of your life you just get up and do it I applied for a paper route one time like going into the eighth grade I wanted to be a goody good whatever and I apply for a paper out like in July this [ __ ] calls me like Thanksgiving week and I don't even think about like okay and he goes you got to pick up it was 43rd Street Hill this is a hill and a half this is one of those Hills in my hometown they compare to that San Francisco Hill oh yeah and Rog L I walk over there and it's [ __ ] you know 18
Ines of snow that East Coast snow and I got to walk and for three weeks I had to break through that [ __ ] thing go over there at 4 in the afternoon it's freezing the sun comes down there you're [ __ ] freezing I'm delivering paper knocking on people's doors with that that loop with the people's [ __ ] cards in it nobody had one of those things you had a circle Loop and you had people's addresses when they paid you last they were good tippers you had all that [ __ ] on there and I remember after 3 weeks just quit and going dog I ain't doing this [ __ ] no more that hell was a [ __ ] I go work for my mother and make that in one [ __ ] day what I'm making for you 40 bucks I got to hustle six days a week I go in my mother's for one day I play withle ball I eat [ __ ] Chinese food I come home with [ __ ] 50 60 get the [ __ ] out of here walk up down the hill [ __ ] you the [ __ ] out the [ __ ] out of here I learned how to drive in the snow man that's what I learned I was driving the snow like all winter long because I drove every day I drove every day so if it snowed I [ __ ] drove so I got so used to getting stuck I get stuck everywhere I'd slide in the trees like I [ __ ] up a lot of cars my [ __ ] my record was terrible by the time I I moved to New York it was like really hard for me to get insurance I had a gang of accidents I I had I was a horrible driver then I made the mistake of moving to Asen and you think you know what the [ __ ] you're doing until there's black ice on that [ __ ] and you're going down the road listening to [ __ ] Joe Welsh uh you know Rocky Mountain High and all a sudden your car just goes like this red band just goes shush and off that Shish this back just starts [ __ ] spinning you just go into a tail spin you don't know what the [ __ ] to do just go into a [ __ ] Tail Spin man yeah and right there you're like I got to learn how to drive and pay [ __ ] attention this is a complete I hit so many [ __ ] cars Joe Rogan so many cars i l i remember in Seattle I was a car salesman they used to give me a car I would take the car at night and go to gigs to one nighters and I lose [ __ ] hub caps oh my God I was horrible there's a terrible terrible terrible video not not this one of uh some people going down a road and they
lose control of their car and they hit a a truck head on it's crazy the people from behind them are filming it the guy in front loses his [ __ ] and just at the right time swerves into the oncoming Lane no idea man oh this guy just crossed and oh my God here you go [ __ ] [ __ ] oh Jesus Christ this is scary This Guy's in the wrong [ __ ] Lane God that's so scary oh my God and he has to cross over how does he cross over I don't miss any of this [ __ ] man I grew up in Ohio so I had to deal with this all the time but look at this look you spun out boom oncoming traffic Boom the only good part is when you got in an accidents it wasn't as bad because you were sliding when you hit the person you what I mean that's a big deal yeah that's a big deal when you got in an accident in the snow was like bumper cars kind of yeah yeah people who don't know they don't they've never experienced that before boom like that in in any other s situation would be a devastating impact it's still can be pretty [ __ ] like this is bad cuz this is like oh this is horrible what is this guy doing he lost his [ __ ] wow okay you g me anxiety I'm watching this I'm getting anxiety I really honestly think that people who don't grow up driving in this kind of [ __ ] you you you miss out on a certain amount of adversity in life this the fear that you get the respect for the winter you know oh my God I don't want to see this Jesus Christ this is going to be bad oh look at this guy spinning out head oncoming traffic no one can stop how about the [ __ ] that get in that car in Colorado like that drunk oh yeah insane go down 82 82 Route 82 look it up it's one of the most dangerous roads in the [ __ ] oh my God he's going over the cliff oh oh he spun around he got lucky this is [ __ ] scary please shut this off this is not good this is not good for your spirit you're just seeing destruction that's the weird thing about like the internet and like choosing to go search for [ __ ] like you could see disturbing [ __ ] after disturbing [ __ ] after like you just be bombarded by nothing but disturbing [ __ ] just whereas in real life like it's really hard to run into that much disturbing [ __ ] but you could watch if you're if you if you drive every winter
you might see one of those crazy pileups in 10 years of driving I've lived in some we saw 10 in a row you've lived in some places in Boston where it's just disturbing waking up in the morning it is and it's one disturbing s and everybody who comes to you after a while you start looking at them weird like what the [ __ ] is this like a are they putting me on yeah like that's how real some places are man there's places situations you got yourself in that it's just a walking disturbance so you don't need to [ __ ] uh look at this [ __ ] or go online well there's like a hopelessness to to some places you know there's some places where when you're there like especially in the winter there's like a weird hopelessness there's no joy there's no Aspen to it like Aspen in the winter it's kind of festive people are skiing the town's hopping there's a lot of smell the wood burning It's [ __ ] amazing the wood burning when you smell that wood burning your whole heart stops you're like what the [ __ ] beautiful it's completely I remember being 8 minutes from the greatest world the greatest city in the world and feeling hopeless like a the linkoln tunnel going across the Lincoln Tunnel is the biggest city in the world in 1980 like as a kid and going you know this is hopelessness this is too much this is it was too [ __ ] much then you know it was everything you wanted like that at 2: in the morning everything you wanted what what you could buy a machine gun with a bazooka in Harlem at in the morning you go up to Harlem there's a Puerto Rican that'll sit there for 10 minutes and go let me think bro what do you want I want need a machine gun with a clip I want to shoot a thousand people I need a stick of [ __ ] dynamite and they'll sit there for 10 minutes and I get you the dynamite tonight and you're sitting there going oh [ __ ] do you remember when that guy got arrested in Harlem because he had a tiger in his house do you remember that's that's Harlem if that story had happened in any other place in the world if that was in Cleveland I'd be like how odd but as in Harlem I was like okay I believe that the dude got bit and so that's how he got in trouble his tiger bit him and they found out this [ __ ] had a tiger in his house he had like a bunch of exotic pets let me pull up the story
a man had tiger in his house in Harlem and tiger and his Harlem is has Harlem been gentrified yes a lot of white people live in harl now it's all the way up to 140 now he beautiful they to clean know he didn't just have a tiger he had an alligator too please those are pimps in Harlem D the [ __ ] imagine you come over this guy's house I used to cop Coke in Harlem all hours of the night I used to when I was 18 just out of high school I used to go to 135th in amer Dam where you had to walk through the room where the the chickens were fighting right this is real and you walk through the room where the chickens were fighting and then you walked into a DJ Boot and they'd waited for you and there times I go over and the cops were there they wouldn't let you go in because somebody got got shot and then remember when who did Mike Tyson fight in Harlem at 4 in the [ __ ] morning one night talk Mitch blood green are you [ __ ] kidding me at a Hab herdashery are you yeah at a habashy at 4 in the [ __ ] morning what's a habashy like when you go buy clothes men's clothing or something where Brothers go to buy [ __ ] clothes who goes to a Hab a dash that's when you pull some Tom that's when you a gentleman that's when you pull that Tom Cruz [ __ ] what was that movie he made we had to call the Arabian guy and get clothing and the chick's daughter was [ __ ] tremendous move Tom Cruz Tom Cruz made a movie years ago with Nicole Kidman as his wife and she had cheat on him with a [ __ ] Soldier it was one of those movies by that director that [ __ ] di shut yes that was the that was the theme all I remember about that movie is the crazy dance Stanley kubri directed that so it's a demented movie they go to [ __ ] the chick and the chick dies of an OD in the doctor's office and he's telling the guy to get it together but he has to wear a cape and a mask so he calls like this habashi at 2: in the morning in New York they open up the [ __ ] door and they give him a cape and then the little Arabian girls [ __ ] the two Japanese employees this is a tremendous [ __ ] movie then he goes over there he gets in he goes to the back everybody's naked everybody's sucking and [ __ ] you got to walk around with a cape and a [ __ ] mask and a magician's hat on and then they
threaten him and he goes back home to Nicole Kidman and she's telling her that one night while he was away she [ __ ] the Sailor so it's it's like going in his mind you know what I'm saying so it's it's just a [ __ ] up movie he gets the address from the piano player at the jazz bar that's a great movie by the way it's a dark [ __ ] movie remember they had it for a few years then they released it it was kind of weird because it was them two working together I don't [ __ ] know what I'm talking well Eyes Wide Shut was uh it it was about like some weird Elite sort of a cult right Scientology through the back door yeah was that what it was like it was like he was trying he was mask hung out with Callen stuff like that there's um a 1972 there's some photos uh that Duncan had on his website um they're photos from a 1972 Roth's child surrealist dinner party it's so weird man it's so weird so this is the Rothschild's I guess I'm not like totally up on this but they're supposed to be the people that are like you know Elite Banker type characters right so they've got this uh this party and they're all wearing these crazy outfits man like this lady's wearing like a stag head like she has the head of a deer on and a mask and the man is wearing this weird thing on his [ __ ] head and they have this uh dinner table set up with a baby doll and like it's [ __ ] trippy [ __ ] really weird [ __ ] because these really were the rilds and they this is really how they were rolling they really did have parties where women would wear antlers on their heads where um they would have naked women uh pushed around on like like a it looks like a casket covered in roses it's like it's really strange or at least an effigy of a naked woman actually it looks like I can't tell if that's a real woman they kill a [ __ ] they kill a [ __ ] too they would kill a [ __ ] drop in the wood looks like just like a hipster party well it's a bit of a party for sure they're crazy people it's a bit of a party for sure but the I think the idea they like some freaky [ __ ] if you want to follow the conspiracy theory the idea is that these type of people these Elite societies that what they would do is they would have these rituals and they would do something really [ __ ] up so no one could ever talk about it like they would
kill somebody like they take a prostitute and kill her in front of everybody and then bury her somewhere and no one could talk about it because they were all implicated and so that's everyone you know it's like you're bond to this this cult that was the IDE I mean that's always look at that that woman's wearing a [ __ ] stag head it's like a big deer mask how weird when you have like billions of dollars and it's 1976 you're like [ __ ] it you know there's no internet you can't get in trouble no Anonymous is going to [ __ ] take down your website because because you're some crazy Rothschild's character these people back then Jesus Christ brother to have so much money that you pay off an attorney the night before the party like a liaison to the police department you [ __ ] have a service come in to park cars they're not allowed in there everybody has mask so even if you do kill a [ __ ] nobody knows who killed it it was so some dude with a [ __ ] goat's face on you don't know who the [ __ ] that was there's no IDs there's no nothing you're [ __ ] bear back you're just spreading chyia like a [ __ ] at those things those and those no no no I'm lying those chicks get checked out those dudes go all out they [ __ ] send those [ __ ] to the doctor blood test [ __ ] scans [ __ ] the whole [ __ ] thing what's the best scan for [ __ ] is it MRI I don't [ __ ] know I don't you know it's got to be something you know some [ __ ] freaky [ __ ] up in Rock Springs Wyoming and [ __ ] I'm telling you that's why they take those hookers and they Revitalize them they put some pep in their step well back in those cowboy days right they used to have the brothel where they would like go in this big [ __ ] wooden building you know in the upstairs with I mean all the outlaw Josie Wales movies I mean that what was the movie um uh the the the comeback movie for him way back in you know like with Morgan Freeman Unforgiven Unforgiven thank you that movie was about a prostitute at AB broth getting cut up by a bad guy and then him going after them remember that yes that's a good movie I got to watch a great [ __ ] movie Unforgiven is in my opinion one of the best yeah yeah and it's a black [ __ ] sheep nobody really
watch exactly or toast what's that and it's so realistic man it's like he went and did the exact opposite of like you know like a a hero movie where everything's predictable like was nonpredictable at all it was very dark and very realistic like very realistic and tuned in to that that era like when he starts drinking and turns evil like you [ __ ] believe every word of it when he comes in all sweaty and [ __ ] up and just kills everybody God damn dude and how everybody's freaking out they're scared they can't pull their gun out in time and he's just blasting them one after the other that was a [ __ ] hard-hitting movie I'm have to watch it again this week maybe we'll watch it a milwauke we have a party get some [ __ ] stab him the whole [ __ ] thing I can't stab a [ __ ] at this age you can't stab the I would I wouldn't want to do it anyway but I would say but that creepy [ __ ] with they have parties and the chick don't know she's going to die that's got to be horrible you do it with like four people who have families could you imagine being sophisticated you're a millionaire you have so much to [ __ ] lose but you know that's listen man when you have money in the billions I can't imagine listen you're 50 years old you're going to go [ __ ] it I'm going to go do everything I've ever wanted to do and you write a bucket list [ __ ] on that list is getting eight chicks hottest chicks in the world getting them checked out for committee here and uh make I mean just you know Fidel used to do that they said that Fidel would go up to you whether you were married or not he'd send the [ __ ] guy over to you and say call this number tomorrow at 2:00 right in the restaurant you could be sitting there with your wife or Soldier would come up to your wife and give her a card got to call that number the next day next day a do a [ __ ] car comes to the house picks your wife up takes her for a physical examination the next day she has to have a nice dress delivered with some flowers she's going to Fidelis for some yum yums wow so you would have to just dress your wife down wouldn't you you just like make her look like [ __ ] is that real he was just steal wi I'm not sure about the wise but I know that he was doing it to women you know he was doing it to women
just you were in a restaurant you're outside he would have people going out and hunting [ __ ] from holy [ __ ] that's what you got to listen guys know a dictator yeah who knows what you do if you're put in that position you know I was watching that thing what's that crazy [ __ ] from San Francisco that made everybody drink the juice down in Guyana oh Jones you watch that thing for two hours on biography when you wake up and you can't go back to bed you had like a [ __ ] Red Bull at the club and you're watching this and and there listen I can see you talking three people but he had thousands of people that giving him the Social Security checks that guy was raking in [ __ ] he had him living in Huts you imagine I'm going to give you my money I'm going live in the huts with mosquito no air condition I got to do my own laundry what the [ __ ] yeah thousands of people who were just lost you know who just wanted a new [ __ ] life just that's mind bogging man well I mean what about the branch dividian I mean they had that place and then they would leave the compound and go to jobs and come back to the compound they all now are they making a come back I don't know no no yeah yeah something happened the son he [ __ ] okay let's find out Brans could be back they're working under a new name or something like that there a new cult let's see comeback Branch dividian comeback um I remember though when it was uh wow they were trying to make a comeback but this was 2007 yeah well they still got to be trying you know that's a long comeback I remember part of the the deal though the branch dividian deal was that he got to [ __ ] them that was like part of his kid well you know he's Jesus he's spreading the seed he's got to spread the love and you buy it you got to sit there and look at your wife and go go ahead you know our lives will be better if he gives you a [ __ ] stabbing I mean it's disgusting I know somebody who lived through that man one of those Colts and she would tell me the stories and I would sit there and ask why didn't she sue her parents in today's world I would take her parents to [ __ ] court right and the [ __ ] were you people [ __ ] thinking I mean they they track down uh they track down what do you know they trapped down [ __ ] people from all
these wars that did war crimes these are war crimes listen if a kid wants to do something he has to he has to be an adult he has to consent there's no kid that wants to grow up in Indiana in some house with 80 [ __ ] kids where they they have to eat everything they kill and they even were drinking blood pudding and [ __ ] so part of the deal was the guy [ __ ] your wife this family I'm talking about had maybe nine kids four of them belonged to the cult leader so after the cult dissolved now these people got to eat dinner in the Summers they're all on Facebook jumping up and down this guy don't look like my [ __ ] brother you know what does that do to you [ __ ] and the parents are sitting there playing the guitar jumping up and down like you know life is beautiful what the [ __ ] life is beautiful foure kids belong to some cult leader and your husband's sitting there like a [ __ ] Savage I mean these things are just disgusting this is just disgusting [ __ ] yeah they always get to [ __ ] the women that's part of the deal that's part of the [ __ ] deal and the husband's got to sit there playing the guitar making Kool-Aid like some [ __ ] jack off like some [ __ ] jack off I mean I never understood this [ __ ] well it's amazing when they study Cults how the same sort of pattern want to sling dick and that's part of it that's part of the 401K I got to [ __ ] everybody this [ __ ] it is part of it right it's a weird thing with men and they [ __ ] like 17 year olds on the cusp of being 18 I mean these guys were having that these guys should be shot I heard that that particular guy was still alive in a different state who the the F the people I'm talking about that the cult leader that they defunct from oh the still alive and they're trying to sue him and babies killed yeah he killed a few babies God yeah yeah they're disgusting after a while how many minor league Cults are there out there that we don't know about there is there gang of them millions are the Moonies still around Harry christas no the Moonies I don't know the Moonies were like an East Coast then I haven't even seen the Harry CHR lately I haven't even seen Harry Chris's lately no no with the little head nothing and Boulder they're there every other week but not no no I never see him out here they're it's a nickname
apparently I thought it was the real name it's from the unification church right yeah on young Moon and [ __ ] he was big in the 70s they can't survive man it's the Amish who who the [ __ ] know let's see recent use a 1996 article The Independent by former prime minister Edward Heath gave at a unification Church sponsored conference he admitted the term Mooney has entered the language in meaning a brainwashed bright-eyed zombie 2004 yeah I guess they're around still man huh yeah wow the unification church it's got to be harder to do on those things today though no wow I don't know if you have to get State [ __ ] approved there's some states that like allow Cults well you know as far as like religions go it's a church yeah it's a church they get like a tax deduction yeah the whole [ __ ] thing you know cuz um that's what uh that's what Alex Gray has that artist he's got a church like he's the one that does all those crazy psychedelic paintings that guy's got a church I mean this uh his whole thing is a nonprofit like he's been approved by the government which is pretty incredible we could all get approved you think so but who wants that [ __ ] creepy feeling I would never want that creepy feeling to think that I was walking on [ __ ] water oh and then you bro all of them have all become that they all become that know there's no way to look back they all become that creepy person yeah is there anyone who's ever made a cult would would worked out really good look them up I don't know I mean psychology Hollywood you know well Scientology works out good for some people you know it's worked out really good for Tom Cruz works out really good for chant Travolta works out really good for like the head actor guys and like you know people who are at the head of I mean whatever their their group of like top people in Scientology works out good for them is that a blue cigarette that you're smoking this is crack okay do you know the Bloomberg is trying to get rid of those he should I I give a [ __ ] I I don't know what why you say that look at Jenny McCarthy she took over Steven dwarf yeah I know is a new blue
cigarette person say that they went from black and white to really color super hot chick like black and white like film Noir well I guess they're doing that with this too the other one it's not ew it's so gross they're like being silly with each other ha let's smoke this ha she couldn't possibly smoke in real life and still be that hot could she is that possible she smokes really you could tell she's a smoker good googly mgly in between [ __ ] Hummers you got to do something with that [ __ ] mouth you know what I'm saying add some nicotine into those jaws in between [ __ ] she's beautiful Jen she's beautiful she really is I don't give Jim she's still pissed at Jim Cary he don't come visit the [ __ ] kids I'm done [ __ ] you I come see the kids for right right or wrong right or wrong no she's pissed listen we don't [ __ ] no more I got to come see your kid when I was eating your ass I was his best friend you know I ain't eating your ass no I'm going to come over and read him a book [ __ ] you you know it's the truth yeah it is it's hard it's a man thing to man up now he's going to go have a family I got to go over there and visit Jenny McCarthy you know she wants to smoke that pole and talk about his ventur you know you know Jenny McCarthy she'll suck your dick that's a freak I ain't mad at her I love Jenny McCarthy I've been watching her she's great she talk about how amazing you were in Ace vur yeah next thing you know she's swallowing your sword you're petting the cat everybody's [ __ ] happy get the [ __ ] out of here I can't go you know I can't be around Jenny MC once you [ __ ] Jenny MC can you imagine being around her not [ __ ] her no you're single not I'm Jenny cut it out let's go to that bedroom I'm going to [ __ ] I'm going to [ __ ] Ace Ventura to that [ __ ] door there oh my God the competition for a woman that hot is off the charts she's beautiful she's funny she's great she writes [ __ ] books she's been around she's done a lot with Playmate thing dog she's done a lot with it you got to really this chick was out of Chicago white chick came out as a comic with the Nerdist on that show when I moved to LA that show was there it was getting cast by Judy Brown stand Hope was on it the [ __ ] the the the the uh Jenny McCarthy show I read for it as remote
control no REM control on Mt no on MTV they gave sing was she on single down yeah what was remote control that wasn't her that was a game show oh there was a different one okay single that was with her and what's the nerd right yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah I remember that yeah come on now Jenny McCarthy's a bad [ __ ] dog she been around a long time man no [ __ ] dirty movies no nothing nobody's got a picture of her suing a [ __ ] nobody nobody's got a picture of Jenny mcar all they did it wouldn't hurt her she would just own no she looks beautiful she's [ __ ] hot ass that used to be that would be a deal killer for a woman back in the day it killed it almost killed the chick from Miss America what was the chick the black chick The Mix Chick they caught her eating [ __ ] on all fours look at that picture look at that picture look at that picture and what it did in 1984 to her career and that [ __ ] came out with albums bam marry the Laker bam what's her name again Vanessa Vanessa Williams Vanessa Williams she was beautiful yeah man she was fine look at the picture of her eating that [ __ ] Mona she was on the Mona she's she's on all fours she's got a [ __ ] nostrils in it yeah that's a very beautiful woman that's a beautiful woman you know now she's 50 she's 40 I mean you know I'm talking about when she was 20 she W Miss America and they took the crown from her cuz somebody [ __ ] developed those pictures on all fls was it different world now they would like encourage that [ __ ] yeah now you do that you get a [ __ ] show on the Kardashians underneath yeah and that way people would pay attention you know having something like that I mean look at Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian it made them really I mean it made them more popular and this chick had a ton of [ __ ] I mean she put out the music on every once in a while I still put the album on running back to you tremendous feel like dancing and [ __ ] 1991 92 she did movies too didn't she she did the movie with Arnold oh [ __ ] yeah what was that what was that witness he was a witness relocation plan and he took her and she stole the disc from the company and come on now yeah man she made us and then she was on some other TV show for a while wow that's a badass
[ __ ] damn that was a long ass time ago yeah she's been around for a long time but they killed her with that [ __ ] picture of her eating some poor girl having a good old yum yum time in college is she out of Texas I don't know look and see if she's out of where she's out of she's out of somewhere that you what they made her like and she's tall too is she yeah she's tall Vanessa Williams vaness there's another one an actress that was named Vanessa Williams too remember remember that I don't know remember there was two Vanessa Williams for a while it was [ __ ] confusing as [ __ ] there's Vanessa L Williams and then Vanessa Williams yeah oh okay where she from um she is from Milwood New York where'd she go to college Texas I don't know something happened in Texas something do say doesn't say but yeah she's um no I can't show that she's born in she's born in 63 so she's 50 she's 50 son of a gy now I see what she got a couple kids she still works a lot of for ABC shows she's still beautiful time is a [ __ ] dude it waits for nobody um waits for nobody oh there's another Vanessa Williams okay there's a young girl Nam you go right there look at it she next to this rock yeah she's like a pumpkin is there she's like boy this pumpkin smells fresh look how big it is fresh pumpkin yeah oh weird yeah we can't show that we get in trouble folks we can get trouble um yeah that was it's it's weird when you go back and look at like you ever watch a movie from that era like um uh I watched um what was that movie where the guy played the video game and the video game Tau starf fighter remember was yeah the guy's name was Alex Rogan I remember that because uh I'm like he's got my last name and he was a uh a guy who learned how to uh pilot this this uh this spacecraft during playing this video games like the best at it no no no no it's like star star last star fighter last star fighter last star fighter was that it yeah it was so stupid oh yeah was it what's his name in it the black dude and he was just like uh Dressed he looked all weird and creepy the black guy which black guy uh the one it says the Stars Lance guest Robert P Preston K
cuter seful Cas crew no last just look up the last star fighter I was thinking of something else and they're like they this this video game guy seemingly doomed to stay in his Char Park home all his life finds himself recruited as a gunner for an alien Defense Force it was so dumb remember what was this guy's name he was the main guy in it right yeah that was the main guy in it who who was he I forget I thought he was somebody I think you're thinking of uh Enemy Mine that's what it was and you're thinking of uh Lewis Gossett is that who it is leis Gossett Jr the guy's name you're 100% right he's the man from remember that office gentlemen [ __ ] yeah that was a great [ __ ] movie you haven't seen it took me months to watch that I couldn't get over him cuz I had a girlfriend that liked that [ __ ] so I hat him I hated that [ __ ] I went to see American jiggle and he showed his ass I lost my Edge after that and then he come out with office in the gentl I called it for on 178 Street for $5 with TAA Hearts Steven bow and the other chick that was the first big movie they gave Steven bow after the Scarface and [ __ ] offic and a Gentleman where the [ __ ] you been at an ay listen Rolling Stones bad mouth in your country he's dropping some knowledge then Luke Goss started busting out old school karate moves and [ __ ] oh that's shoan karate moves and he would like tell uh oh my God CSI Miami was in there that dude that was taking on remember he pulled him up there and choked him out and he tapped out and they threw him out of there plus the other guy was in that movie offic and the gentleman is deep dud pull up pull up the fight scene from Officer and a Gentleman there's a couple of them but when he walks up on them anybody want to come come up here how about you Maya that's right remember his name is Mayo but let me tell you what the baddest part of that movie is when you really realize who who [ __ ] Richard Gear is is the first scene when his father comes in they just had an ory his father is played by Frank Lopez scarf face Fresh Off scarf face and uh uh [ __ ] uh whatever his name is just combing his hair and Al his father comes in he moves over he takes his dick out he's pissing in front of him he goes
that was some [ __ ] night huh he goes not like those [ __ ] in Thailand I mean he was just and he goes where are you going and he goes I got drop something on you I'm a [ __ ] officer he goes look at you you ain't no [ __ ] officer remember he hits the glass and [ __ ] you ain't no [ __ ] officer look at you he goes what's your problem you might have to salute me someday [ __ ] tremendous scene he walks out where you going come on I was the only kiding that's a great [ __ ] movie a great movie that scene in the beginning that was Frank Lopez those those were that was Frank Lopez's I think it was after Scarface so he left Scarface getting shot you know they threw him out of his own there you go that's when he's trying to he's telling quit F about character I've changed I've changed since I've been here hell you have I've changed sir just polished up your a little bit you just shined it up now tell me what I want to hear I want your do no sir I what your do o I ain't going to quit spell it d o r I ain't going to quit yeah then you you can be free and you and your daddy can get drunk and go H CH d r d o r I ain't going to quit all right then you can forget it you're out that's the line right here I got nowhere else to go that's it dog I got nowhere else to go I got nowhere else to go are you [ __ ] kidding me that was incredible that was incredible dog I I forgive him for all his crazy Buddhist [ __ ] remember after 9 11 we need to use love he got on stage in New York it was like we need to use love and love them like ooh I don't know if that's the right answer we need to figure out how to stop planes from flying in the buildings before we worry about love people aren't going to be not flying planes in the buildings because you're a really good Officer and a Gentleman he uh he remember he he was he was selling belt buckles to [ __ ] those dudes the dude from CSI Miami comes up goes is it worth you making a couple dollarss get thrown out of here that's right he was selling clean belck clean belt buckles this a tremendous movie do trouble cuz he hling godamn I remember
seeing what's his name at the store one night I shook his hand he's like a big AA guy you know L Gosa Jr is he he was at the store one night man cooler than [ __ ] I shook his [ __ ] hand I said dog officing a gentleman you know you're a bad dude you've been you got a tremendous resume do you remember Good Times [ __ ] yeah I saw the father up there too we we up there together all the time I used to be a standup comic up here oh he was he was [ __ ] hilarious man John Amos John Amos he was that guy was fun dude he was so nice D good dude yeah very very [ __ ] nice man he was the first like really famous guy that I ever met that I didn't feel weird talking to no he was he gave you no judgment like he was just hanging out with you he was a fan of Comedy he respected it so that's the difference when somebody sits back there and goes dog I appreciate what the [ __ ] you do I Tri it for 3 years and it wasn't me I remember the dude from badass acting Plum Glen plumber used to always come into the store Glenn plumber who's that black dude that was in uh the movie with Shawn Pam when they did the movie about the gangs in LA and then he did a thousand things I just saw him in [ __ ] Sun anak I mean he's still working I saw him at the store he come up to me and go dog what you do and I'm going really you don't want to do it I remember hosting at the store bringing him up and I'm going dog please don't embarrass me I go you've movies with [ __ ] Andy Garcia and he's into things to do in Denver when you're dead that scene the two black dudes it's him cheet and the dude from [ __ ] uh oh this guy colors colors colors dors yeah he used to come to the store all the time that guy's excellent yeah he just got shot on Sons of anak last two seasons or something like that it's amazing John Amos was the first guy that uh that ever gave me a compliment too that that was like famous like the first guy that I ever talk to like that told me they had a good time at my at a show he was sit the back at the store [ __ ] have a great time man and he would come up to you and talk to you about bits Joey I'd loved when you did this bit oh man the way you did that remember I used to have that tiger [ __ ] bit he came up to me one night after show he goes you're so free up
there man he goes it's you're so free and I I had to figure out how to do that bit right and one of the ways that I learned how to do that bit right was like you know do a different ways and he kind of explained to me like what was good about it he he like cuz he's such a great actor like even in Good Times like like you watched that show yes [ __ ] yeah he was in root that's right he got his foot chopped off remember yes he was in Roots he he was so good as an actor like even in like a sitcom it's like he had these powerful [ __ ] moments right so when he told me it's like you know like you're so it's so free up there when you're doing that you're so free cuz you're not thinking about [ __ ] he's like you you like thinking like that tiger and I realized like that's really the way to do it you got to actually almost pretend you're a tiger like think like that thing thinks and that's the real the way it worked I kind of figured it out because of him because of him talking to me about it I was like oh yeah that's it oh that's it and it was it made me so confident because he because he said that you know I'm like Jesus John Amos said that it's got to be right it's like this is 100% like that's the guy from Roots that's the guy from Good Times that's John Amos captain or coming to America oh that's right that's right that's right that was incredible stay off the drugs that's incredible I watched omit the logic again the other night oh the Richard Pryor documentary did you watch it yeah dude that makes me nervous you got to watch when he goes to the Hollywood Bowl when he goes to the Hollywood Bowl and goes off it's amazing for some gay Foundation the people but you know man what did he do he went to the Hollywood Bowl for this pack thing Allstar lineup B Midler to support gay people and he got on out there he goes where the [ __ ] were you when you they burning once you could kiss my rich black ass [ __ ] you and he got off and the host got on I'm so embarrassed oh my God and they booing him and the next day it was in variety and [ __ ] really and how they gave him all this dough and they took it back he made Jim Brown the president of his company how much blow are you doing well he was doing a lot of things with Jim Brown Brown Jim Brown is in his act
remember like Jim telling him to get off cocaine very interesting om and yeah you know what man it makes you scared because you know that there's parts of that that relate we're Obsession in other ways you know what they are we're obsessed in other ways that whatever that doesn't have to be cocaine and weapons bro he was married seven times Jo well what about the time when he went upstairs with the [ __ ] and the guy goes the next morning he knocked on my door I go Richard what are you doing he goes I got to get a divorce you know it was just crazy that's crazy [ __ ] but that's what people don't know is when you're in that zone and you're at the comedy store and the Chinese guys are giving you drinks in the bag I can't even imagine I couldn't be I couldn't imagine being there when Kennison was there with leny Clark and there's 18 hitters in the back and everybody's drinking and Mitchy Shaw and I know we always talk about this but but we got to show the mental side of Comedy bro you got to be a Savage there's a part of you that after a certain level you have to become a Savage you really do man I'm a Savage and I'm proud of it yeah there's no way around it if you don't do it you won't survive like the the very thing that you need to become a a real comic it's like you have to have this Freedom you have to have a freedom of thinking you have this ability to go to these dark places and we we learn that from that [ __ ] crazy haunted house no I had it that's a big part you you did a little but you learned it there you learned it I learned how to talk about listen man I remember being 16 and going home you're a junior in high school I wasn't sleeping I mean at this time there was no sleep happening I just wasn't sleeping well you were doing coke I was doing coke by myself by yourself I would go home and listen to master Reality by black savath which just into the void and people getting popes hanging on a rope and I would put do the Coke and I'd probably do a little hit of musculin to or something to get me going and I'd sit in that [ __ ] corn I didn't smoke cigarettes I didn't do nothing I just go do this look I'd Rock like a [ __ ] [ __ ] back and forth I still remember that [ __ ] and I'd be like Jesus Christ this is my life I'm going to [ __ ] kill somebody listen to
this [ __ ] how many days can you stay up for before you start going crazy there's a number right three three how many days have you ever done it Coke how many days have you stayed up I've never done that you never stayed up no I never did that I still went to bed how many days have you stayed up one time I stayed up three nights Friday Saturday and by Saturday that I kept calling the police right I kept calling the police telling them that there was somebody in my house right and they kept this one I was house sitting on farway Road in Snowmass Village wow okay and I'm up there and me and my girlfriend were going off listen to this me and my girlfriend at the time are going to her brother's wedding and I'm going to meet her parents for the first time and I went to New York and I got two o of blow and I gave one to an electrici buddy of mine and I said hold an ounce of this I'm going to pick it up the night before I go to [ __ ] this wedding and I get there by 11:00 on the Thursday night I pick up the ounce I go home about 1:00 the [ __ ] calling me wow I do a line I do another line let me tell you how bad it got the dog I had at the time Hercules was probably a year old I loved him I didn't let him out of the house the whole weekend he held that piss like a soldier you understand me I didn't let him for a whole weekend he held his piss I wouldn't let him out this is how crazy I was possible who the [ __ ] cares he didn't piss I kept looking at him every time he cried that's it you ain't going out and I had no point right so I whacked off to what's the movie with the lady in red Vanessa Redgrave the lady in red the chick that was married to Steve Seagal you [ __ ] oh what is her name Michelle Leck Kelly Le Kelly Le Brock and Kelly Le Brock and woman in red shows her [ __ ] for a slip second no yes she does when when Jean Wilder calls for her when Jean Wilder calls for her she runs off the bed and they show her Bush I figured out with the VCR a lock it on a [ __ ] Bush and I'd sit there with my dick in my belly button and I'd whack it off and then I'd hear something happen and i' call the cops and after the third time they sat me down they're like listen you got to stop doing cocaine I had the cocaine hidden in the sink so if somebody happened I lift the water and
hit the compressor button but there's one tiny minute in in lady in red where she shows her [ __ ] [ __ ] she shows her red hot panties right that's the idea no she gets up off the bed it says lets her dress fly and CHS her red hot panties no it's when Jean Wilder comes calling for her and she gets up and shows that little Bush oh that drove me [ __ ] crazy I sat there she she reminded me of an old girlfriend in high school she was beautiful my God Jean Wilder Jean Wilder and her were in a movie together naked that's what I'm saying what do you think I'm talking about crazy yes I know I know what you're saying but I'm like that's crazy lady in that's what it was called lady Woman in Red I'm so sorry Woman in Red she was in Steven Seagal movies too right she was in she was in back for more whatever like back for more cuz then she started he started beating her remember I don't know yeah he started beating her and put remember she was an acupunctur is true yeah he was her acupuncturist and one day he just started beating he said [ __ ] the needle what you making [ __ ] up man no he did beat her he did something to her she's pissed she was Celebrity Rehab one of those celebrity losing weight show oh yeah yeah I'm telling you guys why come on now here yeah she's she's hot now I think Steve Seagal's third movie was with her back in danger whatever the [ __ ] with the kid they shot the kid and him with the wife and then he went to the wrench yeah she no yeah she gained the weight Steven stress man lot of goddamn stress she moved to a [ __ ] Ranch and started eating potato chips there was no stress with that Steven Seagal money she saw what he made on one of those [ __ ] movies Steven Seagal was getting paid dog for a while he was a big Mega star you know oh yeah no doubt yeah when he was doing like above the law and all those movies Above the Law is a good movie don't ever get confused they would have never gave him another eight if Above the Law in the beginning when he's doing the class of the aido dude oh yeah that's how the movie starts when he goes to that bar and starts bit slapping people with that
[ __ ] straight arm to the neck that was tremendous then he started killing Jamaicans what was the mve with the [ __ ] Jamaicans and [ __ ] I see that black dude in auditions and [ __ ] I want to shake his hand what's the mov with the Jamaicans when he went to the mall with the Colombians and the santoria [ __ ] tremendous that movie that was was that movie that was back for more to back for more to oh that's funny okay what is his uh Wikipedia we need to find out what the [ __ ] that movie is he's still banging out mov Marked for Death that's good one how many movies you think he's done take a guess Ste go 62 67 I bet he's done yeah let's see uh oh he did stunts in some earlier movies man Never Say Never Again is that a James Bond movie yeah he was a martial arts instructor in that yeah View to a Kill and then above the law was like 88 yeah that was his first movie damn this [ __ ] done a lot when I kidnapped that dude and the cops were for me I hit out with Above the Law and Lethal Weapon and I [ __ ] watched them over and over and I was blown away by Above the Law I really was I was blown look at the Jamaicans what was his name what was quiz what was the [ __ ] black one eye glass eye what was the Jamaicans name remember he killed the brother and then the brother popped up well you know oh he had a glass eye right something something weird his fight scenes in these early movies were like the first realistic fight scenes in a movie where dude was like slapping guys arms down and and [ __ ] knuckling them in the face it wasn't like these giant you know what I mean it was like more like that it wasn't like it's first time we ever saw iido but it was also it wasn't like like a giant flying split kick where he kicks two dudes at the same timeing yeah it was it was more brutal than we had ever seen in movies before like as far as like karate scenes it seemed more brutal and more realistic I never saw Stevens s movie in a black movie theater but it must be they go and they cheer for white people black people don't cheer for black people movie theaters they cheer for white people smacking the [ __ ] I saw Rambo too I saw the second Rambo on 178th Street in Harlem it was one of the funniest things I had ever when to this
day I always said it when he [ __ ] comes when he opens his eyes in the mud remember that scene when he opens his eyes in the mud he stands the German guy yes black people went [ __ ] bananas dog ban I never seen nothing like that I can't even imagine a Steven Cal movie on 78 Street back in the day we missed the window the window was in like right right about Above the Law if you got in and above the law in the 1980s and went to Harlem and watched Above the Law I bet it would be one of the most incredible experiences of your life you laugh your ass off and I saw planed the [ __ ] Apes in Philly me and Tommy junr and his girl we went to uh a theater in the middle of Philly and this was like uh when the UFC had uh fights in Philly and we got there like a day early we played pool and we got we got so high we were terrified of our own shadow and then we went to this black neighborhood it was the only way place that they had that we didn't even know we didn't know it was like an urban neighborhood until we got there but once we were in the theater we were like oh my God we're the only white people here there's like maybe like three other white people we found each other we huddled together and then we went to the movie theater but when we got in there it was hilarious man there's dudes who are artists at yelling [ __ ] out the the dudes are artists do they do it perfect oh you [ __ ] up now they they like I don't like it for the most part like people bad at itun it's got to be funny if it's funny it's brilliant yeah and some dudes try too hard the worst is when there's a funny dude and his not funny friend is like [ __ ] really loud he tries too hard like one dude will say some funny [ __ ] and then his other friends will chime in and try to like top him and they can't they don't know they don't know they're not funny yet I saw a Clint Eastwood marathon in San Francisco on the tenderloin when Clint Eastwood tells the guy to pick up the gun the and the black guy yell from the back shoot that black [ __ ] the place went down he just said shoot that black [ __ ] when the when uh white people it's amazing did you see plantet the Apes the new one no you didn't see it it's [ __ ] good Joey it's [ __ ] good I enjoyed it I know you wouldn't go see the mechanic you wouldn't go see the
was it Jason STM it was Jason STM was the mechanic wouldn't go see that out of respect when it was on television I caught the first 10 minutes of it on Showtime and I was correct you were correct they they blew it they well it wasn't as good but let me tell you something that dude who played the bad guy the dude who played his Apprentice that [ __ ] is wicked he was in that stupid vampire movie 30 Days of Night did you ever see that movie no good [ __ ] movie he ain't no Jam Michael Vincent 1973 Jam Michael throw a picture of jam Michael in 1973 he was he was taking his s out on Wilshire Boulevard and they would line up the sunset to suck that blonde especially after the movie he did not baby blue marine come on now then they put him with the ugliest man in Hollywood Charles Bronson and he went crazy right he go crazy yeah he looks like a [ __ ] truck H him he went nutty yeah poor guy he was Malibu eating pills drinking cocktails telling people he's a pilot they say that that's the place to go if you want to eat pills if you want to be like a rich old person eats pills Malu is your spot like everyone in Malu is like you know there's like a bunch of refugees from Hollywood that are older and just chewing pills now like littered in between people who like to jog and ride bikes there's like just people staring at the ocean just popping pills all day not the worst thing about those pills are what how long they stay in your system and how you don't feel it while you're eating those things not until you get off those things like when you get a prescript you get a knee surgery I feel bad because America doesn't really know this you didn't eat your vicin after your surgeries no I don't like that stuff you got to take a a leave because you know you know what it does to you it destroys your system it eats apart your [ __ ] stomach lining you got to eat tons of [ __ ] yoga with them pills are a slow [ __ ] death in this country and people have no idea I didn't but I was never really in op I ate some volumes when I snorted some coke to get the dick going you know atat some Gorilla Biscuits but there's people who eat those like that thing you always talk about that Florida road that documentary about Florida you have no [ __ ] idea you I told you do did a
16th one time my blood pressure went up I had to lay down those things are a different that synthetic heroin ain't the best thing in the world for you you might as well P it off the street and do a little bump synthetic heroin is made not to [ __ ] addict you but to [ __ ] destroy you you know it's like cocaine it's like now I go to places I enjo listen I really enjoy getting high uh Red Band I really do but guess what when you show up with a [ __ ] dab and a pipe and a [ __ ] torch and [ __ ] like that it's time for you to stop why does everybody always want to make crack out of everything I know first they did it to Coke you just couldn't snort coke no more now I got to mix it with gasoline and [ __ ] toenails put it in a jaar with paint and and smoke it no no no that's not strong enough well that's what people are always doing a guy it's just amazing now you blow him he wants to stick it to your ass now yeah well you got a good point there at least a finger but now you know they got so much [ __ ] weed stuff coming at you and it's great but I still like rolling a [ __ ] joint like I'm done I still like rolling The Joint you know what I like about rolling a joint man I like the the the like the karma the energy it's the energ it's like the try the paper I wanted to say the celebration of it but it's not the celebration the ritual that's what I I was looking for I like the ritual of like here we go like I'm preparing for it I'm getting it rolled up smoke some right now in Florida um this is the craziest statistic ever we've read it before but if you haven't heard that podcast Florida prescribes 10 times more Oxycodone pills than every other state in the country combined they're [ __ ] eating oxy down there that's a scary scary thing that that that those pills have like taken over so strong add the blow in there add the blow concept to this now oh Florida is like so medic oxycotton everywhere now you're adding blow to that [ __ ] wouldn't it be cool if they had an app to show where people are sober if like your your app like if you hold your phone it tells you if you're on heroin and just they you look I on a map like we were looking at that porn map all the cream pies and all that [ __ ] find out how what what percentage of Florida is not on pain pills right now ready go we
are not hip enough but I guarantee that we're three years behind that there is somebody right now moving kilos of cocaine online through UPS or whatever one of those systems that nobody even knows and a delivery system well you know about Silk Road have you heard about Sil I don't know nothing about nothing but I'm just saying that there's got to be somebody selling Coke on Twitter well there was an article about it um there's an article about a website that somehow or another is able to transact elicit deals and people send poop senders yeah if you want to buy any poop they got gorilla poop tur cow poop elephant crap gorilla poop why would anybody want to buy poop what look up see if there's a what is that Silk Road thing that's that's the thing that everybody talking can't look it up talk yeah you should don't talk about it whatever it's too late people know about it the government knows about it it's all over the news bedbathbeyond.com yeah something like that but there uh there's ways that people are doing it where they're they're figuring out how to but I mean how long are they going to be able to do that and then what happens if somehow in the future you know they can go back retroactively and like look up the database or who bought heroin or whatever through this [ __ ] crazy website would you sign on as Joe Rogan of course no you would not believe me no you would not so anybody who's going to buy heroin online is going to be a little crafty if they you you're going to hide your name it's like you're going to be a commenter on YouTube you're not going to go on there as Joey Diaz and say crazy [ __ ] about Taylor Swift if if you got a if you have a if you have a a Mac and you know you have a a you know I think you're controlling your heroin use you could quick a [ __ ] switch and 20 minutes later some guy delivers it to your door that you know you know them but this is the new way you don't have to call no more it seems like once there's a dis desire for something it's impossible to stop people from figuring out a way to get it to people especially if it's illegal and it only makes sense that they'd be using the internet right it's brilliant it is brilliant it's brilliant there's no way else I mean it's going to happen right I mean it's
not like anybody's going to hide that [ __ ] speak speaking of hideing that [ __ ] listen to this there was a dude in China that got arrested he uh he went to jail and because he convinced a girl that she her vagina was haunted and that he had to get rid of the ghost with his penis so they arrested him for this they they arrested him after he claimed that he could get rid of it the Paranormal Enthusiast allegedly charged $3,250 to perform the sexorcism what a brilliant man come on man that dude is a pimp and you're hating you're hating on that guy I give that guy a key to the city dog that's a [ __ ] you talk a woman at the to there's a ghost and a monkey you're a [ __ ] G you and she's got to give him money that's it's a brilliant not even [ __ ] but give him money to boo I want to see what this girl look like there's got to be a picture of this dummy not so far I don't really want to see her picture I'll be sad poor gal his name was hang gianan brilliant hang h u a n g g i got a in grammar school dog he was that little Chinese dude in the back that got [ __ ] everybody thre [ __ ] paper clips at look he's a gangster look him and now he's getting his dick sucked and getting paid oh that really is funny man that is classic that's classic type [ __ ] explain the ghost in her vagina were preventing her boss from falling in love with her oh my God check this so she must have come to him and said I want my boss to fall in love with me and so so she was a conniver man so he convinced her because the ghost in her vagina were Pro preventing her boss from falling in love with her holy [ __ ] ghost that he could easily catch with his penis how could you [ __ ] arrest that guy come on man because they don't have high five there that's rude arresting this guy for That is rude you should be able to go to go to court and you say well you're honor what I told her was that her vagina was haunted and uh the only way she's going to be able to steal her boss away from his wife is uh if uh she let me [ __ ] her and catch the ghost with my dick get the [ __ ] out of my court You' be like get your lunchbox and get the [ __ ] out you wanted to sue him for what you C
you you thought that was true you thought really he was going to get the the ghost out with his dick get the [ __ ] out of my car how can you call the cops and tell him this [ __ ] in a straight face listen I got to arrest a guy he's stuck his dick in my [ __ ] whatever had a ghost in there okay he [ __ ] totally lied to me and I guess it's the money it was the 3,250 bucks that they had a problem with but meanwhile how can they prove it she probably wrote a check how can they prove it how can they prove that he didn't get the ghost out smell it um ectoplasm smell it smell see if it smells haunted smell if it smells like a shoe it could be a rig game though she waits right till you start and she farts right in your face no they can't fart out like that it's a [ __ ] crazy world that dog you can talk people into anything well you can definitely talk some people into almost anything into anything go to a farm go to a farmers market on Sunday just pick somebody any of those like lurel Canyon Farmers Market just stay in the back there's always one go to Burning Man oh they got the Hat on the whole [ __ ] thing there how many how many people do you think you talking joining a cult if you went to Burning Man three you can have three you walk out of there with them at a leash I got to have a plan I got to have a plan where it take them you know why the reason why they have to suck your dick to drink from the anointing of the sick the whole thing they got to you know you got you got to have a plan you just can't go to Burning Man and drop knowledge on [ __ ] you got to have a plan well you have to have a little bit of a plan but then from there you can make it up as you go along and and it's tremendous because you could get a soldier and then his girlfriend and then his girlfriend then you recruit two chicks and some other [ __ ] Momo and you're off and running some one of those idiots is a trust fund baby right at least you could talk listen what can you get from your dad well he's such a pig you know he makes condoms and cigarettes and he sells them to little chin kid he's an [ __ ] I could probably get 10,000 okay get 10,000 and we get yeah I wonder how many of those people like pretend to be
kidnapped so that their dad has to send money bro I lived in Boulder and I remember kids coming to me and going listen give me a week I got to come up with 7,500 from my I remember them saying they'd work their Deads and then they'd walk around poor telling people they're poor and my God this is so hard living in Boulder meanwhile they're driving a [ __ ] Volvo with an airbag the whole [ __ ] deal well I know a dude is really rich who drives like beat up cars because he grew up rich and he like he like has a pickup truck so he drives a pickup truck on purpose like he wants to think that he's like a country guy yeah what do you well you know I'm just trying to make it and it's here a big city he's he been a millionaire that's the people you got to be scared of those are the people you got to be scared of well I think someone growing up in that kind of environment if you if you grew up with like I mean name the name Super Rich multi-billionaire parents living on yachts and you know flying away to boarding school like your your reality is so bizarre like your reality of like the potential of your future if you grow up and your parents are weapons manufacturers and your parents have an island off of Greece and you know and the dad flies out there in a G5 and they they're selling machine guns to Saudi Arabia you do breakfast at the president's house you do breakfast at [ __ ] Clinton's and you shoot your guns with Clinton and Bush comes over and he brings somebody tied up and you shoot him bro that's you know I can't even [ __ ] imagine I can't even fathom that you know being that but just think of where yeah you're right you're I've been there Joey Diaz I know you have Bohemian Grove I filmed them worshiping mik the owl God have you seen that video that he did no he did a video of him live from Bohemian Grove is like Alex Jones's one of his first videos they really do he's right they really do have like a ritual that they do there if you find it online I guarantee it's up there Alex Jones live in Bohemian Grove they they they find he goes there and these dudes they're in front of this gigantic Stone owl and they have these sticks and they say they're going to burn these sticks like it's an effigy I guess the idea behind that is the sticks are supposed
to represent a sacrifice and in the old days they actually used to take a person and light them on fire this is Alex Jones he's much younger I was there ladies and gentlemen hiding in the bushes watching this Satanic ritual take place with your tax dollars and these dudes put on robes and they go out there with torches that's that's Eyes Wide Shut that's the same shitti don't don't don't [ __ ] with the music or the sound rather what this we shall read the sign bur me once again now come on this is crazy this isuck [ __ ] beyond crazy cuz this is real so then this is no wonder Alex Jones is so crazy if you went there live and you saw this you would believe that anything is possible if there's some dude to have a bundle of sticks and is there a woman that they're pretending that they're going to sacrifice is that the idea is there a woman who's like tied up there I wish I knew the whole story well see it looks like they got like a person that they're going to pretend to sacrifice then they burn these sticks it's like what like just just knowing that that's real this was in Texas I don't know seems like it seems like it would be let's look it up Bohemian Grove hold on listen to the soundtrack this is amazing this a soundtrack of death right here listen to this no it's in California oh my God W sounded so Southern though like you're like did it it sounded you know where did this happen tell me happen so I could avoid this [ __ ] neighborhood where this happen pass viia right somewhere in Northern California this is past viia before San Francisco you k you pull over for a taco that's done Alex Jones in Bohemian Grove live famous footage this is what tuned me in to the Illuminati ladies and gentlemen there was a a dark time before that where they hid in the shadows wow this is real that's so strange I mean even if it's just for a goof if people go oh you're just misconstruing what's going on there the the the ideas just for fun who what kind of an [ __ ] stands around in a robe waiting for all this stupid [ __ ] to take place like this has taken place for over like 15 20 minutes and they're all in
orderly line like waiting on this in this very weird ritual like who would want to participate in this so the idea is that there's a Washington Post article about it if you had better music it would be cool I mean like look at that there's a bunch of fire and people dressed up and smoke but they're not even moving it's not like they're dancing like what if they had great music and they're just standing still see that's so much better that's going to get us pulled from YouTube you [ __ ] the digital signatures godamn it signal didn't you hear it oh yeah so there's an article here in the Washington post about this Bohemian Grove thing and uh these guys are standing around these gigantic redwood trees and [ __ ] and they're all these like really super rich guys it says two future US presidents Ronald Reagan and Richard Nixon are pictured with Harvey Hancock not to be confused with Herby Hancock or Herby was that the guy the Love Bug no Herby Hancock was the uh musician right Harvey Hancock standing and others at the Bohemian Grove in the summer of 1967 wow it's amazing Ronald Reagan and Richard Nixon check this out Nixon said in his Watergate tapes he said if I were to choose the speech that gave me the most pleasure and satisfaction in my political career it would be the Lakeside speech at the Bohemian Grove in 1967 because this speech traditionally was off the Record and received no publicity at the time uh but then he said that the Bohemian Grove that I attended from time to time the easterners and the others came there and it became the most [ __ ] goddamn thing I've ever you could ever imagine Richard Nixon Nixon said that yeah that San Francisco crowd that goes there it's just terrible I mean I won't shake hands with anybody from San Francisco nion said that Nixon was just a terrible human being look at this picture of uh this uh this photo of um Ronald Reagan and Richard Nixon talking to this or this guy it's really strange like they really do have a place where like these old Rich Elite guys get together and and sit down and and talk about [ __ ] like they really did have places like that where they would meet up in these special locations like that's that idea has always been like
this wanky conspiracy theory thing that the elites get together and they meet and they wear robes but no they [ __ ] really do like look at that look they're hanging around in a forest and Nixon and Ronald Reagan are there with their their dinner jackets on Colonel Sanders and couple other people it looks like John Wayne the far the lower right doesn't it yeah it looks like a little John wayes bunch of weird old dudes so strange it's to be [ __ ] black dude not one of course not it's going to be like long after these guys are gone like long me obviously Reagan and Nixon are both gone now but I mean like long long after anybody who's alive now in the future we're going to have like a just a sort of a whisper of what happened there right you know well somebody's going to find the letter there's got to be proof a picture a photograph of something something somebody's going to write some crazy [ __ ] who that chick was in that picture in 1957 she was never seen after that night tucked away in an attic somewhere it'll I'll be here say 2,700 acre compound 2ou excuse me 2,700 acre compound in Monte Rio California for two weeks of heavy drinking super secret talks Druid worship the group insists that they are simply revering the Redwoods and other rituals their purpose to escape the frontier culture or uncivilized interests of common man wow this is the [ __ ] Washington Post who wrote this the people that gather at Bohemian Grove who have included prominent Business Leaders former US presidents musicians and Oil Barons are told that weaving spiders come not here meaning that business deals are to be left outside one exception was in 1942 when planning for the Manhattan Project took place at the Grove leading to the creation of the atomic bomb godamn Joey Diaz answer me this truthfully how hard that edible kick in about 15 minutes ago I have no idea he thinks you're talking about Bohemian rap he got to a certain point where I saw him check out I saw his eyes roll back and I'm like oh okay there I'm good I'm good I've been good all day is it a chibu did chibu take deep Waters what's the 70 what what 70 milligram with a
pain I took pop one of those 70 milligrams what is a normal dose it's like 10 20 30 70 30 70 is nothing it's 175 is the DECA 175 that's 175 the one that makes people [ __ ] cringe that's scary right that's a scary one yeah that's a whole that's too scary that's a little too real you making me nervous life becomes too real I saw that movie trailer that was pulled that you were in yeah that looked really good actually pulled everything he had a great line what movie Tri [ __ ] everything do I'm not going to say what it is what are you talking about Joey is in this picture no what are you talking about from movie deal some movie [ __ ] did they put up took it down someo movie why' they take it down I have no idea one Brothers took it down but they put it up or somebody else put it up I don't know it was a leaked uh trailer oh how do you leak a trailer uh somebody that's paid to edit it gets paid $10 an hour and he just puts it online or something like that it's amazing so he made his own trailer it's amazing how he gets paid to do it he's probably at home sitting in Burbank doing it so I I got the story it's something [ __ ] unique when like the high level people who rob those movies they don't Rob the movie from the movie theater with the camera no more no they rob him they tap into Warner Brothers or Fox they or Sony they tap in like the week before the movie gets released or a month before it gets released they take the movie out it's backwards it travels backwards they have to unwind It Whatever boom back in business is that what they do so they they break into thep sites the movie is out before the movies out yeah the movies in this country Come Out 3 days before you go see them on Friday some of them do if you go into any big Market Detroit New York with [ __ ] this badass [ __ ] Tuesday you could get you could get whatever movie you want even though the movie is not coming out till Friday do you remember when you used to be able to buy them on the street and they were these VHS tapes they had they had a cover that was a copy of the real cover and it was like obviously like a printer piece of you know like a common computer printer copy I made good maybe allegedly made great money selling uh Pulp Fiction uh bootlegs on campus
you know never I've never bought a [ __ ] illegal film I was always scared to stop for those things I don't know why especially in New York City I was always just don't stop yeah it's a sketch just just a the whole [ __ ] problem you know a lot of times I bought them and they were empty there was nothing there I knew guys in the 70s that were taking boxes Like Crazy Eddie and putting [ __ ] bricks in them and wrapping them at home and they're on the corner and all a sudden you pull up and you're like what do you got and they're like speakers $50 they're 200 of the thing you're not going to unwrap them they're wrapped you're going to put them in your car you go home you get two [ __ ] bricks yeah that was real common the the pulling up and asking if you want to buy some stere equipment [ __ ] hey we had some extras yeah I don't want nothing I don't want nothing go keep driving you know they had that crazy Edie story that was brilliant it's a weird thing about Urban environments isn't it in cities like people are always there's always a scam getting run but I knew there was one point where the scam went sour there was one point where I heard you hear [ __ ] that people selling th is and the glass is broke you know you and then you just say [ __ ] it why even start going I I might get a great deal or I might get [ __ ] and I got to go back looking for the [ __ ] guy the next day for $8 is it really worth the aggravation you know but I remember going back to New York in '94 after I got divorced and a friend of mine goes uh I I got a job selling cars I need that he goes how much money you got I got about 600 bucks he took me to a building bro he took me to a building in Harlem that the top two floors were like going into the Gap wow and the the original clothes were on there with the original prices and it was like 75% off and you got it so I remember for like 600 getting three suits and a pair of shoes and two dress shirts or something you know nice suits like wow like you know because they're selling them for a third somebody robbed them off a truck but they had blenders in there they had TVs they had tables they had everything everything was brand new if you know was probably headed to Ikea something like that that who the [ __ ] knows wow they had buildings in New York when I was
growing up they'd pull up but there were guys in the neighborhood that you knew had to job with APA Trucking or one of those things one of those Trucking firms and they get [ __ ] every [ __ ] Thursday they get [ __ ] every [ __ ] Thursday when like a big when I was a kid [ __ ] the trains would move Honda Mini Trails Honda Mini trails are the best motorcycle you could buy for a kid who didn't have balls it was 50 it was 50 cc and it was automatic I had one I bought one for reals my mother bought me one for reals and then we found out that you could steal them off the train that came through IR like aana and you would go down there and somebody would jump on the train break the seal take the [ __ ] off throw into the weeds and then somebody have to come back with a truck because in those days you put those together they didn't come built the tires were on the bottom was on but you had to put the seat on you had to put the steering wheel on you had to put all that [ __ ] on them it's amazing dog so we'd found out when they were coming in and you take three or four of them keep one sold three of them they were 200 retail so that meant they were probably $85 wasn't that like a big amount of profit for like some organized crime in New York because they could steal things off the docks and then resell them some places yeah that's it it it cost you nothing it cost you nothing you could sell it for whatever the [ __ ] you want right you know you could undercut everybody why do you think stealing cocaine in the 80s is so popular because I control the market I just got 30 kilos that you're going to pay 40 for I'm going to sell for 32 when was the last time anybody ever offered you buy something that was stolen as soon as I moved to California stopped really yeah yeah soon as you move there well you stopped talking to Boon Shak alaka oh that's right yeah I just B he had two uh dildos the other day and I'm like wow these are like brand new is Boom Shakalaka or the other guy Boom the homeless guy no no no remember Bo who yeah but who's the guy with the lighters uh that's uh you got another crazy name yeah [ __ ] is he still around yeah I just saw him the other day no he's not still he hangs
out at the rainbow now but and mels but but bshock like had this dildo and I'm like wow this looks like brand new and I'm like but it's not why am I touching it what the [ __ ] do you remember that Kennison talked about the Roxy way back or the rainbow way back in his [ __ ] HBO special that's how crazy the rainbow's been did you see the Sunset Strip movie I told you about did I tell you about this no Sunset Strip just came out on Showtime on demand I think you could also get on iTunes it's a documentary about sunstrip starting from the beginning all the way through the mafia all the way through ceros it goes through into all the [ __ ] about the the the hooker houses that were everywhere I had no idea about like there was like Pro uh whatever like houses that rich people would go to and just had tons of hookers in it and uh you you you it talks about everything and you go buy it and you're just like by going by these buildings that you go by every day like holy [ __ ] that was the hooker house then yeah it came out in in 2012 got mad review views man oh it's got amazing people in it it's got an amazing uh review online it says a documentary on the famous Los Angeles Street wow yeah so yeah it's got five stars or four stars here yeah I'm getting that [ __ ] tonight is it available on uh iTunes yep it's uh really well done there's a lot of people in it and uh if there is a place in in like the world that I've ever been to that I feel like is haunted with the memories of the past not necessarily haunted but haunted with the the memories of the past it's that area yeah they talk about that a lot the haunted aspect of yeah and they talk about how it used to be like poppy not poppy fields like something weird here's actually Sunset Boulevard famous Boulevard glorified in movie song and story where are you walk they go through a lot [Music] before comedy wow from dhini to Crescent Heights there's a lot of ghosts I believe in sacred places and I believe that this is It's a sacred place that strip is like where you leave and where you come back but this is where it all started you know the feeling is still there it's a very yeah you can almost
taste it it was about titilation and sex Hollywood itself is a magnet has great feminine appeal sexual appeal and the strip is kind of the personification of that your dreams can start out there and your dream will end there you know if you don't watch your [ __ ] you will die that night and it will be because ofas Mickey rock yeah he was talking to that other guy and it was just a weird combo who was the other guy uh Johnny Deb no I think it's that guy that's also comic God damn this looks amazing here could not have happened any place else and don't you ever forget it you [ __ ] it was so alive honestly I mean you iton kids Viper Room the c is now in a nobody would ever come by and be like you guys can't do that here are you crazy it seems like this is a place where people sort of come for Refuge Sunset Strip is a civilization for the Brokenhearted the mistreated the overlooked the underloved and the doomed if they going to die you might as well die here die in front of all of us why is that got makeup write songs it's like the mayor Sunset Strip or something weird like that but why is he I don't know okay wow that looks badass though that looks bad I just realized how fortunate I am to have been able to perform there like it just hit me like Jesus you go back I go to Laugh Factory from time to time would you go back to the store no never no what if I guys if you guys came with me no what the [ __ ] would that doing just kidding what are you do you are you a Ghostbuster yeah I go a Dom show on Tuesday yeah Dom show on Tuesday is great well he does he like has a fun thing he does it's not just standup he [ __ ] around with the crowd a lot you know he tortures them oh yeah yeah yeah he lets people well he's great at that you know and he does his podcast from there too sometimes you know I did the podcast I did it once with Jamie M once once I got to call him go so if you you guys went back to The Comedy Store like seriously that would be one of the most amazing things ever just just like having like the Rogan Diaz Tuesday spot like in the main room sold out every week and it's not happening be awesome yeah but why would we do it there we do it at the ice house tomorrow night boom Joey Diaz is doing his podcast there and then boom I'm there with Eddie if and
Brian Ken tomorrow 10 p.m ice pasaden see the difference is the the energy at the ice house is all like there's a long history of it and there's also what we bring there and what we've been bringing there there's plenty of Spirits at the Ice House son it's just not negative there's no murdered people there's no like holes in the [ __ ] basement covered in cement with dead people that but what people don't realize we're not exaggerating it was C's nightclub it was owned by Bugsy Seagle Bugsy seagull I mean that guy was a gangster that guy had to have killed people that's back when you could just kill people and that dirty crazy street that nutty energy that that place has it only makes sense that people died there the piano player Jeff Scott recently posted on his Facebook the tunnel going uh underneath the street where they used to like take the bodies underneath to where it used to be yeah to the house the house of yeah that was well I don't know if it's true but that was the rumor always was that in the back of the main room there was a doorway to a tunnel and the tunnel led up the hill to Crest Hill where the Mansion was CU there were the property was sold together allegedly but that's like one of those things like [ __ ] kabad crane well there is a tunnel but is that true is that's true there's a lot of [ __ ] see right now if they have a tunnel somebody died that's all you need know there's a lot of [ __ ] down there there's a room down there goes this way and it cuts across and they could keep going into different things there's a lot of [ __ ] down there shooting the shooting holes well one of the uh ideas in um this questions everything show was to go uh and spend the night at a haunted house and I was thinking this there's no better place to stay The Comedy Store basem at The Comedy Store too yeah that would be terrifying that would I [ __ ] my pants called Carl theau used to tell a story on stage about how the time where when he was young we'll have him come in here and tell it someday um when he was young uh he was staying at the store and he's at the store like his wife kicked him out or something like that and and he got he was forced to stay at the store so he was sleeping on the stage like this I'm here to make my dreams happen man I'm not letting some chick get in my way so
I'm just going to lie down here and he said he was lying down he told it on stage it was like a Halloween show we had in the main room it was [ __ ] great and he was like and so I'm on stage and I hear clink clink clink like there's chairs moving it is piss Mitch black and I'm like hey hey it's me Carl you know I had uh had nowhere else to stay silence this is when he was a dorant back then you know like right before kenneson had even made it and he said he heard another clink clink like he heard another chair and they said then out of nowhere two hands grabbed his legs and dragged him to the edge of the stairs and he said there was no one there he said he didn't see anything by the time he he got up he he scrambled the person whatever it was just disappeared and he said he freaked out ran out of there it's a great story it could have been easily been booting Shakalaka you know I saw Kenn there I saw Kenn in there one night did you really I saw Kennis in there one night you saw him perform there no I saw him by the belly room going up the stairs one night what do you mean you saw a ghost you're you're shaking your head yes come out of a [ __ ] no I was sitting there watching I was up next did up next I was next to the other two and I was standing by that thing there and I kept seeing there's a light on the top of the belly room there's a big red light dog and you there watching the comic and I had like two away so it was that comic and one more before me and I was watching waiting killing time and I kept seeing something keep going past my eye you see the light from how many days did you been awake no it wasn't no days I I didn't do blow and go on stage I did blow when I got off stage and I'm sitting there going what the [ __ ] is this light finally I look up you know how he wore that stupid Long Jacket yeah it was like I saw the tail end of the jacket I went upstairs there was nobody up there dog I saw it I saw it with my own two [ __ ] eyes I never felt no I never got chased nobody pulled me dice has a story where he was upstairs and they heard them banging on the door uh ccie uh Cory quo has a story where she heard uh music in the [ __ ] main room like old band music like the Titanic type music with who was the older guy
that was a a veteran Brett um something right now I know a lot of people heard different things there you know I didn't I never got touch the pulled I know that the original room has a weird energy and you're right the sunset trip does have something special there's something there there's something there there's something that there's something that points at that comedy store that the big mistake they're going to do is they're going to knock that down and build something over it and it's going to be like a carrier movie the hands going to come out of the ground you know I mean that's the truth guys there's something there somebody committed suicide there people gave their lives there how many people died and didn't make it as Comics that are [ __ ] sure it's haunted how about the guy who jumped off the roof sure that [ __ ] place is haunted remember they had the uh they had the strike yeah yeah sure it's haunted you know that building in Gardener all those buildings people on those buildings bro people that the straight legit people say this block is haunted on Gardener behind el padre all those buildings there they're haunted how many people kill themselves those buildings coming out here look at this [ __ ] young kid that iced himself last week from a Disney show 29 years old he's on [ __ ] rulian Isles [ __ ] black kid 29 years old with a shotgun I go to do the podcast for Le I go to make a right and there's cops all my [ __ ] corner he live in that [ __ ] building there all right what possesses people he wasn't on drugs that kid I used to go down to one hop condo with that kid what possesses people to do that [ __ ] who knows that's Hollywood that's Hollywood you know how many Judy canot is back at the haha Cafe why would Judy kotti try to make a comeback don't say she's going to sue you I don't give she Su Dum dude I just saw fight that lasted like 30 minutes and yelling these people come out here and they get crazy man and you know I'm very happy I was talking to a Graham Elwood called to invite us to the podcast convention and I go Graham do you know that me and you with the same manager in 2000 we're still here whether we're [ __ ] rich successful we're on a TV show we're still here no car crashes we have an OED we're here how [ __ ] lucky a we dog oh we're very lucky to
have gone through what we've gone through at the store and having a great time in the comedy that I just saw that I had goosebumps I'm a [ __ ] fat ex-felon from North Bergen New Jersey I was at The Comedy Store doing blow developing getting better seeing the [ __ ] world walking to the store walking from the union on Tuesday night to the store and walking back to Laugh Factory remember we used to walk to the standard all the time the standard eat the blue cheese burgers [ __ ] delicious come on Inc I remember that [ __ ] idiot that sold the the lighters the first weekend that's the guy yeah yeah the first monkey ball the first Monday I was ever here I walked into the [ __ ] Comedy Store and Don Paris put me on stage thank God I knew Eddie Griffin he put me on a Monday night Don Paris still had the shorts on still had the balloons on Wow and the next day they told me to go to the Laugh Factory that's where you went on Tuesday and you stood online all day and you did 3 minutes and I stood online all day guess who was online with me all day monkey balls and he knew the whole history of comedy in La who you had a sign with who was going to see you I thought this guy was a master comic and he went on stage and he lost his voice I never laughed so hard in all my life he went up there and all sudden all day he's talking telling stories now he's like me me me me me me me dying that was monkey balls then he became a lighter salesman and rings and Wheels beat him yeah he always had those lighters with titties at him here's Brian Ken and Don bars yeah Brian Ken and Don bars have this thing where Don bars pretends to bang Brian Callen in his booty hole he gets his pants down and everything and they they have this thing they act it out and it's so realistic he presses he presses C's mouth against his [ __ ] like he makes it like he's pulling his [ __ ] out and jerks off on him and finishes it Beau and it's it's made extra special by the fact that Don bars without wearing a costume is doing this in a jumpsuit he wears a track suit naturally like it's not like he dressed up for this role where he could pull his [ __ ] out really easy no it's just it's a part of his thing and on top of that Don Baris is rumored to have a [ __ ] the size of your arm it's huge that's what I
understand that's the rumor every time he's been about to pull it out on stage I get out of the room I don't want I don't want to get depressed that's the one thing man I mean if you don't a giant dick and another guy has a giant dick you're like well well what the hell I mean you could always get rich you know make enough money you could buy a nice house too but if a guy's got a giant dick he's got a giant dick he's got a it was I forget it was like a year ago or something like that he had a boner for some reason he wanted to show a girl in the audience and he was just like outlining it with his hand like look how big this is honey you know like he's just like trying to like it's like a 12in dick right it was huge it's a giant fat dick it's not a skinny 12 in either it's not like one of those white guys in the movies where it's long but you're like yeah but it's like it's tapered the beginning the end of it is like small it's weird you know there's some long dicks that aren't impressive Don bars is a dick it looks like a big German dick you know like a big Austrian dick which which You' imagine some [ __ ] hiker would have just Joey Dan is done look at him's thinking about Dick sh he's shaking his head like yeah yeah I understand I understand [ __ ] I got a big dick too [ __ ] I need this [ __ ] talk about D we don't need this [ __ ] if anybody need this [ __ ] listen is there any more tickets to you Wednesday night at the ice house yes there are 626 5771 1890 whatever the [ __ ] it is so Joey is at the Ice House 8:30 and then you come on at 10 stick around man do a spot do a spot next door he's not going to he's not going to do two shows on the night I'm done most likely happen home I'm gonna go home and oh Carlos KH do it tomorrow I got time for that yes tomorrow night Martin campman versus andos against car cowboy Cerrone yes yes so there a great [ __ ] card night then we're going to Milwaukee yes and we got a great show at the paps there's only 100 tickets left it's going to rock last time we had six Circles of people smoking reefa Bazookas eating Edibles somebody made a trade black security was going to [ __ ] take Rogan home they were hugging him and [ __ ] oh they were the nicest people nicest [ __ ] people ever those girls they took care of me we
made a video of it yeah so I'm looking forward to going to Milwaukee thank you for coming out we're going to have a [ __ ] blast [ __ ] we're going to have a great time but I'm going to got them on Friday the 13th Joe Rogan so going have to don't think that we don't appreciate the [ __ ] out of you guys that's right we do you know we talk about it all the time we know that we're incredibly lucky and that we're in this weird situation where we have like the the nicest I don't want to call them fans the people that come out to these shows they're the nicest people period just humans family they're they're just it's in the the atmosphere is just cool as [ __ ] after the shows there's a few people get real nervous and their hands get sweaty and that those they're strange I love them I don't give a [ __ ] come on down just put deodorant on don't be hugging me with a [ __ ] stink bomb under your shirt typ how many times though when you take pictures of dudes they're just completely sweaty I'm sweaty too so I don't give and I tell them when women touch me I get all nervous I tell them please don't touch me cuz I'm sweaty and they don't give a [ __ ] so [ __ ] they want to touch you and you go home and take the shirt off and put it on the couch the next day just take a whiff of it it smells like [ __ ] a chick with the Ghost and the snatched that's yeah this is the the chicks that took care of us last time look at this this is going to be bossing Milwaukee don't [ __ ] sleep on it they kept the line going they kept every in line cuz we've been come after shows we'll meet people and we we've been doing it for forever like I don't know man I don't know how it started how it started where we just hang around after shows but it was a long ass time ago it don't matter come and we hang out afterward that's all it makes me well you know we decided and we even talked about it we decided that it's uh even if we want to leave like it's it's way better for them if they get to hang out and take a picture with us and get to meet us it's a better experience you know so that's like it's part of the experience is uh they they go to the show they have a good time and then you know afterwards we'll hang around with them and and talk to them and take photos with them and it's so it's not
just you know you're not just we're not just doing a comedy show and then getting the [ __ ] out of there like uh we appreciate you guys coming as well then when I walk into the UFC people start yelling D and you're like hi you're like no no no no come on you [ __ ] those people at the UFC are crazy and sometimes I have to leave like I do interviews afterwards and they're screaming stay like I can't I got to go they're going to [ __ ] dragging me out of here they'll they'll keep you there forever they bribe the security and let them get up front oh no it's great man I love every [ __ ] minute of it I really do I well this the the UFC too they give a lot of access to fans those fan Expos and q&as hey man that's the way it's supposed to be happy and and now other leagues are learning from Dana White that's what you got to do to be successful people want the full experience people will pay to get [ __ ] armbarred by Chuck Lidell and you know what so would I so I if you're a fan who you go to The Fan Expo learn how to roll I don't care whether you're a white belt or brown belt they're not going to kill you they're going you going to get one great thing out of it in a picture the memory for life I can never do that you know I went to jul I went to like uh Willis Reed's basketball camp there was no pictures then you didn't take a picture with nobody you wear was all from memory he signed the T-shirt big [ __ ] deal Carlos condid had a great video of him uh sparring with guys like uh rolling with guys he went to uh like an army base yeah Richie Rich Frank done it too they'll go and they'll roll with people yeah Henderson's done it a bunch of times yeah Henry Gracie did it too they go and they'll go to a Bas that's right Frank Mir against baby face assassin who else is on this card uh we got Milwaukee yeah we got a great card we got my man [ __ ] clay Guida against uh who the [ __ ] is oh oh the Spanish kid the one that lost to Aldo in Brazil he's part of Team Alpha Male uh Dwayne bang trains him um which one little kid little kid he lost to Jose Aldo the knee to the face oh Chad Mendes Chad Mendes is fighting is fighting 45 yeah he's fighting Chad Mendes yeah baby yeah baby we got some good [ __ ] fights this weekend yeah I'll read the card off to
you right now yeah yeah give me the undercard baby I don't know what the [ __ ] okay here we got oh Jesus we got a lot of [ __ ] Brandon ver versus Ben Rothwell godamn holy [ __ ] that's a crazy fight man I forgot about that one Eric KO versus Dustin Pang there you go there you go God damn Barnett versus Klay Guida versus Chad Mendes Jamie Varner versus glaz and tbal oh [ __ ] this is a great [ __ ] great fing card and then of course the the title fight Benson Henderson versus Anthony Pettis that is [ __ ] nut Duke Rufus will be there Friday jumping up and down and [ __ ] throwing Sidekicks for Jesus that's an amazing Fight Man Henderson versus Anthony Pettis is going to be [ __ ] Insanity you know Pettis has a 56% KO rate 56% that motherfucker's a beast I forgot he [ __ ] up Joe loar Jesus yeah dude with a head kick how about Donald Cerrone [ __ ] him up with a body kick no no no he's his left leg is nasty man he's a bad [ __ ] he remember when he hits Cerrone with that crazy knee too the showtime knee he bounces off the cage and and Pops his knee through a small opening and catches him in the face that kid's Wild Man and so's Henderson Henderson's a [ __ ] beast he's only gotten better since he won the title it's only gotten better since he lost the title to pennis aming he's a different fight when he lost to Pettis BR this is going to be amazing this going to be a great weekend going to be amaz excited yeah this is It's a sick sick card sick weekend so we'll see you guys at the paps theater and we'll see you tomorrow night at the ice house and also tomorrow we're going to have a podcast here with the one and only Everlast and Everlast uh has released a new um he released a new acoustic only CD and he got the idea from doing it from performing on podcast from getting on our podcast and and doing it for the first time performing you know acoustic like that and getting this massive reaction so all all the love is what inspired him yeah he actually pulled me last time he was here he pulled me into the car and goes Bri I need something to tell you something and he showed me because supposedly I I hope it's still on there but he said uh we talked about I said that you should do like a how that one song jump jump up and get down
you should do an acoustic version of that he's like no I hate those songs but he's like he played it for me in his car and he's like how is this and I was like what the f awesome did I used a lot say that is that you breaking I mean it's out now right any laws no I think it is out I think it's out right now I think it came out uh today I think it it's out Tuesday that's cool yeah it's going to be sick he's I I like him acoustically even better than house pain me too and I think House of Pain's amaz what is that song uh Little Miss America that one song they had God damn that's a good [ __ ] song and ever since what it's like like people like caught his his his acoustic [ __ ] is like way deeper it's way more emotional and touching Jump Around is always going to be like an Anthem it's always going to be like a cool song it's awesome or the the version he played it for me can I pump my uh dates yeah uh I'm going to be uh with Tony henchcliffe uh September 26 at standup live at Phoenix Arizona in the following day I'm going to Ohio Columbus Ohio at Woodland's Backyard with Tom sigura Christina pitsky and Tony and me all right we'll see you jty freaks tomorrow and uh May Odin bless you all we love the [ __ ] out of you see you soon sponsors they can go [ __ ] themselves they know who they are listen stamps.com enter in the code word JRE go to on it.com use the code word Rogan uh audible.com Joe we love the [ __ ] out of you guys we'll see you [Music] soon for