Video URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ij1j0R4V0Cc
this should be actually happening it says live in recording but I'm a [ __ ] idiot so I don't know if that's true um if this is all bad ladies and gentlemen I did not plan this out this well and I'm trying to do this myself just me and my man Brian but I really need my little buddy redband to help me out with the technical [ __ ] cuz I don't know what the [ __ ] is going on so I got to go online to see if it is actually online no I don't want to go social with your [ __ ] Facebook it seems like it's on we're on we're live yes fantastic The Joe Rogan Experience Podcast is brought to you by on it.com on it.com has some uh a bunch of new [ __ ] in uh first of all the hemp protein powder which is uh Sensational very delicious I use it do you use it the hemp proteins to [ __ ] I got to give you some of this hemp Force stuff it's sweetened with stevia really and yeah it's got raw cocoa in it I'm not a good spokesman for protein powder though it's not like look at Brian K I took a show dud what do you do do you dance do you dance in the rain got dancer physique if you if you want to dance physique try H protein P Brian Ken he's a dancer in the rain that's the that's the that's the commercial for hemp protein po me dancing in the rain cuz cuz I look good wet when rain Pitter patters off my body have you uh ever tried battle ropes uh you mean the the ropes this I have some in my house I call them you call them battle ropes I call them muscle ropes dude dude they're the [ __ ] that's the new thing we uh we just started selling them at on it uh that's a one of the other items people like oh it's so [ __ ] expensive for a rope I'm telling you it's not all right it's it's just cheap as you can buy you cannot buy battle ropes online cheaper than the ones we're selling ropes are [ __ ] expensive when you're getting 40 ft of giant thick ass rope that's not cheap and it comes out to be like 100 bucks or something like that the same thing as kettle bells the kettle bells that we're selling they're not cheap but here's the deal first of all they [ __ ] will last you forever you won't ever need other gym equipment you need a chin up bar and some [ __ ] kettle bells if you want to be in some badass shape those kettle bells will last you for a liftime for a lifetime you will be able to have
there's so many different exercises you can do with kettle bells just looking off a YouTube there's [ __ ] hundreds of different things you can do these cannonballs with handles on them are the [ __ ] they're [ __ ] the most manly [ __ ] ever for working out you feel like you're [ __ ] like you're some crazy Russian dude wor the worst workout I ever did was I had to push a weighted sled then do then do the battle ropes I call them muscle ropes and then do kettle bells I I've you know wrestling all of it I've never in my life Jiu-Jitsu I've never ever wanted to die and it was by the way it was an uh six and half minute workout oh here comes Brian uhoh he must know we're online now 6 and a half minute workout let's do this online with him okay all right hey little fella oops here we go hey little fella we're on the air right now what you sleeping how dare you um I'm in a panic because I can't get I guess it doesn't matter but I can't get that dissolve thing to work where you can't see the text at the bottom of the screen screen yeah you know how you can make the text Fade Out how do I do that should I sing background music while you do this techical stuff his name is okay in right click on the scene that you're on [Music] okay uhhuh edit shot lashes it's a really nice contrast he's got a WI see I don't see that that's where it's confusing just to no I have it's just you I was trying to put Brian's name up because it's your name on it he's got shoulders for days and a really wide oh shoulders for days and a really wide so what should I do the last one is Christina pitsky and it's got like uh names on it oh the last scene on the far right that one's just me now and forth from Brian to me that would be sexy yeah with what I'm on thank you for bearing with us in this technical break ladies and gentlemen I'm going to keep singing a song about Joe roin he's got a okay well we'll have to deal with this but um
so the um the text there's no way to get rid of that text on the screen flexible his name is Joe Rogan he's got a wide face and a short neck wide face and a short neck see I don't see that though when I'm trying to do that I can't it's not letting me do that means he can absorb punches really well should have been a fighter Bud ladies and gentlemen at home this is boring as [ __ ] I'm sure I'm singing it shows logic camera logic camera built-in eyesight those are the options I'm singing background music dude built-in input uh it shouldn't be anything on it should have been a gymnast he should have been a gy I don't know what the [ __ ] I'm doing dude we're gonna have to have you uh get in there this is a good job security for you the whole show goes to [ __ ] without red band okay all right well now for some reason it says Eddie Bravo I must have changed it I don't mind being Eddie Bravo okay this is Eddie Bravo now he used to well we just giving plugs to our friends I'll be at the American uh Comedy Club oh yeah let me check Thursday Friday Saturday Sunday everybody I'll be at the American Comedy th Friday sat yeah I should turn on my volume are you what you are you talking Diego I'm just uh giving I'm just uh um I'm talking to Brian Callen he's talking on the podcast same I'm singing songs about you his name is Joe Rog and he's got a wide back we're just trying to see if this thing is actually online he's got long eyelashes and he's really flexible he can do Impressions nobody knows that his Joe run his really muscular got a wide face wide face and a short neck which means he can take a punch to his [ __ ] nose better than you can his name is joro joro I'm trying to come up with other words oh yeah okay it's working it's working all right all right buddy I'll see you uh tomorrow Jamie Killam later bye let me can I plug my gig this weekend oh dude we're gonna plug the [ __ ] out of your gig this week let's not do it here because this is uh only the commercials let's do it uh when we get to the podcast keep going we're going to plug the [ __ ] out of you son Fu it ladies and Gentlemen The JO Rogan podcast what is
it called The Experience something like that know what the [ __ ] this is it's why label it do I have to label maybe I'm going to not label them anymore I'm going to stop calling it The Joe Rogan Experience I want to call my podcast the man thoughts the problem if if you don't label it you can't sell t-shirts that's right well you got to make your bumper stick money dog You Ain't Got No Label dog the label don't take man thoughts that's mine all right man Thoughts by Brian I like it SE podcast right it sounds powerful I'm going from Brian K show to man thoughts you should be you doing [ __ ] battle ropes that should be like your avatar exactly just you with battle ropes dude look at that guy swing look at Brian does he play golf or what [ __ ] Conan the Barbarian people were calling you dehydrated Joe Rogan because we pranked uh Will Sasso Will Sasso we um Will Sasso on the 10-minute podcast he goes he he goes That's My podcast by the way and he goes um he goes uh you're you're like Joe Rogan before you add the water we did we [ __ ] around with the crowd you could watch the video of it I actually put the video of it on YouTube oh yeah it was great um well yeah I'll I'll I'll I'll talk about that when we're done with this commercial uh anyway go go to an.com check out the kettle bells check out the battle ropes the new hemp protein pouty pouty what is that F what kind of a spokesman am I Jesus Christ I haven't had my Alpha Brain ladies and gentlemen I haven't I'm going to have some right now I I I take them right before I do the show I don't even know if it helps well you know what at least you you do your own products you use kettle bells muscle ropes and you take your own product so here here beautiful there they are ladies and gentlemen dude I take it because it's it's awesome if they didn't if I if they were on my own product I'd still taken I'm addicted to it so is Lorenzo fatia owner of the UFC he's addicted to this [ __ ] every time he sees him he goes dude this [ __ ] Alpha brain's incredible cuz when you fly around yeah a lot one of the things that happens I'm taking him right now how many did you take for God's sake four I'm a Savage you're an extremist I am a little bit right I might be a little crazy my you're my canary in the
coal mine dude everything you do I'm always like is it safe is it safe podcast is it safe all right I'll do it now stand up I guess I'll I'll do it again remember we'll talk about this later this is the [ __ ] commercial BR count sorry sorry sorry it's for godamn on it.com that's o nnit t um and what is alpab brain that I just took it's it's a it's a combinatory sort of a supplement it's all a bunch of different neutop and what neutop are is nutrients that have been shown to have a positive effect on brain function and you can take go to an it.com and there is a plethora of information on this subject and look at Google too because it's a controversial subject and you know some people are not into it and you know they don't want they don't want to believe that supplements can help them and that's fine I'm not I am not pushing it on anybody that's not interested but if you're a person that does supplement your vitamins and if you're a person like me who absolutely knows that it affects your health it it does I sometimes don't get enough nutrients from my food you know in a perfect world we would all be eating mineral Rich vegetables and uh we would all be getting the perfect amount of water and we would all be having you know the best food ever and grass-fed diet but the reality is it doesn't always [ __ ] work out that way and a lot of things get affected by not supplementing uh I think uh I have it is most certainly enhance my health and the supplements that I've been most interested in are neut tropics and this along with uh neuro1 which is Bill Romanowski formula that was the one I first discovered Bill Romanowski great great middle linebacker he had problems with concussions did and he developed these uh this this series of supplements to Aid himself like it was his idea to ate himself and I took a [ __ ] because noname who was a radio DJ uh in San Francisco a few years back he was raving about this guy and it's the formula was pretty pretty interesting he has a little caffeine in it I believe um which I didn't want in in alpab brain you know I think caffeine is something that's kind of tricky it it absolutely can help your brain function but I don't think it should be in anything unless it's obvious you know I mean like caffeine I think
should be in coffee CA be you take something with a lot of caffeine and feel like wow this is what's working well you [ __ ] up and you don't read the label and you take it while you're taking coffee and you have a goddamn heart attack that's that that was what e federan did yeah right a lot of those people that are on good di pills yeah all this stuff that we we're we're talking about here folks is all vitamins it's nothing that you have to worry about it's nothing that's dangerous and the thing with on it is we want to make sure that nobody ever feels ripped off so your first 30 pills it's 100% money back guarantee you don't even have to return the product that's how confident one we are of the product and we know that you're going to enjoy it and two uh how the the the ethics of this company is nobody wants anybody to feel ripped off we want to sell you the best [ __ ] that we can find the best supplements as far as as health and and athletic performance and the best nutrients we can find the best weight lifting equipment that we can find we use Troy kettle bells they're the best in the world they're perfect you can't get anything better they're the highest quality available they will [ __ ] last through the apocalypse you buy those [ __ ] you're done you're done you have them forever they will never wear out they're cast iron [ __ ] cannonballs they're awesome so this stuff is not cheap um but we're selling it at the most reasonable rate that we can and we're trying to provide everybody with the best possible products that we can that's the ethics of on it and that's what we're all about um and if you use a code named Rogan you will save 10% off all supplements all right you freaks Brian K's here and I don't know how to turn the music on podcast just think of like heavy guitars and wind blowing my hair back it's the [ __ ] podcast it's the Brian Cs on the podcast with Joe run that was the that was a very interesting way of dance right there was like it was like a gay Kenyon Dance I'm I'm bringing I'm bringing back some [ __ ] from like the 70s you know that if you cook in cast iron if you cook in cast iron you it's an excellent way of getting iron into your diet which I didn't know yes yes they say stakes in cast iron like you
sear a steak IR but get too much Ferris oxide in your diet you have to be careful so Tim Ferris says in his book that a lot of these guys will like actually take a day and eat no iron to kind yes to bring their iron levels down so there it is see wow yeah Ferris is fascinating we've been uh going back and forth he's going to come back on the podcast podast well let's do it let's hook it up he's a great guy I got to get him on cuz I had a conversation with him after I read his book and I loved him and he just knows so much yeah he's uh apparently got a lot of stuff cooking and he's in the middle of writing a book as well but um man I love talking to him I just love talking to dudes that that are just filled with information like Rob Wolf the the Paleo Solution author what was that like [ __ ] great you know because I'm reading the GU filled with information it's controversial well but I I just I just read The China Study I talked to you about it which is about he's a very very credible science and he looks at a lot of science that says Whole Food uh a plant-based whole food diet is the best way to go problem is that I think like we talked about if you're doing sports and lifting personally I went I went like about uh a week eating just a whole food plant-based diet I ate a steak the other day I I I I woed it down I inhaled it I it was literally like I was like like man and I've never felt better man I mean I just need some meat sometimes I don't think that you can have the same diet for every person I don't think I don't think everybody needs I don't need a steak there's a lot of chicks out there that don't need a steak they really don't there's a lot of dudes that don't need a steak Jamie kilstein's coming on the podcast tomorrow he's a vegan he's healthy he's happy and he loves it his real Fitness he's always constantly doing martial arts Jiu-Jitsu and [ __ ] and he's a vegan weighs eight pounds but he's a vegan I'm not kidding he weighs eight pounds well I always look at it I always look you can't find too many Olympic athletes uh who are vegans well M danzic who's also going to do the podcast we're going back and forth I love that dude he's a really really interesting guy he's a UFC fighter who's a vegan he's also a photographer and uh you know he works
his his reasons are that he loves animals you know that's I respect and I respect that as well look I uh I love animals too there's a cycle of life and I think factory farming is horrific but I think Wild game I think that's where it's at I think in a perfect world we would uh buy meat from hunters and that would be a new [ __ ] industry we'd have to make sure that people weren't poaching buy meat from Hunters I think you should be able to hunt a lot of them because here are [ __ ] everywhere the idea that there's a they're glorified cows dude yeah and we can grow more of them too by the way we can grow more of them when they but my point is when they're wild and they're running around and then you just hunt them and kill them that I think first of all that's it's the whole thing is way more Humane because they lived the real life they lived a real life that is no the deer never lived a better life they have one life that life Forge for food stay alive if you do that you've won they're also by the way they're also they are food in the wild I me one of the things course that's why they're there one of the Joseph Campbell always said that one of the one of the problems with original the original sort of peoples in their mythology was that they they would look around at nature and realize that life ate life and if you look at a lot of like uh whether it's Native Americans or whatever the the the traditions of killing animals they were always fairly most cultures were always fairly very uneasy with killing an animal which was why when you killed an animal there was a ritual around that there was usually prayer said there was rituals cuz human beings were like they felt the connection yeah were taken and and when you actually have to kill something with a spear or a bow and arrow or a knife and you feel its heartbeat and you smell that animal that's that's very intimate it's very it's physically intimate it's very and almost all um almost all original Aboriginal cultures had and all that I can think of had a sort of a ritual around that they would say prayers they they do all kinds of things because it makes sense what we've become is so removed from our food we're so removed with factory farming and things it feeds a lot of people gets a lot of protein and people people don't go
hungry anymore I always remind people 30 years 30 years ago I mean half of half of India a lot of China went to Major famines uh and certainly most of Africa but now that's that's becoming more and more a relic of the past it's because we become very efficient at at getting food to a maximum number of people but there's a discon there's a huge disconnection so when you eat a pig when you eat bacon that's been in in a gestation crate you know and goes crazy because it's chewing on the bars you're not really thinking about it man I'm just I'm just hungry you're not thinking it's a pig you're thinking it's just a piece of ham we've actually given these really euphemistic names to uh meat having said that I yeah it is we we we do that beef ham you know you don't think ve ve if you ever go to a farm though and you're like playing around with the Lambs and the goats and [ __ ] I mean and playing around with them but you start to you get kind of you you realize oh wow man that thing is a living breathing creature that is reacting to me and reacting to its environment I got to lock this door I forgot to lock this door keep talking yeah and it's it's it's uh it's an interesting thing you if you talk to Farmers who are around animals they're they they're very very tuned and keyed into U animals and nature on a way that most of us are not they just have to be they're very aware of the Cycles they're very aware of all the things you talk to Dairy Farmers there was a mad cow scare and this this woman was being interviewed because they had to kill all our cows in front of her and then they had to burn the cows that was that was the government policy in in Britain at the time because you know these prons were very dangerous so they took they took out the whole herd and she was so devastated because she got to she know she knew her cows she had she every one of her cows she knew had its own personality had its own name and she had her own relationship with for me I went it's a [ __ ] cow really and it was devastating for her well she was going to butcher those cows or were they dairy cows no one of them had mad cow disease and they they in the law at the time this is about 10 years ago they had to put down the whole herd right so but was she raising these cows for butchering no
U Dairy they were dairy cows and and they were also they I I believe some of them were for butchering as well but this was a dairy farm for the most part so did they feed the the cows [ __ ] up things did they feed them like cow meat what the Apparently what happened with with the development of these prons in the central nervous systems of cows I'm not a scientist but from what I read I remember you could eat uh if you had a cow that had mad cow disease it wasn't eating the muscle meat that [ __ ] you up it was when you ate the brain tissue yeah the brain tissue spinal cord and they would ground that up into hot dogs and things like that and you can take those prons they're called prons I think and you can heat them up to 500° and they still don't die yeah uh and you can still get the mad cow disease so you can't it's not the St you can't St I it's more than a thousand degrees and and so um apparently that came from the fact that you had cows can azing their own tissue because when you Slaughter cows there are certain parts I guess that you don't necessarily need you take 5% of that you put it into the slop and they EAD it they were doing that with chicken [ __ ] up it's become illegal now but what's [ __ ] up about it is if they could do it with pigs that's okay pigs actually are omnivores but you're doing it with cows like you're just jacking his whole system but not just that the reason you don't want an animal cannibalizing itself is because it it it leads to these really weird pathogens yeah these it's why actually in the Book of Leviticus which prons or prons I think it's called prons but the The Book of Leviticus you were talking about on your show yeah the Book of Leviticus is actually um a book in the Old Testament that goes into really Stark detail about what you can eat and what you can't and in in the Old Testament they always talk about the fact you can't eat animals of prey uh you can't eat uh so you can't eat a leopard or an ospre an eagle a hawk why because those animals eat other animal protein and you you you still don't find people eating leopard meat even in I think they eat Mountain lines I think Mountain lines actually Bear and stuff like that but you wouldn't do it there's a reason we don't it's it's a rarity and we say I think they do because for the
most part no culture has ever eaten the protein except for fish but a lot of animals that eat other animals apparently it's not apparently it's not healthy it kind of makes sense if you think about it yeah well it's also they're prob they probably taste creepy yeah well I've heard I've heard that when you eat be meat it's really oily and really like G and oily but bears bears are mostly herbivores actually unless you're talking about polar bears which are complete meat eaters yeah we were actually just talking about this about going hunting we were saying that I didn't want I Steve Rella asked me to go hunting with them to go bear hunting and I was like I don't want to kill a bear man I don't want to eat it I don't want if it's not something that I really want to eat like I like venison I'll kill a deer I love venison I like Duck my mouth when I see it my dad and I went to to uh Alaska okay to go hunt bear he goes I want to hunt bear I go I'm not hunting bear he goes why not I go well because I don't want to kill a bear ow and by the way either do you somebody talk to you into it he goes well talking to a guy I go well what do you do he had already bought a rifle that's how susceptible he's like the guy was like come bu I'll buy a rifle he bought like literally like a like a $112,000 rifle something crazy with the scope and everything so we go there and I go I'll go to Alaska with you but we'll go fishing he goes I'll call you right back calls me yeah you're right I don't want to kill a bear either let's go fishing so he buys a crazy amount of fishing equipment we go there we didn't catch one fish not one [ __ ] fish really what we're not fishermen we lost all the lures we literally lost all the you know how to tie knots I don't know how to do any of it my dad you just took chances like that we went out there we paid all this money for this guy the guy learn some good knots man that's important the guy comes back and he goes we go we don't have any more lures and he goes but you had a thing of them he goes yeah we we lost him he goes what do you mean we were casting over the L into the trees he he he literally goes like this he goes how'd you lose all the ls I know we never caught one fish and then he he goes I want to sight my rifle this is he
brings his rifle I want to sight it so the former Marine wants to sight his rifle so he lies down he's showing us how to shoot prone right problem is when you shoot when you're in the Marines you're shooting military weapons they don't have the kind of recoil that a 370 or whatever the [ __ ] it was that can kill an elk from half a mile away so he's like he's got his face right up against the scope and he's like all right here and I'm like right behind him right and I'm like all right I'm going to shoot that log I go do it so I'm right behind him and I don't know if you've ever heard a [ __ ] elephant gun go off when you're close to it it was so loud that I pra I think I shat my pants a little bit like a little Duty flat my ass my face the sound like hit it was like a fire stick I was like he so he goes to shoot and he goes he shoots I'm right behind him and it was so loud I went Jesus like that it it hit me I fall back on my ass he looks up he's got this really deep round cut in his eye cuz the scope came back and hit him in the eye so for the rest of the [ __ ] Alaska we're walking around like a couple losers I'm like I'm like don't stand next to me bro you look like such a [ __ ] tourist he has this huge cut around his eye like half a raccoon that is hilarious like I don't know who that guy is I know he looks like me but he ain't my dad I'm like how are you supposed to shoot that through the scope are you supposed to back way up yeah you [ __ ] I don't know it's a 370 or whatever or do you just have to brace it you got to brace it better I shot it six times and I couldn't shoot it anymore cuz I literally don't have the meat in my shoulder it hurt that bad Jesus like the kick is that bad and one of the tricks you do when you don't have earplug is keep your mouth open when you shoot a gun that loud because it'll because the sound has somewhere to go oh my God mistake rookies make is they keep their mouth closed really yeah so you keep your mouth open and loose it's one of the rare times in life where you're supposed to keep your mouth open that's why I was told by the way any soldiers out there I don't know maybe I don't know what the [ __ ] I'm talking about but that's what the guy told me this guy named swed and he said keep your mouth open that's how you do it cuz he was
shooting no problem I was like doesn't that hurt it The Sound was so loud it hurt my face forget my ears it's crazy that they get to like a level like that it's like they they they get guns to the point when you get to like the 50 caliber range like what are you doing what are you doing what the hell are you doing what I want to kill something from a mile away F this isn't like I mean that's like some Army [ __ ] like why would why is a regular person buying some Army [ __ ] that's when you get a when you get one of those High powerered hunting rifles it's to kill an elk like half a mile away you know with this uh raging gun control debate in this country do you think that there's any there's any possible way you could make this a safe World here's guns here's what I always say about gun control it's what I talk about with my standup speaking of which I'll be at the American Comedy Club this weekend ladies and gentlemen Thursday Friday Saturday that's down in San Diego San Diego Thursday Friday and Saturday Saturday [ __ ] [ __ ] amazing club by the way it we did a death squad show there we had a [ __ ] great time man we did a weekend we did two shows I'm doing all new stuff I'm excited about my my new hour but but one of the things I always say my stand one thing I was talking about with gun control is gun control in this country in my opinion will never work in in in terms of what people are calling for because I think that men like their guns not because they're shiny and they go boom I actually really believe most men own guns because it's the it's it's for them certainly for me of a feeling that at least I can protect my family if the [ __ ] hits the fan because a golf club or a sharp stick ain't going to do it I want an Arsenal in case and I think most men go when a politician says and they have good points but if a politician says we want to take your gun away Americans in particular go I don't [ __ ] I don't not because you're not going to be there when somebody tries to break in my house at 4 in the morning I could call 911 but the feeling of a phone in my hand versus my mosberg 20 gauge you know pump action shotgun feels a lot better to me the real problem is that guns are out there that's the real problem if guns didn't exist then you having your gun would be a different
issue but here's where the debate actually lies for me after this terrible tragedy with the Batman thing I I do think and the NR ra is uh from what I can understand isn't that Cooperative with this I do think there's a debate to be had about The lethality of weapons do you need a drum that holds 100 rounds I don't think so do you need a [ __ ] elephant C right I I I don't think that you necessarily need an assault weapon that goes through a cent or goes through buildings but you know what all the law abiding people out there like my friend Anthony kumia from the opian Anthony show who a gun nut why shouldn't he be allowed to have them it doesn't bother me at all that he has I own guns and I I I I'm you know I agree I mean I wonder then the other Anthony has a 50 caliber Jesus he has one of those Cannon things I don't know I mean I I think that there was a politician on he said this about it and it was really kind of he was honest it was really interesting he said what can we do about these Mad Men and he said unfortunately in a Society like ours that's free and as big as we are you can't ultimately do anything about a lone crazy demented human being who is whatever he is schizophrenic I I think though the debate lies can you though create a situation where you can keep very lethal um uh efficient weapons like machine guns out of their hands that seems to be the debate I mean I don't think you're ever going to stop crazies from getting guns and shooting people but I it'd be nice if they got just a Glock as opposed to a an ar14 15 with a drum of 100 rounds now this is where the conspiracy theory kicks in is where all these people believe that the government has brainwashed people like this Joker guy to go and commit these things so they can clamp down on gun control and that when you see what is this Eric Holder you see like first of all the the nonsense of them selling illegal guns to Mexico and having those guns be used on Amic border patrol agents in murder of they're [ __ ] that was actually that was actually a way to track weapons you know a track whatever they sold guns man I think that is the dumbest idea in the history of dumb ideas I don't know the details but it doesn't sound very good well Alex Jones of course put your temp foil hat on believes that they did that [ __ ] on purpose and they're making money
off of it and they they wrapped it up in in a ridiculous completely implausible plot like a completely implausible plan yeah the problem with a guy like Al Jones in my opinion is whenever you talk about the government the government is so Diversified with so many different interests there are so many people that actually are against gun control and government and passionate about it there are a lot of people in government that are very for gun control I think there's a lot of debate even within the US Army and AR and and the FBI and the CIA about what we should do with our with about everything I mean I think you're misunderstanding his tone though what he's saying is it's a much more Sinister thing than the government itself what he's talking about is like the world Banks and the New World Order getting together and physically engineering a situation where they can clamp down on people to take away their guns because they're worried about the economy going into the toilet and then you know they're when when they're passing things like to a group it is it is however when they're passing things like the the ndaa when they pass things like that you realize like well they are slowly but steadily taking our rights away in a place in a time where the you know it's really not necessary there there's no personal attacks I mean there's no there's no attacks going on here in I I would agree with I would agree with you on that and but I I think it's a little bit more Insidious and a little bit more um subtle than that I I actually think that that it's kind of what the founding fathers warned about a long time ago a lot of times human beings will invent laws that take their own power away in the name of things like safety in the name of look at the Patriot Act Right you know those kinds of things where before you know it there is um there is a I keep telling you about this my my father I I did a podcast with my dad on the Brian C show and he he was talking about how he spent a lot of time in government a lot of time down there and watched how it really works it's not that politicians are bad it's not that you know Republicans are Democrats a lot of people have good ideas they're trying to get [ __ ] done Obama is non a socialist it's it's government's in the
business of intent you're in the business of intent you have an you have a law and you have an intention the problem when you have an intention is that there are so many different interests that you have to appease to get that law whole and past and what happens is what you intended usually has other consequences which would make sense and I think what what we have to worry about is like what you're talking about where we start losing our own power but it's almost like it happens it happens without us even realizing it like you pass a law that seems to be a good law it has other unintended consequences and whenever you do anything that compromises people's freedom and liberty right then you have to say well what what is the end game in this because this seems like even in the name of safety you're going to clamp down on freedom and liberty and safety isn't going to be worth nearly as much you have to really look at that my my my father was talking about corporations and he at one point ran the biggest Investment Bank in the world he knows little I heard it was an amazing podcast by the way a lot of people really really enjoyed it I was so proud of it it's it's you can get it on on U on brian.com or if I wasn't so selfish I would listen to it yeah well no this I think you'd really like though because listen he's so fair he's so fair he's so he's so about he's just about personal Liberty but he also understands that he's very moderate about that stuff but um you know he's he's somebody who who who talks about for example whatever your intention whatever your intention as Government grows and and both sides are responsible Democrats Republicans it's it's human as a government grows with tax revenue or whatever it is what happens with corporations they behave just like you and I would which is why I got to Lobby my government so I can a favorable outcome here because everybody else is doing it so pretty soon you got everybody feeding out of or influencing the government trough it's just how you can't do business otherwise you can't be in business as a bank without having very strong ties to the government you can't you just can't and there in lies the argument so no matter what you say yes you need government yes there are
good ideas out there you know but just be aware that regard regardless the bigger it gets even if its intentions are good you're going to have you're going to lose the argument goes you're going to lose some of your Liberties you're just going to that seems at least to be what history says and it seems to be that it's so easy to let something grow completely unnecessarily out of control if you wanted to you could micromanage every single aspect of society in order to create new jobs if you wanted to create new jobs and give more people the work of you know well look look look we were just talking about this this weekend now explain to me how in any way making hemp weed marijuana illegal marijuana is illegal you and I were we were hanging out at a bar this weekend and I remember I said and there was somebody acting up and they were drunk and I said that I've never been bothered by a pothead like that but but it's always somebody who's drinking now alcohol causes way more damage we all know the story yeah the facts why why is why is marijuana why are those laws those federal laws so difficult to repeal well I'll tell you why in my opinion and it goes back to what you brought up there's a lot of money in enforcing a lot of money in enforcing enforcing marijuana laws there's a lot lot of money yes talk to talk to the DEA you you've got a lot of people whose jobs depend on this stuff it's not anybody's fault it's what happens man we are all anytime you have a critique of somebody just realize if you were in their position you'd probably be the same goddamn way you hopefully not but that's what happens that's why we need clear-cut laws to protect people from their own instincts to protect human nature for you a person who's outside of it objectively looking at the situation from you know a a knowledgeable point of view you can sort of engineer what is and what isn't legal we have to avoid this so you can't take money we have to avoid that so you can't do this you know and unless you stick by some wellth thought rules it's almost like you know you need a scaffolding for Humanity to grow on and when you give people power with no scaffolding I yeah I I never I never argue anymore about a Democratic or republican platform I
never do that my my argument always centers on one thing which is hey look you got your political point of view that's great you got your criticisms we all agree we need some government you just need some government yeah we need some moral boundaries we need some engineering of our culture sure you need Law and Order you need roads you need but we need way less than we have well there you go and so then the question becomes how much less do we need a lot less okay and and that's where the debate should that's where we should talk about why and why what is the objective to preserve personal freedom personal Liberty if they had less laws and more cops the world would be a way better place and if the cops were paid better and treated better by people if more people got their [ __ ] together so they didn't look at the cop as like someone is going to come and arrest you for doing shitty things just don't be doing shitty things if we if we could figure out a way to elevate our society to the next level you know I think be a way they done some you know I was just reading an article about but my thoughts of a cop is like like a security person like a friend like like let's put it this way instead of thinking of cops as like someone is coming to bust you or someone's going to take your [ __ ] if if you had good cops in a community it's like if you had a [ __ ] fort and your buddy was the guy who had to watch the door with the gun because there's there's you know crazy Indians or who knows what the [ __ ] could happen you need that like that [ __ ] is very important you have to have somebody guarding the wall yeah and it did somewhere along the line it stopped being that and it became an Us Versus Them the the society versus the cops I I do think though that that um a lot of police forces that's not lost on a lot of cops and a lot of a lot of the brass for example in in New York I was read article that crime is down since the 90s by 80% lot it had to do and mostly mostly in Black and Hispanic neighborhoods mostly Giuliani came in and just cut the [ __ ] yeah it was Braden and their notion of equality of Life laws if you they said if somebody graffiti a WP they probably do other things that are bad too so we're going to start enforcing
those small those small crimes because they lead to bigger crimes that kind of notion and it's interesting how many people were like so down on Giuliani doing that and really upset that he's ruining New York New York's the best I I was in New York I shot a movie there three weeks ago whatever it's better than i' I I mean I've been my family's from there it's better than I've ever seen the city in my life it's incredible it's it's a better place to be than anywhere i' it's the best I've ever seen it it's a better place to be than anywhere in the world well in some ways I don't want to get carried away what's the greatest part about it to you accessibility to everything that's everything and feeling safe doing it um you've got first of all you've got the lowy side which is totally different than the lower west side which is totally different than the upper west side which is totally different than Midtown which is totally different than the Upper East Side and there's an experience to be had in all quadrant of Manhattan you can get there in 15 minutes by cab or less and or by Subway and most importantly you no longer walk around New York feeling like you're going to get mugged or anything else see that's what people that's the feeling that people still have about Manhattan is that that weird feeling of worrying about being mugged sure because it's so big but if you look at the statistics the the police have done an amazing job of policing and you know else has done a really good job is I can't remember the our police chief here and U LA but they've done a really good job really good job at controlling gang violence in this in this and it's almost impossible in such an huge area but they've done a really Innovative job you know comparatively they've they've they've they they've learned they learned a lot from from the gang explosions in the 80s and the 90s and they've done a really good job in a lot of places it's kind of [ __ ] when you really wrap your head around it like that should be the laws that people are concentrating on what is what is causing that kind of [ __ ] I know what's causing I have an opinion on that gangs I think a lot of it comes starts with it's like family exactly I talked to a principal in Kansas City I said what you what would you do about
education I wanted to get into a talk about it you know and he said nothing our schools are great our parents are [ __ ] up if they had good parents it'd be fine I was like oh geez I never thought he goes my school's great I just got parents that don't they're not they're not present they got three kids they can't take care of and it it comes down to that there's a lot of that man there's a l I think I think gangs are about kids who just want to feel significant and belong to something yeah absolutely everybody has the need to belong to a team or a tribe you know I mean that's why we call ourselves a death squad you know that's why I love being a part of 10th Planet Jiu-Jitsu you know that's it's we we you know when you you you become a part of like a team you know you become you feel stronger so some kid who's out there on his own you know his family just [ __ ] sucks and his whole life has been [ __ ] and you know he's there with some dude who will shoot a dude for him you know that's kind of what the podcast is too isn't it I mean you know you you you have a a really that show we were Joe did a show um this this weekend in Denver and that crowd was so they were so unbelievable it was like a rockar I went out as Joe and I and I was like what's up you [ __ ] Franks yeah we wanted to see how long it would take before people realize they thought it was me and they must have been like what the hell Joe got skinny and a little taller with a beard that's weird but anyway but they went crazy and I I I and then watch all those people line up just to take a picture with you they they feel like they belong to an experience you know they feel like they belong to something like even the the the my I do that you know my 10-minute podcast I noticed a lot of young men they they they they they glom to that kind of humor you know they they like the silliness that we do because it's kind of like recess it creates a you when you create a following and you create a core group of people it makes them feel like they belong to something I think that's why they root for a team you you know you have an experience with it it's the same kind of thing well this is a even more intimate experience because you know you're in people's [ __ ] heads man you know that's why people get so annoyed if you say
something over repeat things or if you do something they don't like like the you're people are allowing you like the most intimate uh sort of like input into their brain you're in the [ __ ] earbuds and you're literally playing inside their ear and you're you're talking inside their head and if you're annoying that's a mind [ __ ] but if you are really genuinely on a good path path and you really are genuinely promoting other people to be on a good path too and and just Brotherhood you know Tom rad sent me a text today that was a really [ __ ] awesome text cuz Tom just did the uh Ice House Chronicles show that we do at uh the Death Squad at the um ice house yeah the ice house is amazing old comedy club and we've been doing these shows and we're going to do one this Friday night where we have all these Comics go up it was D marera you know this week it's Greg Fitz Simmons Joey Diaz say Joy's on all the time bur Cher was there this week I mean these these shows are [ __ ] incredible okay and we're hanging around in the back room and we're doing a podcast and it's me and Cher and Tom rhods and d marera and Brody Stevens and we are laughing our [ __ ] dicks off it's so fun it's like the stuff we always did but now now thousand hundreds of thousands of people are listening but it's it but was but what what Tom said he he goes I really love the feeling of Comedy Brotherhood you know and that's what it that's really what it was it's like we have like a comedy Brotherhood and we really genuinely like each other love each other and want each other to succeed and are happy when each other succeeds that's the one thing that's missing in our group is that weird comic Neurosis that often exists where people can't be happy with other people's success just bitter bitter like narcissistic or bitter kind of like damaged like Islands that's what You' get a lot with like standup Comics well it's they haven't been told man it's it's like it's like learning Jiu-Jitsu wrong or learning to play the guitar wrong you haven't been told the way to manage your mind and what you what you don't realize is that even though you are separate from other people you're really not and you get something from them positive or negative and that affects you and if you can generate positive feelings in other
people then you will get more positive feeling in your own life you know what's really weird I I'm reading this book called um the sociopath next door written by this Harvard psychiatrist she sociopath I read an excerpt about that where they were saying some frightening numbers soci we were just you were just talking about connection and and how important it is and and the feeling you get from when you move other people and then you and you get in and you get moved from other people and most of us who are normal we get this sociopaths they don't even get that from their own children they don't even get like like they they could be very successful but they don't get any satisfaction out of being you know getting the agulation the only thing that they usually get pleasure from is winning and controlling other people's reactions isn't that wild so the idea is you whatever they can do power over people is what gets them off and winning that's the only thing that gives them the satisfaction because they can dominate I think we know Comics like that there are a lot of people like that I think we know one at least um and the ones and it's usually the ones that are in trouble for being unoriginal it's it's the desire for Conquest supersedes everything and they really don't have any problem [ __ ] people over and that's where it gets really weird every time I've ever [ __ ] anybody over in my life it it is left a bad feeling like we were talking before the show about uh stealing material and uh I said uh when I was an open micer I totally stole I stole Greg fit Simmons and stuff like we stole it on purp like we we spoke about it to each other we said like dude if I'm on the road and I'm bombing doing your [ __ ] like we made agreements with each other but even though I told those people his joke and it wasn't my joke I still felt like I was full of [ __ ] and it like [ __ ] with me for years do you know what I do every every time now I do stand up my buddy Sam Brown who was a great comic da of pancreatic cancer about two months ago and uh I was really close to him I knew him for 20 years and he was the first headliner i' ever seen who would crush he was from Boston and now every show I steal one of his his jokes I just I just I it's like my little to him I just put it in there I just kind of slide it in just as my
little like cuz I know I I wrote on his deathbed he unfortunately he couldn't talk but his wife read it to him I wrote um I said listen man um you know you're one of the greatest Comics you always made me laugh if there's any way I can have your material I mean you don't need it anymore I [ __ ] wrote that and she read it to him but I don't think he I don't think he was able I don't think he was conscious I hope he could hear it and I hope I made him laugh before he died I literally by the way I I I recorded two podcasts with him when he knew he was dying on my on my uh on my podcast so it's pretty pretty cool pretty pretty uh pretty moving you can do my [ __ ] if I die I'll do your [ __ ] I I'll always that's what I want to do for my friends I'll send you some of my notes he had great he had great bits man he was he had [ __ ] great bits he he would talk about small as dick I'll be behind the gve going dude no no you [ __ ] the order up oh God I'll screw your jokes up man your jokes would be hard to steal though because like I was watching you this weekend and one of the things I loved was it was almost like you were you were you were cuz I know a lot of the stuff is knew and so so much of it was just you kind of having an experience it's like what I like about your standup is you're always kind of having an experience and you're doing it for you and you're working something out and you're looking at how weirdly how weird we are structured as a society our minds are why we do things that make no sense why contextually something makes sense but then it doesn't in this case and it was so fun to watch because I was like you know this the comedy is almost secondary to the experience yeah yeah it's funny yes but you're almost like I think I really think people are watching you kind of have your own very authentic and unique experience verbal experience that's what I felt like like I Come Away with a very different perspective it's very inspiring to me because I start writing differently really yeah when I see you I go I I I it's a really nice it's what I love about like having friends that inspire me which you've always done like it's just like you have that's that's who your friend should be you know I know you I have friends that are wonderful that are I play grab ass with but then you have friends that are
like that really inspire you to be better and push you just by their example well they make you better they make you you make me better good I like hearing that unquestionably we all make each other better you know but you always you have your bar has always been oh I don't know how to describe where you place the bar but I always would watch you and I've seen you at your best I've seen you when your [ __ ] is [ __ ] so tight and you're just a machine gun like I remember when you were younger I'd never seen you did something to a crowd in New York I remember was I was with Patty Jenkins you were a [ __ ] machine gun it was like literally these New Yorkers like all these Comics got up and then Joe Rogan gets up and it was literally like we were like looking at each other going what the [ __ ] is what the [ __ ] is this and it was what it was was somebody who had never taken a day off and had only been working on being as authentic with their their experience and what a lot of people don't know about your early stuff is you were so good at Impressions you did all of it it was funny but really truth so for me it was just literally like a [ __ ] [ __ ] tsunami we were like Jesus Christ that's how you do standup that's how you do it good luck anybody trying to follow that [ __ ] ball of [ __ ] energy cuz you just come on like there was certain bits that I couldn't I couldn't follow myself oh my God I had to do them last you were so physical like you're muscular but really flexible like you do weird [ __ ] like fall into the splits I remember one time we had a meeting remember that we were pitching a TV show and we're sitting on a couch and it's like I think it was with Eric tanon bomb and like big producers and you go and and we were talking about martial arts and you go yeah I'm flexible and I was like yeah I'm flexible too and you go yeah but you can't do this and you grabbed your ankles and [ __ ] pulled them up you did the splits in the air and we were all like what the [ __ ] is that what is that he's like made of rubber and you used to bring that [ __ ] to the to the stage and it it just it's just really wild to watch you kind of continue to grow and change your expression you know well you you just keep adding information to the to the to the pile you keep adding your your learned
experiences so if you're still into it and uh you know you you don't diminish your focus and my focus is a real wrestling match because I I you know like uh in step pressfield's books he talks about distractions and and and different things that you I will I certainly battle with those things but I also battle with other things that I enjoy like you know what he calls distractions like that I think make me better I think the better I get at pool that seems really strange but the the better I am at comedy and right now I've never been better at comedy and I've never been better at pool like I've got this weird thing going on where um I can I can tune in to it's it's it's to me it seems to be about tuning into whatever the [ __ ] I'm trying to do whether it's jiujitsu whether it's p whatever but it's standup comedy but I have to have that same sort of intensity and energy and if I Windle if I drop below a certain level I can't rely on my learned experiences with standup I can't rely on the past I have to constantly be maintaining a certain amount of current interest writing new stuff that that's what I was going to say is well what's what I think the secret to your success is and I always try to tell people this because people get very frustrated and discouraged by the process of accomplishment because there are so many plateaus and you're always always like a lot of people well this didn't work out and I'm not good at it and and and what what we and I'll just say this to everybody because I I've been pretty successful and I have people come up to me and they you know when you do a show they want to take pictures and they they they look at you as a success in this business and you being one of my closest friends you had a critique of my my recent special on Showtime which I wasn't very happy with but what was great about it is you said hey Brian you could be a great you could be way better than you are now I shot a [ __ ] Showtime special a lot of people like whoa you shot a special I'm I'm not working on my second but you said you're you're put putting a little too much English on the ball okay a little too a little too slick playing around and what that does what and of course I know that a trick of course of course I know I've done it it's a I look back at my old
stuff where I did that it's the grossest feeling of all time but that's okay because what what it what it means is that no matter where you are in your career you've always got to be assessing you've always got to be taking yourself to to task and kind of taking a look at yourself objectively yeah and and going I got to I got to I got to work a little harder I'm watching my last special that I edited it's the best [ __ ] I've ever done and I can't even watch it I was like oh I look so stupid [ __ ] talk too much even when I Stumble through like uh like one I'll I'll [ __ ] up the the the the one word you know one one I'll have one little stumble in there and it's just like watching a puppy get hit with a hammer the first time the first time I saw myself on camera was when I was a wrestler and I was 14 and I I walked out on the mat when I and I used to think I was the baddest guy on the planet I I looked at this video and I went well where's Who's the who the [ __ ] is the kid with rickets [ __ ] is that it was me I've never been more devastated I was like I'm that skinny in a singlet I'm never wrestling again I'll go out in the burka before I [ __ ] go out in a singlet that's that's a that's a front that's a hor my my buddy wrote a book um which I told you you should have them on your podcast his name is Hunter MTZ he wrote a book called The Straight a conspiracy he speaks 10 languages fluently this kid graduated from Harbor with a biochemistry degree okay and I said why'd you write the book he said well I said oh I said to how do you learn 10 languages fluently and and he's fluent and he said oh it's because I it's because I I know I can do it and everybody who learns languages or math thinks they can't because they have an emotional context around it that's all and I well what does that mean he said I'm writing a book about it I'll tell you about it later I had him on my podcast he wrote a book called The Straight a conspiracy and he and and if you look at all the math all the science around learning and which he did one of the things that they find for sure is that people have these myths about themselves I'm not a math person I am a math person I'm artistic I'm not artistic I'm musical I'm not musical if you actually look at the science that's being done about learning and why some
people are very good at some things and others are not I'm talking broad scope here um what you find is that the emotional context with which they learn something is has everything to do with whether or not they're going to excel at that everything so in other words whatever emotional state you approach learning something growing at something means everything it's it's what it's all about if you are in a pleasant environment where somebody makes it fun for you okay you're going to learn it why are a lot of Asian people so The Stereotype goes like Chinese people good at math and a lot of Americans aren't I'll tell you why if you if you read Malcolm gladwell's book The outliers or my buddy's book straight a conspiracy it has to do with a culture that says well yeah this math problem is really hard and I guess I'll I'll be here for the next two and a half hours American are like I'm not going to sit here for two and a half hours I got [ __ ] to do that this is [ __ ] really hard guess what not a math person and we then your parents go yeah he's not good at math isn't it fascinating though that the the culture that is the least inclined to do that hard work is the culture that has the best art well we also have the best math and science surprisingly because we we have a we have immigrants competition too and the competition's Fierce and the the possibilities are pretty intense I also happen to believe that that that is the reason we're so good at Art and things is because it is we place emphasis on the individual it's your individual expression is what you can benefit from and we have freedom to do it you can't be expressive right you imagine having your podcast in Russia I can't even imagine having my podcast in America in a few years that's what's really a problem what's really a problem is the more you get [ __ ] like this National Defense authorization act the more these different laws are passed that slowly but surely take away your right to say certain things they just outlawed protest at military funerals the government has uh recently reinstated propaganda they're allowed now they haven't been since the 1940s to actively use propaganda on the American people that's legal now and all this [ __ ] is going on while the internet is
growing while people's access to information is just flying at them it's like this desperate last clawing attempt at A Dying culture to hold on to and it's disgusting it's disgusting that anybody would ever allow the government to use propaganda meaning mislead lie and and and distort the truth for the public in order to to emphasize their point that you would give that power to the government is so beyond sick but as long as you realize that that is always going to be the case and that you have to always be aware of that right the problem is it's happening though the problem is that it's a trend it's happening and it takes a lot to stop a trend it takes a lot to back it up you know why how how do you stop it you write to your representative I mean what happens after a while is I start to feel like I'm not represented right I start to feel like if I'm not a corporation with a lot of money to buy a but to buy lobbyists no you're not I don't have a way of influencing my government for example New York Times wrote an arttic ran an article recently about I travel a lot as do you and when you walk through the two boxes where you put your feet and you you put your hands up I'm not talking about the phone that go I'm talking the two the two boes you through well that's radiation and a New York Times wrote an article and it was about a week ago if you guys want to look it up about the fact that they actually aren't too sure how much radiation you're getting they think it might be on10th of a chest x-ray some in some cases more importantly they don't maintain them as well they had some crazy number of maintenance requests many of which were not met you're you're putting your trust into the TSA they're probably good people doing the best they can and in some ways they do a great job but the fact that I didn't know know that I was being blasted with radiation no matter how small not doing it I don't do that I have them Pat me down and and did anybody ever get creepy with you when you asked for a pat down I was I was hoping they would but they didn't [ __ ] not I mean creepy sexually I mean no no they they don't ask gram Hancock uh who's uh a guy who I found on the podcast before he's from England uh he came to America and he didn't trust the radiation of the machine he said they
violently like almost assaulted him oh really no I yeah he said it was very rap likee they grabbed his [ __ ] like the whole deal no they were really polite to me actually they went all right no problem you know I think it's you know who you get you know you might get some guy who doesn't like English people you know dude has an accent he's like I'm not going to go through there I'm actually impressed with the TSA and how professional L them are I'm actually impressed with how Cur you're such a [ __ ] Fox News contrarian I would have known that you were going to say that if we brought up the what about TSA [ __ ] you know what actually statistically I like everybody cuz I like everybody I have no like res I by the way just for the record everybody violate all my rules in the show I don't believe as an actor I should be talking about anything including politics but I can't help it I'm like anyway as an actor how could you say as an actor as a comic as a com you're you're a comic if you're a comic you should be able you know that ridiculous idea that you should be able to talk about anything except religion or politics yeah well that that alone is just like a a cry or a call rather to a a midling state of mind well the bummer is that that every time to a non-communication you know I think if you're not politically committed to some extent then it's at your own Peril if everybody wants to be uh ignorant about what's going on in their world and politics then then good luck trying to change anything and more importantly good luck being able to see what what's happening most people don't have the [ __ ] time man that's part of the problem most people have lives they have jobs and children and all that other stuff that goes along with them you have you have time to develop a philosophy you don't have to worry about the minutia but you have my point my point is that what you were saying earlier is that they don't feel like they're being represented so they don't feel like their efforts put into it have any great reward you know they don't they feel like completely there's a lot of people I think a good percentage more than half that feel completely alienated from the system and that's a conservative estimate if you say that half the people in this country feel alienated from the
system that's a failing system no matter how you look at it and the problem is people don't feel rewarded for investing in a failing system when a guy like Obama gets the Nobel Peace Prize and then sends 30,000 more troops to Afghanistan and everybody's like Jesus Christ man like what what kind of system is this who who would have who would have said that that's okay who would wanted their sons to go who would wanted their brother to go right get the [ __ ] out of here that's nonsense that's craziness but yet it's happening so we don't feel represented we feel I bet you I wonder if Obama himself feels in a lot of ways like a like a listless play thing I wonder you know what I mean like somebody I bet you his biggest complaint is the fact that he doesn't have any power at all I bet you that he makes it well he knows that if he makes one decision he's going to appease 50% of the people and piss off the other 50% I mean it's got to be a strange job if you just stop and think about who you are before you become president if you take out all the nonsense the tinf foil hat stuff about the Illuminati running things and let's just pretend for a brief moment that maybe elections are real okay and maybe Obama is just a regular dude who became a senator who's a regular dude who ran for president who activated a a Wellspring of Hope in this people and then they put him into office and then once he gets in there then he has to deal with these International Banks he has to deal with things like halberton he has to deal with people like Dick Cheney Rumsfeld think about all the people that were in power before him think about all the people that he has to communicate with think about all the [ __ ] that went down in that office think about all the people that died all over the world because of the actions of the group of people he replaced and think about what that must feel like to step into those shoes and then all of a sudden you realize you are at the helm of a murder machine you are at the helm of a thing that is in every single part of the world not only that it's also a huge octopus that is not being run by one particular no it's ped by a bunch of different interests but they're profiting in massive massive amounts on war andon and all those companies that
have that make a lot of money off of what what they what Eisenhower called the industrial military industrial as a as a president do you feel like you know when you get in there you just slowly try to put on the brakes I mean how much control does a guy have cuz it doesn't seem like we deviated much from Bush to Obama at all and in fact they cracked down on secrecy issues and crack down on Prosecuting people for leaking information and and Obama was was very um very much about the Drone program Special Forces program he made a joke about using the drones if someone tried to D to uh date his daughter he made a joke in one of those you know they do one of those functions where he does one liners Obama got up there and he made a joke about if you were dating his daughters he has one word for you drones Jesus yeah well uh it's kind of funny but not if one you're the president that's not when thousands of civilians have been murdered by drones thousands of innocent civilians I I believe I don't know what the number is now but it was in the thousands someone sent me all the statistics on Twitter they killed a lot of guys but but again was what we were talking about with farm factory farming when you have people in Nevada and Florida who go to a room and they kill people who who are a thousand miles away via you know camera and with these drones think about that your my joke was the the war hero in 20 years is going to be the chubby guy with huge thumb muscles who smells like Doritos and weed right he's he's a gamer he's being hooked up on alpab brain there is a there is a psychological component when you're removing yourself from the actual you know when you're a Marine you're drawing a bead you're shooting a guy and you know you're you're running and you and you you you see the guy die and stuff when you're in a room in your country and you go home after after operating these drones and killing whatever it might be maybe it's one person maybe 25 whatever it is or you drop a thousand PB bomb on or shoot a Hellfire missile whatever comes out of those things that's kind of really that's that raises a lot of questions it raises a lot of questions when we're this removed from the actual experience of killing and what it's what we were talking about earlier it's all connected
the sociopath does not have that feeling of connection and only feels pleasure when they win and what is war but completely sociopathic behavior and what is friendship other than non sociopathic Behavior the connection that you get with people being the most important thing we were talking about when we were doing this podcast that we've created an environment we've created a there's it's not as simple as this is a show it's a bunch of people tuning into the show and getting like positive thing out of it and having conversations like this and these conversations take place in their head and they experience it they they learn from it they it gives them hope it gives them a mindset that they can they can accomplish something with it gives them a you know how many [ __ ] people I've had come up to me and go dude since I've listened to your podcast I've lost 70 pounds I started drinking kale shakes I they come to me every [ __ ] show it's incredible it's also it's also important when you have a debate and we we have a discussion like we do to to actually take a look at the where to place you where to place the the focus for example a lot of people say well well the military is do well the military there are a lot of people in the military who are carrying out these who are doing these things that never agreed with the war in the first place I mean we have a civilian government that controls the military that makes these decisions for the military the military just carries out orders that's how our government works the military has a job to do if you send them into a war zone they're going to get the job done um and a lot of guys I mean I I know I I you know I went to Afghanistan but I I know enough people in the armed forces a lot of a lot of men in the armed forces and women have an ideology that they believe in it's this country it's the things that they'll do and they come in they're their loyal servants they risk their [ __ ] lives and they go do their job and a lot of them get M they lose their arms they lose their friends and everything else I think that when you start to look at how this War's gone over the past 11 years and I'm talking about Afghanistan and Iraq you've got to be you've got to be very very conscientious about not only how this really started who were the who were the
architects who is the intellectual Force who was the argument behind it how did this happen how did this turn into a huge snowball and the reason you should know about that is because your lives and other people's lives depend on it in the future get ourselves we'll get ourselves into another situation you know my buddy it's not Weir though that's what's really going on I'm sorry it's not we're going to get ourselves into another situation somebody else is going to do it well my my buddy um my buddy I think I put it on on red band's uh thing but I'm death squad but my buddy who I interviewed who's a special forces guy who's a real a real I don't know what he does but I know he's very much involved and he was the baddest guy I ever knew growing up and he said he he was he just said about the war effort he watched what's happening he's been in Iraq for I guess seven years and he said Iraq is a country now we've created a mini Saddam and this guy Malaki he is now a he's a Shiite he is got police squads that report directly to him so what we we go into Iraq there's this notion that well he's got the fourth largest army in the world we got to stop him from you know dropping a weapon in Al qaeda's hands there's the arguments and stuff what we've done in some ways if you look at Iraq with the exception of Kurdistan and stuff is that we've really destroyed that country a lot of people are dead and we've put into place somebody who is keeping his people or has a potential of keeping his people in the same kind of Oppression technically as Saddam did now what is the objective what are we doing was this worth it was it worth killing all those people was it worth all those soldiers didn't come back and many more who were wounded that's the question and more importantly what lessons can be learned what do we have to learn from Iraq and and and Afghanistan what do we have to learn so we don't get our ourselves into the situation again sometimes war is inevitable man it is that wasn't an inevitable one that was one that we got tricked into okay we realiz how how do we not get tricked the next time well we have the internet now I think we we have a completely different sort of playing field than what existed back when uh Bush and Cheney dragged us into the Iraq War I think the internet has evolved far
past where it is that's why things like Wikileaks are so terrifying to the powers of be it's real hard to get away with [ __ ] with the internet though there's so much counterveiling information too like you get one argument then you get another but that's just debate I'm talking about straight information um I think that the the access to information is ultimately changing the world that we live in and it's happening so quickly and these kind of conversations really weren't common place when we were kids when we were 16 and 17 our parents weren't having these kind of conversations they just weren't it's a it's a different world we we know more about how things work and because of that it makes it harder and harder to accomplish [ __ ] still going still going on right now but ultimately it's got to die off in order for us to have you know uh any sort of relit society we're going to have to evolve past that and realize just as you and I realize as friends and as members of our community that it's not necessary and that that kind of uh energy that you put out to control people to you know and to to to profit from other people's losses is totally non-beneficial to you as well just because you're pulling it off under the guise of a corporation doesn't mean that you are immune to the negative rebound of that because you're not and you want to call it karma you want to call it what goes around comes around whatever you want to call it it's real okay I have experienced it I am walking proof of it my whole life is proof of it I I have been I've the the negative things that I've ever done in my life I have felt in great deep detail and rebounded as much as possible to turn that terrible feeling into positive energy and that is why I've been a happy person my whole life but but do you think that's because because I I always wonder I I try to help people a friend of mine who's going through a tough time now and I and I realize that one of the reasons that he's going through a hard time is he's not um in any way actually really confronted and asked himself what he wants want to be you can't get a guy to do that though but but don't you think that part part of your success is the fact that you've already you've always been able to see in Technicolor what you
wanted and what you wanted to be or or is that well you know what it is um uh first of all it's just pressing forward that's constant that that that constant need to write new [ __ ] to do different things to that constant need to be in motion the constant need to be doing something whether it's doing Jiu-Jitsu or playing pool or writing more jokes or getting on stage that forward momentum that is a constant that that that that is that is the reason why I've done everything that's like passion right yeah yeah it's and you can transfer it it's like the MTO Musashi quote once you understand the way broadly you can see it in all things it's like the idea that once you lock on to what it is to really focus get good at something then you can car but it's also that it's it's really satisfying to accomplish things it's really satisfying to write things it's really satisfying to do shows I've been taking I don't know even know why I did it but I've always wanted to play the drums so I'm I've I've been taking drums for a year now it's actually changed not only my comedy but my sports like like I pick up on [ __ ] really fast now uh because because with the drums I'm having to do something one thing with my foot one thing with this hand one thing with this and one this so my brain is firing it's firing so it's changed the way I read it's changed the way I do stand up it's really wild it's a really good mental and I'm listening differently I'm never going to be in a band by the way right but you're just enjoying it I'm just enjoying I love that I think that's very important to life and I think a lot of people like there's there's like a lot of people that have falsely rewarded being a lazy [ __ ] and like I'd rather just sit in front of the TV chill with my beers watch TV let me tell you something this is the real reality of of life if you don't earn something you won't appreciate it it's why people win the lottery and they lose all their money within a year when you earn something you appreciate it it is it is a golden steadfast rule of life and if you're laying around on the couch watching TV and you haven't done anything to deserve that Dr it doesn't feel good it doesn't feel good it doesn't you feel like a [ __ ] loser but when I do something like if I write and I blast out like
three or four hours are really good good [ __ ] and I'm like yes I feel good I feel fired up I can't wait to do a show I can go watch TV and I can enjoy it I can go watch mountain men and I enjoy watching these [ __ ] guys here's what I think is really like works for me is I go I sit down and I go like this I go what do I want to what what do I want to do and what am I going to regret not doing when I when I'm 90 you know I say to myself I go what do I really want to do and I go and what do I want to do in three months or six months and stuff like that and then I literally I structure my day and I think you can do this no matter who you are you your day so you go you wake up every morning you go what action just one action maybe two actions whatever what action can I take today just to get a little closer to that that goal I just want it just to get a little closer whatever whatever whatever it is you know maybe it's 20 minutes of practicing your takedowns or whatever it might be I want to get my black belt and Jiu-Jitsu I want to be able to play drums in a band I want you know whatever it might be I want to be able to speak a language you know um [ __ ] calling me during my podcast godamn it it's Brian Redban maybe he's calling to tell me that the show down hey boo you're live on the air his mic's out it's really quiet well he keeps backing up that's what it is yeah sorry guys oh really yeah you can't be talking back there all casual [ __ ] okay I gotta get in thanks Brian this is technical information delivered via telephone ladies and gentlemen Brian Redban on the scene follow him him redband on Twitter all right buddy me Brian K Brian Ken on Twitter I respond to all my twitters by the way where were we what were we talking about I wasn't saying any very important probably um but this this idea that we were talking about before of of community of you know of all influencing each other in a positive way that gets lost in big numbers and the problem is we could have a great tribe of like 50 people and keep it together and have the most awesome Utopia you know what as I've heard Boulder described Boulder a really small Mountain Community but it's so small it's like it really almost is like a
functional working Utopia but I think that we could do that it's possible to do that as a country we just have to get more people in tune to thinking correctly and most people are just never taught how to think they're never taught that they can manage their Consciousness they've never taught they've never been taught that there are patterns that a mind can go down that's self-destructive completely self-destructive and also totally unnecessary and you have to learn like all the times I've blown my cool for nothing and still do I mean I might be in my car [ __ ] and hit the horn and [ __ ] pass somebody just so pointless so stupid I freaked out today at the airport it's almost always a sign that I'm doing too much it's always a sign of some sort of external stress it's affecting you know whatever it is that but when when you can see that if you can see that and if you can go in the the right direction if we could [ __ ] influence a giant group of people to go in the right direction then you really can change something well starts with individuals but that starts that starts with individuals really asking themselves it starts with with inspiration it doesn't always start with individuals asking themselves what they want sometimes it starts with inspiration where you realize there's no there's no difference between them and me they were losers too I was I've been a loser I've been a [ __ ] failure in my life hardcore like people I I've had people say like did you ever bomb on stage I'm like Oh my Christ did I bomb I bombed so hard I bombed so hard where no one who ever watched me that day would have ever thought that I could ever be funny you I had a girl um send me a short film um her name is Diana and and she sent me a a film uh and and she wrote it was she wrote a basically a movie a short film about her experience with a guy on a date and the guy was me she never told me that but she sent it to me I and and all the lines the guy was making saying were lines I had said to her and let me tell you something man I I called her up and I went Diana I go I'm so sorry I was such a [ __ ] arrogant prick I was such a dick CU I didn't even understand you were a woman and I had a projected notion of what you were what you thought and I thought I
was so much smarter than you were and you were looking at me like I was a guinea pig in a [ __ ] maze like a like a rat in a maze like literally like look at this monkey talk to me like I'm an idiot trying to [ __ ] me yeah exactly and he's just hitting me with all these things and he's just a dick literally I I looked at I was just appalled I was appalled at who I was and it's just cuz I didn't know any better I just didn't I had preconceived notions of what women were preconceived notions of how they thought preconceived notions of what a man was supposed to be those experiences by the time you get to your 20s and you know you're you're having experiences with women these are not there first of all social experiences when you're involving people that are sexually attracted to each other are very complicated they're very awkward there's plenty of room for misunderstanding there's plenty of room for offending people putting out bad vibes being too forward being too you know there's it's it's a very strange sort of a situation anyway so we're not good at navigating it you know and we we you know when you're young especially you say the dumbest [ __ ] [ __ ] and most of the time you [ __ ] hate yourself after it's over you don't you know you didn't want to do that it's just it's like you being thrown in a Major League Baseball game and someone telling you to hit that ball like that [ __ ] thing's flying at me that's exactly you're really not prepared for that extreme experience there's no manual for life I mean well not only that I mean how much did your [ __ ] parent I don't know how much your parents taught you but how much did your parents teach you about dating oh nothing I was just talking about that with my son I was like I I didn't really I wasn't really taught the women the complexity of the female psyche I'm definitely going to have to have a talk with my son about that but yeah oh yeah that's that's going to be that I mean that's that's it's so important to to try to actually raise a kid that can understand what's what's next on the horizon give him like a little heads up of like what this is what I went through so this is probably that that would [ __ ] help a lot but when it comes to dating my [ __ ] parents didn't give me any dating advice also because you have
you you're also given a very weird archetypal notion of what masculinity is too like that's also like being what I didn't even know what a what a man defined was it was difficult I had an example what's to everybody it's different you know I mean what it man is a person who does this is what I believe a man is a person who does what he wants and what makes him happy as long as he's not hurting other people who actually follows through and does what he wants as opposed to someone who's someone's [ __ ] if you let me tell you something if you're a gay guy okay and you're not out there blowing guys because you're worried about what other people think you're somebody's [ __ ] whether you realize it or not you're the [ __ ] of all the Prejudice people that want to stop people from being gay and if you're a man you'll go out there and suck some [ __ ] that's that's reality that's true because that's what life is what I like you you probably don't but it's my right to like what I like and being a man is going after what you like and if you want to [ __ ] take the easy way out and take some some job that you know you can do instead of pursue a a career and writing books or pursue a career racing horses whatever the [ __ ] you're compell Ste pressfield and going pro had the best example he said you may have your degree in comparative literature you may have a PhD in comparative literature and teach comparative literature but guess what you should have written a novel so that's just a ofch procrastination you know so you're right I mean it's really a question of going for what you want and you know a real man can be a guy who fights in the cage or a guy who who Who's a nurse in a [ __ ] Hospital you know whatever it is that you're doing whatever you're supposed to do wherever you're supposed to place your energy giving helping and growing uh that's that's that's what we need to teach kids and that's there's no there's there's no better or worse if you're supposed to be a carpenter that's what if you really enjoy I have a buddy who's a carpenter back home and he's [ __ ] loves it he loves buildings he he loves the art of putting together a great room he loves it when it's done he loves that he can you look in this room and it's all mapped out you're following the architect's plans and you're laying down
things and next thing you know you three months later whatever it is look what the [ __ ] awesome kitchen you guys just built holy [ __ ] like he gets a deep feeling of satisfaction from that and he he makes a good living he's got a good company doing that but that's it's because that's what he's passionate about it's because he actually enjoys his work and it doesn't matter if it's that or if it's being in a [ __ ] band or if it's you know being a standup or whatever it is if you don't follow that [ __ ] that's when you you you're you're [ __ ] yourself man our our dear friend Sam Sheran said uh he goes I was talking about how I want I was watching UFC every time I watch the little part of me dies because I want to be a fighter no you don't no I know but that's what he said he goes Brian he goes Brian you are supposed to and I've always been supposed to be a standup comic dude you found what you're supposed to do you you were not supposed to be a fighter or anything else you remember what you weren't doing comedy yeah I remember you told me you go you're missing out on the best thing in the world what are you what are you doing I got back into it because of you but I also I I remember watching Dane Cook back in the day and I was like that dude is crushing a room and I want I got to get back into this I want do that you wanted a crush I just loved I loved it I was like watching him have so much fun why did you stop I I I don't know cuz I'm crazy well you weren't doing real standup when I first met you when I first met you I couldn't get spots and I was like [ __ ] it and I was trying to be an actor we first started hanging out you had this act that was like you had taken every alternative act that you saw and tried to duplicate it and I remember talking to you about it going that isn't even you man what are you doing like you're you're going up there and you're you're doing what these [ __ ] weirdo judgmental like dorks want you to do like you're doing what you think they're going to enjoy from that's what's so satisfying to me now especially about the stuff I'm doing now you're being yourself this weekend at the American Comedy clubgo San Diego amazing club by the way and it's filled with great comedy if you're if you're living in San Diego San Diego finally has like a real
comedy club and uh in Chicago August 23rd they have National Headliners there every weekend like The Comedy Store in La Hoy is a great Club but you could get [ __ ] there and they could send down one of those old school Headliners from like the 1970s that hasn't written a joke in 100 years and doesn't work anywhere else other than The Comedy Store they'll send those down to La Hoya on occasion I don't know if they're still doing that but back in the day you would look at the lineup and go oh my God no that's the headliner no you almost wanted to like call the people and go please just stay cuz that show would be so bad it would they would never want to go see standup comedy again no and it's true is as you get older and if you're trying to be a real trying to do something it it what happens I think what's supposed to happen as you become a comic is you start stripping away all that other stuff and more and more of who you really are yeah is kind of expressed that's what's so satisfying to me you know yeah for sure I don't you're learning how to talk on stage yeah instead of you were just like you were when I first met you you were doing rabbits out of hats and then you became just this like really silly guy it was like really silly but I was always weirded out by the fact you were so silly but then we would have these deep [ __ ] intense conversations and I was like why where's that on stage and then I thought about it I'm like well you know that's a choice like that's an artistic thing like look at Hedberg one of my favorite Comics ever and you know there's no message in that it was all silliness and there's nothing wrong with that like I'm I'm a silly goose there's a large part of me that's always I can't help but it's funny that you're so intense often it's like there's a real balance to that and it's a good quality that you have that is missing in a lot of men would they somehow or another equate weakness with silly you know yeah because I don't think I think the biggest mistake a man can make is taking himself seriously yes don't take yourself too seriously man there's always somebody faster stronger funnier better smarter just just do only what you can do and always don't be afraid to [ __ ] take the pressure off yourself
man don't be afraid to kind of just make fun of yourself there's nothing wrong with it there's a lot of power in that you yeah you don't understand that when you try to not take the hits that the the rebounds double triple the effect cuz you're not learning you're not only are you not taking the hit but you're not learning from the hit because every time you take the hit it makes you better you got to take the hit emotionally you got to take the hit psychologically you got to take the hit with your ego you got to [ __ ] fail in life it's an important ingredient to success the the other thing that I was don't you agree I 100% agree with that the 100% And and the other the other thing that that the the as you were talking I was thinking about the other thing you get from it which is when when you take when you allow yourself to be a little bit of a silly goose or you allow yourself to be vulnerable or whatever it is and make fun of yourself what'll happen is that people around you feel safer and what they'll do is they won't be on their guard because a lot of times we come at a situation if you come at a situation from a power angle or whatever that person's guard will go up immediately and you won't see who they really are well think about this how disappointing is it when you meet someone and you have like a level of agulation for them you you you know you're they're famous you're your fan and they're a dick the the rebound is stunning it's stunning and hurtful I mean it's it's incredible but on the other side when you approach someone and they're like really normal and nice what a warm feeling that is what like because you're coming at them in an unfair way it's like we had Berke Cher on the Ice House Chronicles and he was talking about his experience with Jean Simmons and apparently he did that show the X show and Jean Simmons was a [ __ ] complete [ __ ] to him and Jean Simmons like told him not to talk like said yeah told him he wouldn't be interviewing him he was going to make this girl interview him and he was a huge kiss fan before this so when this happened it was completely devastating to Bert and having Bert relay this and then having all of us share experience like I was talking about I met Robin Williams last week and but he was like real normal
like real nice guy like but it was still it was [ __ ] Robin Williams you know what I mean like he didn't have to be normal he didn't have to be a nice guy it could have been weird because when you meet someone like that there's a weird imbalance if you're talking to Tom Cruz I don't care how many gay jokes you have in the back of your head you won't those won't pop in your head when you meet them you'll be like holy [ __ ] I hope he likes me I SP I spent an hour and a I did a reading with him for three hours and I spent an hour and a half with him at a party and believe me I was like I was like maybe he'll be my best friend and by the way and by the way I'm a straight guy and I think he's straight actually but shut your [ __ ] mouth all I know is I'm looking at him going he's a really goodl looking guy I was like you know what Tom Cruz I me we're really we're talking we're having a good conversation if Tom Cruz wanted to like he was like hey I'll be your best friend you may out with me for 10 minutes I'd be like I got you out with Tom I'd have to think about it cuz then I could be best friends with him I think would I make out with Tom Cruz 1,000% as a straight man you know why cuz I'd be able to tell you about it are you [ __ ] kidding me are you kid what yeah for the record for the record open mouth I'd be like Tom come over here by kind of pretty he's kind of pretty so yes I would would you enforce your weight on him a little bit and press him backwards just to make him a little Bend to your will without question but I'd also be looking I you'd be the first phone call I'd make you'd be the first phone call I make I go dude I sit down for a second I got something uh I'm a straight man I I bub slapped and I mean bub slapped for 10 minutes with Tom Cruz and his hands were we can make that happen with John Travolta we just have to put you in the proximity can't do it you wouldn't do it with John he's too gay he's gay yeah I can't I'm not I'm not going to make it's like when my agent sent me a a thing to audition for que's folk you know which was that show on Showtime and and the first thing was I have to be making out with this guy I was like listen call My AG and I go look I'm not a homophobe I'm really not and I'm I'm actually in favor of gay
marriage and all that I go but I I'm you got to know who I am I'm Brian Ken and I'm straight guy and if you think I'm waking up every [ __ ] morning at 6:00 a.m. and going to set and making out with some dude after after getting rid of my coffee breath you're you're out of your [ __ ] mind and there's not enough money that I would do that with here's the problem this is one of the reasons why I wouldn't be into doing it it's not that I'm not open-minded but I don't like watching G guys kiss so I don't want to do a movie where guys kiss that's not my kind of movie I'm squeamish yeah you wanted me to do a movie where turn into a werewolf I never saw Brokeback Mountain actually I saw it it was awesome I had a great five minute bit about it it's [ __ ] hilarious I laugh through so much of that movie a child you know why because I enjoyed it and people there was a lot I had this conversation with someone who like you know like well you know it's because of your narrow-minded point of view that you didn't enjoy it I enjoyed the [ __ ] out of it I bet I enjoyed it more than you okay cuz I enjoyed it as even if yes it is a beautiful love story and it is sad and oddly romantic it's still also hilarious I enjoyed both aspects of it I'm not close-minded or homophobic but I enjoyed the love thing that they had going on but I also enjoyed giggling like a [ __ ] school child every time they were kissing each other you're a bit I remember you were like two men making out is in fact hilarious I'm sorry it's hilarious it's not there's nothing wrong with it being funny it's not like I'm telling you not to do it but if you're telling me there should be less funny in the world you can go [ __ ] yourself exactly and if you're telling me that what you want to do if I think it's funny hurts you I think you're a [ __ ] okay because if you start making fun of having sex with girls uh I'm not going to get I'm not feeling it's not going to get hurt like well you're a majority they're a minority get the [ __ ] over it if you like [ __ ] guys you should laugh your ass off when dudes talk about you [ __ ] guys cuz that's what you enjoy humor is the greatest [ __ ] equalizer speaking speaking of which you'll kill me but I have to go to the 10-minute podcast 10-minute podcast and go [ __ ] itself D I know but I got to
do it because they're waiting for me and I got to be there at 7:00 you're going be late you're going to be late I'm already going to be late and they're going to kill me yeah they'll be fine they're not they'll be fine we're on the internet man listen we we we have to keep the throwing for a little while got to go do the 10in podast we have so much to talk about you being in the American Comedy Company in San Diego this weekend yes I'll be at the American Comedy Club comedy company it's American Comedy Company San Diego that's what it's called right or is it the American Comedy Club you might be right it's American Comedy Club at San Diego thday Friday Saturday and I'll be the Chicago improv everybody Chicago improv August 23rd 24th now you're confusing the [ __ ] out of people dude don't don't ever say more than one just one right just one it's American Comedy Company oh it is yes American Comedy Company it's in Sand Diego California it is a [ __ ] awesome club it's one of those like really low ceiling intimate clubs that you know like the Comedy Works in Denver like the old comedy I love The Comedy Works Inver oh yeah it's it's as good as it gets me and uh Doug Benson and Brandon Walsh we were in town in in uh this and you there too at the Paramount and uh one of the things we're saying we were walking by the uh Comedy Works like there's no better Club there's never been a better Club invent than the Comedy Works in Denver it's perfect size it's the perfect height the chairs don't move nobody can like move their chair under your foot the chairs are locked in place there's a table in between each chair sit the [ __ ] down here's the Show everybody's packed in there the weight staff's awesome the shows are fantastic you walk by The Comedy Works you look and you see one headliner after another National name after National name and she's an individual she's not like the Improv she's not a part of a giant Corporation Wendy is the [ __ ] I love that lady if you're listening Wendy you're the [ __ ] you are the best we love you that club is [ __ ] tremendous and she's got another one the land I had such a good time I had such a good time there yeah well Denver is [ __ ] awesome period And The Paramount was awesome too and thanks to everybody you I've always wonder I've always wondered
this is going to sound so weird but I've always wondered like what like with with a building like that with all that laughter over all those years like I wonder and then and then you take something terrible like the torture chambers of uh like Abu gra or something that the Sadam kept all his people in and stuff I wonder what the composition of that the the walls are I wonder if there's anything that permeates I mean this Hocus Pocus [ __ ] but I've always wondered if if in some ways the material like of the of the the organic material like the wood would be a different kind of composition than in a torture chamber or something is all that all that positive energy versus all that negative energy you know you weird thing message in the water uh documentary turned be a FR that a FR it was all [ __ ] killed me it was all [ __ ] horeshit godamn it yeah I looked into it I was like oh you guys were lying to me in that [ __ ] movie [ __ ] Liars yeah [ __ ] you who made that movie I I know that there's uh there's places like the ice house is a perfect example that there's been so much laughter in that place that it feels good going in I don't know if that's my personal association though and it very likely could if you led me into that place from the outside blindfolded and I thought I was in a bakery and you know well no you know what you know what it's all Association because my friend how about this my friend's a surfer was a competitive Surfer right when when she hears waves for most of us waves are like relaxing her heart starts beating really fast she gets really nervous well yeah that totally makes sense waves waves she gets she gets scared and competitive and she she can't relax she's like she's in fight mode cuz she knows that she's about to attack a w well you know when I was a kid for years I couldn't go to fights cuz I didn't like the way I felt that's right I got real nervous I would like I would think that I was supposed to fight next and I would and it was just a weird part of me like I would try to enjoy it but there was like until I was like in my 30s until I had really resolved the fact that I was no longer going to compete you know I would get nervous every time i' go to a live event this is the first UFC I've ever been to where I was
totally relaxed really I would go to UFC's the reason I don't go to U I can always get tickets from you and by the way congrats to Donald Cerrone who can't I stand it once just excited that [ __ ] so awesome he's so awesome W what a fight was what a round that that was 70 seconds of craz one of my favorite things I was doing standup and I they came to the Comedy Works in Denver and I could see Donald cerrone's hat going up and down laughing at my jokes and after he goes dude my [ __ ] ABS you gave me a [ __ ] ab workout him and Nate Mari like an underwear model too yeah he's a stud girl girls the girls I was with like my friend's wife and my my girl they were like looking at they were looking at Donald they were literally like like my friend's wives they were like that guy I just want to touch him they inappropriate around him he's a handsome [ __ ] weird isn't that weird when guys wives get creeper on on dudes like right in front of them yeah when when you got an alpha male like [ __ ] it's not just that it's when you have such a disrespectful relationship that a lot of people engage in this like I Rel yeah well a lot of people have that weird I'll insult you you'll insult me and you know you go back and forth a little bit it's not you're not in each other's Corners you're not looking out for each other you got a bad relationship and you're just you haven't worked it out and you're you're not trying to you're just stuck in this little [ __ ] in and when they're around men man they'll grow up on you I've had women take pictures and squeeze my ass they were coming up to me going I want to talk to him say hi to him I want to meet him I'm like your husband's right there she's like look at his ass look at his ass they were like they all over him well those kicks that he throws that's develop that he stud that he is [ __ ] fight that was holy [ __ ] that was a crazy fight and it was right when I had just got done saying that he has to be very careful he can't get overconfident because Melvin can [ __ ] you up with one punch and he's so explosive oh my God that left hook Melvin landed too that could have and Donald kept it together cuz he got [ __ ] when when were you when were you okay after that that punch and he goes right now yeah yeah he was not okay and
he still threw the kick see that's how confident he is in his ground games one of about Cerrone I love that he'll [ __ ] let those kicks fly man cuz if you take him down man his chances are he's going to threaten you from the bottom he doesn't get ground and pounded and he threatens dudes with triangles and arm bars he's not just long he goes for it man he attacks he attacks on the ground so he he's not holding back so he's willing to throw even after getting tagged like that he still throws a head kick but 55 is such a I want to see him fight Jose Aldo crazy 55 yeah well Aldo is most likely going to move to 55 eventually he's still young he's only 25 and he's having a hard time making weight although he's had a less of a hard time of it lately because he cut back on the weightlifter weightlifting the weightlifting he was uh bulking up in between you know uh fights and putting on masks and then the cut was harder 55 is just a division of killers oh yeah well so is 45 man every and every weight class is growing you know like 35's growing now there's there's like there's this Eric Perez kid that fought this weekend there's like it's constant this uh there's so many [ __ ] good Fighters man it's the the the the whole like division like the whole UFC like every single division is expanding and getting deeper and deeper and deeper the heavyweight division is getting deeper and deeper and deeper they're gonna have Kan Velasquez versus junor Dos Santos on New Year's Eve did really didn't they F they fought already dude it's going to be on the 29th or the 30th yeah they're gonna have a rematch rematch yeah after Kane destroyed Bigfoot Kane just ran through Bigfoot Silva just cut blasted him on the ground the theant is such a good boxer he's scary oh he's scary I'm glad I'm not a fighter man that's just every time you step in that that octagon you're going to war every single time it's what we talked about earlier it's it has to be what you really want to do it has to be what you're really driven to do it has to be your calling and if it's not your calling you better get the [ __ ] out of there because there's a guy like Junior dos Santos in the other end of the ring and it is his calling when Anderson Silva steps in that cage he doesn't wish he was in a [ __ ] mirachi
band you know Mariachi whatever he's ready to [ __ ] you up that's what he's there for that's what he does he's not supposed to be doing anything else yeah I I just you know and the the margin for error now is so small with these guys they're so good some of these guys the level is insane the level speed difference between um when I was watching the speed difference between Cerrone and gard and the fights before was astronomical well they were both throwing hay makers you know and that is part of it is that they were throwing to kill they knew each other very well I can't believe went down that that was so such a vicious thing he was really B well Donald hit him absolutely perfectly he clanged him with the left shin to the head he likes that left high kick with the switch he throws that so well to the head man it's such a powerful shot a lot of guys don't throw it that hard so there's dudes that stand there and they and they'll take one of those on the gloves you know they'll kind of like recognize that it's coming but they'll still try to avoid it instead try to try to move like you can't do it to Anderson like you Tred like Rich Franklin tried the the highest switch kick on Anderson Anderson sees it coming knows what you're gonna do and just bends and slides off his shoulder and he looks right at Matrix he's the [ __ ] Matrix he's incredible but Caron's got so much power in it and he's so he's got so so much dexterity with his legs it just Co it just come it's almost like it's shocking how quick it gets there he seem so confident in this fight oh man and he was very confident and then the right hand he laughed landed afterwards was just a bomb it was just pinpoint it was like boom it was like flying at him all his power Direct ly on the jaw who fight Henderson next uh Nate does Nate Diaz does oh boy I love yeah that's going to be incredible I love Nate Diaz yeah well that was a tough fight man that a lot of people thought Frankie Edgar won that fight almost unanimously the um professionals on Twitter thought that he won that fight he the toughest guy at that at he's the toughest small guy in the world I mean Frank Yer is a [ __ ] dude I you know look I I I thought he won the fight afterwards by decision but it was it you know you I would have to honestly go back and watch
it again and and and actually score it with my mouth shut to make an accurate assessment of whether or not my feelings after the fight are over are accurate you know I I'm really careful about saying what I think when it's a real close fight like that until I actually sit down and watch it as if I was scoring it because if you're watching it as a commentator you're also involved in it you're trying to be entertaining you know I'm trying to like explain what's going on and I would have to like in order to do that and do like a really effective calculation of whether or not one person W or the other especially when it's close because it was the fight unquestionably was close there's no doubt about it it was a very close fight no doubt about it the people thought Henderson wanted agree with that the people that thought Edgar wanted agree with that it was a tightly contested fight so to really watch that and judge it you got to really shut your [ __ ] mouth and sit there with a p you got to know the game and you got to Mark things down and if you had the best would be if the judges had access to the information that Goldie and I have access to like we have access to all the takedown like the end of the round we have thing that comes up yeah this is fairly recently in the last few fights who's taking stock of that who does it it's UFC staff so the production staff is counting everything they're counting strikes and they're there's a whole like you know segment of the show where they'll go to effective strikes takeown attempts submission attempts so we get to look at hard numbers as well as like our gut feeling about things like there's sometimes a guy will land like little pity Pat shots and he'll land a bunch of them but the other dude lands one Haymaker well that Haymaker is worth more than those pity Pat shots so sometimes numbers don't necessarily mean but it's good to have that information to add in addition to your calculations on how you feel about it just watching it so you need almost more than you watching it on your own because I'm not just watching it I'm getting fed information as I'm watching it that's ideal for a judge not that it would really you know I just it not that it wouldn't help to clean house and just get people in and know what the [ __ ] is
going on in an actual fight that certainly would be but also think they need access to information the way we have they finally gave them monitors they get monitors now which is very nice that's huge I'm surprised they they finally gave them to yeah they not everywhere but C in slow motion would strike very important very important as well as to have angles on shots you know there's sometimes it looks like a guy landed when really the guy fell the guy slipped you know there's there's all sort of weird no it's not it's very hard and it's not rewarded when they're good at it no it's only critiqued when they suck at it you know know I'm I'm I swear to God man when when I have a weekend like this weekend where we did the the show at the Paramount and we did the The Comedy Works in denare meet all these cool people and everything it really does feel like this crazy [ __ ] dream life man it's so fun everything is so fun you've earned it and you've created yeah nobody earns this dude no nobody deserves this this is some crazy lucky [ __ ] it ain't just that you earn it because it didn't even exist before it's not like you say you earned being the U successful but you know what I'm saying I was the commentator other people had done it but I'm saying you know when I was a young man thinking about this as an aspiration this job didn't even exist you know like that's just fortunate remember I remember when you got it when you were like hey I'm I'm I'm I'm going to do the UFC and I came down with you and I met tank abbit back then and I was geez it's so fortunate though ridiculous yeah Jeff bat great guy great guy love that guy Olympic gold medals and it's so it's so strange to to have like that kind of of a life you know it's so strange to have all these cool friends and to like have this dream weekend when we were all hanging around you and me and Joey Diaz and Brendan Walsh and Doug Benson we were eating after the show after the UFC we were laughing drinking good wine drinking good wine eating Sliders in Buffalo Wings and just killing it all of us laughing at each other I mean that's like we're so [ __ ] fortunate man that's what that's what you left that message you're like we're so lucky we get to do what we do we're so fortunate in every aspect in the friends that we have and our
occupations and you know it's it's completely amazing but to to do what we did to get like this this posy of comedians together for that show like at the paramont that is really important it's one of the things that we were talking about before you got there I was telling them like I was thanking them for coming and I was like you guys like there might be 2,000 people out there for this show but if you guys weren't with me it wouldn't be half as fun literally wouldn't even be share with you have a frat you can share it with you know I love watching Joey Diaz get off stage with a giant smile on his face just laughing his ass off high five he's so authentic and original we had some really good talks man he's the best um listen I've but i' love but I say you ain't going anywhere if I we're here for another 10 minutes at least 10 minutes 10 minutes got to get out here 10 minutes the I'm supposed to be there in 10 minutes they can suck it they can suck because they might they might they're might it's the 10-minute podcast I got without you that's not a good show I know but I got to I got to no it's actually they're going to wait they're going to be f by the way go to go to the 10-minute podcast and listen to Drunk Arnold that will sass does if you don't laugh your ass off to me it's the best impression of all time and it's the funniest thing I've ever done it's a funny one because Arnold is like I don't I hardly do my Arnold impression anymore too many people Arnold is so [ __ ] hilarious we have some I'm really proud of some of the things we did on that show I mean and I like the idea it's great idea [ __ ] great 10 minutes SASS and de do some [ __ ] characters on there forget me I did an ostrich expert but that doesn't matter go uh it's it's some of the funny [ __ ] I got to go what an ostrich this is my name is and ostrich are my my my specialty and the great question is if an ostrich is a bird why can he not fly and that's all I talk about minutes this what we need to work with with you we need to get H Raa with you together with your Brazilian jiu-jitsu rapist character and make something happen because that rapist character is there's two of the funniest moments in my life that I've experienced in my whole life
one of them is Joey Diaz on the Alex Jones Show where Joe they [ __ ] up and told Joey Diaz that he didn't have to worry about swearing because this part is on the internet and Joey Diaz just opened up a can of I cubin whoop ass on the he he it was he was telling a story about going through the TSA with weed tucked under his balls and about how those [ __ ] machines they don't scan [ __ ] and you know this is your [ __ ] tax dollars at work and Alex Jones is going crazy he goes check yourself before you wreck yourself big dicks in your ass is bad for your health Joe Diaz Facebook Twitter stay black and he and he leaves the room he literally wrecked the room I'm crying laughing my and it's and by the way we got it all on video it's all you know people that say I'm exaggerating it's all online Joey Diaz and the Alex Jones Show is a hundred versions of it on YouTube because it's so phenomenal I got to this there was that and there was you in the hotel room we were high as [ __ ] and I don't even think I think I just got the job with the UFC and we would all come out to the fights and it was it's a [ __ ] great guys event I mean it's so barbaric in men to go to [ __ ] did you see that fight holy [ __ ] that was crazy and afterwards we eat steaks and [ __ ] it was just such a a boy party I remember you and I actually went and like looked at Randy Couture we're like look at him look at him [ __ ] animal look at that it's Randy Couture he had a swollen knee I was like jeez we were upstairs and we were barbecued we were so high and you know we just have this group of really funny people hanging out together so we're just making each other laugh and Brian goes into this explanation like a ju-jitsu seminar I how to [ __ ] guys I was basically doing henso because I was training at henso and and of course I have nothing but the utmost respect for henso of course it was just the basic doing his character you know and come on guys okay like that you know when I take a guy take a guy like that put him to the m like that put to my M put dick there's like the the the way the the all the the parts like your spe that's on the internet somewhere I don't know where it is but it was on Eddie Bravo's video but it was like a window like you you had it was like one of those things he put it on his video but he we put it
on there as a fortune cookie you know what I'm talking about is that what they called we have to find it whatever so he he put it on there I think is that what it's called a fortune cookie I whatever the [ __ ] it's called when um when someone put something on their DVD and you you know you go and find it so he put on the like you had to press like a couple different things for it to come up it was one of those stupid things that people did before they realized that extra content you should let people watch it let people watch and so Eddie had that he thought it would be really funny and I also think he was worried about it was so dirty like connecting it to his thing I think he would do it now because like on mastering the yeah but you got to be careful when you're building a brand or whatever and if you're uh interested in that go to 10th Planet jiujitsu that.com because Eddie's got uh this a whole web series called mastering the system and a lot of that is with Hana who is this uh I don't want to tell you the whole story I don't want to give up the joke'll but um you got to get together with him and we'll do it I'm coming back on the podcast teach guys how to kiss guys uh I want to thank you guys dude [ __ ] yeah man you can come out on the podcast anytime you want I'll do extra ones for you if I'm if I have a full week we'll do one at night we'll always do it anytime you want man I'm sorry I have to leave early today it's no worries thank you everybody but you should tell those guys to [ __ ] themselves and stay here for a little while long we are we're on the internet right now as good as TW briany what we're doing right now as good as we do and we are and we are doing it now it's a game for me I want I love you too don't I got my commercial they're waiting but I can't I got to let you out of the house man this a [ __ ] there's animals out there security hold on let me let me let me let end this all right this podcast is over ladies and gentlemen go see Brian this weekend in San Diego at the American Comedy Company and go to the American Comedy Company support it it's great that San Diego finally got a real [ __ ] comedy club and it is a badass one thank you to Alienware MMA follow them on Twitter Alienware MMA on Twitter Alienware
sponsors through Sucker Punch entertainment a lot of Fighters and um they uh we really appreciate the [ __ ] out of that so we started using Alienware computers for uh all of our podcasts and if you're into gaming they're [ __ ] fantastic they're really awesome they sent us this uh 18-inch laptop and it's [ __ ] tremendous it's it's if you want to play games on them they're like the the graphics the speed they're really incredible they're pricey but they're they're really worth it they're they're incredible gaming computers and we thank them for supporting us because uh uh we uh we love the fact they hooked us up with computers we love them as a company we love the fact that they support MMA fighters we think it's a ballsy move and I I really appreciate the fact that Dell a big company has the the guts through Alienware their their which they own to step in and sponsor Fighters I think that's beautiful and so we support people who support MMA uh thanks to on it.com as well go get yourself some battle ropes and kettle bells so you could be manly like Brian call like throw that rope around [ __ ] get yourself a dancers physique I love you Amica get some Alpha Brain feed your brain with some nutrients and uh get your [ __ ] together you dirty [ __ ] look we love you uh we appreciate the podcast uh uh tweets and emails and and all that [ __ ] it literally um uh my life would not be as rich and interesting if it wasn't for how uh how how much positive energy we've gotten back from you people uh how much that is inspirational how much that makes us want to do more and and make it better and and put out more content and I appreciate the [ __ ] that all you guys are using this podcast to make your commute more interesting um to entertain you when you're on a plane uh you know whatever the [ __ ] you're using it for when you're at the gym I think it's awesome I I I love the connection that we have and uh thank you for all the positivity it's it it it inspires me to no end and that's it you dirty freaks tomorrow we will have Jamie kilstein on my favorite well not my favorite vegan he's one of my favorite vegans he's my favorite vegan Lefty comedian that weighs 8 lbs he's a great guy though and he's a very smart guy and he has his
besides his strange ideolog he's got his heart in the right place he's a good human and he'll be here tomorrow and then we have Andrew Dice Clay on Wednesday on Thursday we have uh we have uh two podcasts on Thursday you leaving you dirty [ __ ] you're the best um and uh you can find them on Twitter I got to go all right take care people big kiss love you