Video URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2fUl0Ldxgg
a little Brian had it out ciao what are you doing just hang it yeah um you're not sober are you this is a sober October 4 yeah now I'm doing it now you can get high a watch okay can I blow it on you yeah yeah I don't think that counts as uh-oh this is a joint yes this fellow really yeah that's all weed that's Mike Tyson's weed oh it's sweet yeah oh yes I got a torch cigar torch I could smoke a cigar with you oh sweet that's legal we re now were thinking that when we started sober October we started smoking cigars we were thinking maybe that will disqualify us and when you just quit yeah what does it they Kabuto how's that well Jeff yeah yeah but it's it can't really get you drunk you stay sober you'd have to drink a case of it to even catch a bug but if you schedule a doctor's appointment like a dentist appointment they gave you some okay yeah like what if you get surgery like what if somebody got their appendix taken out yeah you like to do any kind of like medication or medicine or no you have to die no there's no real rules for that I mean look it's not the thing about this contest that's really stupid is there's no consequences that's not even a friendly penalty of law there's nothing open first I'm on there I can have a glass of wine right now nothing had happened yeah oh no I lost yeah I'll tell you what though I've been getting a lot of messages from people that are inspired and it makes me feel real good I reached out to some dude yesterday on Instagram because he lost something like 200 [ __ ] pounds you know I mean it's crazy that's the duty of the scars all over because he he got his uh the extra skin removed after he lost all the way it's amazing sober October you know sometimes you just have to have a thing like that where everybody goes I'm gonna do it too and then it gives you the reason like a motivation to get going that sometimes that's all people need ma'am yeah I just got over that Aikido thing so now I'm just like [ __ ] that I feel like I'm free again like I can you know have normal food again and that's hard to do man Cheetos hard to do it kind of got to me to the point where now I'm like doing the opposite like I'm just like I want to eat everything
because I've been wanting to eat pizza for so long and like Catholic school girls tell him to stay away from tech and they can't wait hold of 90% that's what it is it's people don't like being told what to do they don't like being forced into something that they don't enjoy that's you know that's why school is ineffective that's why so many things don't work but the the keto thing the problem with it is I think it's a healthy thing for a lot of folks if you have epilepsy apparently it's the thing because it can stop your seizures you know there's people that have epilepsy they get ketogenic and it just kicks it to kicks it off it just you don't you don't get seizures anymore but it's boring so now and then I want pasta and also fruit I like fruit that was the biggest one for me just fruit like watermelon you know great just having some watermelon in the morning is you know it's the most delicious food ever I think like a good perfect watermelon on a hot day my god it's amazing you know it's fun it's a [ __ ] up fruit though cuz it's only racist fruit you know it's like the only fruits it's attached to racism there's no other fruit where you can make fun of someone for eating and it's like racist if you're had that um durian [ __ ] yeah so it's good it's not bad right god it smells smells horrible it smells horrible have you had it's like they have it in Thailand in Thailand they love it I tried it in Thailand it's like this weird sex spike dealer yeah spiky on the outside then the inside it's kind of mango like sort of like a pale mango it's not my favorite but I tried it but goddamn it smells like dog [ __ ] it smells so bad that they ban it in a lot of hotels because people will go into hotels and you know like folks that they come from a culture where they eat that stuff all the time they'll bring bags of it the whole family is eating that stuff and it walks down the hallway and people like what in the [ __ ] says it smells like Limburger all right hair de Limburger yeah it's got a weird smell you can't take it on public land transportation in some places either Wow yeah it stinks it's weird that tastes good my friend did that fasting diet you know that's the one that everyone's not fasting the one where you only eat like
a small part of the day yeah I did that yeah intermittent fast intermittent fasting and he woke up sleepwalking one night and found out on his nest cams like his security cameras he goes into the bathroom passes in like not falls down and hits his head and he showed a picture it's just blood everywhere in his bathroom goes back to bed didn't even know about it wakes up and he sees blood everywhere checks his cameras finally sleepwalking a couple days later he starts having seizures like like out of the blue because the doctor doctor says it's because of that that diet he was doing his brain was starving that's what that doctor said that doctor was making [ __ ] yeah yeah that guy needs to go to the neurologist he's probably got a [ __ ] brain tumor one thing though I did know is that when I was on keto I slept walked a lot and it I think was my body trying to find sugar really yeah because I'd never sleepwalk because I have cameras in my living room and yeah I know it's kind of weird but when I was on keto I slept walk maybe ten times having since I've been off having slept walk once and you say slept boss laughter I'd slept once sleepwalk is it sleep when you talk about past tense is it sleep walked or slept slept walk it's sleep sleep I've never sleep walked yeah i sleepwalk but I don't think I've ever heard anybody say it's past tense you can't pass tense the first part of the compound word oh it's a weird one weird slept I slept well last night but I slept walked yeah I did some sleepwalking you could say that sleepwalking hmm yeah I think that's kind of interesting I wonder if it was my body craving sugar so bad that it woke me up because I was like going through the cupboards trying to find sugar oh well that make sense yeah it was that I don't remember any of it then how long will you kiddo for seven months yeah eight months hmm the intermittent fasting is a good move because I think most of the time look for me I eat when I'm bored I do it all the time like when I come home from the store and I'm riding I just start eating and then I'm like what am i doing because I try to do intermittent fasting so that means if I come home it's midnight and I'm riding and I start eating that means I can't eat until 2:00
in the afternoon the next day and just don't wake up till to have kids I will have responsibilities I'm not I'm not a like a Peter Pan like you all right no I I think that would be the the diet that makes the most sense but because I already seem to only eat once a day which it's not healthy though it to you once a day no it's not you should get a nutritionist you got some cash you should hire a trainer and get a nutritionist yeah I think about going back to Weight Watchers I'm almost at my fattest level right now I want to get really fat and then take that before that's and you want a strategy before I'm like you keep saying you're gonna lose weight you like I know what I'm doing I'm gonna get really big like why because I always forget to take the before photo and then I can't wait through a diet like dammit now I'm just gonna be normal now it's like oh yeah but you didn't look that bad before you gotten a big fat beard on just this beard it looks like I gained 20 pounds yeah just shave the beard at the end it's sort of like when people get a tan and they're after photos and they look more ripped yeah you know before after like after you just tan bro Tan was better lighting yeah yeah I follow a lot of bodybuilder girls and I don't know why it's disturbing to me but when they start cutting down weight and then you see them like monitoring their food and watching their portions and [ __ ] they're getting leaner and leaner it bothers me like I get nervous why I don't know I'm like this I don't do that like it's [ __ ] why like what are you doing just losing all your fat just so you can get on stage and squeeze everything and pose I get it you know but I don't see I don't think that looks the best that's why I understand that's what weird Smee out I don't think it looks the best especially for ladies when you like super shredded it just doesn't I don't even like when you have those those man shoulders you know where you see like a really girl beautiful girl and she takes off her cardigan or whatever and you're like oh she has like her frame looks like a man that doesn't bother me oh I I mean she's durable it bothers me when they get shredded I don't know why I just see it seems like they're suffering like it's it seems like a mistake you know
what I mean like like I guess maybe I guess this is probably what it is I guess I connected to anorexics because anorexics legitimately freaked me out there was this one girl that I used to yoga with and it was so sad man it was so sad she would come in and everyone would feel like [ __ ] she was like 80 pounds her whole body was bones she was just bones yoky in Phoenix and a joker oh my god I do to get down to that I lost 50 pounds and his shoulder looked all [ __ ] up too well he was just posing in weird ways too I mean he nailed that role dude he really seen it I didn't want it oh no spoilers if you you think I should go to the theater for this one no you can watch it on okay I mean it when's it coming out at home you'd have to wait it just came out so yourself to wait oh there's a new thing apparently where you can get home movies at home what home movies of course you can get theater no not on new insurance you did it like legitimately and you pay quite a bit of money really yeah yeah yeah there's a some new thing yeah that should be a thing like you pay how many people would you normally go to a movie with like four people each tickets about 20 bucks nowadays no pay 60 bucks so you can rent it for 24 hours that would be the [ __ ] yeah I wanted to do the opposite I wasn't I was trying to look up to see how much it would cost to rent interstellar to have a screening at the Chinese Theatre in Hollywood mmm that was the coolest movie and sound I've ever seen and I want people I know to experience that oh so awesome mmm how many I don't like it's do you know how much it could you can do screenings there I think you'd have to figure how much it cost to rent that the print of the movie yeah there used to be thirty five-millimeter prints when I was a projection as they people would rent like hey we just rented back to the future for our company picnic and he would like as a projectionist he would get it in the mail with all the other films in your bag what the [ __ ] wise back to the future hearings I think I don't think it's that much I think it's only a couple hundred well we have a JRE movie night we rent a movie theater hey that would be the [ __ ] where do we go though and your big theater so you know where you
want to go you want to go to the one of them cine appleís Cinna appleís and the ones drinks yeah they have drinks I'm food and does the seats lean back you get an assigned seat to do this yeah we should find out yeah Rick I wanted to watch those movies like that roar movie with the Tigers or the otherwise well according to Joey Diaz the new Rambo is Roadhouse times a million he goes Joe Rogan you gotta see this [ __ ] movie I was crying and laughing I was crying laughing he goes it's Roadhouse times a million it seems like it it looks ridiculous well he's a thousand years old he's [ __ ] everybody up and I was already was low-budget though like like really like what it was a surprisingly low budget maybe he's like decided and he's gonna keep all his money when you're that age right like how old is Stallone now was he's 77 let's guess how old 74 I bet and II think he's older younger than Arnold Schwarzenegger I think he's older how old is a Jamie I want to say 72 but I'd okay a year older let's try I'm saying 76 74 73 73 just turned 73 July 6 okay so when you're 73 you got to feel like at the most if everything goes amazing you got 30 years in the last 10 you ain't gonna remember [ __ ] so you got 20 years to burn through a big-ass pile of cash what are you doing it all on Rambo movies coyote on a golf course why is he off a coyote on a golf course is that to keep like birds away or some [ __ ] I don't know whatever the protective what is he doing he's got some skinny legs man take that picture of his legs again that is crazy that makes me nervous that he can walk upstairs what's up why is his leg so skinny that looks like an injury or something like his leg is shrunk now look weird I mean he doesn't even look like he has anybody right there he's so jacked though apparently in that movie he's super jacked he might have like knee and back problems though when you got back problems man your legs shrink I was [ __ ] jacked when you uh I know it dude has got a severe back problem in one of his legs is like shriveled up because his nerves aren't firing correctly he went to Germany apparently and he got a bunch of disks replaced and it just didn't work well and he's just got all sorts of
inflammation and scar tissue and his nerves are blocked off like he you know he had a bunch of [ __ ] up discs so he went he got a bunch of him replaced in one shot and stayed over there for a few months and now his body's just [ __ ] up like left and right well you get Rick real back problems are [ __ ] scary as [ __ ] I sent Dean Delray to lifespan lifespan medicine to deal with his neck Dean Delray he's got a bulging disc so bad he's like dude I worry when people bump into me when people bump into him he's in pain yeah I thought he had a stroke yeah like if you pass you pass by him and accidentally like bump into him a little bit he's like ah like he gets a stinger from a head banging or um no from a motorcycle crash some messed up lady nailed him on a lever from a few years ago yeah he got [ __ ] up pretty bad and it's not getting any better yeah it was so weird because he's like I quit riding bikes you know for after that but then he got a bike like six months later like what the [ __ ] are you doing you you you almost died well I think for Dean you know he's trying to make some he bought a nice car like a Porsche he had a great deal on it and then he flipped it you know yeah I'm not flipped it like died in the crash like Kevin Hart style he just he turned it over and made some money right of it yeah yeah yeah and so I think that's when he bought a bike yeah I guess people who love bikes man they they think it's worth a risk [ __ ] that out here I can't believe that there's not more are those scooter deaths everywhere I know right yeah dude those things are goddamn fast well we're in Denver they're everywhere and everybody's riding those electric scooters all over the place you like is that really how you want to go out did you know the fast 24 hour do yours looks pretty good way faster than those bird shoot all this do you chase that [ __ ] I don't trust that [ __ ] anymore I flipped over my bike a couple years ago I'm like it's something that's that's a message John yeah I know too many people that aren't broken my friend broke both of his arms on one of those scooters he flipped and he landed on his arms both of his arms and he had to have his mom live with him for like a couple months because he couldn't do anything when I
was doing zookeeper with Kevin James I did a lot of my own bike riding and I [ __ ] wiped out hard because I didn't realize that if you we were in this scene where he was beside me and I was trying to hit him with a flag and he was beside me on his bike and I was holding on to the handlebars with my left hand which is your front wheel so when I hit the brakes on my left hand I just went flying over the top of the handlebars I didn't do it just once either I [ __ ] wiped out pretty hot like here what what DVD extra hey watch boom ow yeah it's a pretty good wipeout yeah that's exactly what I did in my bike I flipped over like exactly like that but I got lucky didn't get hurt but it's just luck you know you land on your arm wrong the elbow goes backwards and then you're [ __ ] and that was just you grabbing the brake to the wrong breaker yeah yeah I just went over the handlebars but you could you know bikes you could get [ __ ] up then when I was in Utah recently we were driving down the road and we saw this lady fall on her bike she was across the street on the other side and she was trying to she was trying to do something and she just got tangled up in her pedal and just dumped over and landed on one arm tried to post on her left arm and snapped her arm and then she couldn't get out she's screaming so we went over and pulled over and people don't know how to deal with injuries so people are like okay let's take your backpack off I got don't touch her I go she has a broken arm listen to me don't touch her you know and I'm like listen we got we gotta we're gonna get you a hospital well you know we'll get you an ambulance it was lucky that she was like a block away from the police station but people want to do things they want to like oh they let's take our arm and put it in a splint and let's let's let's tape it up no no don't do [ __ ] yes you neck injuries also and like car accidents people are like ninety minutes well Kevin Hart's accident they pulled him out of the truck out of the car and then they took him to his house I'm like and he had three broken vertebrae like yeah don't don't do that don't touch anybody like you can like you could just yank someone the wrong way after an injury and make them way
way worse especially something like this ladies arm was so obviously broken the cops didn't even notice it the cops came over and they're like oh so how's everything right now you feeling okay anything wrong I go she's got a broken arm it's like where's the arm program I got a look at her left arm it's like oh my god look [ __ ] left arm was so broken it's like when you see someone's broke like broken bones and unfortunately I'm really used to it I see so many injuries from fights you know from the UFC I'm so used to seeing breaks and things broken I just looked at I'm like yep that's that is like her elbow was like her arm went straight and her elbow went back I'm like we're not moving don't take her back back off but she started hyperventilating she had never broken anything she's 50 she's like I never broken a bone before I'm like it's not a bad one it's just an arm like you're gonna be alright put it in the cast you know six weeks from now you're gonna be laughing at this people sign your cast you'll have a funny story you know it's just a broken arm have you ever broken arm Jamie I'm not gonna what have not broken a bone no bones what about you same here we got that Ohio water dairy yeah that in no contact sports big football state come on Joe did you play football yeah I'm not in high school but up to high school up to high school well when you're a little kid it seems like you just get [ __ ] plowed over and you're Bend and now they don't even know each other they're just the dad will just grab you and just smack you and each other but kids are so light they're so light and they just bounce off each other when we turn my bikes have you seen this before I'm gonna play this video but [ __ ] this this is this it's called the like mountain of hell there's another name for it too I can remember like now naka lips or something like that they start in France on the top of the Alps thousand bikers is that snow yes on the top of a glacier you end up going like 5,000 feet downhill so I could take a mile or two down you're riding on ice yeah these are the guys in front but here in a second when they have to turn it creates this [ __ ] insane pileup of a plate you can't avoid yeah you have to be a god oh my god don't happen here we
go here's the first one and then it just causes a major pileup be fun bang boom and then dudes are trying to dive out of the way yeah I'm just going downhill it's like on a ski slope but everyone's on mountain bikes for those that are listening oh now oh it's like ants yeah and then dudes are braking early to try to avoid it and they just wipe it out at the top oh my god this is what a stupid thing to do when you know that that many people are gonna crash leave this guy on the outside trying to go fellas I made it down there yet still at the top yeah and then gonna try to figure out a path but you can't really hit the brakes right you're on ice yeah going downhill and I saw yeah that works this is so dumb look at that boom but if you make it out of there and you're safe and you get to win what is that what do you win there might be some money at the end I don't know it's like doing so Brockton wah songs you get a croissant yeah it's just like so rocked over it's just stupid yeah with the best thing I really believe the best thing about sober October's it inspires people that actually do have a problem Bert Kreischer inspires people – Bert Kreischer and here's a crazy thing that Bert Kreischer told me because you know Ari Shaffir and him had a little bit of an incident with some MDMA oh if you know about that Bert said that ever since taking that MDMA he has zero desire to drink he said it really cleaned it out and that he heard that when you take ecstasy that ecstasy like kills your desire to drink that it does something to you to make makes drinking seem really silly and he said he's super focused it probably was actually on honestly everybody could think for him if he hadn't done in a while because there is positives for doing it I mean yeah circumstances were not the best the circumstances were the worst at home with his kids already dosing them but he said that uh you know he feels amazing and that like he really does feel focused and clear that's great huh if Ari would have done to me I wouldn't have cared as much but yeah your body's like a [ __ ] no I was wondering because I did a pot his podcast the day before you one of his gonna dope you know I was I was wondering if he did and then it was like
oh I didn't work as we ended up crossed for our podcast and I'm like did I because we did smoke a lot of weed but I'm like did I maybe I was doing man yeah well I remember I gave Chris Maguire some weed and he was sure that it was laced with something yeah you know he was like this is not regular weed something in this something he was like really paranoid that there was something in it you know like if you if you don't if you're not use this California weed and you don't smoke a lot and then you're like oh alright I'll have a couple come on guys you know and you get a peer pressured into it yeah well I had something the other day that [ __ ] me up it was because they don't tell you especially when you're at the Comedy Store everyone's just passing joints so this one person was one of those weed fanatics where he had put Keef on it and whatever oil THC oil like I had like three things on it those guys some [ __ ] off yeah those guys they they give you these joints and it's got like it looks golden when you open it up it's just got so much Keef and all the the oils and the hash oil in there that's ridiculous like why do you want to get that high like what is wrong with them their tolerance like I guess you know like I can't I don't understand it's like I can take two hits of the shittiest joint and be like you know what that was great I'm fine if you ever do be real smokebox be very good yeah I've been that's too hectic please be careful cuz you got to drive home after that and you don't even know where you are if it wasn't for navigation systems I'd still be living in downtown LA yeah I would have never figured out how to get home that's what the test that comes in for Drive for you yeah it's like these guys just smoke all day every day and to them that's their baseline like their normal is just being SuperDuper high so they're they're used to it like that we weed we got so high before we even got into the car you know and then you get into the car with the cameras in it and then they do like this podcast and you like it's surreal it's like an out-of-body experience yeah and you feel really paranoid and really worked up like long yeah no thanks I don't like that [ __ ] I don't like that why why why even bother
doing that no one likes that they do obviously somebody likes that how there's people that like that yeah they put their like the leaf blowers full of wheat and just blow it on each other it's tons of videos I was like High Times conventions and yeah cannabis cops can they take a leaf blower and they pump a bong up yeah it's ridiculous I mean but this is like these are the arguments for weed being illegal it's like look at these idiots it's not a butt chuggin butt chug light show yeah but the thing is like it's weird it's like we have this line of personal responsibility right you can go to any bar and they don't check to see if you've already been drinking they don't know what your tolerance is they don't anything you get any bar you give me two shots of Jack Daniels and a Grey Goose on the rocks there just give it to you bang nobody cares they just think you could figure it out you know how much of a responsibility is a bartender actually had a lot who then yeah they can go they can go to jail to the bartender can if they don't negotiate I think yeah that to me is so ridiculous I don't think the but I think over-serve like if you get over certain and they can prove it you're just as responsible if he can't like drives home drunk didn't kill somebody do you well if you know someone's gonna drive this the problem is like I was talking about this on stage once that the real problem with drunk driving is not that people can't drive when they're drunk the problem when you're drinking is you don't know if you can drive or not you don't know how drunk you are because you're drunk like you might have three drinks and you might fail a drunk driving breathalyzer but you might be able to drive perfectly you know but if you have four drinks or five drinks you might think it's okay to have six or seven like you don't know where you are you don't know like where you are on the spectrum of drunk or not drunk when you're really drunk that's part of being drunk what the [ __ ] going on that's why I like that's why the consent issue when you're really drunk is weird you know it's because it's like some people like to get drunk and have sex and then some people say well you should never have sex with someone when they're drunk
because they can't consent because they're drunk okay but then that's like 90% of all people having sex yeah how many people have sex while they're drunk I only have well I think autonomous cars it's gonna that's gonna be very interesting how they deal with alcohol and autonomous cars because if like you have a drunk mode like if autonomous car like say if you have a Tesla in 2026 right and it has the option to be completely autonomous it drives on its own or you can go manual so it detects that you're drunk says mr. Redmayne you are intoxicated we would like to drive and then you have to let it take you like would you get but do you think there's gonna be a complaint in time where drunk driving doesn't apply because your car is gonna drive you home it makes the final decision for you I'm all for it like just it wouldn't be hard to have a breathalyzer on a car I did do that now yeah I have a friend who he he got arrested for a DUI like more than one and he had to blow into his thing on his van as work van hit a blow and his little thing before it would let him start the car this is another demolition man coming full circle again because there's that scene where he gets in and he makes the car he's like give me give me control and she's like what the [ __ ] are you doing you're gonna drive he's like yeah manual control give me that [ __ ] he took chases after what year was demolition man's place be in now I think I'll double-check I need to watch that again they're doing that THC a breathalyzer next year what are they gonna find out supposedly it detects if there's THC like if you have smoked in the last whatever three problem with that is there's I don't they've done studies that show that people drive well when they're high you know they have done studies there's been these tests and they're not you know it's not randomized double-blind placebo-controlled studies but they are they have done some studies where they show that people drive well hi I know they have twenty twenty thirty two is far away that's actually pretty close it gets frozen for 36 years and wakes up in 2032 oh wow is that funny what they used to think is gonna be going on like yeah mm they'll just be able to freeze you what wasn't
that back to the future that was like 2017 or something like that for – yeah and then you look at you're like that's yeah when when they came but yeah the second one the attractive future – yeah I know wait nobody ever gets it right like they get a couple things right but everybody thinks we're gonna be way more advanced than we are remember space 1999 do you remember that 1999 what's that it was a TV show oh he thought that 1999 we're just gonna be flying around spaceships and living on the moon they're always wrong well you're as the Jetsons supposed to be way off I was like 1950 what year was that supposed to be yeah the Jetsons they had flying cars but you see the problem with three dimensions is you got to keep people locked into grids because that way you can keep them from just going up or down or left or right randomly like birds and slamming into each other that's probably well how it's gonna be though it's probably going to be autumn you know you could only do it with the Tesla driving right right if it goes flying you mean mm-hmm do you think they'll have that yeah because that we have to stay in a grid there have to be some kind of traffic you know to that people we can't be flying all over the like you say all over the place see right so they'll have to have like lanes in the sky but by that time we're probably not gonna have any control of it it's probably all gonna be probably right yeah well that's why helicopters are so weird because helicopters if you get a pilot's light like when I went up with BRR I was surprised and how much freedom you have like we were flying around downtown LA it was like let's go here you just take a left in the sky go right go down go up go around here we were we were really close to buildings and you'd be amazed at how many buildings in downtown LA have helicopter paths on the roof and so you land on the roof you get out you open a door you go downstairs you avoid all the [ __ ] apparently that's the move in New York City Tommy buns was saying that right I think it's called yeah so subscribe over Hydra has helicopter now in New York City we were helicopter imagine some chatty uber driver that's flying a [ __ ] helicopter won't shut
up that's what Kobe Bryant did when he first got like his first big contract I heard he moved down to Orange County and was just flying a helicopter every day to practice downtown magic flying all that trash store be sick yeah if you just go super baller Kevin Hart style put a [ __ ] helicopter pad on the roof of the store how do you want in the Hyatt right no no no they have a rooftop like bar up there yeah I mean the next door one last thought was the Hyatt you weren't even living here yeah it wasn't that long ago yeah it's beyond up there when it was the Hyatt really yeah it might have been 10 years ago more actually yeah it seems like it's been when what was it when that dude jumped off of it I was a long time that was before well was the 70s I think cuz it was during the strike when people didn't get paid to do comedy at the store right and the guy who'd jumped off they said he wasn't even good it's like one of those guys that's like yeah I'm gonna [ __ ] do this for everybody and everybody say hey man you don't even really working you know I mean like there's always those guy that's one of the weird things about the store there's there's comics that are hanging around there that are all working you know and then there's a few people that will never work and you know they'll never work and they know the devil but they're always they're kind of comics cuz they've done it a few times right they're more just there for the bar is there for the hang they hang yeah but it gets weird right all sudden they're in your conference and yeah there's a lot of people like that but luckily lately that I mean there hasn't been as many I don't think because I think they've been kind of getting called out more by other comics Wow it's kids weird it's you know can you imagine if that was the case with other occupations you know like CEOs of corporations hang out with people who want to be CEOs but they never really started a business they're all just hanging out together that's one of the weird things about art so anybody can create it and no one's to say that someone who sucks can't just figure it out there's nothing stopping you from figuring it out but something is like something keeps you from figuring out but you don't know what it
is like how many comics do you know that used to suck and that became good I know a few I know quite a few I know some of them some of them who struggled early in the day and you like wow I don't know about this guy I hope he makes it and then look Sebastian had a hard time Sebastian used to have a hard time now he's one of the biggest comics on the planet Earth he's [ __ ] huge my friend Mark Telegraph they sent me a picture of Sebastian on stage at Boston Garden in the round 18,000 people and I'm like look at him look at him like I remember when he was strong on his first start now he was he's like a great success story he really is because he was a waiter at the Four Seasons his waiting tables and also doing stand-up at night you see him he's [ __ ] hilarious you see him at the antique me Music Awards this year yeah that was a mistake I could have told him that was a mistake but I feel funny like he's coming out to like he's like hey you know I don't know that's like it's like a bad thing hire like does it make sense he wants to do it wants to do it Jessel necks not gonna do it you know who the [ __ ] gonna do it who you gonna get to do it Jeff Ross would he do it he would yeah he'd probably do it I mean you can keep robably get some comics to do it they Jeff could probably pull it off he's that's like his kind of gig [ __ ] around talking [ __ ] writing jokes about it but Sebastian is like he's Sebastian that's his thing his thing is being Sebastian right oh my – old-school you know that's his joke like these phones you know whatever but you don't want to see him like hose up you want to see him – an hour set you want to see him do his set you don't see him some [ __ ] malarkey yeah awards show a bunch of music that you know he doesn't listen to he's probably listened to the temptations every night [ __ ] you know probably goes to bed – Frank Sinatra Springsteen but heat I did it mom on repeat yeah yeah I probably plays it over and over again yeah the summer winds came blowing in do you see the Phil Hartman documentary no that was interesting I didn't know a lot of it they really uh really you're in it a little bit I didn't know a lot of things one thing I didn't know is how they gave you a part in the show where it was
supposed to be Phil's character writing you or something like that like a will or something and they gave it to each person of the cast and they didn't let you read it beforehand so that when you were reading it in the show it was actually your first time reading like this letter that was supposed to be from Phil yeah and I didn't know that that was amazing yeah that was that was one of the weirdest moments of my life you know getting phone calls that he was dead my phone just kept ringing people just kept calling and friends and loved ones and family members and it was just it didn't seem real like who would kill that guy he was the nicest guy I wish you hadn't met him yeah he was so cool like the [ __ ] everybody liked that guy and he used to like to get high and go to strip clubs yeah he's like get high and go to strip clubs get high and riding around his boat I went to a strip club with him do you remember which one um I think it was Bob's classy lady I think that's what it was called I don't think it's around anymore but he had an appreciation for these young ladies that was like it was it was almost childlike but it wasn't creepy he was like god you're beautiful you look him because he was high he was like look amazing this is incredible like he was having a good time he was it he was a really really unique character I remember there was a guy who was some guy was blackmailing him and some guy had filmed him at a strip club with his wife and his wife was getting a lap dance and he was getting a lap dance too and the guy was like he wrote some really P letter saying that this is gonna violate the policies cuz you know fill it had endorsements and commercial deals and he was doing movies and stuff like that he was just blowing up got it Ferrari you know he's blowing up and this guy uh went to his house and nailed this VHS tape in an envelope to his garage door and I was with him on on a phone call so feels like I'm gonna talk to him right now I'm gonna come come come come into my room so I went in his dressing room and the guy calls me Lizzie hey what's going on buddy he was talking to the kind of like the guy was his friend and they were setting the guy up and you know Phil was gonna give him like I
don't forget what the money was tens of thousands of dollars meet me at this place and I'll meet you there and he had these for lack of a better term he had someone who's a dangerous person meet this guy and let him know in no uncertain terms that his life is gonna take a terrible turn for the worst if he continued down this path and but it was uh it was weird to see like someone trying to exploit him and the guy was so dumb he actually met with Phil like Phil knew who the guy was like he saw his face you know I was there with the guy was like look you know I just need some money and feels like I get it so big deal no it's just it's weird when you see someone trying to like prey on like they think that's their way out like this is my way out I'm just gonna get this guy to give me some money and I'm gonna put it all together you get it fell I mean I just need some money he's like I get it buddy no big deal I was just playing this guy along until the dangerous men came and talked to him Wow they also really focused a lot on the wife which I didn't really know much about about how she wanted to be an actress also and like she was trying to get Phil to like put her into shows and doing that you know and stuff like that and she was very resentful of them yeah she would insult him like insult him publicly like oh it was just really gross sad but he didn't think he should get divorced because he felt like it was bad for his image he was like really concerned about his image cuz he was like this squeaky-clean family guy who was you know I mean it was really starting to take off for him so you feel didn't really make it until he was older in life like I don't think he was I don't think he got on Sara alive until he was in his late late thirties might've been older than that and when he was on Newsradio I think he was like 46 yeah who if so he was like he had worked as a graphic artist you know he that you see that um album cover that's out there pinned to the wall yeah that's him yeah he drew that yeah she's drawn a few amazing things I was very surprised about that his a super versatile guy he could do a lot of different things and his work ethic was amazing like he would have a binder and his scenes he would have different color tabs for each scene
and he would go over his notes and go over his lines like I'd never seen anybody do it like none of us did none of the rest of us did like the only the only one who's like him like Steven root was even more different than him because Steven root was a character like you played Jimmy James and he in real life is like the sweetest most normal guy but when he was playing that character like he would become this Jimmy James guy it was spooky like you've seen him in a million like off what is the movie know Isis data yes tape ler yeah no D piece dude he was great in that new Western – what is it The Ballad of Scruggs Buster Scruggs what is it called it's a Coen Brothers thing right isn't it it's really weird have you seen that no I haven't seen it it's very weird it's very weird it's really good but it's like whoa all right it's just weird you know but but Stephen root is in it's amazing he's just a real actor you know what else dude I mean I would never do a sitcom again ever but I'm so glad I did do it like I learned a lot and it was a great experience did you see Andy did got arrested again he yeah I canif you and Tommy weren't like buddy cops you wouldn't do that around shooting people with guns I do a sketch who cares about TV anymore right like it's saying anything I don't watch any TV shows except for cart the South parks and that you know the cartoons and stuff but there's not like a sitcom I give a [ __ ] about you know there's only existent was I caught up by Mexican Joker last night it's great yeah I was trying to catch up cuz I saw their they have a new one tonight oh yeah they got controversy with China it's worth those those are the guys that still to this day I look forward to watching every week they go hard in the paint do you see the response that traded to China no Jimmy he said I so yeah trade didn't an official response to China of them and that that's what yeah I feel explain to everybody what happened so they had South Park had an episode that kind of mimicked or made fun of the mba's response or the president of the NBA's a response to China that was in the news recently and it's about how Hollywood edits their films like Iron Man 3 has a
host 12 minute scene that they added just for the Chinese release because they like make things to make China happy so they can make more money because there's so many millions of people in China what did they have it you know I it was a scene of an Asian doctor in like I think they were taking out the thing in his chest and saving his life or something like that yeah they added Asians to it and I think they cut a lot this happens a lot in Hollywood I guess they they did they edit for like a Chinese version where they even add stuff to it and make it more Chinese happy so that so Trey Parker and Matt Stone made this whole episode about that and of course you know I got banned from China China scrubbed the whole internet free of everything official apology to China from Trey Parker and Matt Stone like the NBA we welcome the Chinese censors into our homes into our hearts we do love money more than freedom and democracy what how do you say X I G I think G doesn't look just like Winnie the Pooh at all tune in to our 300th episode this day at 10:00 long live the great Communist Party of China may this autumns sorghum harvest be bountiful we good now China oh my god he's the best he's the best are the best they are the best I love them they're the best we too love money say that pull it up put up the exact quote again what does it say we too love money more than freedom and democracy she doesn't look just like Winnie the Pooh at all like yeah just adding that just 300th episode that's what we welcome the Chinese censors into our homes and into our hearts like the NBA well the NBA thing is a weird one right like the guy like he's he's like super social justice warrior II he's always criticizing this and that when it came to China he's like huh everything's really good over there oh yeah the Commissioner Jim yeah What did he say I don't know what he said necessarily he definitely soft peddled yeah he's flowing over there now that I have a meeting about it yeah and there's there's a chance even that I heard that he might even could even get fired from this because that's how much money that NBA as a company is gonna be losing from China China now what is the big deal about China they just like basketball or
is it just just a giant market so many people yeah they've got them hooked lying on on basketball since like yeah Ming back in the next 15 years ago got in there what about linsanity is that still going on he got popped it he's he signed to play over there this year actually what happened with him he took off he was kicking ass for like a very short period of time he had a very good NBA career he just won an NBA title with the Toronto Raptors but Korean people stopped talking about him it was a hype train that happened and he like had a very good run of like 10 12 games he was in part of it was he was in New York with the New York media train the Knicks they weren't very good I'm not very good now but that it all got wrapped up and all that kind of oh and then he got sent off to another team and went you in a small market kind of everyone kind of forgets about you the whole China things very strange man we got hit up by someone from Huawei once it come on the podcast yeah no thanks good yeah oh the phone I'm so yeah yeah drop some phones off the days listen to everything you do follow you home that's really interesting that'd be like one of those phones you leave at work and you wake up in the morning it sit on your sink hey [ __ ] what's going on here hey man it's like a black mirror episode those Huawei phones are [ __ ] badass though that's the thing it's like look I wish it no here's the deal okay I gave a thorough examination I went from the iPhone 10s max whatever the [ __ ] the last one was and then I got a note ten and then I got the new one the iPhone 11x maxpro [ __ ] your mother whatever it is the the note can't [ __ ] with it at all write the notes just not it's good it's clumsy they're not as good they're clunky their their keyboard sucks where's keyboard ever made I don't understand why people don't [ __ ] about that more than there's a you can add those other keyboards they laid out they're a little bit better it but not Apple just got the keyboard down down down down it's like you don't realize how much better Apple's keyboards are until you try and this is only on their phones their laptops our dog [ __ ] well the laptops keyboards are so bad
I got a 15-inch one there's companies that take the old ones the old 15-inch ones from like 2012 and they put a SSD card they put a solid state hard drive in it and update the processor and update the graphics they update everything and they give you like one terabyte of storage but they basically pile modern internal components into the old shell so you get the real keyboard a keyboard that you can actually feel the keys you actually feel where they are and you feel them moving around the new keys those flat [ __ ] keys are just so bad you're gonna hate the future of MacBook Pros so you might as well just switch I like that because the definitely is going to become a screen on the bottom as a keyboard what yeah they're definitely gonna use the letter feedback word it you know just so if you guys so it sounds like you're tapping on the screen but you're actually just gonna have a whole screen and they pulled pressure-sensitive off the new iPhones yeah so it's just long press not pressing because no one used it yeah and no mine's very nice what everybody usually did one of the few people because there's one thing that they haven't replaced yet like a lot of the other things you hold down it does all what it used to do but the I don't know a lot of people didn't even know about but when you're on the keyboard and you just like hold your thumb down you used to be able to use it as like a mouse like a cursor so if you're trying to you know be excused with the spacebar you can still do it not hold the spacebar down okay normally the spacebar people don't know explain that because it's pretty dope this base bar when you hold the spacebar down you can move that cursor around anywhere you want yeah so really nice yeah when you're typing or anything like that it's like having a mouse and a good thing yeah I thanks man that was one I was so bummed about that I'm like I was like like they were I was that was what really pissing me off well day two a lot of things that you don't know what they do like a lot of people don't know how to make a screen shot or have it do squeeze screen record there's like a lot of things that people don't know how to do yeah that it's like I mean it's a really complicated device and most
people will use like three tenths of what it's capable of but there's so much better than Android phones right now I mean maybe I'm wrong maybe Huawei has a better keyboard but the Samsung keyboard in comparison to Apple there's no competition there's so much there there's so less accurate and they their prediction like prediction of like what you're gonna say next is so bad it just doesn't work good the notes camera was very good I that's where new attends I like the camera I like the focus video you could do you pretty much do the portrait mode but in video mode which you can't do on the iPhones yeah that's better that's one thing that the note does better that pen I never use that thing yeah me neither it's cute I like having it around I like showing people look you could take a picture with it you press the button it works like a remote control never use it once yeah see this is a big new essential phone that got leaked yesterday now I like this I think I've talked about this before how I wouldn't mind a thinner skin or longer phone sitting there just leaked so they don't slip walked remote control yes that's the phone it's a central phone – can you show the video of it because there's a video of it that's really cool when he's like scrolling through the he's scrolling through the operating system one other videos it's a new Android operating system they have put on the phone I don't know if it's gonna have like things removed from it so is it their own thing I think it's a proprietary for them uh-huh is that a camera yeah that's a huge [ __ ] camera that's gonna be like one of the best cameras ever if well it's a really small phone so like if that iPhone camera was on something so thin that would look huge – and that's a it's a very thin thing it's like not even its it seems like it's almost half the size width wise of your iPhone why would you want that I don't get that different just everyone I mean I tell options are good hand cramping and you like how wide the phone is like I'm constantly like trying to lean over that's so good I've are an Apple TV remote sighs it looks like yeah exactly what it looks like I like that do you I really do well
I'll tell you what though who had was a dan Aykroyd who had the old iPhone in here Oh commander flavor David flavor had an iPhone 4 when them little the with us the flat sides metal yeah the metal sides it's so small like he was showing me pictures on I was like squinting to see the picture there's so little but it's so tiny just like fits in your hand yeah that's what I like because that my hands sore it hurts like I bet it's at night like it's it feels like I've been typing all day you know we're stretching it out it's really that big of a deal my Mac is way smaller than yours though yeah but if you if you just got a smaller iPhone just get the small one I could barely reach over yeah it's it's pretty big but when you're watching youtube videos it's the [ __ ] I'll tell you what that is one thing that yeah I have a hard time getting all the way over there – okay so that max right the big one yeah yes my girlfriend is the other one I have that yeah it's smaller I like that better my girlfriend has that size and it might be the move cuz it used to be a bigger deal like there was like a camera stabilization for going to the small – the bigger one we have any pop sockets here we have the jerry pop sockets give me one Nikki Glaser stolen did she well I I gave it to her I thought there were more of them but that's not stealing I know I know I was sorry Nikki took it with some weed oh we gave her about five pounds of weed I hope she didn't try to fly back with that magic she got arrested special right yes it's all right now hilarious – that's my letter take that lady's [ __ ] funny she's great she's very funny but pop sockets my point was if you have a pop socket you just that's way easier you could text like a [ __ ] or the pop socket just slide that [ __ ] right in there like that pop up my new favorite thing Joe is Apple watch now allows you to record voice memos on your watch so when you're doing stand-up it's right there so it's a perfect recording because it's right next to your mouth one thing though is to turn your phone on airplane mode before you do it if you because then it sometimes switches to the phone mic but what so what I do is I put them both on airplane mode so then I have audience
and then voice right next to it so if I wanted to mix it I would have almost a perfect sounding stage recording so it's two separate recordings yeah same show yeah so you keep your phone on your on the stool you're recording the audience and then you have your voice right next you have to sync them up yeah you just whatever groans okay wow that actually sounds badass yeah that actually makes sense like a real reason to have an iPhone watch yeah I like it also you could monitor your sleep now you wear it or I guess it's coming soon but you could wear it and tell us how many times you wake up and it tells your heart rates and stuff I already have that with this thing I have this whoop strap this thing is amazing this this thing it doesn't just measure that and measures heart rate variability it measures all the disturbances how much REM sleep you had our deep your sleep was it also met it measures because of heart rate variability it measures how much you've recovered from your workout measures how many calories you burned I mean the application that comes with it this whoop application is [ __ ] incredible it's got I mean it takes a long time to learn all the [ __ ] but there's so much data that you get off of these things and they gives you like these little things to fill out little questionnaires that let you know it here my every today's only 16% but I just got done running though so it's not a watch at all it's just it's just this right like that doesn't tell you the time at all there's no no readout on it nothing you just keep it on you oh that's badass because that looks cool – yeah and it measures all your [ __ ] it measures your recovery your strain it's got a sleep coach and so here with sober October we're all wearing them so we all get to see that's why I have today Burt burnt the most well how was he number one when he burnt 1,700 calories and I burped 1000 is an automatic order because no no it says 12-point his day strain is twelve point two months twelve point one even though my activity was harder than his oh look at this it's on the internet they have a website sober October jacket tracking watch it yeah this I'm a big fan of this strap this thing is really really effective it's pretty [ __ ] amazing maybe Ari's wearing Bert's strap for him
you know felt bad no first time you're talking alright that's just for recovery I put it depends on what you're looking at yeah I mean there's a bunch of different metrics let's leave you can look so you can read your strain your recovery you can read your performance like how much how many calories you're burning how much how much you've recovered how efficient your body is it just lets you know where you stand physically it also lets you know whether or not you should push it or whether or not you should slack off I look worse look look at all that [ __ ] man it's incredible we're sleep Bert oh of course he's haunted by re re the memories of already drugging him keeping him awake at night I was gonna say on the new on the iPhone something I didn't notice that you were getting close to was that they added in the health app your headphone audio levels so it tracks how loud you're listening to stuff over time and it tells you when you're in a good or bad audio listening range like if you're listening to [ __ ] too loud you're starting to damage your hearing whoa so this then gets into the Apple watch they if you turn it on on your watch it listens to the ambient sound so if you're in an environment like in a city where it's too loud it adds that into your your audio health it gives you warnings also is one thing I've been doing lately the Comedy Store when you know the backbackback place where you smoke the weed you can download a audio meter that tells you how loud it is and so I've been down I download that a long time ago it is so bad back there when there's a lot of people back there that it's like emergency get out of that area it's bad for your eyes or ears it's like a bar yeah I know but it's way high tired well yeah you got a bunch of comics back there echoes off there oh that's true too right the concrete everything I would say though allowing them to listen to all these microphones you're just giving them access to listen to you everywhere and what do they listen to [ __ ] there's an article that went around these recently about this stuff called like a mesh network that's created with some of these like cameras on people's doors there's like a test that happened in the LA basin 700 cameras gave them
access to almost the entire LA area whoa because the way that they linked to each other and there's like some like watchdog people are saying that like even if you're smart enough to like not do this the person next to you might not be or your neighbor might not be they might have it on and just because your proximity is close enough your iPhone knows that your iPhones next to it and it just goes oh yeah you were here Joe was there yeah you can't it's gonna be really hard to pull [ __ ] off in the future and it seems like with all these nest phones and ring phones and our you know not ring phones ring cameras and net cameras nest cameras and people have on the front doors after a while it's everywhere you go you're gonna be filmed they passed the law I think today that that California like body cameras that cops use can't be used for facial recognition like the ACLU got a law passed through that said like that won't be able to happen or something like that hmm too bad but we're caught a lot more people that seems that seems weird because that seems like when you would want to use it when you're a cop looking for bad guys it's like yeah but I think what's happening right now that I've been reading is like there's third-party companies are getting access to that stuff and like they can buy it and that's where some of the discrepancy because it's just happening too fast there aren't laws in place to stop some of these things from happening I just think it's just a good there's lots of great that can people can maneuver in it seems to be not people just a matter of time before you have surveillance everywhere everywhere you go everywhere everything is available to everyone except inside your house like people gonna tinfoil up the inside of their bedrooms just to try to keep people out and then you have the [ __ ] television that probably has a webcam on it you know people they do watch they'd listen to the some TVs have that stuff on to listen to what's going on in your house and what your dick cross-references audios let's say serious all of that is yeah they're listening to everything I mean even contractors who work for Alexa in Apple pods and all that [ __ ] with or I think apples one of the ones did is is that Apple as well because apples pretty damn
strict on privacy which is kind of interesting it's one of the reasons why Apple Maps is not very good yeah because they don't collect data on everybody the way Google does like the benefit of the Google map color of the Google data collection is you get like really detailed analytics on everything and so they know exactly what's going on so why something like Waze work so well because there's so many different people giving up information you know that's mean it shows you where the slowdowns are and where the cops are and you know it's it's there's benefits to it it's super effective but the drawbacks are you're going down this weird road where these companies are selling your information that's what what Google is is a company that provides you data they provide you information but they're also selling your data they're constantly selling what you're interested in like if you ever went and like say like you're interested in a watch like I want to get a new watch you look at watches every [ __ ] time you go to any website now those Google ads will be a watch yeah it's weird it's like they're they're they're just tempting you like come on Jamie I was listening to a podcast about the beginning of the his the history of the Internet it's called like mint cast this was a couple months ago but he was talking about how like when ARPANET was starting up in the 60s there were a lot of protests about just even turning it on because people were knew that it was gonna be a surveillance system like sort of like what is happening now really yeah even back then and and the ability it doesn't work if people aren't using it kinda like it needs to spread and get it grow and then personal computing is sort of like tied in and came along the perfect time for this whoo to like grow more and iPhones or even the next the next evolution of it now but doesn't it make life better I mean there's pros and cons right and the cons were all terrified of but isn't it amazing that you could just Google things yeah like you know like I I said something the other day that I thought was a line in the movie I was like it's not a line in a movie and my wife is just googling it and just like nope nope nope no like what how crazy is that you
just find out like in a movie like how many goddamn movies are there you just type in something in quotes and it'll say oh that was from The Shining and then BAM the lyrics for every song or on it every song every song it's just the the prose I think at least right now outweigh the cons it's just we all wonder where it's going that's what's scary what's scary is the unknown you know scary is this unknown surveillance state aspect of it all you know it's just it's better though it's like there are benefits I've bought some of the ads I've got [ __ ] for great well john carmack had an interesting take on that you know you know who's Carmack is the guy who created quake and doom and all those games and he was talking about oculus and we were talking about technology and people being addicted their phones he's like yes but it makes your life better he's like his take on it was but people's lives are improved because of this technology and that this is you know the guest people do get addicted to be on the screens but one of the reasons why is because it's it seems better to them than not being on the screens like there's benefits it's making their life more enjoyable I'm like okay but you're I see how you're looking at it that way but that's you know convenient when you're in technology to look at it that way but the people that look at it like in terms of like human beings and our connection with each other like how much of is how much of it is getting eroded because so much I mean how much how many times do you and I and once we see each other at the store how many times we talk on the phone like I called you up the other day like hey what's up I don't like the first phone call of 2019 I called Santino yesterday I'm like I just want to talk on the phone Mac we gotta talk on the phone yeah I think it's good to talk on the phone I don't think people talk on the phone enough I definitely don't well we're lucky to and that our job we go out at night and we see each other we all see our friends you know we talk like there's a lot of folks who don't do that they see each other at work during the day and then at nighttime they're sitting at home watching TV or staring at their phone and their interaction is severely and limited like our business
is a social business like we're always out you know we're always out and about talking to people and interacting with people but I think some folks today because of this technology they're socially a bit stunted and that's what I worry about yeah I see it a hundred percent I mean that's it's weird that how it's you know when texting came out every was like who's texting and that's kind of taken over from more people like I know a lot of people that don't answer the phone eating yeah and email addresses I think that's kind of on the way out who emails anymore unless it's like work or something like that like I mostly text or I mostly message each other I saw some girl complaining about people facetiming her and she was like you she was like you FaceTime me for no reason and she owes that's like just knocking on my door without telling me you're coming over don't just FaceTime me she was angry Oh FaceTime and meeting people face time people now though that's a thing like Chappelle's facetiming really a face times that's a new talking with the phone open on speakerphone yeah well the killer Mike FaceTime FaceTime me I was taking a [ __ ] since Tina was live on his Instagram and I was I popped in and he tried to make me like oh yeah I just woke up and I was very hard and it was dark I was like no I'm not joining your [ __ ] my eyes aren't even open like I can't don't be scared Jamie look like scared you looks your wonderful looking man yeah ugly people be happy to look like you well thank you yeah I think you and Joey and my parents are the only ones I answer phones I start calling people every day now I call a lot of people I always call my wife I text her but I'm trying to call more people I think it's I need to move that's a healthy move just you get a real conversation a little back and forth a little laughter you know joke around with each other texting is just so [ __ ] impersonal it's so bland open to interpretation yeah you know teaches the voice memo thing that the text message is allows you know you know who does that man Alex Jones he'll send me these long Joe Rogan would that what's going on right now the deep state with they're trying to do a trump send me these long [ __ ] voicemail messages that come in a text
message a voice memo go away – yeah people are into those though those little voice memos I don't know why hit the other voice I guess no no but yeah that's true but my voicemails always full so that's the sneaky workaround I keep my voicemail full like get out of here with that thing yes no spoiler alert but screening phone calls over answering machines popped up in that movie and that was like a thing that I kind of forgot oh yeah just be able to do like yeah yeah yeah he would let it go – hey what's up Joe not here right now leave a message you'd probably say something cool tries to either have some cool music like some Whitesnake playing in the background I get so many scam calls everyday now that I spend most of my time just going through my missed call list and then googling the phone number to see if it's a scam a scam call or not is there a way to block that isn't there a robo call blocker new iphone thing lets you block numbers that you don't have saved so that goes straight to voicemail yeah that's key because you know if you don't have it saved then you'll just check the voicemail later or see that they called yeah I don't check any voicemails all my shits off they're like I have it on like silent mode do not disturb everything so it might I have to just make sure I check it every like 15 minutes or so well for me I'm glad I got the note because I wanted to know what the dark side was like I was like you know because I watched a lot of tech videos on phones and stuff like that and I was like well maybe an Android has caught up maybe it is better and it's not still clunky [ __ ] Cuba it's good for watching YouTube it's good for Google and stuff it's good for Google Maps it's really good for Google Maps like Google Maps on Android is its native you know to Android so it's it's actually slightly better than it is for iPhone but that's it they kind of have like when you connect it to your car there's like an Android thing Android auto yeah yeah it's okay but like a lot of car manufacturers don't even [ __ ] with it like BMW doesn't even [ __ ] with it they do use apple carplay and if you have an Android you can go [ __ ] yourself they don't care my Honda has both which I thought was cool so you could it has
the Apple Play and the Android Play yeah a lot of the aftermarket ones have both I've never tried Android auto that's one bad thing about Tesla though huh yeah I mean he needs to do something because there's no messaging app on the Tesla but I think that's better that way you don't [ __ ] with it while you're driving yeah it's nice just to be at least like hey you got a text message you know or any shouldn't have anything I guess I don't know man I I just I think it's something there's something good about not [ __ ] with that at all while you're driving you know if you can look at your phone if you want to it's still there yeah but that big-ass beautiful screen it's worth it I like it though when you know in the Honda you just hit a button and just read your text stick mmm oh yeah like Auto yeah yeah yeah apple carplay yeah yeah that does that I have that on my Toyota but see the thing about Tesla is though their navigation system is so superior like what I love about it is it works like a phone because it's all connected to the Internet so you could say to it hey you know navigate to Tom's barbecue and and they'll just bang and they'll just take you to Tom's barbecue and it says like would you like to go on autopilot like [ __ ] yeah would you press Auto Pot would you like us to change lanes [ __ ] yeah change lanes [ __ ] he'll change lanes for you I mean it's it's so superior in like its application like the way the way it first of all the screen is enormous right so you're looking at the entire grid of the city basically and you see where you're going a mile away it's not like sometimes you're looking at like a little screen on a phone and you're like what is this next or is it the next is this one of the next one with the Tesla there's no confusion you know and you get on the front screen on your dashboard yeah you see a part of like what's coming up next is zoom it's the closest part like oh there's the left right there dude it's so good it's so good and then driving it other cars feel stupid don't they yeah I tried to drive my Civic the other day and it sucks like this used to be the coolest car to drive like fun and no now it just seems so dumb they're dumb yeah they're dumb he's got me I like yeah I am I am tested for life because of this I don't know enough
about all these analysts that are predicting the Tesla's gonna be doomed like some guys said the Tesla's gonna lose 80% of its stock or go away like some financial analyst like what they've been saying that forever what are they basing that on I've read that stuff too I they have competitors that don't want them to do good it could be I don't know they're doing very good they're talking about it like the new Porsche Levin if you saw that oh yeah they're joke but guess what try to charge it try to go try to go like across the country with that thing they don't have the supercharger network that Tesla has and that's everywhere why wouldn't they have the same interface okay the Tesla doesn't know that you have a Tesla right it just knows it's electric and it goes into the socket charging point all right thing right yeah I think I think that's a the one at the airport is just electric yeah you're using one of the airplane it's gonna put on the little adapter but who cares when you're going to the airport you leave your car parked and you plug it in you come back it's fully charged there's one in the middle in the middle LAX oh yeah oh yeah oh yeah it's hard to get them sometimes because a lot of people have electric cars now but I got one the other day oh so everyone got mad that you have to pick up your taxis and ubers now like in a satellite slot or take off hey that's all over there well they need that for the goddamn Comedy Store those dorks always park right in front of the driveway you can't get in or out it's a nightmare yeah it's how they get mad at you like you're not supposed to be here stupid yeah it's out of control that's all but look at least less people are drunk driving it the congestion I to fix anything there is a great idea so I don't know like we complain about them doing anything least I'm trying it's the less less traffic definitely ok it just sucks you mean Elya yes the worst it's horrible I came home from Italy with my family at 11 o'clock at night it was bumper-to-bumper worse at night it was so bad I couldn't believe how many people were at LAX it's so bad and then you go to like Salt Lake City and it's just smooth sailing ah you know you go to a night a smaller town Airport Salt
Lake City's a goddamn hidden gem kids five o'clock at night 5 o'clock p.m. Tuesday night nobody's on the road it's just smooth sailing they don't have traffic their traffic is non-existent the Mormons scare everyone away like it's beautiful the weather's gorgeous they're surrounded by mountains but Evers like ah these Mormons and they get scared off and they don't move there yeah I think so it looks great I mean the only bad things the snow right what no my lips you just did you get a four-wheel drive just get a truck you know and [ __ ] you know stay home when it snows with Tesla releases their truck I'm coming out soon I sent Elon a picture of a truck and I said hey man this looks [ __ ] dope he's like that's not really our truck mmm yeah he said it was his words it it's more blade runner-esque that's what he said it's more than that not sure yeah that the picture that I think you're talking about the black one that's already pretty running but that I could tell us fake yeah if he's gonna make a truck he has to have more of a bed space in the back right I think he's trying to make something yeah that's fake that's like that looks [ __ ] dope man it looks pretty Tron – I like the lights oh my god that looks amazing but I think whatever he's doing is gonna look even doper than that but no one is saying it it's somehow or another been able to keep it under wraps yeah that's good how many people have trucks you know in the United States that's gonna be a game-changer I'm surprised that he hasn't released it yet because it's American yeah that's an American product I mean all these people that wanna like it's a weird thing like people argue oh Lord [ __ ] engines and Ford and sure you know like they think that's American we'll guess what else is American Tesla that's an American invention it's American like and it's good for the environment you love the outdoors yes you do good get a [ __ ] electric car drive around on that yeah it's the best part it's uh he's gonna be interesting to see what it looks like have you got solar at your house yet you ever try to [ __ ] with the Tesla solar we were going to get the Tesla roof panels but our roof has the wrong pitch for whatever
that means out direction yeah so we have another set up another solar panel Hass yeah but the I think solar is in California it's a silly thing to not have it's like you can get all your power from the sky it should be the law every house has to have it well I think it's a matter tell like Tesla has these solar panels that act as tiles he looks like roof tiles and look really good those are real nice roof tiles but I think you know they didn't have that ten years ago and ten years from now they probably have something even more efficient the real problem is battery capacity like battery capacity is the thing that holds back these electric cars and they think they're gonna be able to fix that too and they think with new battery technology you're going to be able to get more mileage and to be able to charge far quicker that's gonna be the real game-changer cuz once people there's a lot of people that like Brendan Brendan Schaub he's like resisting the Tesla driving rise like you driving that again he gets mad because like why are you traveling your muscle cars I'm like I love those but I love this you got to drive this mad like I'm not driving it's quiet it doesn't matter when you drive it once you're like holy [ __ ] when you realize how fast they are it's like it time travels it just goes just just it just cuts the distance between spaces in a way that no other car can do I don't I've never seen another car that and and it does that without being obnoxious like it doesn't go bad it doesn't make some crazy loud noise it just goes whoosh Elon should definitely have an update where it makes your car speakers match with your your acceleration like it's so you feel like you're inside like a rumbling car while you're driving down they do how they have that with some cars which people get mad at it apparently the new Corvette pipes fake sound into your into the car because when when they make cars that are turbocharged when you have forced induction with turbocharged these these turbos they make the engine sound shitty like a naturally aspirated engine as the loudest most rumbly kind of an engine and when you have turbo charges it mutes the sound of the engine because although I don't know why I guess it's because of
all the forced air they they don't sound as good so what they've been doing is they've been forcing like fake sound like BMW does that like when you're driving the car and you hear the cool acceleration sound it's kind of fake it's coming in through your speakers yeah this is really weird they're about to release a fart Warren also that test yeah I've heard about that that's a great idea I saw this video today and you started mentioning something that triggered it did you see have you seen this yet says solar a game-changer for technology developed in San Antonio to pull water from humid air so this guy Moses West he was retired and it took him four years he developed this machine called a AWG I'm trying to find out what that stands for but it's a big machine that pulled literally makes drinking water from the air at very low cost he said lower the cost in ground water Hey well he already has them in Puerto Rico the Bahamas and Flint I think he's made 12 of them so far I've talked about this with my dad before because I have a humidifier and it does the same thing I have to empty out the water container out of it every a dehumidifier I'm sorry right and it has this big tank that when I use it I have to like throw it out and I was like that just pulls from the air and I was like dad why can't you drink it and he's he says it's too uh it's still water so you can't you know you can't drink still water right like it's not you know what like pond water kind of [ __ ] no like that little water it's not still water the water you can buy distilled distilled water right yeah it's not good for you got to add electrolytes to it the science behind the technology is a simple condensation the same principle that creates beads of water on the outside of a cold glass of water on a hot humid day the warmer and more humid the air outside the better the his machine is able to condense the water in the air making it rain inside the shipping container size device a spigot and a hose allow people to fill up any container with fresh potable water it's like an endless source of water it's a water generator that's really cool for play that are human I wonder if that would work in LA though cuz it's dry as [ __ ] here right do they have any water in the
air here they must have some yeah yeah and I was I'd looked on the other day I was sixty-two percent you made of the outside I was like this is Oh that's Ohio levels like it's crazy right now there's just the other down I was must have been cloudy day so on a regular day but is it ever zero percent humidity it's not no it's let it's lower but it's still not like I always thought it was zero but it's not always well if what he's saying makes sense right like you've always been able to take a glass with ice and a drink and you get condensation on the outside of it always right so all you would have to do is I mean if that works on a hot day in LA they could get water out of the air that's amazing yeah he's just it's this is new as far as I know it's probably not a brand new technology he just figured out a variable but god I'd love some more people yeah oh so glad they're real I'm so glad they're out there fixing things I'm I'm really hoping and I've talked to many technologists that believe this as well that technology is going to be the solution for our our environmental problems that they're gonna be able to pull carbon out of the air is this it right now that's the machine that's him he was next here cuts Tim's like filling it up what is this gentleman's name Moses West most powerful Moses West figured it out and he's get that's like a truck container like it looks like the look at that in there yeah that's crazy it looks like one of those things in the caboose on a train what's a caboose no cab which ones which ones the cargo holder what are those it's like the front the engine right yeah what's all those ones in the back where those called the locomotives different right look at all that water they're getting out of the [ __ ] air Texas man plans to take water machine to the Bahamas do that the Bahamas is really depressing have you paid attention to the devastation in the Bahamas from the hurricane yeah yeah you know Eve Edwards is from the Bahamas so he went down there and he's he's helping out and I looked at some of the the video footage of the devastation down there the Bahamas essentially got wiped out I mean they got crushed that hurricane at the airport was disappeared just gone yeah pull up some footage you're bidding but how much no
I've never been yeah what's it like very Beach like it was the only place where everyone was trying to give sell you drugs everywhere it's like like I was at Pizza Hut like I guys here's your pizza and like I want that pizza for some reason I don't know why because I was like hi what American poor cheap pizza and the guy here's your pizza how do you wanna buy any coke like my pizza I figured if you're the type of guy who gets pizza in the Bahamas right in the type of guy who does coke look at what it looks like man [ __ ] look at that one on the right the far right the big shark go large with that look at that man that's insane it essentially wiped out the island see when when you're in the path of hurricanes on a regular basis like that and you're stuck there that's gotta be such a helpless feeling you know the destructions coming basically every year well it did it it wasn't this bad like ten years ago right like all these people probably were like yeah we had a hurricane once 20 years ago but now it seems like they're just getting [ __ ] every year well part of it is because of climate change the Atlantic Ocean the Atlantic Ocean is a warm ocean right that's why we don't get hurricanes out here in the Pacific cuz cuz the waters cold the pros and the cons the pros are it we don't get hurricanes the cons are it's cold to swim in but to me I'll take that all day I don't swim in the ocean that much hurricanes seem to come every [ __ ] year sigh benefit test is that they could drive underwater shows videos of Tesla's like well not submerged but like yeah crazy really airtight Tesla's are airtight because the they have the nuclear bomb mode for the air conditioning you know I'm talking about the radiation mode nuclear bomb mode so they have the filtration system and at least in the ex I think it's in the s2 has the it's so airtight that like if if the airs quality is bad or whatever you can do that and forget the name of it it's not called a nuclear bomb but it's the nuclear symbol all out mo yeah and it makes it so no air it's only filtering the air that's inside the cabin and it's Heights are they like if there's bad gas outside how long would it take before you run out of oxygen though I don't
know right because like Goods only so much air in there if we just breathe in air and blowing out carbon dioxide wouldn't eventually fill up or maybe it's it's filtering the air and because of that filters can it's like wearing a gas mask like it's filtering new air into it yeah what does it call it yeah does that really work like that yeah I think so I remember I was watching an episode of Top Gear and they were saying that the air that comes out of a Porsche 911 Turbo is actually cleaner than the air it sucks in in downtown LA so if you drive around a 911 Turbo in LA the exhaust fumes are actually cleaner than the air pulls in bio weapon defense mode is what you on must cause it by weapon defense mode it's the advanced air filter systems to the point that automaker has been making credible claims at how hmm now how does it does it filter out carbon monoxide like Aniki give you a continuous supply of oxygen while the battery's charged when those fires were going on remember they were like ice-t permit I remember he was tweeting something about like they were like being views as escape vehicles to get people out because they had such good HEPA filters on them yeah Oh hmm that makes sense yeah haven't been in those fires myself it's stunning how weird it gets when you're seeing like fire everywhere and then the air is just everywhere you go it's just filled with smoke the worst I ever saw was one year we were filming fear factor in the entire ride home for more than a more than 50 miles the whole right side of the highway was on fire there's more water than that but there's a lot of water oh and it was so funny he makes a wave that attacks this reporter look he's like that's a weird feature because you remember those Karma's those fisca Karma's they blew up at the dock because the dock got overrun with water and they all started exploding yeah that's [ __ ] up yeah they didn't figure that out it's gonna be interesting to see who steps into the electric car world like now that Porsche has got this really sweet looking new car that's coming out but apparently doesn't have as many miles doesn't go as many miles as a Tesla all right and it's not as fast as a test right there's yeah but that's weird like your Porsche like
why don't you have a faster car than Tesla like how did they do that like why would they release a car that's not as fast I think they all can agree that Elon 10 years in the past all the car makers right now though he's 10 years ahead ahead yeah yeah yeah yeah well makes sense I think apples gonna have something pretty cool bringing because once you know if Apple really does finally release their electric car you know that's going to be the iPhone of cars yeah I really do I think you won't even said that they are I have known I thought they'd lie someone maybe you're like put their name on something but for them to get in a car but it seems pretty tough for Tesla to do it to make their own cars no I think I think they're teaming up with like Knox Wagoner and it's gonna be like an Apple car or something like that seems like an insane waste of time let's just go buy a Tesla Apple has so much money though it's amazing that how much my yeah they definitely could it's amazing how much money that company is just stored up they could they could buy Tesla and just turn them into apples easily be great if Elon wanted to sell I don't think he wants to sell I think he wants to prove everybody wrong you know when everybody says that the company's gonna go out of business it's gonna lose 80% of its market share and I think he wants he's the but I don't know how he does everything that's what doesn't make any sense to me like how does he do that and pay attention to the tunnels that are digging under LA and pay attention to SpaceX and pay attention to Solar City I mean how how the [ __ ] one guy have so many different irons in the fire a lot of assistance I bet I'm sure but how does he rest like how do you rest when you have that many different things going on that [ __ ] ain't good like when the most busy you've ever been how many podcast were you doing there was a point where with yours and death squad I was probably doing like 11 a week oh oh it was pretty much only doing podcast they've ruined all my relationships damn yeah see that is just not wise right that's just too much it's too much to do when people do that when they just take on too many different I've thought about other stuff like doing other stuff
I've had offers to do other stuff and I start thinking about it maybe I could find time for that and then I then I give myself coaching like I'm like what would you tell yourself I'm like what the [ __ ] is wrong with you you're not doing anything else like you barely do all the stuff you're doing now I think for me too as I get older especially like right now in my life my leisure time is very important to me like it means something and I don't mean leisure like sit around doing nothing but like hobbies like stuff that I do like lately I've been shooting guns you have a jealous man dude you should come with us I'm thinking about buying a gun did you get a gun you want to come with us tomorrow um wait a minute what's today I might be going tomorrow we'll talk afterwards yeah but I'm going soon no but you should come it's fun it's fun you learn how to shoot your gun in tactical yeah it is fun you know it's like video game but some people get mad a lot of mad comments why just get mad they don't want you shooting guns stop it stop it think of their children Popat blanks well we're not shooting blanks no she's real bullets laws but it's um there's also a game that you can get we're gonna get for this studio that's it's a real pistol like it looks like a real pistol and has a six pound pole so it feels like a real pistol when you pull the trigger and it's like that technol hunt thing well you got a laser beam that shoots out and it even makes a noise like a gun like pow pow bang and you're shooting zombies no way yeah and it's heavy like a pistol so you have to hold it like a pistol don't ya dude that's bad that's nice core and when I oh oh yeah tells you how many civilians you shoot how many zombies you got cuz sometimes people come running around the corner and it says it's a zombie and then there's a civilian behind him you got to make sure not to stir you guys rolling around and [ __ ] out there or you just stand still in that we're not nobody that's fun you guys are having yeah no obstacles I don't think it's a good idea to have dummies like me roll around with a gun in my hand thank you somebody told me to buy a Glock 19 that was the gun about great gun cool yeah you should before you do anything
you should learn how to shoot high five shot before I've done a few times with you yeah yeah for rifles right yeah yeah oh yeah but I've shot in Burbank at the shooting place with all the place near ya dentistry yeah yeah it's fun man it's fun we should have a JRE shooting range somewhere hell yeah have a gentleman before to that thing that yeah we shot all the hard drives yes that was fun that was fun wasn't it it was rifle shooting is fun but pistol shooting well you're holding in your hands it's way more difficult it seems is it more difficult more difficult to aim yeah because he gave me a rifle and you know I shoot rifle so much or I have shot him so much it's easy you just have trigger discipline you just don't yank the triggers pull pull pull pull pull bang and let it go off like a surprise shot and I was hit everything I aimed at and he was like okay you've shot that before but like pistols I've only shot pistols at a range with no instruction I don't really I didn't know what I'm doing at all and once you learn like how to grip it how to hold it how to aim like you don't really hold that hard with your right hand most of the pressure with your left so and the grip is very it's not intuitive you have to learn it it's something that you have to be taught correctly and there's so many people there that are like they they shoot in competitions and so when you watch them do it you're like oh wow Jesus Christ like there's levels to this these guys they can pull their gun out and shoot four shots inside of a second man everything in a second pull draw pull shoot four shots inside of a second that's crazy yeah it's ridiculous but they're just begging for someone to break in the house yeah there's people like that out there there's people I thought were you you know you break in the house you [ __ ] with the wrong person well tent city's growing so I think I need to get one la is gonna be a giant homeless encampment it's like if you looked at the spread right if it was a disease a deadly disease that was killing everybody and you saw a patient zero and then it spread like two people four people six people ten people now la has more
than 60,000 homeless people and every single underpass that you go to you see camps now yeah it's not like it used to be it's a it's a totally different animal now it's like a walking dead man where it's it seems like it's growing like Laurel Canyon when you're going to Laurel Canyon off the 101 it used to be pretty normal last night are 2 nights ago when I went through it it was like you there was no sidewalk anymore it was like if somebody won it had to walk on that sidewalk yeah good luck with your going through a walk village you know yep and needles and all kinds of [ __ ] up inhuman [ __ ] I mean human shits all over downtown LA people [ __ ] and that's nothing compared to San Francisco that guy's ubi who's on our podcast he did a bunch of posts about his trip to San Francisco is like it is so much worse he was saying it was so much worse than he thought it was it's so it's so beyond comprehension how many people are just openly shooting up drugs [ __ ] in the streets homeless people everywhere how do you fix that and like if you think that if there's something that la needed to fix how do all the things that LA complains about the homeless problem it's like one of the most insurmountable problems like what do you do to curb that how do you get these people homes how do you clean these people up how do you get them off drugs how do you get them off the streets how do you make it not a public nuisance how do you make it so people aren't scared to go down streets those are certain streets in downtown LA where you see the street like you're at the beginning of the mouth the street and you look into a street like I'm not walking down there like this is terrible so they need to open up the mental hospitals again whenever they closed them down wait in the 70s or the 80s that's what caused all this they don't have those anymore it definitely was a problem but it seems like it's gotten way worse right like think about what it used to be ten years ago now think about what it is now I mean this ten years ago it was still decades after they closed down the mental institutions they changed the standards so what it was was they had certain standards where you would be institutionalized and they changed those standards under the Reagan
administration just sent these people out into the streets and everybody thought it was like really cruel because he reads releasing these people with always like severe mental health problems he's releasing the mountain to the street but that was a long time ago something has happened recently I guess is the economy I mean I don't know what it is but another thing you're thinking seeing around this area is mobile homes like those the drive those campers like Winnebagos [ __ ] everywhere people just get enough money to get one of them mobile homes they just Park it on the street and they live in those things which is just like a mobile camp you know and you get these gypsies that hang out and they cook on the sidewalk and [ __ ] like we used to have him here they would they would like they were hanging out and sunbathing on the lawn out here and the owner of the building is like get the [ __ ] out of here like what are you guys doing this isn't a park like go to the park you know it's worse sovereign citizens what is that there's people that don't drive they travel and they don't follow the rules and they like if you watch it live PD they have won every episode – every episode its they'll get pulled over and it's like they won't even roll down the window and they're like I don't have to follow your rules sir I am you know they never have driver's license or insurance they it's like people that don't think taxes apply to them but they don't think the law applies that's gromp grown so big recently that it's so many people now that do this [ __ ] and it's the most grossest like if you watch on my PDA you'll you'll it is live PD YP these cops nowadays it's but it's a new show I think it's way better by the way but because it's live it's like four hours long and the hosts live yeah live in the moment yeah they're like in seven different cities they have a whole control center like all right we got a speeding going on here we got it up there's a chase going on here let's go live over here yeah it's my favorite and they also have in Columbus Ohio where they used to but it's got rid of it yeah I didn't even know this was a thing and so these sovereign citizens like what are they saying that you pulled over and they say I don't have to listen to you
yeah they pretty much say like your rules don't apply they'll be like get you know give me your driver's side I need your I'm ready quick take you to jail for just a seatbelt you know violation give me your license they wall like I don't need to give you a license sir please like they have this [ __ ] to keep on repeating like and they all go to these websites and they're like reading it on their phone sir I don't have to you know do this and that in this and then they finally have to like break their window and just drag them out and arrest them just wear a seatbelt finally people are smart and they're talking about though but other people have just like watched another video like ow I don't have to listen to this guy I'm a youtuber there's something uniquely satisfying about watching I get pulled over by the cops and he knows exactly what his rights are and the cops are [ __ ] up and he calls the cops on different codes and laws and the Constitution and then he winds up driving off I've seen that before yeah it's all over the DEA on accident they're like oh yeah or that woman who was a New York she was like some kind of high up person that got pulled over and she starts like yelling out the cops and [ __ ] like she lost her job the next day yeah I saw that yeah yeah that was ridiculous she was trying to throw her weight around yeah she didn't realize she was on camera being a big corruption man that's corruption you're a citizen [ __ ] you know everybody needs to realize there was one where a judge got pulled over they let him slide but he got in trouble afterwards as well because it's on camera you know and then someone finds that video it's like hey man you're our citizen you're like us like if you're speeding or something like that and they pull you over you can't get out act like you own these cops it's I mean you got to give your [ __ ] Drive driver's license up you gotta you got to show them your identification if you're doing something that's an infraction or a violation that's the whole reason why we have cops do you want everybody just driving 150 miles an hour with no ID and masks on No so you have to have rules so these are the rules if you do something that breaks the law they gotta be able to pull you over and give you a [ __ ]
ticket and incentivize you to drive correctly and also find out if maybe you're running from the cops you know so they pull you over to get your ID leo hey man you got a murder warrant out for you so please step out of the car with your hands up I mean this is the whole reason when we have cops in the first place then these people that think they don't have to pay taxes then the laws don't apply to them it's all instant unconstitutional good luck with that case good luck with the ass Wesley Snipes how that worked out yeah it should they put Wesley and [ __ ] in jail for a long time Lauryn Hill too from the goddamn Fugees they put her in a cage for like a year right how long did she go to jail for it was a taxes thing two men they get these wacky whether it's an attorney or a tax professional or some wacky advisor tells them they don't to pay taxes and they read some internet thing it says actually it's unconstitutional it's only supposed to apply during wartime like listen pay your [ __ ] taxes okay you can protest all you want you think it's unjust that's good they will put you in a [ __ ] jail and if you're a famous person is trying to pull that off especially a famous rich person look it's not good but it is what it is they're gonna make an example of you yeah how long did you go to jail for three that's it showing what did you have for three months you tell hmm so she was released from a federal prison woman's low security all facility all female facility just the fact they put her in a [ __ ] cage is crazy like is she a danger to the public like what is going on here she owes you money how come that's the one money that you can't just pay back you know you can't just pay it back how come I can't just pay it back nope not good enough yeah and yet they take away your ability to earn a living for a long time like Wesley Snipes how long was he in jail for he was in jail for like a solid year I whole year behind bars put a halt to his career and all because he owed some taxes cuz he had some wacky dude that was telling him he didn't have to pay taxes how long he had a 3-year sentence three years imagine that man because of money they lock you in a goddamn cage it's not like he stole money I saw he
held up a bank it's not like he was a violent person that was a danger to society no he owed some taxes he made money yeah and they had their taking his yeah he made money but he didn't give his share up to the government so the government decided to lock him in a cage to punish him and to make a statement to everybody else it's saucer-like you pay taxes you get taxed on your paycheck and then you get sales tax they're getting taxed how many times you know getting taxed a lot ten times well then that's why places like Nevada people like because in Nevada you don't have to pay state taxes so you make a you can save a lot of money Florida same thing like I know it dude who moved to Florida because he was gonna sell his business so he's like look I'm gonna move to Florida and establish residence in Florida for a few years and then sell my business so I'm a Florida resident and then after pay nearly as much money can see if you own a big business it can save you a ton of money it's just weird that it's different everywhere you go you know like some places just don't have state tax you don't have to pay yeah Montana has different taxes Colorado is different taxes they're all of everybody's getting like a different set up different amount that you have to pay for this and that override there's a weird thing that like a lot of the big corporations have their headquarters in Delaware for some reason it's like some weird tax law for that mm yeah a nice little tax haven it sound like that well isn't that why the juice moved to Florida didn't oj move to florida because they couldn't take his pension that way where he owes money based off the lawsuit right for the civil suit yeah but he has a pension right from the NFL yeah so takers right they can't [ __ ] with that pension dude I gotta tell you watching him on Twitter hey every day is one of the strangest thing and he I'm talking about football so there's certain things like if you're if you're a guy who went to jail for embezzlement and he got out but you're a football fan and you still talk about football okay you're just talking about football but if you're you're a double homicide guy you killed two people with a knife and then you got away with it
but everybody knows you did it and then you're talking about football hates for the world what is he saying run your studs see football all the time let me hear some of this get go from the beginning well the fifth week is in the can and some things are beginning to reveal themselves one the Dallas Cowboys may not be who we thought they were the Buffalo Bills defense is for real they are great Teddy Bridgewater's more than the seat holder if and when the time that drew brees decided to move on is so strange let's just give an MMA like pecs what if somebody gets out stopping it was great this weekend yeah that would be weird hey yeah well I mean obviously it was a great football player in his day so it kind of makes sense that he's talking about football but it is strange and then if you look in the comments it's all knife emojis and you really cut me up with that one juice his choice of words sometime almost make me feel like that that he's doing some [ __ ] on purpose though like I don't think some psychology look at the coverages it's so strange yeah I mean his it's like you're never getting away from that 700 replies it's never gonna go away right I mean that's who he is at least now he's wearing sunglasses in every pic it's so strange though every video Hey look at his inside yeah he's got a glass those are reading glass he's got his hand but it's all like jovial football talk so strange it's just what a weird time we're at where a guy ism is a murderer and it's on Twitter yeah allegedly he's on Twitter and just talking about football like what do you think he gets out of that like why do you think he thinks that's a good idea does he just miss attention just like I think it has anything going for him he has to do that to promote like book signings I bet he signs a song he's no signings I bet he does that [ __ ] at the mall in Vegas you know what the [ __ ] he does like what does OJ do for money Petros types she just gets that pension right yeah there could might be honest he might be trying to build his Twitter account to a point where he could use it for that how many people million nine hundred sixteen thousand yeah well it's one of those things where it's kind of an oddity right it's like an attraction
he's gonna be boxing screech any day now he's really old and he doesn't move that good but he's got killer instinct I like him on Naked Gun look he's you know before the murders he was a beloved person it's just such a it's such an unusual like society today is so strange across the board you know like look at us we're we're in NASA costumes millions of people are watching like what are we doing let's mount according to this teams are believed to report our teams the article I guess it says that that what he originally owed to the Goldman family due to twenty-two years of interest is over a hundred million dollars now mm-hmm so and they can't make him pay huh well that's like why I guess he can't really work is it just take all that money so any autograph signings he does probably we get they take all the money and go on right away so how does he live he has to have like a certain allowance just had NFL pension war he has a friend who gives him money right no no probably as I like what would he do with his Twitter well the strange thing is like do you think that this is a calculated effort to try to start a social media business or do you think this is just him just trying to connect with people what some someone has to be is here there's no way he just figured out Twitter here's a Bourdon was like what's this Twitter thing I mean he has some big guy man for sure read an article hmm he's got to be the hottest guy on Twitter him and John McAfee that John McAfee guy ran around oh yeah he's like halfway trolling people it's hard to tell what he's doing like what he's doing seems to be like almost like a sum of it's very theatrical remember when we interviewed him when he was on the run we interviewed him remotely when he was on the run for murder and he was saying that it was all nonsense when I was asking him about math like how much math you you really smoking meth like I read an article that showed that you had a meth lab that you built in your backyard he's like I thought that was all fiction yeah it was like that was a prank I was trolling people I believe that you think so yeah I know he's old school
he's an old school I mean it was cooking it I mean he was straight up Breaking Bad in his backyard where was even Belize like where was summer something like that but some place where it all went sideways on him right in his neighbor wind up getting murdered that's why he's on the run right yeah what a character the guy was a [ __ ] antivirus mogul you know I mean deaths McAfee McAfee Antivirus he was the like though it was like Norton and McAfee those are the two big names in antivirus hundred Norton – right you know McAfee sold place and believe smoke is leftover meth [Laughter] those dudes who [ __ ] escape society and go move to some small island and get some little little you know native girlfriends that's a weird move right that's a great move do you think you'd ever see yourself doing that hell yes you could podcast from an island somewhere as soon as that's possible being hologram stuck hologram style anywhere that's when it like like you could have you somebody on as a guest as a podcast but in hologram form well listen if we decided to set up a studio like on an island somewhere and do the podcast from an island somewhere and we'd have to fly some guests in right like say if there's a few of us we just talk [ __ ] about the news all the things that are going down the Trump impeachment this and that we all did it from an island somewhere and occasionally we fly people in you put say if you do it in online I write you got you everybody flies in the four seasons stay in a nice place has to be somewhere where there's no hurricanes less they don't get too many hurricanes I've had to lean on like Jeffrey Epstein pitch to get people on his plane he's still alive anyway so we can just go to his I do you think he's still oh yeah really yeah he said he's on that island how funny is it that people just stop talking about the fact that guy get whacked yeah for sure they whacked that guy I mean out of all the things that I'm sure about that I don't know and this is one that I'm most sure I'm most sure they murdered that guy he knew so much from so many different people and all the things that went wrong even Michael Shermer
who is like a professional skeptic who doesn't believe in anything he found out that the cameras were broken and the the they weren't working on the day the guy got offed he's like oh maybe this is a conspiracy you think you think the guy Clinton flew to his [ __ ] Island 26 times he flew with Epstein why don't he flew into his Island but he flew on Epstein's jet 26 different times they held I'll chopper there for quite a long time and nothing happened to him what at that same facility oh yeah like no one who died there for 26 years or something like that consistent I knew I heard Dave whack that guy the most hilarious thing is you ever see who his cellmate was that no this helmet was a [ __ ] gorilla really like the biggest guy you could ever imagine being in your cell like the guy looked like you're like if you're gonna have a movie about the worst possible cell mate you could ever have it would be this guy look at this guy look at size of the guy so glad he's white and he's a former cop a former cop built like a brick [ __ ] I mean he's enormous what is that guy's name Nicholas Turk toggle yelling yeah he was a bad cop the cop went bad but when you look at the size of him you like come on man that's really his cellmate look like before you went in then a bad dog and that's him now yeah Wow he's [ __ ] huge a huge gigantic muscled up dude was his cellmate and was he there when he got offed no he wasn't there no what a convenient there the first time he wanted it suicide was tell me drives that yeah what aimed him what did this save him he killed four people on a bad coke deal whoopsies I had it come on big do whatever whatever a bad coke deal but how funny is that that that's his cellmate like what do we got what do we got well only got a murderer that's built like a brick [ __ ] and put him in there with him he got some wet cocaine he's transferred out the eve of his suicide okay Vincent and then they had the doctor picture with ghilane mask well at the in and out and Studio City yeah it was just like what would they put that out disappeared right made the news doctored photo shopped for some reason where's that lady no one knows they didn't even know where she was at the time and then she liked that picture came out that thought she
was in Boston or something out about the high-profile cases out of all of them that's got to be the most strange right this guy has an island on the island he has a building that's colored in the the the mate it's painted in the colors of the Israeli flag they think he's a Mossad agent he's some sort of intelligence agent the reporter that said that he was released earlier was given a sweet deal because he was intelligence that's not been verified right right that came from one article the Vanity Fair thing right he's on him that got repeated a lot but I don't know that we don't know if anywhere that's right right jeez it's the whole thing though Jesus Christ what a crazy story this is a strangest time because every day there's new things coming at you so hard and fast you can't keep up with it this was his drone there's someone flying a drone over his Island every day stop three weeks ago I guess but for the like almost every day there was updated drone footage for some reason I don't know how this person was getting it there they must have a boat but yeah he paid someone something like fifty thousand dollars extra to have a cement truck delivered there a couple months before he got arrested like he had a cement truck shipped out to his Island and they think they had some [ __ ] got buried in that tunnel or something I don't know so they've been like that they have footage on this island pre rate and post rate of the FBI making it there yeah there was one like last week or two weeks ago where they supposedly saw him sitting in an thought so it was just like a worker from violence there's gonna be so many stories about this but we're never gonna know it's gonna be one of those things it's like the Kennedy assassination or something we're decades will go by you'll hear all these crazy different stories people write books about it but you'll never really know exactly what happened hey we should get assigned to this island yeah what happens to it how much you think an island cause it's probably gonna be cheap because no one wants to live on how to fail island so this could be the place Joe I don't know if that's really smart it doesn't seem like a good move it seems like the one you want to buy you
want to do like what Roseanne did you get a place on an island that is already populated a bunch of nice people establish self as a valuable member in the community and then you set up a camp there imagine the big island the big island might be the move set up a [ __ ] studio on the Big Island hell yeah what do you think let's do it it's not a bad idea right conservatory can we do it up there where they let us know they want you to let them build a new house code tell us what if we take a tent and a microphone up there no they get mad at you you're littering temporary no all right no you don't want to be up there anyways no air so that's really only 11,000 square feet red Bambi blacking out maybe we need to have something like like near like Kona like where the Four Seasons is see again the Four Seasons bring oxygen I'm four seasons oxygen watch me blend of the four seasons you just we rent a suite at the Four Seasons set it up as a studio yes that's great we have to have an escape oxygen like basement we can go to just in case of a hurricane or something crazy happens an oxygen baby already like like an escape room we should we could Airbnb it out to other podcasters that need the vacation not anyone like your friends like a good friend of yours [ __ ] that they would ruin it yeah maybe farm on our he's gonna go there and fill it without the seal on the water be broken yeah trust me bad idea it's gonna put acid on all the CNRS someone who could go meditate there quietly something like that Sarris goes on those things where you don't talk for 10 days exactly the [ __ ] out of here with all of that he comes back he still seems the same I don't get it these guys they go are these [ __ ] retreats I mean I'm sure there's a benefit I'm sure there's a benefit to silent meditation but you can take it stuff it deep in your ass [ __ ] you I like talking to people man it's not enough time and this wife you don't like to meditate I do meditate for 10 minutes every day 10 10 minutes that's not much how much and I you know I I cancel it out when I do yoga I don't don't meditate on yoga days because I feel like Yoga is basically meditation anyway it's like a strain and meditation all combined I cancel it out on days I get in the tank but other than that it's
beneficial it definitely helps me man I got too much just bouncing around inside my head you know but it's like it's controllable I just need to be I just need to get out ahead of it you know like day today I went for a nice run went went running with the dog and I feel great you know cuz I got it all out of the system just like ah I did what I had to do come here to do a podcast with you everything is wonderful life is beautiful it's all falling into place but when it's not and there's like loose ends that need to be sealed up and I'm behind on this and I don't think good you know it doesn't doesn't if I don't take care of all the things that I'm supposed to take care of I do not enjoy my time that's to me I found that like that's a painful lesson that took forever to learn that if I don't have all my ducks in a row and my t's crossed and my eyes dotted I'm not happy I'm just there's too much just too much things to think about too much anxiety I think that's what's going on with a lot of people I think there's a lot of people out there that just don't have their [ __ ] together and they don't ever just say look before I do anything else I gotta get like Jordan Peterson talks about this he says just clean your room like start with that you can clean your room and most people don't you keep your room mess and then your life's a mess and there there's an analogy there there's a metaphor there whatever other word you would like you know I'm talking about Brian yes so now that you're not Kido what are you doing with your diet trying to be healthy no not really no no but it definitely has made me understand sugar more smoking cigarettes yeah I'm vaping a lot more but yeah how much cigarettes do you smoke a day half pack still yeah but I don't smoke in my car so I my cigarette has gone down like because of that because of that like 70% that's good yeah what would you think if we decided to do that as a project higher you a trainer and how are you – nutritionist would you be down with that sure like film it as a project yeah what would you like what do you weigh now would you you don't have to tell everybody but what would you like to get down to but see that's the problem would night when when I got down whatever like 15 years they are 13 year ago whenever
that when I whatever I think I was like 65 pounds or something and I I just thought I look like I had AIDS or something we're just yourself looking big yeah but I think some people like they have a body shape or look that looks way but way better with a little chub on them than they do if they look I don't know I feel like you know what Joey Diaz said when he lost a lot of weight maybe when he lost a lot oh my [ __ ] head look too big yeah exactly but you know what that is it's like you got to build up your body because something happens to people when they gain weight your head gets bigger it's like when people get really heavy their head gets bigger and I don't know if like a biologist can back us up on this some sort of science but it seems like really overweight people their head gets really big too like it grows with them which kind of makes sense because there's like your bones definitely get bigger and thicker when you lift a lot of weights right now when you're 450 pounds you're carrying weight everywhere you go so everything's got to be thick like I always said if Ralphie may wanna blues and all that weight he'd be able to kick a hole through a [ __ ] wall cuz that guy's carrying around 500 pounds everywhere he goes his leg muscles had to be gigantic like underneath all that his legs must have been [ __ ] huge so if you could just put some muscle on while you're losing the fat see that's the difference like when you were on that look at you look great then dude let me you sexy [ __ ] now look at what you think you look bad no okay that's an OK man I was thinking more about the wide as you look Jamie how great you look you look [ __ ] great there I was think more of that time when the photo of me and you with that weed guy that died at the 4/20 Awards where I just look like an 8 that's when I was at my lowest the one I had although of can't think of his name he has weed named after him he's very famous oh yeah yeah stroke yeah we were hanging out there me and you and I just that's when I was at my skinniest I think I was like 160 155 or something like that I remember but I just look like ass I feel so light though you move around like asses get places quicker yeah Lichter definitely have more energy
that's better dude you can do this what would you think about doing this as a project like we'll announce it on the podcast we'll start it off would you be into doing something like that yeah I mean eventually not like not like this month because I have to go to Australia how this started now I have to Australia you know that yeah when are you going back what you do until Tony out there yeah doing kill Tony and then uh yeah so this month is all I'm on the road okay well I'm in the bit and I'm busy being sober this month too it's very difficult for me it's [ __ ] surprisingly easy you know it's not hard at all I do enjoy a glass of wine with a steak I do miss that I like a glass of wine but it's not that important yeah it's like a tradition thing like I'm missing the the like like something to look forward to a nice nice glass of red wine with a steak like a gentleman I think it's only hard when I'm at the Comedy Store yeah it's impossible I do like a shot of whiskey before I go on stage – I've been like that yeah but I can't look at you it's almost over it's yeah it's half wait and I'm halfway it's the tenth one third one third and ninth yeah one third yeah it's been easy the weed part's easy it's really easy shows have been great had a great time last night I did three shows that I'll tell you one thing though that Jeremiah shows not as easy stand-up on the spot it's not as easy when you're not high that's true when you're high you could just ramble about nonsense you come up with bits I've come up with so many bits from that show but not not when I'm sober last night was basically useless that's the only show that I purposely do shots drink smoke a bunch of weed before I go on you say I don't like to get that stoned before I go on stage no that's the perfect show to be out of your head yeah he really should listen you though and rename it [ __ ] that was the best name when you call the [ __ ] it was the perfect name for that I just need to make any show called [ __ ] it's not like there's the only he's the only one who's ever done a show that has people just making things up and I used to do that at the end of my shows remember and it's P Q and s call out but they would call out things
to talk about and they would yell out subjects I was just and occasionally the reason why would do is occasionally like one every two or three shows I'd come up with an idea that actually would come up and become a bit it just remembered something we're in Dallas last weekend for kill Tony and there was a bisexual on stage and he was talking about he's bisexual and a lot of times when people are on the stage that on the show I'll be like on my computer like typing in bisexual on Spotify or something you know to see what comes up and you come up like number one or number two on Spotify if you just type bisexual it's you and then so I point to Tony while we're interviewing the guy day guys like that I'm like you know what I'm gonna try to just play like I can't skier anything so like I'll just play like cuz I do sound effects on that that bit that I still have a don't believe in bisexual men yeah SHINee had a jihad and so I just randomly like with my I look looks like just you yelling something here and it would be like crafty gay guys and so like we started Nick I started mixing in just random like picking things and then there's a part of the joke where you I think you're talking like about if you were the gay the bisexual guy because there's one where it was like so yeah I have experience experimented once in a while that was a different bit shiny happy yeah yeah but it it works so house dude it was it people are on the floor because it sounded like you were just in the back of the room like get out that's a funny thing to like if you have one minute on stage the first thing you notice are girls being bisexual yeah it's isn't it funny how like that becomes like for people's identity like their sexuality becomes an important thing about their identity that they want to blur it out to everyone but like if you're head of heterosexual nobody does that because it's the norm you know it's the norm you don't feel like you have to get it out of the way you don't say well my name is Brian I really like girls Yeah right everybody would be like what I'm heterosexual yeah why but if you say you're bisexual people like oh my god you're adventurous yes people always tell you when they're bisexual at least guys yeah are or girls they love telling
you right but it's like the thing they do to get attention it's like you know certain girls they're always around guys they just talk about their guy problems and it's like oh I know what you're doing you're like fishing for saviors you're fishing for some guy to come along and send you some dick and fix your problem you know ii mean like some girls like god these guys I didn't they just never want to have sex you know those those little bait traps the girls set up and you're like oh my god who's gonna fall for this one stop no no echos Brian of course I do hey man it's two o'clock we gotta wrap this up tickets for Australia they're still available Tony there there's a twosome left Tegan San Francisco next weekend we're gonna cop four shows cops fool yes oh Friday on Saturday yeah oh [ __ ] she shows E tonight Oh Daniel Tony mania oh that's fun are you doing stand-up tour just doing kill tone on this we're just doing kill Tony because it's like our yearly like like fest okay cool is there a lot of comics up in San Francisco yeah and there's a lot of comics that just come down or come up for this like oh yeah for sure yeah from all the yeah area okay um read ban on Twitter or read ban on Instagram anything else nope check me out on Ari Shaffir is podcast I just did check them out epic tanker bye everybody [Music] [Applause] [Music] [Music]