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in May 26th you did a famous tweet I'll speak soon with no filter you ready to speak 100 and seismic news for the Premier League football is brutal that 15 is being rejected at Leicester 18 I got towards got a squad number took the pictures I'll know where the club says and I'll look into sign you no more you have scoliosis in your back it hasn't affected your game Tony I'm a Tony I don't feel like as Ivan Tony has won his first England caller you missed out on the final World Cup squad do you know why the allegations somebody's out to get me to stop me from playing finger Ivan Tony has been suspended for eight months with breaching at betting rules I read the whole fa report you acknowledge that you lied in that meeting with the FX I didn't lie I just couldn't really remember you admit to 232 breaches destroy those I didn't do vital responsibility so the whole process could be cleared up but the bit I to struggle with is that using someone else to do the best you'd said to give me I can't have that one in my name bets for your team to lose it's a bigger story what impact was it having on your life with me I never saw nothing I'm not sure emotions that's been times I've just I'm in a room on my own Just Looking Into Thin Air and just we're gonna get back to football clubs are gonna come knocking the next Club I'll go to if I was to move it would be before this episode starts I have a small favor to ask from you two months ago 74 of people that watch this channel didn't subscribe we're now down to 69 my goal is 50 so if you've ever liked any of the videos we've posted if you like this channel can you do me a quick favor and hit the Subscribe button it helps this channel more than you know and the bigger the channel gets as you've seen the bigger the guests get thank you and enjoy this episode [Music] foreign [Music] I always believe that to understand a person you have to understand their earliest years I kind of see our earliest years as the like oven that we're formed in so if I if if you take me back to your earliest years what do I
need to know about you to understand the man you are today what were the characteristics of that environment that shaped you just out the front of where lives like on the front is a park unlike the older guys will just be out the front playing and that's me at like seven eight trying to get involved and these guys are like 15 16 and they were playing rough no matter if you're eight nine ten trying to play with us play with them they're gonna be rough so that kind of helped me into today's game how I am now progressed a lot quicker and like even when I was like 16 breaking through Northampton I kind of had that bashing around at a young age by the older guys so being 16 getting Bust Around by men let's say I was kind of like used to it what about hard work what was your were you a hard-working man at that age in terms of running and I I never liked running I was always the lazy one at the back of the at the back of the group because I knew when it's time to get on the pitch I would score goals but like we all know hard work beats Talent when talent doesn't work hard so it's like kind of like if you've got the talent and you can work on the hard work and put them both together then you give yourself the best chance of becoming a top athlete and you and you put the work in to improve that part of your game and attitude yeah I had to because there was when I was training like when I was at Leicester I got told I wasn't getting a scholarship there so then I went to I didn't really wanna play football as much because being rejected at Leicester is kind of like okay let me just chill for now but then like my parents just like go to go to Northampton because that was a game that we played Northampton when I was at Leicester and then I think the Phantom said if anybody gets released from them let us know I think Lester must have put me in touch with Northampton and I was kind of like I'm in an hour and about going but then I ended up going and it was kind of like everybody's playing for scholarship
and then it was like on the last day everybody already knows again a scholarship and I was the only one that wasn't told so everyone is in the dressing room talking ah we've got scholarship scholarship and I'm there still on trial thinking when am I getting told and it wasn't until the next morning on the meeting like the first meeting of all the scholarship players joined up I got a phone call and said he's got a scholarship we'd like him to come down and I think that point was kind of like okay I got scholarship this is my chance now but there was a moment there where you were because of the rejection from Leicester you were considering doing something else with your life yeah I feel like nobody likes rejection like being rejected it's not the best feeling and it being like basically you're not good enough to be playing football how I saw it you're not good enough to be playing football even though it was just I'm not good enough for Leicester I might be good enough somewhere else somebody else might value what my quality is a lot more than Lester did have to see that in the moment though yeah it's very hard it's very hard and how old 16s was like 15 15 yeah that's kind of like you don't want it you don't you want that rejection again it's like a kind of fear of getting that again then when I do like I said when I got the scholarship on what's new it wasn't happening again because your journey through football just generally has been a real climb you know it's been a real real climb like and also reflect on the fact that most so many kids at that age 16 years old they get they get a rejection and they don't bounce back from it and if they don't make it to the very top they'll often take that badly and pursue a different career path but you're rejected at 16 you persevered you got into the team at Northampton you made a good um good impression there and then eventually you end up at Newcastle at what 19 18. 18 years old how was that
experience it was crazy first time away from home at such a young age 18 is like and as well you thought he was a man like from League two there was talks of you going to a Premier League team and like I would never in the Northampton changing feel like I was a man like there was talks going on but nothing's done until it's done so it's kind of like actually before I was going to Newcastle I was supposed to go to wolves right but I've got there I've got tools um I've met everybody winning the change rooms got my number on uh took the pictures they come to the contract side and then I think that was a bit of talk with my agent and the club on certain things and then it related back to us and I was all just confused me my family didn't know what was going on and then I don't know where the club come out and said um we're not looking to sign you no more due to you having scoliosis in your back so we just think it was so confused from getting the squad number meeting all the players meeting all the staff and then for them to come out and say your scoliosis in your in your back we wasn't we're not looking to sign you it's kind of like is that really the reason is there more behind it but then be from having to go back to Northampton like I've said my goodbyes at Northampton and I'm supposed to be concerning the Wolves then the next day I'm back in Northampton and training with the boys everybody's like what's happening and when I just sat me down and said listen don't dwell on that I'm sure other things will come and come into place and I think a few weeks later new class we're interested in I went there scoliosis in your back what is scoliosis and were they aware that you had scoliosis I thought there was aware because before we set up to see a specialist because they they I feel like that wanted to know what was going on how bad it was because I think it was certain scoliosis it stops you from
walking at a certain age and just gets worse and worse but I feel like I would be busy especially she said you'd be lucky to be walking at 28 still really yeah and then I was just like it doesn't really register like you think at the time at 18 I'm thinking well I'm fine now I'm I'm enjoying football now so it's that really registered but being 27. closer to 28 you kind of think well I'm strong fit and healthy food continuously so what is scoliosis where your back's not straight It's like got a slack yeah yeah hasn't affected your game I don't feel like it has and you know going back to moving to Newcastle it's like going from League two to Premier league is crazy like as soon as since I went there I don't know fancy you get recognized but it's not crazy and then go into their Newcastle I'm in the hotel everybody's recognizing me straight away it's like a crowd outside the hotel waiting to see me and it's kind of like this is what happened so fast you're away from home as well away from home bam a long way as well what you what are you feeling when Newcastle make that phone call and they they say they're interested in you and then you move there what does it feel like as an 18 year old because I can only imagine I was I was always playing football when I was younger I was always hoping a little bit to be a football I knew I wasn't good enough but you know I'm going with that whole got injured at 16. yeah he's crazy he is crazy he this is so exciting like you want to tell everybody you want to say I'm going here tomorrow yeah I'm going here I'm going here but with me how I am nothing's done till it's done especially after the Wolves stuff yeah like that was on the back of my mind so I'm thinking right just wait until it's all sorted then you can tell everyone well I'm so excited I want to tell this person that person this is something so yeah it was it was crazy my head was all over the place I'm thinking
I'm actually going to the Premier League like I've made it I'm here but little did I know is how far if I made it what happened I feel like when you take that step you get you get noticed more you get more money and just just do silly things like like you get mixed in the wrong crowd going out and buying things you wouldn't normally Buy just a bit naive and it's as well being away from my family although they kept on telling me don't do nothing silly look after your money this and that you're gonna think okay but they're not here to control what I've got hold of right now I can spend it on this I can spend on that like you just do things like I said things you never normally do like we're getting personal shoppers to come to the house and you don't think I'll go to the shop and buy yourself stuff if you want to do that so it's like these kind of things but yeah I think it didn't come at me fast I wouldn't say that I'd say just like a surprise kind of thing like like I said I thought I'd made it so whatever happens I'm fine I'm in the Premier League what was the advice that you needed at that point that you didn't get like if you could go back now and have a chat with Ivan and say listen bro you arrive at Newcastle that day and you get a chance just to say a couple of things to him what'd you say I'll sit down and have a long chat with him it would be a long chat no I think I'll just say like this is where the hard work starts it's not finished you're not you can't pull it on cruise control you got to go to exit gear like yeah I'm at a Premier League club but I haven't played yet I've not got continuous games under my belt to be saying okay I'm a premier league player now so it's like I'd say to yeah a younger Ivan or anybody that's in that situation go and
doing such a big jump to say that's when the hard work starts were you in cruise control do you think yeah yeah if if I even was moving I'd probably put a handbrake on really yeah I just thought I'm Premier League now as well you've seen all the big boys like literally training there it's like yeah I'm here now and you play two games before they loaned you out yeah come off the bench twice against United and Chelsea and then you went on quite a long loan spell Barnsley Shrewsbury Wiggins gunthorpe when you find out you're getting loaned out how do you receive that as a player I've always wondered this when you're a young player in the club big you're in the Premier League because I think there's a lot about Manchester United as a big fan we always low now are like younger ads and I wonder how how that's positioned to you as a player and how you receive it it's not the best feeling okay because at the time it's kind of like I want you know I'm here like I'm here now you want to send me away like yeah and you got the personal shopper coming over exactly yeah yeah so I need to I need to sort some things out to me come in Shrewsbury yeah I don't think you'll travel that far But now y'all I feel like like it's at that age you don't really think what you're gonna learn for I mean first team experience is this is probably the best at that age as well and like knowing that because I feel like I just specter Houston football is cool like tick attacker pretty football then go into League one like I said on loan you're gonna get bashed around so you need to be ready for that physical battle and I feel like going online definitely help me looking back now it helped me a lot but at the time I was thinking I don't need to go and learn I'm ready to be playing in the Premier League I feel like from Young I've always had that that my dad always told me no matter where you are if you have that mentality that you're a premier league player but at the moment you're just on League one that's fine but if you don't have that mentality that
I'm a premier league player so I don't need to try here then it's not going to work out so it doesn't matter where you are if you have the mentality I should be playing in the Prem but right now I'm playing here that's fine and I feel like you you go you go a Long Way to the where I am now um I'm feeling playing that bit of device that my dad gave me was very key when you went off on loan and they say okay you're leaving Newcastle now does that take you out of cruise control and into like I've got something to prove again it should it should have it did but it didn't really because I always believed that no matter what happened where I went I'm going back to Newcastle so no matter if I played didn't play at all or played rubbish I'm going back to Newcastle back to the Premier League but not knowing the effects that could have well it did have in the end even though I think all the clubs I went to about one hour I left goal scorer but it was like I could have looking back I feel like I could have went that extra step further yeah scunthorpe united six girls and 15 appearances showed a huge promise while you're on your loan spells as a prolific goal scorer and then at 22 years old you transferred to Peterborough United after failing to secure a regular place at Newcastle now that that must have been an interesting moment because that's kind of like another knock back in it goes back to like Lester the Leicester rejection and stuff that's like another step down you've made it to the Prem and now you've got to take a step down yeah it was a must not actually not I wouldn't say a massive not not back it was a knockback but it was kind of like maybe a not back I needed at the time because like I remember sitting down with my dad and my agent at the time and saying listen
like me me and my dad are brutal whoever we work with we want not we want the honest honest truth no matter if they say we don't want him he's not good enough for us I'd rather my agent tell me that but how the relationship was that the agent with my agent at the time it kind of sugarcoat things right so meanwhile that kind of had to get out of him what did the club say like just tell us be honest and his words were the club don't think you're good enough already at the time at this moment in time so it's kind of like in my head it's like okay fine no problem it's time for me to go elsewhere then regroup restart it wasn't like I was too old it was just it was just uh not back and set back that like I said at the time probably needed to kick start my journey again do you think Newcastle were right in saying that um possibly like don't get me wrong you go to a great Club they had some they've had some great players in doing very well at the moment but I feel like I didn't really have a chance in the first team to prove if I was good good enough I feel personally anyway I know too far at the time was when Newcastle were fighting to stay stay up in the Premier League when Rafa Benitez first come in oh yeah so it's kind of understandable you wanted these players uh try and keep them up we wanted to experience and stuff more than like to be given youth younger players a chance and stuff is that what you're saying yeah I feel like I mean you can't really put so much responsibility on you players or young players to keep you up in the Premier League it's such a big ask but I feel like maybe The Following Season it was kind of like could he get a Sniff and I think he kind of was it is his own players in them and done his own own thing which is that's football so if you go to Peterborough um you're close to your family at this point yeah yeah oh Mommy's boy at Art so I leave my mum around close and did it change your attitude moving to Peterborough unlike this whole cruise
control thing yeah he did and especially when I went to first went to Peterborough I wasn't playing at the first I'd say 10 games the strikers out in front of me it was scoring every game assistant playing well but the manager at the time Steve Evans was just saying the warrior trance will come and when your chance comes it's up to you to take it a new trance came yeah and then took it uh yeah 100 took it he scored 24 goals in 32 League One games at Peterborough which is insane yeah yeah like well like the competitions all over the field but especially as as a striker you need to you drop the school goals and especially when the other two scoring goes if you get a one Sniff and you don't score you'll back out again and it gives him another opportunity the director of football at Peterborough said you were an incredibly hard worker he also said you were their best defender because you headed away nine out of ten Corners I feel like yeah them games I kind of had a magnet on my head that was just bringing the vote towards me but yeah now I think the hard work as well like when I'm loved by a manager I feel like I'm a club I feel like it's in me to want to give back I want to do a lot of things for like run for a brick wall four the manager that's wanted me in this position did they become like proxy father figures to you in that regard because you're clearly a man that's close to your father did they kind of you see what I'm saying is that is it a similar relationship like uh where you want to do them proud when I first signed a piece with Steve Evans like the first time you spoke to me he was just it was like a friend like a normal chat even though you got the respect as a manager but he was saying listen I want you to come in school girls and go go go how like the goal just go for us benefits you and us because we're going to go higher and you're going to go out so it's a win-win and I think
him putting an arm around me at that time knowing I've come from a Premier League club and saying it's not really not back this is where you kicks out your journey again having that I think definitely helped me and didn't you have I read somewhere that you had a agreement with them like a verbal agreement that if a bigger Club came knocking they wouldn't stand in your way Peterborough that probably was a verbal agreement but if anybody knows the fee of a fever staff and the owners and therefore we have different ideas but I mean yeah I guess when I did go that was the right timing like every every player thinks when there's a move on the cars you want to try and rush it through and if things aren't right they're not right for a reason like you can't rush good things good things aren't rust I think at the time that was a chance I could have went to somewhere I try and rush it through and it was like don't worry oh really so there was office from other clubs there was office from other clubs yeah but big clubs um biggest at a time okay Championship clubs yeah Championship clubs and he was saying just just be patient you're gonna get a better club and I'm just there like not kick him out I'm not throwing my toys out of the problem just be like wow it's just a chance to move now who used to know what can happen blah blah and then I ended up staying in and I went to Brentford which was probably the best choice in the end and around this time I mean just before then 21 years old you become a father for the first time yeah I mean that's that's as well what helps me Kickstart My Journeys as well because I feel like I've got people to provide for um I have expensive taste as well so it's either choosing my expensive taste for my family so if I could school goals and help both then it's perfect so I think that's what helped me pick things up and I had to provide for people does that Focus you because I'm not a dad yet but it's around the corner for me I'm sure um does that Focus your priorities in a
sense like does it make because I speak to my mates who have always had kids and they almost described that moment when their baby first comes they kind of see the world differently and they're like responsibilities differently and stuff 100 100 like you can't do the things you normally do you have to think baby first in all aspects did it make your game better 100 yeah yeah 100 definitely how it's in like I want to make him proud so when he's older that's my dad he's done this he's doing this this is this so it's kind of like a pride thing as well as wanting to do well for my family and have a better better lifestyle for everybody not just me and my people provide for when did you find out that Brentford are interested it was actually training at St George's Park yeah uh with Peterborough and there's talks of going here there and I was kind of like I'm gonna know him just like yeah when it's when it's something concrete then let me know right now I just want to focus on training hard because it's easy to if you let us stray when this club's interested in you this club's interesting you hear loads of things but then nothing's concrete like this is all well and good he's looking at you he's looking at you but this time I'm not a kid no more when they want me and put a bidding then we can start talking was hearing they're interested what does that mean that doesn't mean nothing like everybody can be interested but nobody wants you yeah yeah so when Brentford come along and I was I was interested and actually put a bid in that's great it's like okay I spoke to the manager he kind of it was straightforward and said you're gonna come in and be the main man we want you to be starting every game and school goals and do your job then either take us up or go to a go to a higher Club so you get that call from Brentford they put a bid in you speak to the manager Thomas Frank yes and Thomas says listen you're going to be on number one I think it was a no-brainer I think I
did speak to other clubs um actually I went into Rangers oh nice spoke with uh the manager there which is Steven Gerard at the time and Manchester United did you speak to yeah they said I wasn't good enough yeah I went to I went to um went to Rangers we spoke a bit but then they said I was like twos of those two strikes at the time and then I was looking to get another one in so it would have been like four strikes I think and I think the formation they played majority of the time one strike at top so you would have been like third choice or something yeah something like this but and then uh we went to Celtic we spoke to Celtic and I think it was like the same there I'm one of three strikes or something like this and I think at the time of when it was I was moving I wanted to be like the main guy like I think the crucial thing for me is playing games even though I backed myself on competing with other Strikers but I honestly know that when I go in what first first through the door on the main man up front and it's up to me to keep my position I feel like when I went to uh when I spoke to the manager at Brentford he pretty much said you're the main guy and I don't see nobody taking your spot so you make sure you produce produce the goods and it feels really you you've worked a lot of clubs um you've played a lot of different clubs brunfield are special they're really really special because they are based on their resources they are objectively over achieving in a really really significant way um what is it about Brentford from your experience that is make what is that magic that they have hard work plain and simple hard work like we're not the best technically gifted team we have some magicians in the team but other than that it's just hard work I mean and we fear nobody we respect them we don't fear them
so when we go to the let's say I'm filled away or Chelsea aware of these kind of games we know they're probably on paper better than us got some big names and this and that but if at the end of the day the main thing that wins the games is hard work and a little bit of quality I guess putting the hole in the back of the net and I feel like throughout the throughout the club everybody knows what the manager wants you have to you have to you have to be willing to run for your teammate plus your left first your right and the fans and everybody and everybody knows the responsibility they have on their shoulders when they step onto the pitch so I think that's that's probably what's brought us to where and how well we're doing at the moment and even like at the moment the team playing without me I hear and people say oh drinking breakfast we're going to be like this now you're not playing this and that I don't think in no they're not gonna struggle because they work hard and when you work hard you give yourself the best chance of winning the game and I I know deep down Brentford would be fine with or without me well you've played a lot of clubs right so you can kind of compare and contrast is there anything else other than just that work ethic that you've noticed is just different at Brentford so you've got super hard work is there anything else their approach to things or the strategy or the way that they I feel like they're to govern this as well how everybody's like everybody talk to everyone I've been at clubs where it's like a certain groups it there certain groups that they're like everybody's divided it's like but it's not that rental everybody makes it to everybody how you got people of Spanish Danish which is majority of the club at the moment um English and everything and everybody just mix it together so it's not like oh let me where my friends where should I sit down at lunch you just get your lunch sit down here you talk with
forever and the manager that comes from him I feel like he makes sure that togetherness and humbleness like there's no nobody at the club thinks they're better than nobody like even last season I scored 20 goals I was I wasn't about nobody I Was the Same the person that doesn't really play too much they're not less of a person than me we're all the same we'll in it together so I feel like that comes from the manager and his philosophy at the club and how he wants things to be run what are the things that you often think with managers and CEOs and stuff like there's they have their like core principles which you just get bored of hearing because they say over and over and over and over again what are those things that he just repeats over and over and over again togetherness yeah humble yeah an attitude and I guess he polices that pretty yeah all the time it's all over the club it's all in the meetings which is probably why like I said we do we're doing so well as a club and as a whole whole unit what's the what's the dressing room the training ground dressing room culture like I can ask this because I've spoken to so many players at United in particular and especially in the Fergie areas they always talk about the like the self-policing culture in the dressing room you know like what's that like versus other clubs yeah it's like like I said it's yeah it's good there's other clubs I've been at has it's been good as well but not how it is in Brentford I feel like Brentford is probably one of the best dressings I've been in in terms of everybody knows that drill everybody knows that position everybody's helping others like everybody's just like the respect if something's on the floor tidy pick up pull in there like them kind of things is key if you want to be achieving something big and I feel like with that in the change room as well as in the gym
or in the in the dinner is key and everybody's up for everybody it was it's like one big family unit 26 years old you're named brentford's player of the season um you scored 12 goals in the First Premier League season and then you scored 20 goals in your second Premier League season finishing third in the golden beat rankings behind Harland and Harry Kane that's big yeah it is big is Big but sometimes I don't really realize how big it is because sometimes I'm at home I'm thinking yeah well not first in my head if you're not first you're lost then let my family say but look who you're behind and look at the caliber players that are playing in the Premier League and you scored more than these guys I'm always thinking yeah but I could have scored more and you think it's called more than Holland I mean not more but I look back on chances that should have been a goal and I feel like there probably is like 15 15 16 chances that I probably could have scored or should have scored so if I was as clinical as Ireland was not to say I'll beat him but I could be a lot higher than a lot higher than 20. England 's football team I saw I think I saw a post on your Instagram a couple of weeks ago about that being a huge dream for you to play for England yeah I think everybody wants to pay for England yeah I remember just screaming like Gerard's name and the lampard's name like when I'm on the field just kicking and they said when that opportunity was around and I was in talks of it just didn't it didn't feel real from being Ivan from the fountain just playing out the front getting bashed around by the old a lot too actually having a chance to play for England was something I would never have jumped off you missed out on the final World Cup squad
um lots of circulating rumors about why do you know why um I guess I guess it comes down to allegations on the Ben scandal but I feel like personally I felt like it was a bit of a questionable time when they decided to bring it all out and then when they actually dealt with the situation come the end of the season is kind of like why'd you bring out then to and then punish me at the end of the season so they brought so I guess you're saying that you suspect they brought it out at that time to prevent you going to play for England I assume so I'm to make it a bigger story ah okay personally anyway I don't know if it's true that how not to know what's behind the scenes but I feel like if you have somebody go into the World Cup that's supposed to be betting then it's kind of like a bigger story what's the real I'm not really clued up on this or how fa thinks the fa the England team play Under the fa yeah and the fa are also the sort of body that brought the charges against you yeah so they so one might assume that they release the charges at that point because if they didn't then there might be some ramifications on the England team or the perceptions of England team or something yeah I assume so right like I'm not too aware of all this stuff but I feel like it was a bit of a coincidence when they desire to bring it all out and then having to be dealt with the punishment at the end of the season so far after it's kind of like I mean you know well I feel like yes I'm banned now but the biggest punishment for me was missing out on playing at the World Cup personally I felt more hurt and what's the word kind of like yeah I just I just felt I felt down around the time it felt like
somebody's out to get me at that time to stop me from playing for England it was in my head like that's just how I seen it at the time it's like they want to punish me for this missing out on England the World Cup like everybody's dream to be playing at the World Cup and then further down the line ban me as well it's kind of like a double hit I feel in a sense was like I said if he was going to do if he's gonna stop me from going to World Cup do it there and then and deal with it deal with the whole situation rather than doing that missing out on the World Cup and then let me play the rest of the season and then binding me off to the season is it is not enough in my head to be fair anyway I felt down about it what does that mean in real terms if I was a flyer on the wall in your life when when that information came in that was probably my excuse me that was probably that the lowest point I was like with me I'll never show nothing I'm not sure emotion too tough but I think that was probably the lowest point I felt like you'd ask me about uh yeah he's always but that is what it is it's kind of like I don't want to talk about it yeah damn it hurt it did hurt do you cry no I don't feel like crying solves anything personally that's my personal views everybody says to we need to show emotion you can cry isn't this it's okay but like I feel like I've only acquired once when I see my Nancy from losing my pap and seeing her her as much as she was killed me inside and it was kind of like I didn't cry cry but it was like tears in my eyes coming down and it's kind of like it was painful do you express your how you're feeling to anyone in your life at that point to your partner to your family your mum your dad when you when you find out that you're not going to play for England and
they've you know the rumors are out about this gambling situation do you tell anyone how you're actually feeling um no but people that know me know my actions and how that leads to how I'm feeling like I'd be a lot more like Snappy about things or I'll just be like I can just be like a zombie talking to me and it's not like really registering but my head's not really in the room kind of thing and that people that know me know like something's up something's wrong what was the reality of the situation what was going on inside your head and how was it when you say down and you say that was the lowest point how what does that mean in real terms um I wouldn't say depressed as such but it's kind of like not far off that if anything towards that direction but not completely because like that's still how I stay in my head it's like next opportunity next next day another day is another day to put things right and try and be as positive as I can have you ever had anxiety probably but how I am I don't let it get to me as much like I'd say the loan spells when when I'm on loan I'm in a room on my own there's been times I've just literally sat there and about the TV on just just sat there I'm just like chilling and just looking to thin air and just thinking about things but I've never actually I'd never like let nobody know how I'm feeling because how I am as a person I feel like it it eats away at me but I'm just always a smiley one always like I asked people at Brent for now on the Drake I'm making sure everyone's fine these kind of things I think that's my kind of way of beating my emotions
um if I see this person happy for me doing that then it kind of brings me up to make me happy kind of thing did you did you not speak to anyone like a professional about about this stuff because I always think when we bottle up our emotions it's not like they go away it's like almost like they they eat us up from inside and they they come out in other ways like you were saying snappiness or whatever or you know surely there's someone around you that said you need to see someone yeah that's yeah there was but as well me being stubborn is kind of like nah I'm fine it's fine like I'll be right next tomorrow I'll be right later I'll be right next week I feel like I can speak to anyone in my family but like my stomach is just don't allow me to I think a lot of men can relate to that you know yeah 100 I feel like that personally in May 20 26th uh you did a famous tweet do you know that's what I'm talking about yeah I'll speak soon with no filter you ready to speak um what did that tweet mean that was just speak on everything really but obviously when I've done that they went crazy and then I think my family just said listen you don't need to talk just when you get on a pitch that if you do the talking but what's up damage is done you can't talk and it's not gonna help no situation if anything could not damage my reputation or my career but just make people think not that I care what people think is just could put in the words that who do you think he is that kind of thing but it doesn't benefit no parties what headspace were you and when you tweeted that probably a reckless one really yeah how are you feeling thinking I don't care attitude I'd say kind of a defense mechanism against pretty much yeah against everybody like even like little things like
for the whole situation not not like my friends my friends my friends the one I sit with better people I chill with all the time but it's even that one that goes I don't know if it's just me thinking side of things but it's like when I go certain places like maybe some people don't want to be associated with me in a certain way of obviously because the media kind of thing and it's kind of like not killing that image but it's kind of like you're doing this guy he's a match fixer his match fixing football the the I'm not even like I remember at the time when there was allegations I wanted to go to a restaurant and I was like no you can't uh we're not taking you the restaurant a restaurant I was like what do you mean that's ours because the allegations we're not allowing you in or something like this I was actually so confused I was thinking for starters it's allegations and secondly your restaurant how can you not let somebody introduce a bad press That's Why They Call It Bad press I was just baffled and even to like my car insurance they wouldn't insult me due to the whole scandal I was just like a car insurance they don't want me on their books because which was baffling I read through the the whole um fa report many many pages I think it was like 25 2500 pages I have it here just to understand the case better just so I made sure I didn't make any errors in my observations but there's no I think there's actually a line in there where the commissions say they um didn't believe you were doing any match fixing it was far from match fixing yeah I wrote that down in my in my notes that um They concluded that you hadn't been match fixing or anything like that in the report um so that that allegation from whoever said that the restaurant or whatever um doesn't seem to have a basis in the report at all I'm sure there was certain articles on saying match fixing as well which is that's probably the media for
you making it a big talking point when the fa first Contact you and and they ask they make a request for information don't they so they want to know more information this is dating back to 2022 I believe when you get that first Contact how does that feel like your dad or your agent must have told you that the fa have been in touch well they wanted information from as far back as 2015. so it's kind of like well I haven't got that uh I had back then to give you information but I wanted to cooperate how I can to let you investigate what you want to investigate and when I was when I the club actually pulled me into a room and they spoke to me and said they're faving in touch with you match fixing this and that they want to speak to you and I said okay this is Brentford yeah that's okay no problem like then he is that have you done any bits whilst whilst you've been at Brentford and have you been betting on football and I was like no I haven't I haven't done no bets are fixing fixing football match fixing football like he's like okay well therefore I want to speak to you don't delete nothing on your phone because there's a system like they said they can get like old messages or whatever they said I said no problem I'm not I'm not doing nothing if they can go through what they want to go through and then they called you in for an interview in May 2022. yeah and they ask you all these questions again about what you've been involved in with betting Etc yeah and they asked me certain things happen like I said seven eight years ago onto the top of my head so much information in front of me at one time it's kind of like as you can't remember I can't remember and there's I think I was in there for like what five hours five hours yeah but at that time you you maintained to them that you're not betting on football yeah and I was I wasn't aware what what that was what I was trying to get you acknowledged later on that you you
basically lied in that meeting with the fa I didn't lie I just couldn't really remember what what they was asking for at the time I couldn't remember until they brought certain things in front of me and it was kind of like okay he's talking about my memory and we like I said I cooperate with everything they wanted to do and we kind of spoke on it and then I told him the truth about everything one of the things people might find surprising is they they asked for your they asked for your mobile phones and stuff and then they like image your mobile phones to check like all the messages you've sent to people going back a long time on the on these phones to find out everything you've been said and also as you said they they ask you not to delete any messages which you didn't from from what the commission said um but how does that feel when the fa asks for your mobile phone and they you know they're going to scan it for everything it doesn't feel yeah it's just kind of like it's your privacy and they're like invading it it's kind of like I've got certain pitch on there I won't want them to see like these kind of things so it's pretty much like you have to go with what they're saying otherwise I feel like I think you get a longer band for not cooperating or something like this so what what can I do yes you want to take my phone take my phone and all your bank statements as well they also your bank statements which you handed over as well yeah um you hand it over I believe multiple phones no just one phone oh just the one yeah I thought there was a there was some they said that was another phone but that wasn't that much fun I had that as well and then eventually you admit to 232 breaches of their rules and their favorite E8 um which is betting over five seasons from 25th of February 2017 debating up until January 21. yes and like I said there was people saying I was match fixing but none of it was match fixing it was just like I said
before I was betting myself to school first from I think this was a while back and it's kind of like that's not like I'm not trying to not try and I'm still trying to do the right thing it's not like I'm smashing someone and getting a yellow card here then everywhere yeah and the report actually does say that it says that you weren't you weren't this the commission said that you weren't match fixing which is a completely different completely different thing yeah they're making bets on like games that you're either you're playing in on yourself to school all betting on the team when you're not in the team which is what from what I read which is what what happened gambling and generally when did that start in your life when did you start first gambling um I think it's just kind of like as you're young it's like a little flutter they call it like you're in like the fair arcade kind of thing just trying to win a little change or something or these kind of things so I'd say like around 15 or 15 and such and it and it got progressively worse yeah I'd say the more money you get the more the higher the seats go that's kind of like oh if I lose this it's fine this is coming next month was did you not realize you know throughout those sort of five years when you were betting a lot 232 breaches that your relationship with betting was unhealthy I think on the on the 200 and was it for 82 breaches like that was there was some bets in there that ladder record making that that but I was willing to take responsibility just to get the process all over and done with because having that hovering over me and trying to concentrate my career is not is not the best feeling far from the best feeling and then Adam I've done well to finish on 20 goals if that hanging over me but in terms of thinking do you have a problem it's kind of like you don't think of if I lose this this is gonna happen
so it's like oh once I won this this this and this can happen you never think of the negatives you'd always think of the positives and being on the money I was on which affords a lot of time and it's kind of like it's fine I'll get there in the back end of the month oh that's coming back this and this month oh he owes me this it's fine what impact was it having on your life betting um I feel like it was just the impact it would have it was just waiting for payday right that might happen through the month she weren't prepared it but you could spend your wage and then wait for payday spend your wage wait for payday yeah well I'd pay and sort everything I need to pay for first and then it's like I got this play with do that it's fine but it'll come soon so it wasn't it wasn't like spend this money I should be giving here or paying on this you took care of your I took care of what needed to be careful and my head is kind of like my money is my money for I couldn't spend it how I wanna and yeah pretty much pretty much like that I've made my money it's up to me I want to spend it one of the one of the things that was quite surprising is bets against bets for your team to lose when you weren't playing in the team the you you must you knew bedding was wrong right like you knew that as a footballer you weren't allowed to bet my knowledge of not my knowledge of betting on football though I don't think I recall once somebody coming and just giving a talk on their experience but not you can't bet on football so it wasn't like I shouldn't be better than this shouldn't be bad on that and I feel like I think the best that on my team to lose when I'm not playing I think a few of the majority of those were within the bets that I know about a person I think I didn't didn't do but I still took responsibility of them for them so the whole process
could get cleared up and you um you don't know about some of these bets you're saying because you did them through somebody else yeah because and you did them through somebody else because you you knew you weren't allowed to right it wasn't through that I didn't knew I wasn't allowed to is that I didn't see what I didn't want my parents seeing while I'm doing my money this was a point of contention in the documents the fa said you know he's betting through somebody because he didn't want he didn't want the fa to find out you're saying you you bet through somebody else because your parents the male was going to the house and you didn't want them opening up the post and seeing it yeah that's right essentially that was a point I mean the commission go go their own way on that um and then okay so moving on from that there's there's all these aggravating factors in the in the document um was he aware of the rules I think you eventually admitted that you were aware of the rules in terms of not being able to bet on football um going back to the days I think at Northampton I think was it Northampton um one of your previous chat I think your previous chairman at the football club was thrown out because of a betting Scandal and then you have a relative in your life that was also issued with a breach of the fa rules for betting in 2007 as well so they can commission concluded that you were aware of the rules and that you couldn't bet but you sort of counteract that by saying you didn't have I think it was it was kind of a gray area right but I think there was a time where like I said the the clubs I've been at they were like beginning of every season though I feel like they'd have somebody come in but not actually tell you what you can and what you can't bet on what would that person say just like this is its experiences on betting like he'd come in and say this is uh and then I've lost this much I've gone through this so when if you think about Ben don't do it so it wasn't like you can't be banned on football or you can't be betting on yeah you can't be better on football it was just his experiences of going through a
gambling stage because uh so so you didn't know you could you couldn't bet as a player no I think it was a gray area something like you'd hear you can you hit it you can't and then there's certain things you say you can't bet on like I feel like it was a gray area and you admitted in the second aggravating factors about knowing knowing whether you basically missing to whether you were betting or not and in the interview with the commission during the process you said that you had lied early on by saying I don't vote on football in an earlier interview um but you know that was one of the first interviews you had and you had responded I didn't burn football and yeah that that wasn't accurate yeah that was when obviously they threw everything got me I thought if I was just deny it then it's it's all fine I wouldn't find nothing but then went through and then yeah I'd meet uh I'm admitted to what Adam in the fa the fourth average rate in fact was whether the player sought to conceal his identity when he set up his own betting account 2017 the commission um didn't accept the fa submission there they didn't they didn't believe that you'd concealed it in that regard um whether the player deleted messages issue number five commission concluded that there wasn't evidence that you deleted any messages they they I was accused of dilemma's yeah that's right yeah by the fa but the commission said that they didn't have substantial evidence for that yeah um kind of just I was told not to and you didn't delete nothing from the club the commission couldn't find any evidence that you had deleted anything so um and then the phone issue we've talked about already the last issue was around whether you had a gambling addiction and they brought out a psychologist called Dr Philip hopley who looked you did interviews with you um he's a highly qualified and experienced psychiatric expert according to the commission and he interviewed you on two occasions and he formed a clear opinion that you had a gambling addiction and accordingly the commission accepted
the findings of the doctor on this issue and that's part of the reason that you were given a more lenient sentence um because Dr hopley said that you had an impulsive uh compulsive disorder yeah was that the first time you'd heard of gambling addiction yeah through this process this tribunal yeah because I feel like it wouldn't be in me to bring myself forward to speak to one of these people to see if I did have one so it's kind of like like I said my stubbornness comes comes into play on this one it's kind of like no fine I can stop when I want to stop did he expect someone explain to you a gambling addiction is since then a little bit yeah we did speak with us how to play on on around around one addiction is but it's kind of like you don't allow yourself to believe it like I feel like it's gonna stop doing something I feel like people think in the head I can stop with one but not not knowing deep down you probably can't could you have stopped probably yeah it's it's I feel like it's 50 50. you could have stopped but I feel like a thrill on it is kind of like what keeps you going because the fa though sort of counterpointed that was that there was periods where you you didn't you didn't gamble so they would they were saying that to the commission that you know it's not gambling addiction because there's parts of his journey where he's not gambling or he's betting on other things for example um do you still gamble now no anything no any betting at all across any not has that required therapy or any sort of professional support I think it's kind of being in the public eye if I was to be like going into these places and these kind of things I think it's more the embarrassment those eyes still continue this kind of thing so I I wouldn't allow myself and like you look back you I feel like he's
sit take a back seat and look up all the money you've lost and what you could have went on and what and especially now having people to provide for it's kind of like you can't be spending that money on this it can go to to here or like just manage your money bro our luck of things and how I look at me off I see that as being naive we don't really get much information do we uh growing up about gambling well really it had it like how to spend our money or tax especially I think about you guys as like young you know 20 year olds that I just you know playing football and then you become millionaires because you're good at it it's kind of different for like my Pursuit because like building a business you have to see a focus your Finance people around you you have controls budgets forecasts P L's all this stuff so you know you're surrounded by like money minds and brains around you when you're building a business but being a young 20 year old millionaire who I'm presuming nobody gave you Financial education no it's kind of like you said yeah being having that much money at tender age it's kind of like what do I do with it and I'm not a family that comes from money so it's not like my parents could help me a lot with that but they they would have their say on certain things but it's like you kind of have to try and just manage it yourself and just assume doing this is the right thing you don't know what you don't know pretty much the bit of this case that I that I was I was I found difficult is that using someone else to do the best because for me that's that points to like in that he did know I think that's what people would think they'd look at that again of course 100 conceal it because I'm thinking your mom your mom and dad ain't opened your post at 27 years old like my mum ain't gonna open my post no this was it was when I was away yeah so I know my post did go to my parents and I feel like of course your parents want to be
knowing what's going on if you're getting this letter through that's you're not paying this or like like I said seeing what you're spending your money on and I feel like because we're a tight family my mom would worry about that and there was actually times where she's opened it and she's kind of said certain things about it and the fa had highlighted text message you'd sent me you said to give me I can't have that one in my name what was the app I gambled on on your phone this time from text messages that they'd found that's the bit that I struggled with was I was like I wasn't sure that but this chapter of your life has clearly been a big learning moment 100 I feel like looking back on what I've done what I changed some bits probably but is what it is and the man I'm now continuing forward is kind of but it's different to what I was before do you take like when we think about responsibility for our actions what's what what responsibility do you take for all of this where you say listen this is this is what I take responsibility for here um and this is also like going back to a question I asked earlier about like what do you wish someone had had said you when you first did that I don't know those those bets five five six seven years ago um what's the responsibility you take and what's the what's the lesson you've taken from this process I think the responsibility I'd take was yeah I was betting on myself to the school first which now you I know you shouldn't be doing which I take responsibility and I'll take full responsibility for the punishment I'm getting now so uh it was it would be kind of a lack and why I tell my younger self around them kind of times it's like manage your money but don't get mixed in there wrong crowd I say and just just don't follow fashion of your own of your own mindset uh mind frame on what you should and should be doing or if you don't know look more into it and
if that's what you really want to do look more into it and what you can and can and can't do it's interesting because when they were deliberating your your punishment one of the things that came to mind is perception and what it would the perception it would send to the rest of the the game um do you think they they made an example of you I feel so yeah do you think that's right I can't I don't think it's right now but because you're a high profile Premier League player obviously if if you get away with doing something like this this could other players lower levels could also emulate it so they've got an opportunity here to send a message 100 100 and I feel like a lot of people think that in terms of if no disrespects are lower leagues but if I was well actually we actually did look at some cases that was somewhat similar someone worse and their punishment wasn't like how mine is I think the fact that's the opportunity the fact that I'm playing in the Premier League doing well snifferon England kind of like right it's our chance to punish him then people know this is kind of the punishment you're looking at if you want to do why don't it's funny because I was actually surprised to read that in the the um the analysis section of this document where it says the perception of the impact of football betting on the Integrity of the game is key a key consideration when deciding on your sanction which does kind of suggest that they're quite intentional in making sure that they make an example of you um thereabouts in their words um and obviously you have a huge position of influence so that's that's key um and then they submit that the FAS suggested that you get 12 months ban as a suspension I believe and that was their final sanction the commission didn't accept that
um ordinarily the commission would have imposed 50 15 months suspension had you not pled guilty to the charges which lowered your sanction and then also you've got another um reduction in the sanction because of the findings from the Doctor Who found that you had a gambling addiction which brought your sentence down to eight months um and you'll find fifty thousand pounds it's interesting because you know I'm a huge football fan so I want to see you play and I you're on such a role Brentford are on such a role so like as a football fan although you smashed United last year like it was so it's so good to see like a young black English striker tearing up the game at his Peak it's getting to see you out of the game it is and I feel like like how I am a lot of people know how I stay this is this is nothing I I know for a fact I'll come back stronger than this I'm better than I was before like this is gives me the hunger against uh recharge and come back on on another another level like like I said before earlier no time to dwell on things no time to dwell on things and it's like just when that first game comes and I can play then it's not a ball game it's on when you found out you you suspended for eight months how did that feel what's that like um because you know you're in the peak of your powers right now right yeah I know it's it's painful but I feel like the hard part isn't kind of not because right now I'll be playing football matches and I kind of be around the players and not the football ground and things like this and it's kind of like okay that's what you want to do punish me from there but I thought I'd keep me away from the ground if I wasn't as strong as I was in my head that would break some people and then we talk about mental health and all these kind of things and what's that kind of doing to a player that's not allowed in the environment even though you can't play games but keeping away from the training ground
knowing football's their life and that's all they've done from such a young age how is that going to help them at all yeah this is I completely agree with you I think I think the sanction itself is important because it does send a message and I agree with that but the bit that I just struggle with is the can't train at the club and we know as you you point out there like mental health keeping active is such an important thing especially if you've been playing football since you're a kid and it's your purpose it's what you know um so psychologically and physically there's a a real strong case to keep your keep you active and I've seen a lot of people have their say on this a lot of people think you know you could have trained at the ground and then use that time to educate young players on on gambling that would have been useful but to keep you out of the club not allow you to train and to kind of push you out on your own it seems doesn't feel like it's smart it doesn't it doesn't add up with what the things they push forward like like we say the old football Community is on big on Mental Health then the fa go and do this and like push me away from like my the whole football environment like by all means it's not a place where I want people to feel sorry for me like that's the last thing that's the last thing I want and me as a person people that know me with no that's not what one thing I'm trying to achieve but so that says what if somebody that's not as strong as me in their head happens to be going through this kind of situation and that punishment is not allowed at the training ground like that would break them like right now I've been not been around a training ground it does hurt me but I just know when I'm at the training ground train harder be ready for the the game when I can play but it's yeah it's like I said it's not a nice feeling and the whole purpose of not being allowed at the training ground is it's baffling to me but you have hard days still
yeah yeah yeah I feel like everybody has others I mean like with through this process has there been days where like you're ups and your downs and difficult days where you start you have low moments because you are away from football the Press is on top of you yeah I feel like I've a hard Hours hard two hours kind of things like in the mornings I'd wake up like ah come yesterday but getting a song active when you're there working it's kind of like oh yeah as much as you don't want to do it you've seen the long run that that time I didn't want to get up I didn't want to do on uh put the work in it's paying off now whereas if I'm saying all tomorrow and then tomorrow comes I'll do it next day so you're still training yeah yeah still keeping fit still doing my own thing welcome to personal trainer yeah personal trainer which is which is good and it's not like a lenient one this one one that pushes me so I feel like I'm not got it good but I've got the best people around me to keep me fit and keep me going and like I said my family is key my family is the one that's what the other people that's helping me going as well and especially my children you're you're a mummy's boy yeah sometimes in these moments it's it's difficult for us but it's harder to watch the impact has on our family right yeah 100 I feel like like even when the whole thing was it was like those allegations and the people like going into my mum's work and just saying certain things and I'd be at a petrol station they scream certain things and I'll be with my family and my children and people just be like shouting dumb things out just like oh you pointed like certain things that are you put the tenor on today's game or these kind of things or just silly image all things and how I am I'm kind of hot-headed but especially when families are involved and my children are around it's kind of like
it's hard for me not to want to say something called do something cool these kind of things it's like going through that period right it's hard and people that you wouldn't normally speak to or my parents or family wouldn't normally speak to that'd pop up and just be like oh something Reviving so it's when the bad things come along how you want to talk and find out what's going on whereas when I'm screwing goals or getting big for England you don't really want to say too much but that's life and that's how people are and we don't miss them we see them we see the evil eyes so it's has this process been um has it illuminated um things for you in certain areas of your life certain people and some people that their View and stuff you know because I haven't even thinking about the gaffer Thomas Frank he's come to your defense multiple times talking about how he disagrees with the way that it's been handled the sanctions and he thinks that you should be able to train with the team and um be out there educating young kids etc etc he disagrees with the the decision that the commission made not just soon so uh get out of Southgate as well he did talk support yeah yeah I know I spoke to him as well but how does that feel then what does that mean to you it feels good knowing I've got um then behind me obviously the England manager and my club manager backing me 100 it feels good and it gives me a bit of extra strength to make sure when I'm back I'm firing and it gives me that bit of hunger not that I'm lacking it but I feel like the extra boost I feel like okay it's on one on back kind of thing and the club standing by you in such a way has that kind of cemented your loyalty a little bit to Brentford yeah I feel like like I said earlier I
want a manager in a club to like really want me and put their arm around me and I feel like throughout the whole situation have done that you know even even the players as well you know I spoke to loads of them they don't agree with it but it is what it is and and your mum yeah she's that one is like going back to the Tweet when I said when I put that tweet up she's the first person to write me a message me and said listen he doesn't need to do nothing just don't do no more please I've been saying how she's been sick for she feels sick in her stomach for an hour long throughout the whole situation and putting out there she's just thinking it's gonna damage me damage her and damage the family and things like this so I just thought okay let me just do the talk of my feet and when I'm back get get the family well they're not smiling but happy happy again and I'm sure they can't well they can't wait to see the there's some back on the pitch screen goes does she does it mean the most to you to make her happy and to make her feel good all my family yeah I feel like she always just texts me randomly and she's like she was I don't want to bother you sometimes I just check on what I've seen on WhatsApp to wait for you to come online to know your okay and alive and well and that's just that's how my mom is like maybe sometimes like my mum she knows and she does she calls me random times it'd be 12 at night it would be early doors just checking in I was fine I love you so much this and that that's our favorite one checking to see if I'm online on WhatsApp bro with him pestering me in our eyes but so I think making them happy and making them smile as well is what gives me the filter do well the Brentford fanbase yeah strong massive as well yeah where I go I'll get I get love from The
Breakfast fun so [Music] what's your uh you're gonna get back to football and uh you've you I can feel you've got a certain fire inside you yep I think I just not that I need to prove anybody wrong but there's a lot of haters and doubles out there thinking you're gonna be saying that when he comes back actually they're right I'm gonna be a different man and even better than that that guy that scored Them Girls before so how'd you know because Mom I'm built different my mentality is different I'm not one of these I could have been a great player hadn't he done this I'm I'm gonna go beyond that honest like I said not a point to prove but point to proves to myself how would you ensure that happens like what is it that because I think about controllables what is it that you can control to make sure that you come back even an even better player is it just training harder is it what is it that you're it's training harder but in my head every time I step on a pitch I'm thinking in my head I'm gonna score today I'm going to school when a chance comes I'm gonna score because in the game you your bands get a chance that you should be scoring so in my head now thinking right when I do play and I do get that chance that I should be scoring it has to be a goal so it's going to be a goal well if it's not next won't be a goal or if it's not it will be I'll be two goals you know Brentford is a fantastic team I think of all the teams in the Premier League if we talk about admiration I really admire Brighton at the moment but Brentford I absolutely think our brilliant brilliant team really ton of admiration for them um there's a lot of people that are obviously linking you to other clubs and saying oh is he gonna join this Manchester United all of that how do you receive all of that you know all these links to because everyone's looking for a striker Strikers are like
the hardest to find goal scorers in the Premier League you've got Harlan you've got Kane he's gone now now you're technically the second best Striker that's currently in the league on paper so you know these big clubs are going to come knocking they're going to say you know Chelsea's got [ __ ] unlimited money over here united we need a striker how do you receive all of that I mean like from Young and like I said I don't let this all affect me obviously Ariel going on in the background but my job is to keep training well when I get the chance in the games to keep scoring and doing well but I think everybody wants to play at the top of the tree and not that Bradford aren't there but I feel like playing for a big Club fighting for trophies and these kind of things everybody wants to do and if the chance was to come along I think I'd be silly not uh not to look more into it but I feel like yeah and the manager knows that I want to be playing at the highest possible level level possible and whenever that time comes then this would be it but I can't think of my time at brentford's been been good be probably one of the best times in my career and that's a special club like they just got something they got a culture there which is super special so you know that culture you describe will get the best out of you as a player for sure so it's like great talent great culture equals great results it's like one plus one equals three yeah now yeah I like the next Club I go to if I was to move it would be like the rat club when you say the right Club you're not talking about Liverpool are you I heard you're a Liverpool fan yeah a Liverpool fan a Liverpool fan I feel you've been a Liverpool fan your whole life yeah I've been living for my whole life but from Young I liked I've liked Arsenal I like watching Arsenal from how they play and the kind of how passionate fans are but yeah level fan level boy at heart and so Liverpool at heart love how Arsenal play love their style their
anything about Manchester United I like I like Barbershop when he was there okay I liked watching United a lot when both offers it so thank you but we do actually need a striker so I've actually got a contract here that Eric and Richard Arnold would have given me soon imagine now listen I hope you um I I just want to see you back playing again because I think I think it's a it's a gift to the Premier League your talent and also when I look at your story you didn't have a straight line that a lot of people have in football you went up down up down up down up down and you persevered because the talent is you can't argue with it you can't argue with the talent and so this whole gambling section of your life um it's a bit of a blip in there so I heard all you've overcome and you've taken taken your your punishment um you move on from that you admit responsibility yeah yeah um and so now it becomes the backup again about the football yeah like you said the Journey's been it's been wild it's been crazy and if if I was to read a book on myself I'd say this guy's done a lot I've been through a lot and he's still fighting and it's still climbing to the top of the tree like how's he managing with that with everything that's going on what's the goal you know if I if we if we have this conversation again at the end of your career and we sit down here and we go man and you go damn that was a successful career Steve what happened I want to be playing for England and scoring goals I don't want to be I played England a couple times I want to be the main man Wherever I Go and and Finland oh no we got Harry Kane days probably one of the best strikers in the world if not the best so and that's what I'm up against so I need to get to that level so it's just six working hard and keep fighting a little
Euros around the corner as well yeah and that's another it's another place I want to get to which I do believe that in my head I'm right I'm ready to get to you so and at Club level what are your Ambitions there in football um win the win win trophies win some silverware I feel like I feel like I want to play for the highest highest level possible playful with playful Club that's I'm loved that not just one of but I feel like like with all my moves I've not just gone to a club before whatever or money or whatever I've gone it's been the right step for me and I've achieved something every year every year I've just got better and better you wanna win the Premier League one day that's that's the aim that's the M I wanna win the World Cup also on a win trophies that's like wow I'm being from where I'm from Northampton not many people can achieve them things or be like yeah he's been at the World Cup he's won the World Cup yeah I know even then that my mom still lives in the same house really yeah she doesn't want to move she likes being down people will run there be like yeah I have his mom lives there I do that now but it'd be more of achievement and I've won something like that and like yeah I'm his mum's there Ivan comes there all the time I think that's kind of kind of how we are oh I am and you can see like my mom's she doesn't want to move into some big house she feels safe and comfy at the house where she's at and that shows that I have another no choice put to be grounded and you have three kids as well yeah three little boys do you think about them do you think about what the Legacy you want to leave that they're going to grow up and learn about does that cross your mind a lot yeah yeah it does I want to leave Alexi that they don't
have no pressure on their shoulders to walk into I just wanted to whether there is a football or whatever industry they look to go into which obviously I would want to say is football but whatever whatever they do want them to be successful and be like be strong like my chosen I feel like that I'd want them I do want them to have the same upbringing I had like I wouldn't put into that private school under these things because I don't want to just give them everything I wanted to have to work for certain things what advice would you give them about how to how to navigate say they uh they do go into football all three of them and they say they come to you one day they say Dad listen I've just got a call from the biggest club in the world Manchester United and I'm gonna I'm gonna accept it go go to Manchester playing to Eric um I need some advice dad I'm you know I'm on my way tomorrow what advice can you give me Dad how the mentality as you're the best player on the pitch you might not be but having that mentality will help you play Bell and just have the hunger you haven't got the hunger or the drive you'll step behind already I'd say like also attitude is key good I'll get you a long way not just in football or work in life quick one I discovered a product which has changed my life called Eight sleep and I'm so proud to say today that I had a chat with the founder of the brand and they are now a podcast sponsor and one of the things I've come to learn on this podcast from speaking with Sleep Experts like Matthew Walker is how important temperature is when it comes to sleep the temperature of your room the temperature of your bed and also one of the big insights I had from speaking to some experts was that the temperature of the room should fluctuate throughout the night as you move through different stages of sleep so when you first get into bed it should be quite cool in bed it should then get a little bit cooler and then the temperature should increase near the end and that is a reflection of
what would have happened in nature once upon a time you've probably come to learn that I have sponsors on this podcast that I use and products that I love my sponsors should be a reflection of the conversations I'm having but also a reflection of what I'm using in my life so to celebrate them being a new podcast sponsor I always want to get a discount for you guys and I've got one go to a sleep.com which is e i g h t sleep.com slash Stephen and if you do that you'll save a hundred and fifty dollars on the Pod cover that I have on my bed the one I'm talking about grab your pod cover send me a DM and let me know how you get on a quick word on huel as you know they're a sponsor of this podcast and I'm an investor in the company one of the things I've never really explained is how I came to have a relationship with huel one day in the office many years ago a guy walked past called Michael and he was wearing a heeled t-shirt and I was really compelled by the logo I just thought from a design aesthetic point of view it was really interesting and I asked him what that word meant and why he was wearing that T-shirt and he said it's this brand called heal and they make food that is nutritionally complete and very very convenient and has the planet in mind and he the next day dropped off a little bottle of fuel on my desk and from that day onwards I completely got it because I'm someone that cares tremendously about having a nutritionally complete diet but sometimes because of the way my life is that falls by the wayside so if there was a really convenient reliable trustworthy way for me to be nutritionally complete in an affordable way I was all ears especially if it's a way that is conscious of the planet give it a chance give it a shot let me know what you think you know we needed this this tweet the famous tweet I'll speak soon with no filter I understand that I came from a place of anger like a bit defensive whatever mood settles your mom text you you're like okay maybe this is not gonna help the situation there was a lot you wanted to say right you wanted to talk specifically about the allegations you've decided now from what you're saying that it's not worth it for you to like go in and dispute things and say
this that the other's not true but was there anything that you do want to say to like the football Community or just to the world generally as a message when you tweet that like outside of like the stuff where we're like a bit bitter and hurt because everything that's going on and people are attacking you whatever is there anything else you wanted to say because I just want to give you a chance just uh um not really like you said that most of it come from anger and it's kind of like everybody's against me kind of thing but with that it's kind of like I was more worried on people like thinking how I am how I am as a person like what they read and what they hear rather than how I actually am but the the people around me friends family the only people I should be worried about they know how I am why don't it's expensive Bob down the road how I actually am I probably never gonna see him again so it doesn't matter that why am I explaining that why am I going out there to give it like a back and forth like I don't need to do that and it doesn't benefit me it just benefits him and trying to get more reaction from me so like you said it definitely was out of our anger anger kind of moment it's kind of like all right let me say distant let me say that not knowing it's not gonna affect it could it could have so it's not I don't need to try and prove nobody wrong or prove nobody right it's just focus on myself family and do I do best which is playing well and scoring goals speaking with your feet correct I did want to talk to you about one last thing you did a tweet as well about a DM someone sent you yeah um someone had dm'd you calling you a black c word um and you posted the Tweet um subsequently you stopped taking the knee during at the start of Premier League games and such racism and football do you do you still receive racial abuse
um still today yeah you do if I was to post everything I've received that's been racist I'd have easily around 100 messages easy just real off there there there has that increased since the sanctions were made against you from the commission no because I feel like most of it's just been rubbish that I get a lot of people are saying but I feel like most of it's from playing a game and someone's bet on you or you haven't scored and then they come on come for you for like these kind of things or the fantasy league yeah football league that you don't get enough points and they'll come at you like this or your score to lose that but also just things like this why don't you stop taking the knee because I feel like it's it's a certain gesture it's not really it's lost its purpose and like you can see like before games like people like run off without half of the knee forgot about it like the purpose isn't there no more I don't think that's doing nothing in the game to help stop these kind of things from happening more needs to be done for sure for sure 100 all over the world not just in the UK but we obviously saw what happened to veniscus Jr as well in the in the La Liga um and it does does feel like if there was harsher action taken then a lot of this stuff wouldn't be happening even from the platforms and also from the police um you know yeah the most most well some of them are from abroad and it's kind of like it's not in the UK they can't do nothing about it and I'm like okay so what you just keep sending from wherever but yes we can't do nothing it's not it's not us okay so it's fine then basically you're saying it's fine yeah it's like what'd you do yeah I feel like it's lost his purpose personally anyway and I feel like it's kind of like puppets that people at the top were kind
of like let's try this well let's do this keep people quiet for a bit just do that and be trying it's not trying you're counting down the days now yeah that is the um it's like really good at Christmas yeah what kind of day counting down the days or too often trying to be around the boys because like being in football prison at the moment when I rounded boys I think it won't get easier but it'll get a little bit easier but not the same was like you train a whole week hard at the end of the week it's not like and go on a reward you're not playing a match and then is it January you can play yeah January the 17th you can train again I can't play with matches oh you can play matches yes 17 for September I can train so oh September you can train in September I can train yeah okay being a club around the boys okay I say not long yeah not long not long less than a month yeah it feels like ages or and then you can play in January that's going to be a very big game a lot of people are going to be watching that yeah do you feel pressure no I know I I I thrive off pressure when it's like he surely he can't do that he's not gonna be able to do it and that's what the the pressure was I was spoken about after the playoff final I'm gonna go the penalty after the game it was like you must have been scared like if you missed you probably could have like you could probably could have lost it massive I was thinking no I can't wait like I knew four facts I was going up anyway 100 because it was the pressure and like the reward after it gives you a bigger chance to jump into Premier League and more money for family so are you trying to prove people right or trying to prove people wrong what matters more to you uh proving people wrong so I can have a little bigger yeah I like that I like when I see certain certain tweets and
then when I do something I come back to it and just like a little comment and dig at the person and there's just lots of words you're right you win you've been taking names throughout this process just like this pundit said this this person I mean there's loads of pundits I say loads of things it's all opinions but when I come back school enough I'm sure they'll go back into the bush and back pedal on what they say ladies and gentlemen I'm interrupting this broadcast with a very special announcement two years ago I started writing a book based on everything I've learned from doing this podcast and meeting all of the incredible people that have had the privilege of meeting but also from my career in business from running my marketing businesses my software business my investment fund and everything else that I've been doing in business and life and from this I've created a brand new book called The Diary of a CEO the 33 laws for business and life if you want to build something great all become great yourself like the guests that I've sat here and interviewed I ask you please please please read these 33 laws the book I always should have written if you like this podcast this book is for you and it is available now in the description of this podcast below and every single day until it's out later this month one person that pre-orders it that takes a picture of their pre-order uploads it to their story on Instagram or social media and tags me will win a Gold version of this book signed by me and there's only 33 copies of those available so pre-order it now tag me on social media when you do and 33 if you're going to win a very very special book we have a closing tradition on this podcast where the last guest leaves a question for the next guest not knowing who they're going to leave it for sure so they wrote a question for you here in this diary the question been left for you is when have you most had to face your fears Poppy the bun because I think loads of things going through your head it's like
like I said if I'm having football at such a young age not knowing if there's loads of things that God for your head like what how are you going to cope with things like at the time I was kind of like not wary I feel like I'm a confident person but going out in certain places the topic is gonna be about the whole Scandal that's going on people gonna talk about it but I'm with me it's like do they want to talk about it they're thinking do I want to talk about it um not scared in a way but it's kind of like it's an awkward kind of meeting kind of thing but yeah it's an elephant in the room yeah yeah yeah and then it comes to the point where it's like well they'll say something like oh I bet you can't do that and it's kind of like oh that kind of thing but I'm like yeah what's done it's done like you could talk about it then I talk about it then I mean it's cleared so I feel like not knowing what people thinking about you not people not knowing what people want to kind of talk to you not knowing if you're going to be fit when you come back or not knowing what you're going to do you whilst you're off at loads of things going to your head and it's like it hasn't crossed your mind you might like lose your form or something that that actually did yeah it did at the time but like I know I can get myself and go swimming uh positions so I don't feel like that that would be such a big issue but it does cross your mind like whatever the school within the first five games six games you're gonna think that the world's ending kind of thing but yeah I think that was the fear of these kind of things not knowing what's next kind of thing and as the days have passed it's got easier right it's got easy in ways but it's got harder and like oh okay easier than like too long around the boys and that's kind of like my head's fine now I'm at the club doing what I do best and enjoy but then it's kind of like at the end of the week I can't play games whilst uh the game was kind of like
it's like torture watching yeah he's torture like I hate watching games not when I should be on the pitch do you think you deserve the punishment you got um I mean if that's what the rules are then so be it that's the punishment I should have got but yeah looking on the other cases and the fact that they were lower leagues it's kind of like why did he get that and I got this is it because he's there and I'm here but now I feel like if this is a punishment for doing what I've done to make that make sure the next person gets that make sure next person gets that like make it all fair fair and correct what I think it was fair but it is what it is I can't see I can't change nothing now I can't that's not put me focuses on if it's fair or not that isn't help no situations yeah I think it's possible to take responsibility for your actions I did that but also to think that it was unfair because they I think maybe rightly so they are they are making making an example of you because those lower league players that would never send a message would it of course so with the big wages and the big status and the popularity and all the upsides comes this other thing which is like bigger sanctions bigger publicity bigger it's more of a talking point and more and more of a story but and I'll tell you what you go out there and you start bagging goals yeah ain't nobody gonna be talking about oh anything else that's that's another reason I want to be scoring goals so four things right and that people talk about my goal scoring rather than rubbish past I think you I think you're gonna I think you're gonna go back to Brentford and I think you're gonna [ __ ] tear it up um because I sense a real deep Drive in you that I've not seen in many people um a real sense of like self-belief and conviction even what you're saying about the penalties there like I played at soccer Aid and they came over to me and
asked me if I wanted a panel you know I went to the back of the group I swear of that so hard this year I played this year I got injured before the game at Old Trafford but I played in training and we had to do a penalty issue out Potch was the manager and um I just said to myself Steve Stafford and take one and this was to decide who got which dressing room I took one I scored it and then the next day I pulled my pulled my hamstring got the grade three tear but I was proud of myself for stepping up and doing it yeah I think if you have in your head I'm gonna do this you have a better chance of thinking what is this there's no point thinking that I even was yeah back is 100 like it was Strikers I've played with especially strikes I play with now because he's I'll say I'll say his name Brian good because he knows he's like my little brother I said something like when he missed a chance he gets so angry with himself saying bro it's fine you you're not a robot you can miss chances when the next chance comes you'll score and he he's he's got a lot better at that and he's been scoring so I think just don't dwell on things but you've got a big trunk coming up January yes and I hope you score oh I know I I know I know I know I do well and like I said this is just another hard one my bumpy road but it's all good it could be worse Ivan thank you thank you for um thank you for the time thank you for the inspiration you've given me um I feel like I understand you feel like I understand you and listen we all make mistakes in life I think it's really important we've all made mistakes having so many mistakes I think it's yours are obviously more publicly broadcast because of who you are and you're at the top of the game you're the peak of your powers but um I think it's important as you've said that you you take responsibility for it you move on and you let the football do the talking and I think that's exactly exactly what you have done and that's what um I'm really excited to see from you going forward as I said because you're special you've got a very special talent you've
got a very special mentality and a very special talent to match it and uh we can't let that go to waste so we need to it will go to waste for sure some of the people around me they won't allow it to go toys so good thank you so much for your time bro means a lot to me that you um came here and spoke to me and uh I'm a big fan and I really do hope you end up at Manchester United one day thanks for having me thanks thanks it's been good it's been good to talk through things and maybe this can help the next person if there was to think twice on doing side of things or maybe to open up about sort of thing so yes probably it's probably easiest good effects off me like I said quick one you guys know that for years now my office is quite literally been everywhere on a plane in the back of my car in a terminal in an airport or on a train you name it I've probably worked there ever since I started my first business at 19 years old I've been working on the move all I need is Wi-Fi a desk and my headphones and I'm set and one of the places that has always had my back when I'm struggling to find an office is wework I've been using wework for years now whether it's in Manchester London Manhattan or La wework is easy it literally requires no thinking there's no stress of finding the perfect working location wework does it all for you plenty of desk space meeting rooms collaboration spaces drink snacks it's all there so for your next remote working trip away from the office or if you want a new Fresh space to work in then don't just work anywhere wework might just be your answer you can get 25 off your first six months of wework all access by using Code CEO works that's one word CEO works and to redeem this offer visit we.com CEO works [Music] foreign [Music] [Music] foreign