Video URL: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zBqqf7fREPQ
Joe Rogan podcast check it out The Joe Rogan Experience Train by day Joe Rogan podcast by night all day you took heroin yeah yes yes we're up I'm the only one without sunglasses what the [ __ ] it's just easy to hide here alone no sunglasses you got to get them bro they're in my car I'm not going a second pair call one of your goons I just fill the the the place all right give him your your are cool mine are cool look cool in those toor glasses Joe try those oners live in Florida I was in Key West oh yeah with that bald head you [ __ ] bring someone to Justice [ __ ] yeah bro like a bounty on video game [Laughter] B fun times last night boys oh yeah good show we stayed too late it was a little late I got home I've been uh requiring myself to write for at least 1 hour when I get home home finally writing bed till 4 in the morning holy hell so you got home and wrote wrote that's crazy damn it's what you write your best I do it at night sometimes at bars sometimes when I'm uh when I just get off stage. you just get off stage your juices are still flowing sure you can sometimes you it's like every now and you get the one gam out of 10 just one little idea one little spark oh yeah come on [ __ ] get in there it's not Shades yeah like seven different drugs going around whatever allegedly don't be scared of the future what about a a cigar you want a cigar yeah please I'm all right all right no Shane no no Shane in that yep hey don't F Shan there's there's your Shane that it's just like you canceling gigs what no Shane in that tour oh yeah he loves titles I don't like them sir oh gr come up with a name names are tough yeah what about when you have a kid you got to name that thing forever I saw Buffett it was a second win tour a lot of old people Jimmy Buffett second wi tour is a great name second win tour for that it is it made me realize names of Tours are cool he's underrated I'd go the opposite way damn think he's overated about three songs I knew I like mine with lettuce and Tom that's great that's one of them that's all you need dude wasting away again in Margarita yeah pop top come on on stepped on a pop
top what is that my heart what's a pop top uh you know like a convertible he pop a bottle Florida movie but he Steeps on it it's Florida music Ste on he's drunk in his apartment Ste on it's wholesome yeah it's like it's passible can I get the uh circumcision Florida is a good place I was just down there like that's amazing how about it guys let's move to Florida start this over is where you move to when everything goes terrible yeah Key West if like if everything goes bad in Texas you move to Florida if like b o roor becomes Governor he's got a skateboard SL he does I'm sure and everything slides into Oblivion you go to Florida you go to Florida Florida's like The Last Stand before you just move to South America and Key West is the last of Florida yeah exactly before you get a compound in Mexico you go to Florida is the jizz coming out of the dick yep that's it yep it's over right on the bottom I've never been to qest oh rules dud pretty awesome it's an Escape is there a good club there there's a small Club Key West Comedy yeah is it good it's great yeah 90 people you do it I just did it oh no [ __ ] you spend a week there do two shows that's it jet ski jet ski bike everywhere the people there must be just so [ __ ] loose they're devoid of any sort of fashion or or or trying to stick with anybody they're just so I saw three cops in action and all of them were trying to get an old lady from the street to the side walk yeah like you're too drunk at 400 p.m. please ma'am please can you go to the sidewalk you go to you go to Hemingway's house what's Hemingway's house that's pretty neat you see all the cats with thumbs mhm the one has seven great they just have like they how does that happen breeding is it overbreeding breeding them on purpose in breeding oh on top on purpose to make those thumbs Hemingway cats yeah yeah yeah pretty great that's Hemingway's C we touched them pet them no [ __ ] yeah they're everywhere it's pretty fun scary is there like a tour of his house you do yeah awers there and [ __ ] like that kind of deal scary cats look at the hands on that thing crazy yeah it's nuts oh he had a [ __ ] ton of concussions right yeah really yeah and they're like this might have also led to his CT yeah yeah he was
in war he was boxing oh yeah getting knocked out all the time I can't tell CU I always I loved Hemingway but he also seems kind of like a douche I think he believed who he was the Legend part of that that's annoying where he's like I'll fight anybody on this island it's like shut up author we're all just drinking author goite your words words isn't that funny like some guys are intellectuals they feel like they have to do something like that to be legit yeah get knocked out yeah he loved like yeah bull fighting oh yeah you hear that Neil de grass what about Neil de grass he's a wrestler oh yeah yeah he wrestles he was a beast though wasn't he he was a wrestler in high school col yeah yeah he was fit that'd be a bummer to get your ass whooped by Neil to Grass would start talking [ __ ] to him that's that old school barrel chest he looks like he wears a unitard to the beach when men ate mostly oats they look like that oats part of this nutrious breakfast looks like ORS and Wells they all ate oats and grits and [ __ ] but he wanted he got laid quite a bit did he he [ __ ] oh man he [ __ ] everybody getting W every wife he cheated on with his next wife Jesus why Mar trust he's a dummy and after this one's over I probably won't do it again guys get they get all romantic what do you got here get some uh 18-year-old Scotch sir oh too old for me let's go let's go hey thank you you want some don't be a [ __ ] all right to the camera one you're into the that's all we have to do gentlemen I look forward to this more than almost everything hey so much fun hey parks going away hey I do [ __ ] hate Parks oh yeah nothing to protect them we're flying down and already's like you talking about Rosa when we get there there's more parks to be saved no I just wanted to go on a hke no we're flying down he's like when you got what time do you land me and Norman were on the same flight he's like what time do you land let's get in we we'll get a hike in before the show like dude shut the [ __ ] up a hike it's winter New York oh that's right you guys are freezing up there we just sit outside have a cocktail yeah go outside by the lake hang out watch the canoes Roll by
it's beautiful beautiful yeah you want to go Inland into the city yeah I had to buy deodorant you like let's walk by the r then we walk by the river there's [ __ ] just homeless dudes living yeah in the [ __ ] mudu got sinking in I know doesn't it bother you how much Ari loves like nature so annoying well when you live in Manhattan you need it it's like a drug you need to go get your drug I want to walk in the let's go to the park and just sit in the grass shut the [ __ ] up dude got to be in the ground soon with his age got to connect it's right get used to it have you ever seen a coyote in Central Park no I've seen him in La have you they apparently they have in Central Park now what yeah yeah there's all these photos of coyotes in Central Park H they they're a weird animal like as they get persecuted they move out and Branch out their their territory it's like Jews yeah I was going to say it reminds me of something yeah well they were attacked by the wolves the gray wolves and them are not related they're the like the one animal like when they have Kai wolves like when they a coyote and a wolf breed it's always a red wolf so it's an Eastern wolf so the Western wolves the gray wolves the ones that they killed off and then they're bringing them back cuz they're idiots they're bringing them back from Canada like reintroducing wolves letting them out it's such a terrible idea but uh the gry Wolves used to kill the coyotes so the coyotes when the Wolves were killing them they would uh have more babies so the females whenever they do roll call and they scream out in the night if one of them's missing it causes the female to have extra pups no yeah it a great book called coyote America by Dan Flores I had had them on the podcast they're an amazing animal love the roll call you hear it when they get when they get something they all like I just saved my cat from some coyotes really yeah did I ever say this on here lay it on me fatty yeah no I was just sit in my parents house all of a sudden I heard some [ __ ] dogs screaming in the backyard I'd never heard that [ __ ] they were just in my parents' backyard screaming and I went outside and they were like circling my cat to run out there and like pick him up what a [ __ ] I was like out there like get out of here go on get like
screaming at these dogs I watched a coyote jump over my back fence with a chicken in its mouth jumped over my fence it was like you know I guess like a six foot high fence jumped over it like it was nothing like it was nothing just Bing to the top of the fence paus on the top over the fence that's awesome like just let me know like this fence is [ __ ] this fence is doing zero like my dog has zero chance of getting out this just go in and out like it's nothing damn it's wild man why see how AG they're Little Wolves they're wolves that live amongst us they're just a small wolf yeah I didn't know they were in Central Park that's everywhere they're in every single city in the country what do they do burrow wow look someone's roof someone's roof but they're everywhere that's Bushwick so this is only within that's a photosh this is only within the last oh no it's not that's perspective shot that's a perspective yeah that's a roof it's on a roof looking over it's pretty crazy he thought he was on the street it's like a giant wolf about to eat the lady it's a it's on a roof it's a that's I guess that's the same coyote but there's rats Galore out there rats that's snacks all day rats well that's what they do in LA they clean up the rats in La that's you know they they're a reason why we're not infested you think about all the [ __ ] garbage that's on the floor in LA on the streets animals in a city is jarring you see those monkeys yeah they're fun yeah when me and Florida when I was with Stan hope in when I was staying at sopes you know me and him were drinking we'd go around like walking around at night there'd be [ __ ] jaalas everywhere haval neighbor they [ __ ] people up [ __ ] up his neighbors wild pig that's like blind [ __ ] crazy they don't have such good Vision but neither do regular wild pigs oh really yeah they just they operate by smell mostly smell and sound they they don't see very well if you pause like you're sneaking up on one you just pause they just they give up on looking at you and they start eating the ground whoa those boys are running around it's pretty fun I shot one of those in South Texas a couple months ago they tast they turned into chizo hell yeah have havalo Cho yeah little ones are great a they're a weird animal man they're not really a
pig it's it's called a Peery it's like a it's like a cousin to a pig they really look like crazy teeth man their teeth sharpen as they open and close their mouth what do you mean their teeth rub against each other like two blades like sharpening who they're razor sharp teeth it's crazy damn yeah that's what their teeth look like I don't I I hope St hope gets killed by Havalina drunk walking in a dumb suit a real possibility man it's not them it's the cartel Oh no just [ __ ] pig got my suit what the hell I can't reach my cigarette Don't Spill the my tie I was in a safari and a leopard walked by the the Jeep and it went holy [ __ ] and we were like it was salivating like crazy and then 20 seconds later in a bush you hear and he went and [ __ ] it no oh he was in heat yeah [ __ ] it wow that it's a maiden call wow what a weird mating call uh uh uh I've tried it it doesn't work that's the end but Safari is crazy cuz the the Lions will walk right by you [ __ ] and they just know not to eat you did you ever see that video uh of the lady she's trying to take photos from the the car with the windows rolled down and the cat reaches in and grabs her and pulls her out of the car pull it up it's in Africa the lady she's in the the backseat of a car and they tell you to keep your windows rolled up and she just decides to roll it down to take photos and this this lion just pulls her out of the car you saw the one with the Asian guy screaming at his wife she gets out of the car she gets out of the car in [ __ ] Tiger Park to scre and so she gets Jagged she gets grabbed by this [ __ ] tiger and then the the mom comes out to try to save her and the mom gets killed so she Liv and then the husband's like starts to get out like oh n I'm free actually yeah damn he should just push her yeah do we have is that a video a video it's horrible when you see like cats can't help themselves man if they see you outside here it is oh the Tiger in she's like you [ __ ] I [ __ ] told you I saw your DMs I saw [ __ ] so she gets out of the car he's like what are you doing get all the way around to yell at him so she's yelling and other people are stopping and then you realize out of nowhere too late like instantaneously so he runs after it and
then the mom the mom gets out and she's the one who gets killed oh you can't hang so that lady gets killed CU she's trying to protect her child man imagine how you like why did I raise this crazy lady I raised a crazy person who gets out in the [ __ ] car screaming at tigers the lady the only the mom got killed this this one right here she got killed the last one out of the car got killed that's got to be the last way you want to die that's not a great way when they fo off first still alive yeah anal great way to get out of a relationship I'll fight with her in the park with tigers crazy [ __ ] she'll get out of the car she always gets out and then L will run up some people they'll let you know they'll get out in traffic I don't give a [ __ ] this this the people that would just yell at you in tra works I had a girlfriend and fult with me cuz he said if I get out of the car in the rain you would come out and chase me right and I'm like no I'd respect your decision to get out of the car I hate when they do that what do you mean Chas come after me oh that's so I thought you hated me yeah I had that happen when I was 21 I was dating this girl and she got mad she goes let me out of the car I go okay so I pulled over and let her out of the car and she got out of the car and I drove home what the [ __ ] you doing and then she called me the next day she goes why the [ __ ] did you just leave me there I go you told me you wanted to get out of the car I was giving you space I was trying what am I going to do say no don't get out of the car other adult that I'm talking to she was like I was ACH by a tiger what the hell Jo yeah I dropped off from Kenmore Square it was a nice spot uhoh PL Transportation nice area nothing nothing dangerous about it it was just like come on I had to take a train home like a peasant just someone yelling at you like let me out of the car like oh please get out the car please please goodbye bye as soon as you listen then you listen to your own music yeah this is the same girl when I I was in a car accident with her and uh I had a a a wh snake video a wh snake cassette in my car and she made me leave it in the car she's like don't take that what cuz I was taking my stuff to leave she was like you shouldn't be listening to that like she thought White Snake was stupid here I go again on my
own tun she was into like intelligent music she was smarter than me like what I don't know I don't remember crap some [ __ ] some Pixies or some sh some [ __ ] that shows people you're deep some [ __ ] that's emotional I mean look man if you can't appreciate a good [ __ ] wh snake video it's fun doesn't mean it's the only thing you like like you know I like ice cream too I like other stuff I like stuff it's nice to some the stuff I like is dumb I like South Park I like I like South Park Rules [ __ ] rules you see what they just did what they do they went Harry they went at Harry and Megan she's suing and they're trying to sue him it's like don't you're suing South Park oh my God yeah you're just going to empower them to go harder pretty brilliant episode not suing just mad not okay oh they made an official statement that we are angry yeah it say yeah which was exactly it's all nonsense what the episode was oh okay it's exactly what they were making fun of them for they watch it and she's mad but well you know you know what's going on someone wanted a lot of attention and now they got it that was the whole episode that was the app like we want privacy and they keep going on every magazine privacy tour yeah the Babylon B went after him too for that it's just I love they just couldn't picture it we just want to be regular people and they're like wait no job no way yeah go work at supermarket pretend regular people be a regular person go get a job in an office that would be an intense level of white Guild if they just start [ __ ] I'm British royalty yeah damn we did some bad stuff she's half black and then the wife convinces you to leave the royal family like I'm out I don't need you guys which is crazy cuz don't you just get free money give me my all what do you get when you're a royal you get a stiping you get a you get a sure it's a want yeah what about the count assist do they get do they get paid like less all of them that's a good question right like what's the chart how far down do you go before you're like you don't get a check what do you think you get if you're a prince what do you think a prince gets oh it's all je and rues I bet publicly their salar is nothing but they show but then you know
they [ __ ] some they do get paid something though right yeah they show I saw one episode of that dumb Crown show and that it was the queen bitching about how her [ __ ] private yacht is too old and they're going to have to do Renovations turn this the [ __ ] off why you care about this I got a fight with my girlfriend about that show I was watching I started saying up the Roth the whole time I was like I'm [ __ ] Irish [ __ ] these people and she made me get a 23 of me she was like you're not even Irish I just did it yesterday before I flew down here I put on Brave heart I was like look at this [ __ ] dude [ __ ] the British there you go yeah there's still tension there really they ha the Mi definitely I remember when I went to Belfast you know you go to Northern Ireland and they still have cars that are set up to for bombs what do you mean they had bombproof cars they had cars that were like the entire car was covered in metal like they had this huge bumper system set up it was like their cars for bombs they're like they because they might have to deal with the IRA like this is not that long ago I was there like 20 is somewhere in the 2000s like 2005 2006 or something like that we were over there so like even back then they had these these cars that were armored I like this is wild and you know when you talk to people and they talk to you about like the hores that they had the war between the Protestants and the Catholics like such a weird one gives a [ __ ] the same exact people mov Co coming through but it just shows you people can other people so easy but they're gross they got other pretty hard by the British othered pretty [ __ ] like your religion's illegal your music illegal everything reckles no more chales no more leprechauns [ __ ] that that's our whole cult we need those [ __ ] Le Keers donating guns well the Irish are fun because they don't get offended they're one of the last group I mean look at the Notre Dame guy it's a drunk [ __ ] with a hcock drunk about it pedophile is all you want they have to just take it I have like five cousins with that tattoo there you go exactly everyone has the note a the Clover hell yeah oh yeah yeah isn't
it funny because you never see like a Native American with the chief's tattoo yeah that's true look at that guy that's [ __ ] look at how offensive is hey I to [ __ ] fight you I had a conversation with a guy at a bar in belf he's speaking he's got his face you called me gay when you're when you're in Belfast they barely speak English like you barely can understand what they're saying and this guy all all he was saying to me we're just we were both hammered he's like I'll fight any man that's all he kept saying I'll fight any man [ __ ] chocol whoever it is I'll fight any man I go I believe you bro let's do another shot we were getting blasted they they go hard they go hard do not keep up Guinness and shots oh yeah then the Scottish even the British they all go so [ __ ] hard they go so hard British go hard on drug they love cocaine they love Coke they love Molly they get the they don't have to deal with the fentanyl [ __ ] like we do apparently over there is that Dyan apparently over there like even like a lot of the Royals are partying like a lot of their politicians party like everybody knows like Boris what's his name the guy that's out now carof that guy the vampire what's his name I have no Johns look that guy parted that was like the thing about him was that he parted that's how they Ed the co lockdowns they caught him in massive party party goes you're right everybody party he looks H over all the time his hair is all [ __ ] up he looks like Jeff and D I think he's having a good time he's out there having a good time our Pet's heads are falling off give me the what happened to him he's not think he's still around I don't know but he's not their guy anymore he's not I have no idea what the [ __ ] then they have a new lady and she quit quick she took the job for like six weeks and quit is that UK yeah when we were over there was happening right when we were over there the lady had just quit she was uh whatever they are they're queen king funny hearing about their politics and you're like I don't care at all about anything I don't know of it I your party system they care so much about us they love us yeah well we're the weirdos that have the bombs that we've launched but we're the reality TV of news for sure oh yeah yeah yeah Kardashian the kany I
mean we got the best stuff oh yeah we got the most stuff yeah we're we're the wildest to follow the musk yeah and it's also we have like free speech we a lot of weird [ __ ] over here everybody has guns very interesting if you were looking at us from another country's perspective you're like what a [ __ ] crazy place they Free Speech they all have guns mental illness so much mental illness they celebrate lot of PHA drugs so many homeless people we made it seem cool but what percentage of celebrities come out of America worldwide it's a [ __ ] got to be a giant number yeah and if they don't they come here like all the Canadian funny people come here there's like three Chinese stars that ever got known here well that k-pop's huge K-pop yeah they're huge over there but like Jackie Chan Bruce Le ja exactly who else I don't know Dr Ken y Ming who who else Dr Ken no but the pandas they're all China pandas Bobby Lee uh who else you know China leases us pandas they lease them those are leased to us we don't own those they call those back if they want yeah and if we have a panda on our soil they get it wow wab that's how it starts balloons yeah they got bys interes I think we pay them a million a year each wow interesting they're not I wonder how that really works after change of policy in 84 pandas were leased instead of gifted interesting wow at least at least we should [ __ ] kill him pandas send a m pandas and be like all right we're done back we relased it but it's damaged we're not paying the deposit you guys want to get my kids hooked on Tik Tok I'll show you what the [ __ ] I do to pandas [ __ ] these pandas boom right in the face we got a hostage yeah yeah they [ __ ] up giving us yeah if there's an animal that represents America it's funny that it's an eagle cuz Eagles are it's kind of a [ __ ] Hess evil creature that likes to you know eat dead fish you seen eag look straight on in the eyes they're just like straightforward they're just dorks they don't look Regal at all IDI flying reptiles Franklin was right dude we should have had the turkey heed he want right and they're everywhere that would have been sick didn't it used to be a
dog I think at one point in time it was the dog it was like a pitbull that would have been awesome cool P would have been really sick wasn't is that true that America's national animal a pit bull at one point in time I don't think so it's just the rapper I feel like there's yeah it was just in Harlem yeah it depends where yeah that guy goes down some conspiracy rabbit holes you ever hear Pitbull no yeah he goes down some conspiracy rabbit holes those dudes just grew up in Cuba the guys that come from Cuba they don't want to hear any [ __ ] socialism [ __ ] shut the [ __ ] up all this yeah all those people that came out of those like Eastern block countries that have experienced like actual real communism like shut the like you talk to Christina pizitz about it she's like shut the [ __ ] up like like people whose family came from that part of the world where communism was real and it ruined everything and killed everybody they're like hey you [ __ ] idiots you have no idea what you're calling for what you're asking for and what the history this is worldwide yeah like zero success stories zero they're all convinced they're going to do it right not only not a success story but like horrific hor the worst things possible yeah starve to death like people eating their children no accountability the government elects the government mhm it's my favorite part of Chernobyl is when they're like I love how like the Soviet Union handled like disasters and like there's a guy they bring all the people in the town in and this guy's like look everything's under control and one guy in the town's like why is the air glowing and they're like get him the [ __ ] out of here the guy's like everything's fine throws up BL what is going on in East Palestine right now I think we might be getting hit with it yeah I mean that do you see videos of people throwing rocks into the water just to see the oil slicks that pull up really cuz they're saying that you know it only went a a certain distance away from the actual spill site people are way far away and they're experiencing dead animals dead birds dead pets and then people are thrown rocks into rivers and you see these big huge like chemical circles where the where the water gets Disturbed like it just like oil slicks
it looks really [ __ ] dead fish everywhere I think Pete's got it well he's definitely the most qualified job guy for the job so yeah I mean he's definitely uh not there for any other reason other than he's amazing is there yeah are you alluding to something I'm just saying he's amazing he's amazing he's doing a great job great job yeah is there a party AR as a Jew that's like yeah [ __ ] Palestine dude legit a little bit when I started read my I was like wait what here we go yeah yeah right away your hackles are up like like oil still who gave the Palestinians oil and a bunch of trains broke oh yeah you guys hate [ __ ] trains we hate trains good call yeah sabotage of trains that's got to be they keep every [ __ ] day there's like some new explosion in a factory now yeah it's like am I just noticing it is it the effect of like the news is just showing it to you things happen all the time global warming but Jamie hit me with a Jamie tell me that say that weird one you said man bothering me oakd O oid Boys uranium plant on fire right now today it says no injuries but uranium sound good at all uh what's his name told me a weird one last night he was like the two the main food sources in the entire world is ukra in the the Midwest really he's like now there's a chemical [ __ ] spill in the midwest sometimes when I see a lot of stories about the same thing chemical spill nuclear stuff it's like oh I feel like they're prepping us for some level of like Hey we're going to change the laws on this and we're just getting everybody ready like gun control scary right pushing every shooting at a Seattle bar they started telling you about all of them like oh they're coming with something that could be it could be something well there's definitely been times in history where they've done things like that like where they've blown things up on purpose just to Hitler burnt the rag Nero burnt Rome like they do they do false Flags to get people to like panic and then they create new laws to clamp down on them that's a real like standard practice that dictators use I don't know but they would never use that here in America all right yeah we're better that's like why all the [ __ ]
checks and balances are in place in the way the government is run like to prevent that kind of [ __ ] from happening because it happens everywhere people get into power so you have to have like people like well if the Republicans can control the house like now there has to be fighting everybody has to fight if they're not fighting they would be it would be way worse if they were all in agreement on fing terrible for all of us CU they would eventually laws that would give them more and more power it would be worse well that was the point of the Second Amendment yeah was just hey we need the guns in case the government comes at us it's funny that people don't want to believe that it's it's just pay attention to the rest of the world whenever something happens and people have to be locked in their homes like they comply people comply everywhere else but here over here they're like yeah I don't like you telling me what to go to the beach why can't I get in the ocean shut the [ __ ] up you don't you can't tell me what to do this is crazy isn't it from sea to shining sea mountains yeah they sanded over all the skate parks during Co the basketball that was wild so sad but it's just so bizarre how quickly shifted someone can make a song about that have you ever watch that guy talk what do you think Bob Lazar yeah yeah I've seen him what do you think I don't know when he says he saw that alien that one time that kind of bothered me he didn't say he saw an alien he said he saw something that was in a chair and then these men were facing it it was smaller than that I think I think he seems like he's telling the truth s Mex the way he's described it is like he was it could have been a doll I don't know what it was it could have been they were trying to figure out what size these things are he goes I'm literally walking by looking at something in a 12 by8 window it happens you know I don't know we shouldn't talk about it until something happens it feels like just a lot of jerk a lot of jerking I got a police called on me on New Year's we do this Ecuador thing where you take an effigy like put like straw and like a shirt and jeans and you
light it on fire jump over what what yeah we were doing it's just an Ecuadorian tradition we doing that were you in Ecuador when this happen in Staten Island oh yeah trying to be International they called the cops on us they were like they were like we got to report somebody's burning a body alive body siiz thing that's on fire with hat on it that's what they used to do at Bohemian Grove what when they would go to mik the owl God when all the [ __ ] Elites like [ __ ] Nixon and Ford and Reagan they would go to this Bohemian Grove and one of the things they would do is they would burn this Effigy That was supposed to represent a body they were all dressed like d Druids and [ __ ] in front of this's video of it Alex Jones got video for Nixon called it gay he said it's the faggiest thing ever se he was talking about how the people behave there and apparently these guys would go there and just [ __ ] each other just go and it was in Northern California which is you know there's a lot of gay folk up in that region of the world and so this place was their spot where all these Elites would go and they would party that's so great P up like gold yeah go pull up Nixon's account of Bohemian Grove where's the lighter who's got the lighter Ari Nixon's phone calls are fun lot of nword really oh it's full of Michael Richards wow there it is so he's talking about it ni and tape discuss homosexuals San Francisco just gone clear it isn't it isn't just the r part of but the upper class in San Francis is that way gr that I attend time to time the e the come but it is [Laughter] the that San Francisco grow goes there terrible I mean they Shake don't shake hands with anybody from San Francisco I mean I won't shake hands anybody like my dad but that that place that they would go to they would all dress up like they were Druids there's video footage of it it's the craziest thing ever John R John Ronson and Alex Jones snuck in in like yeah yeah it was like 2000 it was a long ass time ago prove it [ __ ] this is what this is what it looks like there's a giant owl god statue and they burn this Effigy in front of the giant owl God that's supposed to be representative of a
sacrifice the original burning person I mean just go to ep's Island this point at least you get L take a flight how more it could just be these two places there's probably probably a shitload of those places we don't know about yet the eyes wi shut places definitely yeah I mean when did we learn about ep's Island I found out I I heard about it like years I heard about it from Alex Jones 10 years ago long time ago I thought that's the craziest thing I've ever heard there's a place where they take politicians and movie stars and they compromise them with underage girls really an island island about that said he got invited party early on like in stand up and there was like it somebody's house in the in the hills and it was like all the top level celebr like Leo and like everyone like that yeah and then some guy was like do you want to go in he goes no cuz if they asked me to get in the tub with them I'm going to I want to go down this road Jeffrey Epstein was accused of SE trafficking sex trafficking young girls on his mysterious Private Island over 40 years ago a different millionaire escaped Justice in a stunningly similar case it's probably how they've always done it oh yeah if you just think about it if you want to get these world leaders on your side the best way is to compromise them have a bunch of dirt on them right and then getting Vegas does that right videotapes [ __ ] senators and like getting hookers do they and just like we have you when it was the old mob oh the mob Vegas I got stop playing Vegas of course the old the old Vegas back when they were running it dirty yeah cameras and the internet cell phone cameras ruined a lot of fun and you know the internet with the yeah I think about it every time I whack off what do you mean someone's watching man if this camera catches my fat face I can ruin you with that face and it knows what you're Googling too oh yeah how long before there's zero privacy how long before anyone could look at anybody's phone and all information just they can't stop it technology just reached this point where all data and all numbers just available to everybody at every time for this to get out no privacy everybody knows where you're going to be you can't lie Could
Happen yeah can avoid people oh so sorry my mother-in-law is in town really I see her I see her pin got go go glasses say you're lying able to see like their temperature and yeah you know some people uh when they're in relationships they'll turn their location services on so they they significant other can track them wherever they are friends that do that really yeah I was like dude you got to never you got to stop that's terrifying the owner of the um Omaha Funny Bone does that with her kids one thing with your kids but with when you're doing it with your wife or you're doing it with your or you know it's just seems crazy well it's just such a lack of trust yeah it's just very weird you're you're following where they are all the time that would make me not want to be with someone they were like what are you doing where are you like well this isn't fun just [ __ ] Clinging On to me some people want that kind of relationship they want someone like controlling them yeah they want a parent again like they had a parent and then they want a parent again if you put it that way I kind of like it a dominating woman Yeah clean your room be like I don't want topling Xbox you want your dick suck spank my flat ass do you want your dick sucked or not clean your [ __ ] room o I like that make me suck your high heel what e all the [ __ ] things she stepped in yeah come on bro yuck bacteria on that I do do the old fish hook on the lady and I'm just thinking about the subway pole and whatnot you fish hook your lady when you you wash your hands from behind Jesus fish hook weird like a dinner and [ __ ] I'm going to order the salmon yeah can I get that old flamer he's got it people R into weird [ __ ] oh yeah they really are choking and I'm not good with the dirty talk I'm afraid I'm in I've never even tried dirty Talk's insane this voice and the comedic rhythm part of the problem is we're Comics so we know how ridiculous it is what a [ __ ] you 30 oh you're a [ __ ] you call that a [ __ ] you fat skank yeah good nice [ __ ] you drunk [ __ ] some people like put on wigs and they play J F some people pretend to be like the UPS driver delivering a package yeah that's put that's
alarming [ __ ] yeah then you're out Town [ __ ] thing happen yeah why' you use my name as the same guy as yeah what the [ __ ] Tim Tim is the actual UPS dver no we're not doing that want to [ __ ] me Tim the guy it's a fantasy baby I call you Tim I don't yeah I never I don't think I've I've never been with a woman that was into like any role playing or any like fantasy I feel an idiot dirty talk yeah you feel like it's current H not the role playing but I would feel stupid dressing up as a bus boy oh my God imagine if that was like a thing we have to keep this fresh yeah yeah lingerie is [ __ ] like for sure a full costume very I don't mind it I don't mind it it looks hot although it they just take it off right away take it off right away right she has to take it off too yeah i' like to role play with my lady having some money I that's the role play that's a weird role that that kind of relate when the lady has all the cash that's that's a good role play yeah that's hot hey thanks for paying the rent again exactly this wild world up this check this is hot remember when I bought dinner last night that was [ __ ] crazy I was I bought I paid for dinner and I was laying in bed last night and I was like that's it though once you pay for dinner it's like literally a 5 minute period where people are like thanks oh thanks man that PR nothing the only good thing like I'm just going to keep bringing it up you don't have to pay for the next the next day like that was expensive dinner that was nice I did that the pork chop but you're good for the next few cuz you got that one that's the thing you get we see now with you two cheap [ __ ] I would have pay for never this is crazy this guy's the Bruce Lee you guys are unbelievable you're cheap as [ __ ] dude Mark's cheaper than Mark's like uh got take it I can't waste [ __ ] yeah we got a you know a little stiping with the old hotel thank you and I got I'm G to eat all of it I'm going to get [ __ ] to go bring on the plane yeah it's crazy I can't let it go it's crazy I get it all right I get it no but if there's like gr stays in your head oh yeah I got a pocket full of Hotel soap no this is not growing up poor this is crazy [ __ ] Hotel soap is where I draw
the line you little soaps Hotel soap take take a hotel soap I bring my own I'm bring my own soap you bring your own soap what sometimes yeah lava no defense soap I I wear a special kind of soap it's like a a soap that's designed for Grapplers keeps you from getting smell me smell good right smell good smell hot tea tree oil eucalyptus and [ __ ] it's a special kind of soap that uh prevents you from getting like um like uh you can get like staff infections and ring worm and [ __ ] like that it helps protect you from that okay you don't want to rub away all your natural oil natural oils it's got all kinds of good natural oils it's a natural soap smells good too I like it and you know like there's certain stuff like certain soaps you're getting a lot of perfumes you know those perfumes will [ __ ] with your skin hot tell soap bars that kind of dry your skin out sometimes Big Dry I'm ashy but you take them home not as ashy as his grandparents oh Jesus christed it I don't like that T mark like that talk and I'm not a part of it what would happen again possible to avoid can't stop himself free palestin can't stop he can't stop himself fre Palestine yeah I mean how does this [ __ ] play out this pal you know they weren't even going to give him FEMA money until Trump decided to go down there really I'm sure they would say that's misinformation and propaganda but they had denied them I heard the there's also the other side where the governor was like I'm denying it I think he's a republican governor why would he is that true maybe it's maybe we're wrong sides maybe the reason why is because they want liability from the company and the company to pay for everything maybe it's that we apparently the railroad that they were transporting those chemicals on was not set up for hazardous materials they're trying to cut already it's early come on man it's okay start go ahead PE this is bad it's okay buddy don't let [ __ ] with you got those fresh sunglasses on man be a boss go out there and piss you look like a police drawing of a pedophile look at this what do he look like it made me make it you hear the noise I made like the pills I'm always just happy when AR's going to the actual restroom I'm always
happy when he leaves yeah may I keep them coming there I think I think it's I think this episode Mark gets [ __ ] up Mark's under the radar every episode he's already ready to roll yeah he TOs Holocaust J he making ashy jokes oh yeahoo the Jews had a good they had a good time night like I mean they the Kanye I think people propped up the Jews for a second oh yeah the special did well we had to pretend to like it was what a perfect timing for his special beautiful I mean it was like the like a cultural moment like the universe gave him a window whoop go right here go right through it was like Ronnie Chang with stop Asian hate that helped him well he was around before the stop Asian hate but that really did it oh yeah yeah he's funny too he is funny he's really funny he's a very good comic but he was he was uh before stop Asian hate his big special came out that was like great that was like in the Netflix special 2016 17 17 yeah cool guy too great guy good [ __ ] dude good EG funny [ __ ] yeah nice I like when we do that it feels weird without Ari doesn't it feels good I love it less anxiety in the room God when he's [ __ ] hitting you with the let's go hiking let's [ __ ] what do you think that's all about I don't think he even likes it I think he likes saying he likes hiking he likes nature I like what he saying that's what bothers me that's what annoys me he's like I got to leave the country like don't like the [ __ ] country you like saying you left the country o that's a me being an [ __ ] cuz very close friend that might be you might be on I'm going to say it to his face he goes to China for a year [ __ ] there something about what you're saying it's resonating with me it's like getting in a cold PL you know it's like you can only do it for so long you pretend you like it well you got to make it your personality if you cold plunge everybody goes all in it's like yoga or vegan diets yoga keep talking about it we get it huberman what's Trump doing uh oh he's he was at Palestine today on of course he was look at him look at all those guys in the background who do you think that guy with the mustache is voting for it ain't Biden it ain't look him it's a costume it's like a Guess Who character look at
that mustache that guy's got a lot of guns damn look at all those guys they all look the same even the woman looks the same [ __ ] lunch lady she got bitter be what he saying I just finished I go back there's their leader who's that guy just the normal dude like our leader the most handsome man in the world but Biden made it I want to thank those of uh you that helped John roor who's fantastic Blue Line moving uh is John here hello John good job got a lot of trucks coming up with water right that's fantastic guy friend of my son Don who's also here where is Don good job did you get him to do that I think so I it was a 95% voter rate for Trump in fantastic he helps thank you very much John appreciate it what Two Fellas moving company and pull it up he's helping swing he's giving shout outs he's giving shout outs to all the people that delivered water the new the the Maga hats with the giant font is so [ __ ] funny they went even harder dude when I went I think I told you when I was in Mara Lago every dude there was wearing a flat brim that said m a g like a bedazzled Maga hat oh my God [ __ ] crazy what is Mara Lago like so sick I tried to pretend I was like as soon as I got in there I was like yo this is it this is really you can tour it no oh I got in somebody I knew there worked with the trumps wow they came to my show and they that we got drunk and they're like do you want to come to Mar Lago I was like yeah I thought they were full [ __ ] the next day they're like all right we'll pick you up you got to go past like armed guards they like we got to get this guy on the list but yeah then you get in there it's a bunch of old billionaires like dudes is it a country club or is it just small it's very small it's very small there's like one Spa there's that big room that and he lives there yeah he lives in like a wing which is so wild he lives in in a place where people can visit and then everyone sits in that like Patio Restaurant area and they're like he might come out today oh oh my God he might come out today that room and everybody look how beautiful solid gold Constitution old rich people money that's pretty that's a beautiful place welcome to Mar Lago the
crown jewel of Palm Beach it's got to be a golf course no no golf course Palm Beach is close to wow look at that wow close to West Palm right we should have a show there it is yeah it is I thought the Mellow Mushroom we should do a show mar we were talking about doing protect our Parks if Trump just said us up a studio yeah doing it down there don't even say we're there he would do it just a bunch of palm trees behind us just just doing it yeah we didn't to tell anybody we're there a baby being lit away from sacrifice just we'll event occasionally you know talk about Florida Florida's great dude we had a great meal last night where the [ __ ] are you it was something about I forget what it is he had like a giant flag in the front of it and there was like laws saying your flag couldn't be that tall so he elevated the land w like a hill to put the flag on Amer about loopholes this crazy he's a big loophole guy yeah you tell him you can't have a flag High shut the [ __ ] up he's like so what is the stick itself is it stopping planes like what are we doing maybe is it that big yeah everyone I mean in that area everyone loves that guy look at it yeah you had to elevate the ground oh smart move it is a good move it's a good hack it was weird though it was very uncomfortable in what way just seeing rich people weird dudes wearing a Maga hat guys a lot with like a Blazer and like a oh that it's a weird combination of like formal dress and baseball hat just a ridiculous a ridiculous no one's ever done that before Trump like in terms of like a politician like when he was on television he had a bad hair day just slap on the old Maga hat right what are you going to do yeah you never saw a Reagan in a hat a baseball hat if he was in a hat it probably be like a like a cowboy hat let it slide be a cowboy yeah he's pretending like George W do oh yeah a lotor from Connecticut Maine yeah they're from Maine kind of bunkport they're from [ __ ] Maine there Reagan with a cowboy hat there go yeah he Rock oh Trump dog [ __ ] cowboy hat no neck hey had a cowboy out they all rock that finger stinks hey just for all tourist or whatever it's just every time they to Texas dress like Tony I look like you re it's funny old there I don't know
anything but I've been watching I dude on the plane I was watching the [ __ ] I've been watching the Kem Burns Vietnam heavy stuff God damn dude I cried on the plane like a [ __ ] idiot oh is that why you watching PBS talk of meat Mark if you're going to say nasty Stu that's pretty funny that was a nice ride though I can remember when the Vietnam War ended really yeah I was a little kid I was living in San Francisco and I remember thinking thank God we're never going to do War again thank God it's over while I'm a child I remember thinking that yeah boy they glad they figured this out that was long it was so years dude from day one they were like we're not going to win yeah from day one they just had to be there m is in there with LBJ like this isn't going this is never going to work yeah and they just kept doing it a lot of heroin out there oh my God I mean they had to be a part of what was going was drinking on the plane and I like while watching this I like drunk texted my uncle who got wounded in Vietnam I was like where'd you get hurt like a crazy text to send oh my God and then he explained how he got hurt and it was like whoa I went to the how did he he was a he he was a forward Observer for his group it was the Battle of [ __ ] I'll find it but uh it was 200 US soldiers surrounded by about 3,000 via Kong oh or rvn and then uh he was the Ford Observer that was calling in coordinates so they were all trying to get him he they got him they hit him with an RPG eventually but he was he was the one up front calling the gunships calling the artillery where to go wow like a spotter and crew there he is right I'm just asking Dr Valley incident 1965 Google Gillis Vietnam his last name is not Gillis ah what's crazy is the Vietnamese don't even hate Americans no they hate the Chinese way more that sh all past them they called the the American war and not the uh it was uh the Battle of Hill 102 AKA The Battle of Kon Valley 65 Americans killed 200 Americans surrounded by 2,000 but then I was I'm a little buzzed I'm asking him [ __ ] up questions like what's it like what's it like broadest question he said what happens is you enter a Zone where you just shut down your emotions and focus on what you need
to do to survive and protect your men no time to process feelings there's enormous chaos but you were acutely aware of everything at least that was my experience wow he this is a wild response yeah he said at one point there were waves of MVA running towards us but my sole Focus was to stop them from getting too close with a gunship known as spooky I mowed them down as they Advanced without the Relentless stream of fire from spooky we would have been overrun thank God for spooky damn wow gunship fired to this area and [ __ ] light I was talking he said I was the forward Observer so my job was to keep artillery jet strikes and gunship fire raining down on the enemy does he want you reading this on air he'll be all right that's why they were trying to get through me and take me out which they eventually did but I took a lot of them out first like [ __ ] drinking watching the documentary on my phone like damn smoking a joint with that guy on a porch we'll tell you he's my my other uncle's in Vietnam and was like uh it's the gunship there it is spooky wow my other uncle was in Vietnam and he never talks about it yeah that guy if you ask he's they down spooky look at that ouch 1968 February 15th nine killed in Downing of spooky gunship to The Spook to the spooky spooky chair spooky wow a well at least he's still with us what a [ __ ] up war that was I think sora's Dad was a nom was it a terrible [ __ ] dumb War silly waste of time not only a dumb War but a dumb war that was that came about because of a false flag tonin yeah golf of tonen they they lied about an incident to try to get us into the war yeah it's [ __ ] C that's like what we're talking about before with false they really happen they used to do them all the time what' you say here it's like that's that's they did yeah they 100% would lesser known fact to JY Morrison's father Captain George stepan Morrison com commanded the carrier division during the Gul of tonin incident CIA the GOL of tonen in incident famously gave the Johnson Administration the justification they needed to escalate the Vietnam War JRR tonin wow it's his dad imagine that and your dad becomes Break On Through To The Other Side I know that's why he went so counter cultur your son rather becomes
that making music they're playing in the [ __ ] helicopters Day Day great music great the 60s was the best music wow yeah they got the music they had a lot of [ __ ] to time they grew up a lot of [ __ ] to deal with and a lot of drugs the the like the drop off is so Stark the difference between music and and automobile design like once they illegal make drugs illegal like American Automobile design turned into dog [ __ ] oh yeah straight dog [ __ ] probably about 73 went down no before then it was literally like the 71 model year is the last good year for muscle cars and only for only for barracudas and Challengers bar for by by the time they got to Camaro 71 they were already [ __ ] Mustang became in the ' 80s became just a dumb hatchback terrible piece of [ __ ] car at all musly yeah but back in the 60s they were the most magnificent cars of all time like those guys nailed and a half mon they nailed it 69 but then once the U schedule One Drug Act happened in 1970 so you got to realize in 1970 they're already making the 1971 model right so you got the 1971 which is like the last Good Year everything else is dog [ __ ] but how do you explain Europe cuz Europe cars look great in the' 60s and suck in the 70s and they didn't have a a Vietnam well some of the best Porsches like 73 74 they had some amazing Porsches that's true then the the little 911 that they made back then was so light you got 91 200 I got a beamer he's got that beautiful little Beamer the 2002 pull it up oh my God it's a great little car that's 73 but that's that's car Beamer that's such a zippy little car oh it's a go-kart it's little box my God yeah you're you're scooting around and like it's almost like like a smart car so small yeah four uh four cylinder engine it's so light yeah that's a great great old car man there's a someone was going to do those cars and put uh modern uh M2 engines in them I know we've looked at this I think we have I think every episode [ __ ] beautiful and then I go I have a Chevy Cruise and then you go let's get let's get you a cool car you need a cool car then I go Chevy Cruz is cool oh you're right yeah but it's not real then what about R Kelly we bring up R Kelly we are redundant as [ __ ] I'll bring up Kanye and cut it out Kanye no this time we
don't have to cut it out dude he's back rules back we're with Adidas he's back again we got a Jew here he was fine for like two weeks people like let's move on can I get that lighter that's true but he's still removed from all social media isn't he he'll be back think self imposed yeah really yeah I think his company's like hey dude just chill out for a minute he seems like a tough hang you had him on here was he kind of a kind of nightmare he's you know he's mentally ill genius sure he can spew out he can rant for hours it's like having a conversation with him like dial him into a conversation is like a a volley a back and forth volley is kind of difficult yeah he just wants a ramp it does sound like he would just be like how's the barbecue here right nothing say I'm Walt Disney oh interesting ex I'm Ford I'm Steve Jobs yeah exactly like all right H to the iso was pretty good right that was pretty awesome yeah all day cold Digger yeah look got amazing songs black skin head is one of the greatest [ __ ] opening beats of any song ever yeah that power that allowed him to like create that kind of music is also like what [ __ ] him up with like rants yeah he winds up saying them things that are not really that thought out you got that right what's that like I think he's funny the way he like dances around it do you think um like the the Adidas thing is the wildest [ __ ] ever he'll be back everybody cut ties with him you think they'll be back with him wait isn't Jamie isn't that going on I heard they're already back Kan and Adidas are back on according to the internet what who crazy there been rumors online that kanyas partnership could be back on is flat according to the internet yeah lesson two weeks ago was revealed the German Sports where label could lose up to $1 billion in Revenue as a result of the split according to the industry an analysts gauging leftover stock rumors are now suggesting that it all is not lost between the pair these Rumblings are coming from Ardent Yeezy fans wishing for their faves to reunite not from ye or Adidas themselves a [ __ ] that that's not real it's got to feel good for the Jewish the Jewish Community to be like n what these Germans are losing a [ __ ] billion dollars the wrong Source but got you in the end got was
crazy like he was out got you guys were started by Nazis like literally I lost a job over a a [ __ ] some racist tweet a long time ago about IBM they were like he you can't do an IBM commercial and I'm like you made remember what you guys did you made processing to let the Jews get processed faster but that's why they can't have any more that was the last straw yeah e enough they said what was the Tweet um here we go it was I bet it wasn't funny yeah wouldn't hold up would hold up now what's wrong with that this was 10 years IBM was right [Laughter] what is that what you spazzing throwing [ __ ] what do you got whipits yeah oh you sick whipit what are you talking about did you really bring whipits some whip son of a [ __ ] those give you brain damage you don't need that in your life not doing a whip it you're going to do whippets what are you 12 I used to do whipits when I worked at Newport crey when I work at an ice cream store thing yeah we did I didn't like it just it just gives you a headache not really great radio surprise though I came out of and I heard somebody go uh one for 10 3 for 20 you have machines look you have little gauges and [ __ ] where do you buy this any what wrong with you what if it explodes what if it explodes Compressed Gas what if that explodes and you lose your fingers oh you're going to do it out of a so exited doing a whip it dude why are you excited about this I'm happy he's doing I'm not why don't you just suck on it why do you have to use theall by and he saw us on the stoop right be by the cell he goes are you like the older Comics he goes are you guys doing whippets on a stoop yeah I'll take a tell me what the whipits do it just makes everything giggly for a minute but doesn't it give you brain damage for like 30 seconds does it Google does whipits give you brain do that while you're doing drugs no no definitely do it do it after he does it I need to know because I'm I'm considering doing it oh you should do definitely well I need to know if it gives you brain Dam give you easy big fella don't do a whip no you need a to take the edge off I know that's what I'm saying right yeah this is a cold Plunge in one I I take it back I take it back please do a whip it let's go yeah might
not be is this legal no you get him head shot no no you're going to forget how to play pool okay do whipits kill brain cells researchers made clear that whippits can deprive the heart and brain of much needed oxygen [ __ ] it yeah oh all right temporarily is everything what if you're into choke sex ah exactly whoa he did it the whole thing he's going to faint what's it doing to you would it be great if he was hilarious like it turned him funny what is it doing to you no lie headed as [ __ ] this is got to be a Guinness record for the oldest Jew to do a whip it absolutely can you describe it can you describe it whoa he's gone look how hard he's laughing oh this is going to help your IBM s I was right dude ital bowel memory loss vitamin B depletion long-term depletion causes brain and nerve damage wow he's [ __ ] up [ __ ] [ __ ] it dude W it can be both illegal and dangerous using nitrous can have serious health consequences including seizures permanent nerve damage seizure per nerve damage and even death seizure salad we did that one before how was it exact one Julia seizure all right back so what did it do for you it just stop repeating bus you're still going no just is it over stupid yeah it's over I don't want you to have a hlin oh my God so what happened the H you just start going Jam's done him youve done him it just start like what did it do like try to explain what it did uh it just makes everything warbly and then it just like I don't know you just started laughing are you back a hundo back a hundo all right good to have you back [ __ ] hat so you feel Dumber or what no I feel fine you don't feel like do like 30 whip it going to do another one box it's like in a seve or This is highly illegal I think not illegal at all you can buy any head shop I think it's illegal Whip It wave was days that's true that's going to [ __ ] someone up oh my God they call them wamps look at that that's I know okay for years nide
has been used for quick highs also known as Laughing Gas whippets or wamps among students tane the and abuse of the inhalent is growing oh [ __ ] they're hot right now surpris how legal is it we'll be all right he bought we'll be all right BL it out I'm not doing that hold on to it though you can at least hold on to it I make me hold it and then you're going to call me gay and I'm going to do it you are gay you got I'm not going to do it you know the pattern I'm Stand My Ground on this no you got to try you can't be that guy at least what about like a halfy can I do a halfy you got to do the whole thing it's not that big it's not that big a deal it's not that big a deal it says I want was have a seizure on the [ __ ] suck if we lost Norman because of this say the word major enabler of whip it uses accessibility the minimum age requirement to purchase a whipped cream charger is either 18 or 21 dependent on the state in New Orleans in New Orleans whippets are widely available in areas where students frequent friend growing up what do I do I just inhale you're fine hold on I'll do it with you got you got to do the whole thing it says long-term use can lead to vitamin B12 deficiency which also leads to neuropathies longterm use numbness trouble walking irritability fatigue yeah but that's like if you're doing it every day this is bad you'll be you'll be totally fine but your dad's a rabbi he doesn't want to see you doing this [ __ ] it's very cold hold on the hands this guy was in Hebrew school are you doing it I guess wait hold on I'll come with you I don't think it's legal it's totally legal Jamie is it legal a lot of air you got it I'm not a lawyer I not spy balloon advice maybe we just like shouldn't put a video on them while they're doing it I'm not so he can deny deny deny deny just breathing in a helium make a theater March 24th New York City [Laughter] Norman how is it Norman isn't it good is it good it's just blurry and and scary scary this is bad is it bad bad I went to a dark place you guys are afraid of the gravity bomb you're doing [ __ ] wh I'm not doing [ __ ] either don't do it crazy they suck yeah let's do Coke next time yeah that's way better next time we
got it here I would do it I would not do it I don't do that stuff anyway my uncle was surrounded by [ __ ] Charlie and Har crazy what was his did you ever talk to him about his transition period from coming back what he transitioned he he had a tough time yeah that must have been hard he came back yeah I was just joking it's funny to talk about a serious subject while AR's doing I think we had enough enough he's I'm not doing you gave me this I'm not do I can't remember yesterday so would would you didn't like it like wh it I just got real blurry and uh my brain went away for like two seconds interesting not a fan no I didn't laugh oh man you didn't get enough in you got brain damag bro I was doing with s s breathe a little bit in and he's like it's not working my voice is exactly the same you helium good comedy club hey he's going to tie it up for later there you go put that your good luck untying that you ever untie a balloon it's almost impossible you got to do it halfway the old balloon knot whoever came up with balloon knot was nailed na you tried to show me your butt this morning dude I did try to show you my butt I opened I knocked on his door he was [ __ ] ass a that old Jewish dick was out there that thing [ __ ] ni big old big dick that thing looked like my boner that thing that was hurtful he's got big balls too yeah he's got giant saggy dick and nuts they sag so and then he was like wait wait I want to show you he trying to show me hisle [ __ ] he didn't wait at all a big old don't you have like a disastrous [ __ ] it's the worst one you like East Palestine [ __ ] the worst one to look at it judge will get in there'll get in there je let check it out let me change some laws Red Band made a video of it back in the day yeah your I remember that video I saw that video it looked like like a [ __ ] that's what it looks like simps mou moved it oh my God looks like a cheeseburger is that what it always looks like sometimes I had HS that the best was early Legion of skanks in the
back door of theek and they were like Lou like my asshole's terrible and then like after they like oh let's look at Louis's [ __ ] and like what's are why you been quiet I'm like cuz mine will be the worst one yeah so just let you guys get out of the way yeah oh did you show it yeah they were disgusted we had we had to look at each other's [ __ ] no push backs was the rule early early hemorrhoid yeah it's a hemorrhoid why why can't you push back get out of there you're forward observers you're like my uncle you know what weird when the [ __ ] Winks when squeez when you Flex it it Winks I think we're all doing it right now I'm doing it I think every one of us is doing pretty fun Philadelphia Eagles hey so what did your what did your uncle do to like what was it like when he came back I think he came back and he had a very stressful job what did he do [ __ ] it I'll it's pretty once I tell you what he did it's specific he was like [ __ ] four scump dude he was in Three Mile Island he was at the World Trade Center he was in Vietnam [ __ ] what he was everywhere oh he he's an incredible story but connect connect the dots shrim I think I was reading an article about it cuz he's pretty popular and he was uh he was describing how his job was very stressful cuz he worked in like Wall Street and he thought he was like blaming all his stress on Wall Street and then it was like clearly it was you got hit with a [ __ ] RPG and almost died yikes and you mowed people down in Vietnam and then he went back to Vietnam and saw it and was like oh this is all all of my problems right he went back he went back wow what he went to exactly where he was no way imagine getting out and going back what a nightmare I think he said he was he felt bad cuz he got wounded pretty severely like his calf got blown off he's missing a nipple he's he got drilled he's Miss Pat he got he's Miss Pat Uh but he was like I was too Reckless and now I'm not with my men and he he he held that against himself was he a drug addict and what not I don't know about drugs I know alcol for sure was too Reckless he was like I was too Reckless I [ __ ] that up now I'm not with my men so he was like holding that against himself and then he saw what happened
and where he was he was like oh of course I got wounded I was they were coming at me people shooting at me yeah they knew I was the guy calling in the air strs blew his calf off yeah his legs he's literally missing his [ __ ] calf nipples off yeah calf and half Jesus Christ he can't help himself cway a pun machine cway house Super Bowl calf time C time show we saw it yeah we were there on shrooms Rihanna ironically the name of the guy who shot him Rihanna I KN you'd like it I like it I KN you'd like it I can do I can do a little bit of you take it on yeah I can try go nuts apparently Vietnam is like one of the most amazing places to visit I loved it yeah yeah where there where'd you go I went to Stant Saigon hoim men hoim men that's what they call it and then I went to the South to like some Tiny Town get away from like Backpackers always getting sick of everybody you get sick of all the [ __ ] tourist whites yeah District district one of hoim Min is like it's like tji Friday it's whatever yeah they have the the war remnants Museum it's the Vietnam War Memorial Museum and they have a GI outside he was like it's all propaganda in there whoa because it just talks about the Senators who later came out and said said like oh yeah I killed like 50 innocent people once bucket I yeah what was that there was one Senator that he was they were you know they were applauding him as a war hero and then finally he just like said I have to come clean yeah I got some [ __ ] I don't remember that he's like I raped a bunch of people killed a bunch of innocent people we just went down and mow out and he was like running on the fact that he's a hero and he's like boy yeah when Jamie comes back we'll uh figure out who that that Ken Burns that Ken Burns Vietnam though is [ __ ] wild I tried to watch it the first time I've watched like it was it is dense yeah then once you get into it it's like God damn was it 12 hours something [ __ ] great for flights yeah and the pandemic yeah the bom sandwich there is amazing fresh bread they got that from the French what's it called Bon Me Bon me yeah you say Mark Norman's infecting yeah I can do it he spreading his spores ony yeah yeah all you to do me you got to go
is gay yeah that's it dude [ __ ] bro yeah what the [ __ ] I would never do that [ __ ] [ __ ] bro no yeah it's pretty good thank you it's funny no yeah no want to do whip it no no than you J thank you Jamie Jamie uh can you look up whoever that Senator was that uh told the story about how uh they were trying to make him out to be a hero in Vietnam and he was like I can't do this and he he told his uh his actual true story what happened over there yeah what about the cators with the Gate Tap under the stall oh that that was a thing that they were doing in like yeah restrooms of like airports and [ __ ] right yeah yes [ __ ] how do they even work that out how do you risk that what a Hail Mary it's a Hail Mary well but if you don't know the code that I think that's part of the fun I don't know who be I think these guys are on drugs too imagine having just I don't care who's on the other end of the stall but you got to try it a nice mouth just be like I like your shoes let's go but you have anonymity yeah it's pretty good 's words differ from history John blumthal from walking de for Senator served oh no this is the guy that didn't actually served in Vietnam he lied about this is different 7s I think or 80s this was this was a guy who they were he was running as a a war hero and then he won as a war hero and then yeah he got in yeah he was ran for I think what I remember from thisor he was a longtime Senator what is that Jay Len oh John Cary holy [ __ ] I don't think that's it it was a guy he said he's part of the the not the king some well-known thing he was like that was that was my guys we [ __ ] did horrible horrible things War Bob Cary Pop Quiz who's the only President not to serve in the military Trump and the Vietnamese government is Accused Senator Bob KY no it was somebody who came out on his own oh all right whatever we probably shouldn't mention not to serve G out no that's Lincoln wasn't in there arm me was he there's a bunch of those guys that w h George Washington Adams no he was definitely in Washington kid it wasn't a country biggest General Adams but yeah the gay code is nice cuz uh you don't have to like hang out yeah just like ca what a weird pickup move that's genius the gays are they don't loln and
his troops served for 30 days did not see any action in the war that counts of War Trump went to a military school all right all right Trump went to a military he went to a military academy it's a weekend party there I bet they party handsome guy bring up Trump in his [ __ ] uniform he cleaned up you're going to laugh you're go God damn not bad whoa I don't know about that not bad for a billionaire that's pretty handsome he's got have you seen billionaires I think elon's better looking look a trump dog dude pretty good back stab you with a sword dude even knew back then put him in that yellow uniform is that a band you forget how old he is until you see like I showered with Donald Trump at military school weird a weird story he's got little hands and a little penis I heard he's back D you guys know I went to West Point that's right dumb I looked in those uniforms oh pull that up I want to see that chin going over the car I got him at home do you me dude at ease or like add attention my [ __ ] fat head like yeah it's so bad dude your mom lik it my my family was like you're a hero yeah but then they saw me in the uniform and everyone was still kind of like Jesus he look of course my mom was like you look so handsome yeah you look sharp what did they think when you got into comedy oh yeah uh I think they were happy I was doing anything same yeah they were like nice and then right before things started going well they were like all right what are you going to actually do same here exact same thing little even when it's going well yeah now it's funny I like to tell my dad cuz usually anytime I would go to a show he'd be like how much are they paying you like i' be like I'm driving to Cleveland no you can't be like how much are they paying you I'd be like $200 he's like what the [ __ ] are you doing now I like to be like Phil guess how much money they P yeah you call Phil yeah yeah yeah I go don't make me buy your house right [Laughter] now but they were [ __ ] but could you imagine your kid want to be a comic my mom told me you she was like what are you trying to do I'm trying to become a paid record at The Comedy Store she goes how much do you make for that
I'm like it's $15 a spot she was like or you can't live on that I know that here I am 50 doing whipits shut up idiot yeah BR a with if your kid was gonna do that if your kid was going to go into comedy like what are the odds of success so it's crazy talking about of it he wants to be a lawyer you're like yeah study hard you can go to law school you can actually be a lawyer it's there's you can make it there also if you're a bad lawyer it's not nearly as embarrassing as if you're a bad you tell and my yeah my yeah my parents saw me do standup in Harrisburg they came to a show where they were like one of 12 people in the audience no and I my closing joke was like would you rather get shot in the head or 69 with your dad no way it kills that joke kills I everybody wants to say you would never suck your dad's dick but that gun comes out you and your dad get awfully friendly you got to bring that b me and my dad are big we would do it standing I'd flip his old ass up his new bces would be kicking in the air my dad was in the front row like godamn it Jesus Christ far away from West Point yeah West Point was like 3 years before that if your parents are like [ __ ] sober normal people and then you enter into that world and you're talking that kind of [ __ ] on stage well my dad's not a sober no yeah that's not the issue goes to the [ __ ] Elks every you know he's oh the Elks are fun but but he's a normal person that's crazy it's crazy talking about sucking your dad's dick on a [ __ ] stage in front of regular people they brought their friends they brought another couple oh my god when I said that joke I vividly remember my mom just goes oh no oh a oh my God it's hilarious I wouldn't let him come see me would let too much I told him never to come again and then my dad called like two days later and was like Hey and I was like if this is about comedy I'm I can't can't do it and he was like all right I'm just saying everybody else is talking about stories you're up there talking about doing gay stuff your dad's giving you advice gave
me comedy advice oh my God has he seen you recently no you got to send them some stuff how how recent two years ago oh that's not good enough I know I'm going to have come no no you show them what the [ __ ] is up come to a theater yeah come to a theater pops you should kill the whole time then close with that 69 bit again I will do that hey here we go I told you work I told you my son is he's doing pretty well God damn it he said talking about blow I thought you were done with that [ __ ] joke bring it back brought it back for you Dad they don't get it too you're like I got in the seller they're like who seller what no that was the thing the only one they understood was SNL of course and I got it and I got to call them and be like hey I got SNL and they're like we're so proud yeah we're going to be so happy for you for two days later two days later and then my you know my mom and dad are going around my mom especially is like my son's on S cuz my I was a loser forever oh man and then now she gets to go tell all her friends whose kids are [ __ ] orthodontists and then they call back like so your son's not better than the well we're so sorry for you they can brag and send Christmas cards that is made news week hell yeah my whole town was pretty proud all right for real I thought people would be upset my dad was like hell yeah is there a celebrity from mechanics yeah Mike uh [ __ ] poison oh really yeah Brett Michaels sh let's go is M Brett Michaels mechanic what you're like a new englande right you say Marland miking the mechanics what's that in The Living Years what in The Living Years in The Living Years think that whip it [ __ ] you up I got see if they're real whatever you don't play that terrible song it was a top hit song oh right now they're like we're on the a [ __ ] I listen to arst podcast for music that I don't want to listen to what kind of recommendations sure we were in the car on the way over I was I had the ox I was playing [ __ ] Bone Thugs and Migos and I was considering asking Ari that'll do it good Lord what music do you like no it's going to be some dumb madeup [ __ ] those Greatest Hits like made up [ __ ]
blue wolf and the dancing pansies like shut up this is a cool Indie band from Guatemala I got really into them during the pandemic I remember being 20 with your backpack on just want to see the world I have Wonder doing whipits with backpack in Vietnam Parks watching a drum circle having a seizure in the jungle don't do another one man I'm worried about you do another one jle keep going is this that song seizure in the jungle is a great B this came up has 27,000 views what is it song for a wild yeah put your headphones on so you can hear it I want to hear this what the [ __ ] I don't know this is what it sounds like when you walk into an Indian restaurant that's a song specifically designed to do whipits too maybe does it feel good yeah you like it yeah not bad yeah a freaky music this music is not going can't talk dude relax having aoke 71 yeah don't do this stroke out on the podcast does not go with this I'm not getting big enough balloons out of this I think you're good I think you're good dude I mean I think high school kids champ this [ __ ] pretty easy they rule yeah you've done three now it's not a long-term thing I've seen Bros champ boxes easy yeah really yeah oh where I was in last time I was in like last year I was in Philly me and my friends who do comedy would play poker together yeah all a sudden they just were like middle of we're playing poker they just all broke out whipits wow the rest of it we played for 3 hours they were doing just is that steo oh no get breath it was wild to see this I I don't know the exact part where he's doing it filled with them it's bad when Knoxville is like you got to relax yeah that doesn't seem that's him the factory none of that seems wise he's got a [ __ ] together he's got a good podcast now he's kicking ass sober doing comedy Ste R jackass jackass rules jackass when I was in Spain jackass made me so proud every like I saw people wearing jackass t-shirts and I was like damn it's it's I've almost grown up by laughing so hard it was great the theater it was Mayhem every other comedy you're like oh you guys are just like
trying to get to a percentage of Jackass oh no it's like adult cartoons people falling getting hit D oh my God [ __ ] their bodies up too dick his dick pretty good yeah yeah yeah Knoxville his dick is [ __ ] I tried couldn't get it going yeah I mean the just the the [ __ ] sheer punishment those guys take just Bulls Bulls like what are you doing like the whole job was I'm going to get a donkey to kick at me and he just get right up to him kick that one's great when he's [ __ ] shaking when he's walking won't go any other way didn't they stand blindfolded in front of bulls yeah Knoxville did Knoxville has been that Ino pun nuts poor danger Aon danger Aaron stole the last movie you know how crazy that is that's franu punch you in the nuts look at him focusing nanu I mean how do you stand that I I Flinch on a on a gat this is crazy that's so bad is it you going to show me oh yeah that was wonderful oh that's fun I love when they [ __ ] like I'm not doing the sketch stea was going to do it but he understands that MMA guys punch really hard and they tricked this guy I don't think they knew they didn't tell him inana was going to come around the my God oh my God his face immediately goes Agony they're talking about it too so unnecessary I'm sure there's women who like that they're like this is hot these guys watching guys jack guys got [ __ ] oh yeah yeah I know they're rist takers they're rist takers women like guys who like do flips and they they drunk yeah they're millionaires do whippets on Pods at 74 yeah you might get some [ __ ] for this yeah bro what was Vietnam like what I remember is it was just every day was a war oh a war what about the foe over there pretty good foe foe's not bad I was really into the Bon mes all right you just get them to go they're so good so fresh it's a fresh bread they they love it French bread yeah so we eat po boy on the French is without the bread it's not a poor boy yeah that's why I loved one of those things of like somebody at some college campus was like bitching at their student uh Union for doing the um doing the Bon me sandwich not the authentic way like some sort of Tasco on it or something instead of like Sriracha yeah
he's like that's not authentic Vietnamese everyone's like it's french bread it's from the it's from the colonization did you guys ever do the standup bong hit you know some paper towel roll you're on the on the wall and you're both squatting and he takes a giant vaporizer hit or whatever and he blows it into your mouth while you stand up and then you fall back down immediately no you never did that no oh oh oh oh beer bong no no bed hugee hit and then as you come up and it hits you so hard shotgun as you're standing up you're standing up so the uh the oxygen goes away interesting this is pre- internet you know four guys in a house just figuring [ __ ] out figuring it out nothing to do but if I blow the smoke in your face yeah then you stand up exactly that was one of the things they did during n they do it through rifles yeah it's cool that can end well yeah now they got yeah yikes shot imagine being high as [ __ ] and also in Vietnam in the middle of the war going what the [ __ ] man yeah so they they did a shotgun where they literally opened up the barrel damn and then blowing the weed through I like how they're not touching it with their mouth CU they don't want to get herpes they don't want to be gay they don't be gay be sucking on that gun in front of everybody whoa got kill the day but then what if super par high as [ __ ] and you're in the jungle in Vietnam you realize you're this stupid [ __ ] war that makes no sense has zero support behind it the nature walks are good what are we doing I'm I'm shooting people with zero support behind it yeah you're out in nature he would like yeah that's what they said one of the reasons they won they took go over all the reasons of Vietnam won they were like the Americans were like I don't even want to be here well yeah no one did yeah like I I don't care about these people and the vietnames were fighting for their home what about they ever meet one of those guys who's like you know when 9/11 happened they're like I'm going over there yeah thank God for guys like that I'm like oh Patman left being a [ __ ] NFL star to go over there and he got killed by Friendly Fire friendly fire oh you hate to hear and they had to hide it they had to hide it he was a hero he
wasn't a hero obviously he was just he still a hero a bummer of a guy like a bad I think he was it was an accident I thought they were like some people said it was on purpose some people say it was on purpose he started to see like oh this is [ __ ] pointless what are we doing here even and then like oh we got to shut him up keep him a hero oh no is a theory I don't boy I hope not yeah God you hope not yeesh anyway let's talk about something funnier than Friendly Fire bat in Vietnam I know right what the nice you changed the mood of everything when you read out your uncle's text pretty sick though I mean imagine being on a plane reading that the way he described it to was amazing too your uncle's smart yeah he's fired up how about that Mahomes he's good no sorry I like you know what I like though I like I came around on Jackson Jackson Mahomes who's that the brother his brother that does Tik toks and his wife his annoying wife that screams oh yeah everyone hates on them and it actually makes me happy they're F his wife have you ever seen this I don't watch Patrick Mahomes is the best quarterback well second Jaylen was obviously MVP oh that hurts should have been I mean unforced fumble was tough Patrick Mahomes has a wife that's just wild she's up in the Box she's like films herself it's her and his brother his brother does like Tik toks and Patrick's obviously he's the man and then he's got a crazy wife and a brother up in the box like all [ __ ] and his wife's up there like you thought you were gonna beat us think again it's the best forcing everyone like bir to [ __ ] be in a [Music] video oh yeah she's a lot she's a lot whoa Jesus problem is they keep that same energy when you get divorced they come after you they come after you with that same energy these kids are going crazy who's like football fans like who gets more fired up than football fans I'd sayb proud boys well especially when the FBI people are my home wife rules ring things up right it just came out today that the FBI was involved in Black lives matter protests turning them violent come
on there's allegations let see if you can find that they doing it during Vietnam [ __ ] watch the [ __ ] BLM alarm you you still have that stupid [ __ ] watch runs like a watch it doesn't w at all watch 501 fed's deliberately targeted BL BLM protesters disrupt the movement report says they did in Vietnam in the Vietnam thing they do it with everything they do with everything let's get some guys in there vient agent provocator yeah yeah they [ __ ] 100% did it there the snitch in the silver Hearst what is that FBI paid a violent felon to infiltrate Denver's radical Justice movement wow Jaylen Herz of course crazy they always do that they don't like these [ __ ] movements and they go you know what disrupt it just let's send in some people to smash some windows sh Wall Street they'll like get in there undercover cops start fights and then the other cops going to be like hey they're fighting we got to break it up break that's what they did with the World Trade Organization went to occupy you went to occupy want to see what it was about he's trying to [ __ ] chck how old were you I was like 23 24 the bo was wild but it was something to see cuz it was kind of new all that kind of stuff now we have a protest every 10 minutes but that was fun to watch they shut that [ __ ] down yeah a lot of pepper spray yeah also interesting that they were like you guys did this we're just going to like hover around you work yeah that's true it's a totally different kind of a a movement it was like the beginning of these kind of mass movements look at us as you go into yeah we're going to park out here they weren't like disruptive grass like break anybody's car windows or anything we occupy it was right when Obama won so it was like a wacky time in New York interesting yeah CU it was 2008 financial collapse black president first black press a lot of shit's going on the economy goes into the tank after the the housing crisis oh yeah and then they're like you guys did it so it's almost like there were white blood cells surrounding an infection wow it was some blacks I mean it's not what I meant oh sorry yeah yeah and they're just like calling attention to realizing there's something wrong with this we are the 99%
but they're not even they don't even understand what that means oh boy they're not the 99% but people feel globally right globally you make $34,000 in your top 1% of the world that's how Wild World nobody wants to hear that people who are like against the 1% want to realize they're in the 1% of this country ah they're like what I'm not like yeah yeah you're super wealthy the 1% of this country is like I think it's like a half a million dollars a year wow no way it might be less it might be like what is the 1% what's the top 1% what do you have to make it's like every doctor but the 1% of the world is $34,000 really top 1% of the world is over $334,000 all right Ari you're in okay it's 820 not nationally $33,000 in 2020 so I was off by quite a b that's a lot what is it that's a lot $823,000 in 2020 wait what's the other number national average of the top 1% ear earners is 597 th000 people doing the research I think oh Economic Policy Institute was the first one this is a study by smart asset point is the second one so okay so somewhere between $600 and $800,000 R wow okay the average that's in America the average of the 1% which means you can still be in the 1% at like 400,000 or maybe like actually the top has billions in it so probably 570 so average annual wage Gap yeah so a lot of [ __ ] money yeah there you go oh wait a minute look how it say it was phrased originally annual gross income of 590,000 yeah that's what it is the average annual income of more than half a million dollars okay all right we're doing okay then well for the rest of the world we're doing [ __ ] amazing yeah I we get paid 200 grand for this podcast it's just it's not perfect halfway there it's not perfect there flaws oh yeah I remember an old video of Rogan on some like before before tough crowd it was like four people talking maybe it's Bill Maher or something I don't know there's some guy saying he wants to up the national for anyone over a million dollars 70% remember this 7% Income Tax It Go and Joe goes on air goes if you take 75 70% of my money going to kick your [ __ ] ass yeah whoa I was like you're out of your [ __ ] mind you're going to take 70% of it it's like that some places they take a lot of your money New York takes a tough big chunk
well there's a lot of people that believe that that's how to solve the the country's woes is to redistribute the wealth take the wealth away from all the wealthy people pay 80 90% in taxes give it all the money to the poor people they're just looking at it as a numbers thing they're not looking at as like why do people make money in the first place they have incentive they work hard if you don't have you're not going to have equal money if you don't have equal effort and it doesn't mean that everybody has equal opportunity because some people they can make a lot more money with a lot less effort but the people that can become like a Warren Buffett or one of those they do that because there's an incentive there's an incentive the that's the only reason why they chase that game and if you're going to put a limit on that game and you're going to say hey once you get to a certain level that game you got to give us all the money like that you've killed all it's not that's a problem it's let's get everybody else up a little bit oh yeah should be tackling there's ways to do it and that's the Bernie Sanders idea of like taxing a small amount of speculative uh Market Wagers so like when people are betting on they're going back and forth he's talking about taking a fraction of a penny from each transaction would result in trillions of dollars a year wow interesting I know a lot of people don't like that Alexandria Cortez kazio lady but like she said something at the beginning of Co she goes we got get fi back in their job she goes no we don't have to get people back in their 60 hour week jobs barely making their ends meet we have to like change the system a little bit so we live our lives right but how do you do that I don't know the way you do that is by more bureaucracy more more people that get paid to redistribute the wealth and if they get a a grip on your money and they can say Hey you know you have been too successful so we're going to take that and give it to people that aren't successful but that doesn't work but that's the thing that it all goes to always 40 hour work week you got to go to the source Antiquated you don't got to move box for 40 hours you get your [ __ ] done 25 hours enjoy your life I know but they do it with homeless too they go hey we got to give money to the
homeless you're like the guy's still addicted to fentanyl suddenly change you're not going to fix why he's mentally ill right yeah got to go to the stour that's one of the biggest things with every politician is like I don't know the answer to this bring it up it's every city in America you it can be done inour it's ever seen yeah but Port SF get the experts on it La it's crazy MH Austin's not that bad they cleaned up a lot of it man they used to have a lot of tents underneath the bridges it's all gone now except the occasional tent they eventually clean up where where did they go they bought home they bought a hotels move people pal g a shovel got to be cheap I mean real estate money is going down real quick time to invest in we you get a house there yeah who knows what the actual extent of the environmental disaster is like how long before they actually tell them the truth yikes but I remember being like thinking BP was like the end of society don't do it you sick son of we got a show tonight the eagle not the eagle find there put On's table hey do you remember when that dude uh who number six here who was it the guy from the FBI that's saying let the Eagles soar you remember that guy what was he saying let the Eagles was he the guy that was uh during the Obama Administration is that what his name Obama who was it was he during the Bush Administration John ashc John Ashcraft big ass you ever you ever see that guy sing No John Ashcraft was like the boogeyman he was like this very creepy right-wing guy look at this look him sing this yeah I remember this oh wow this is weird lessons shoot him I've never heard fun the dude from the Chael runs up and stabs him if you ever got attacked by an eagle who was John Ash again what did what was John ashcs position but I remember everybody attorney general yeah everybody was freaked out about him they were all scared of him he was like this hardore rightwing guy want to lock up all those dope smokers one of those guys oh boy he's a wild Christian guy singing Let the Eagles those guys were fun cuz they were the bad guy they had be like rap is control these are the Nerds now it's
hard to tell everybody's the nerd now now the left is the nerd those guys like wraps out of control and they're like we're going to [ __ ] invade Iraq exactly exactly rap not Iraq what does it say Patriot Games attorney general when the Patriot Act started Ah that's it there it is rap's bad we're going to [ __ ] spy on everybody we're going to invade Iraq they're going to blow up families yeah the rap thing came from uh Tipper Gore Al Gore's wife yeah yeah that's was wild it was the Democrats then Liz Cheney kept it rolling did she yeah she was into that yeah yeah they heard NWA they're like whoo yeah stuff it did come out of nowhere I remember listening to it on a [ __ ] treadmill I was like on a StairMaster in Riv Massachusetts at the gym and uh I was listening to it with a Walkman cassette walk I was like holy [ __ ] yeah these guys are pretty serious these guys are like you never heard no's never music like that before oh wow no they made business when I was young I got &m and DM that was what I got ice cube fifth grade listen to DMX album yeah that was heavy stuff Rough Riders roll I got blood on my dick cuz I [ __ ] a corpse on school bus just like I was a giant Ghetto Boys fan GH R I'd listen to Ghetto Boys when I delivered newspapers you know what's nice my uncle that uh was in Vietnam not the one I was talking about the other Uncle he he's still he was a prison Warden after Vietnam and then he like hung out with just black dudes cuz he was prison warden so everybody around him so now he talks like that he'll be like what's up holes oh that's F he loves the Ghetto Boys he'll be out in his garage like benching g ghet bo ghet boys [ __ ] I did their podcast and they were super fun super nice but they're old now so I'd make a gay joke and they're like easy man easy you murdered people what the [ __ ] all right all do a b uh oh I mean he's done whippets weed booze I'm not doing a whip it cuz you're gay I'm not a [ __ ] eighth grader bro yeah it doesn't seem like valuable it was bad news it lasted a short amount of time and it's 30 seconds in and out [ __ ] up for a long time to ruin my week what is salvia wasn't that a quick high was a quick one no what am I thinking was 10 minutes where you you trip for like five
minutes Salvia was pretty good that way oh baby JoJo rabbit's dipping into the bag don't give me that little sorry oh yeah the bag of candy that perfectly legal bag of regular stuff yeah I'm reaching for the one that calls me some spice maybe what was that where it like [ __ ] you up tripped was it Sal we talked about that the other day on the podcast you were gone for like three months living another life gone but like 10 minutes tops and then back gone he was gone for 10 minutes but during that 10 minutes he had three months of another life he lived another life he had relationships and friendships it was wild that sounds awesome yeah way different than whippits whippits is that was legal everywhere they missed that one they missed Salvia yeah and you go 40 20 times 40 times or 60 times like used get the most potent version of DMT on the internet used to be able to get five methoxy DMT on the internet used to be able to buy it it was not for human consumption you would buy it was pure from a chemical company and they would ship it to your house enough to get the whole city high as [ __ ] wow what is DMT what happens well it's it's a psychedelic it's a psychedelic compound I can talk about it's a dimethyl tryptamine it's actually produced by your brain and it's a psychedelic chemical that they think has something to do with near-death experiences it has something to do with dreams but it's an endogenous chemical so it's real quick your your body brings you back to Baseline like do that next time yeah yeah what the hell it's crazy because your brain makes it but it's super illegal like Terence M had a great quote you said everybody's holding whoa holding back it's a no they're holding holding was like how these talk about drug are you holding like what do you got you holding holding coffee everyone's holding DMT it's so weird hippies I come in contact with cuz some of them like I got mushrooms I grown it's like okay and they're like I it just seems like bathtub [ __ ] it's like I make my own DMT it's like I trust that way less than Boomers totally yeah I don't know how you're making it who it once and it was it just made everything look like video games oh you didn't do it right I didn't do it hard enough I didn't do it hard enough time I was
trying I was trying I kept trying I did it once and I was like close let the I saw I saw a giant caterpillar come down this tree and look at me for like two minutes and then just goes and then head back up the tree and I was like what the [ __ ] looked over at this girl that I was doing it with she goes I died and came back I'm like damn it I you get [ __ ] bug told me she lighter yeah maybe she's lighter mushrooms got me there to dead and come back wow I ate a bunch I was high on Molly and I ate a bunch of them W Molly and mushrooms together it's not smart I didn't yeah it was all I Wasing the best Cho you talking about that is the purest combination we should do Mol and then a little mushrooms would be pretty great I was taking I was like isn't this funny taking [ __ ] handfuls the only problem with mushrooms you get a bad trip and Molly's like that won't happen today those mushrooms outweigh those mus or the mushrooms destroy the Molly so quick what about I I was everything was good and then all a su great we Liv like IA are we going to freeze what's that we going to go out there and freeze remember we wanted to refresh I think that was more of a last night thing that was drunk drunk talk I woke up today like I think that's going to hurt and I don't want to do it fun will you just open up your throat oh yeah I want to do [ __ ] yeah [ __ ] look at that we're back dude America's back I'm worried about you this is a lot of drugs he's fine all right he just knows how you one we're doing he for some reason can do this yeah it's true he can got that reading oh cuz I'm I'm not 12 doesn't even look that old well wait till the hat and the glasses go off oh there we go justd everyone knows which te the special dud as it Ren's wedding and and you see the people coming in but I'm on the last table and he goes and this was 15 years ago giant shiny this giant shiny sorry [ __ ] box of my head ruining every photograph sorry what did you say did he actually get married yeah it's pretty funny I heard he got married but I don't know if it's true W I like Steve yeah Steve is the best now I the best my friend goes like twice
a year he said like cleans you out just set you back we could all Baseline I know a great place the middle of the Jungle can we do it here you always to go Tock jungle everybody wants to go some the living yeah subses want to live in a nice place that's quiet you don't like suburbs [ __ ] that no not to do [ __ ] hard drugs I love to live New York I love to see people I love all the excitement [ __ ] I live in New York and I hate it I have to bro it's hard it's hard living in New York it's expensive sucks boys it does suck come dirty Texas it's dirty it's very dirty come to Texas I was never going to come to Texas and then I got those taxes and I was like godamn I might [ __ ] Texas came here for 6 months in one day [ __ ] yeah now we're going Jamie next again you know you're next yes come on Mark suck you put one in there too that was just one Mark's just being [ __ ] s it hurts it hurts the throw hurts Mark you got to [ __ ] do it we got a we got a couple hours ahead of yeah we're fine we've got plenty of time boys let drink the club tonight that is going to be [ __ ] great we go do V and then we we bring we leave immediately after drink and talk there we have all of our inspections pass and we have furniture let's go there we're days away yeah we're going to go after the show yeah yeah all right yeah we're going to go to the V show and then we'll go get [ __ ] up in that bar I can't wait to show you guys what it looks like now it's incredible hell yeah it seems fake do you think there's booze there is there a bar ready we'll get bar we'll get booze if we don't have booze there we'll get booze don't worry we'll goica America [ __ ] yeah we're we policing again yeah we're back at it all you think you're going to stay in New York no matter what that's your no I'll stay for two more years and I'll leave where you going to go probably like you come to Austin Poli I think London London London not brown enough why are you going to [ __ ] other New York that's what I did before I light in New York funny voice New York you got to be like a you know might as well move to Boston
Dublin would be sick Dublin would be sick Dublin's small be you want to live in London yeah do spots like doing spots they got good shows in London good shows a lot of good shows I'm going to Australia after you be great Sydney would be a cool place to live to doing the Sydney Opera House come to it yeah he's doing Sydney Opera house I saw Shane at Town Hall was [ __ ] great so cool all those people you watch Comedy all those people well I was there no yeah I just came back from some from like Mexico you got to see me yeah it was right when you got back you got to see me surrounded by all it so funny to see the Jews just [ __ ] GL Bing on to him the industry they talk differently like Shan excited to be working with you just I'm just talking to that guy he was like yeah I'm the head of Netflix I was like oh [ __ ] I should have been more respectful I got to get to your special Network people were hovering it's cuz the New York Comedy Festival is all there they're just hovering hovering that's exactly right they're trying to figure out way to get a piece that chain pie suck Little Slice me little s just cut me a slice help life well they're so mean to us at the beginning when they hover you're like yeah and M Casher at Montreal saw just new faces and like two old people were on both sides of them talking to them it just looked like they were sucking the youth right at of that's what they do give it a second [ __ ] yeah it's cold give a second that's a cold punch that's a cold punch iron throat that's a punch hell yeah that's a cold snack uberman that's a punch all right goggin a wow good looking e [ __ ] [ __ ] we got to name this little guy yeah what's his name [ __ ] that's Freedom that's Freedom our pet eagle there you go you like free dude is South Park the best South amazing because they're best get away with so much I couldn't place them who was it it was uh Stone yeah and we I was like who is that guy don't from basketball who is that guy and you were like you just give me this like oh that's the one guy ever who is it though we were at Louis show at the Garden he was there yeah it was uh and and I was sitting there I was like dude that's him and when you told me I was like oh yes Shane will go up and say hi I can't do
it I'll go up and say but I'm pretty good at it I good at it y I'm a big fan and then I walk away that's the key I get too nervous around those people but I'm like I'm like you should say hi yeah I was like I'm going to go do it I just walked up to him I said big fan that's it like okay and then walked away then I stared at him from 8 ft away hours I was going I love you so much dude you meant the whole world to me but they have a freedom that no one else has on nobody got it no one has that freedom on Comedy Central not even close when we used to fight for people like words on is that happening we like they're allow like you got to show precedent like Cartman did it like doesn't count everything else would count except not South Park isn't that wild yeah [ __ ] on the air they're just grandfathered in not just grandfathered in they're just the best Above the Law family says some crazy [ __ ] too Family Guy does Family Guy definitely does South Park South Park's like if you even come at them they'll [ __ ] eviscerate you another the guy who put them on the map they eviscerated too they took George Clooney who sent put them over and we're like we're sorry dude we got to come after you the smug you're being you're being a douche we got to come after you thank you for giving us everything we have but we have to come after you Kanye Carlos Mania episode he's like I'm not funny man I got no dick I got no dick man oh my God yeah he's like you don't get it he's like for real you don't get it please get it please get it please what do you mean you don't get it man it's crazy they're on cable too this isn't like an internet show they're on TV but they were on cable and cable was the internet like oh it's wild there it's wild there it's 25 years grandfather didn't like a Tarantino movie was it HBO at first it was a Christmas card at first it was a video I got video cassette was a Christmas in there's a girl that I was I was dating a girl who was a agent at William Morris and they were passing around the office and everybody got copies of it and I was like this is insane it was so fun it was what would Brian boyano Doan do he were here right now Heely kick an ass or to that's what Brian boy
is even more primitive like if you watch the animation back then it was even more you know how much I loved South Park when we were playing when we were playing basketball when we were playing basketball as kids you know how you write stuff in marker on your shoes in basketball I wrote Brian boyano Alan I sharpy thank God for them I know on the trans stuff they're the front line they're the tip of the spear what's going on here give me some volume Christmas is for celebrating my birth Christmas is for giving I'm here to put an end to your blasphemy this time we finish it there can be only one W Wendy Yeah Wendy Tess St right here they're just cutting out pieces of paper go Jesus vers he's a Street Fighter character all of a sudden [Music] oh my God fart noise it killed Kenny that's the first one the first oh really yeah the first they killed Kenny wow it's also great that people like it like this would suck if people were like we hate that show it's shitty but people love it they can't say that it it entertains so many people they just can't say it so it's like they keep coming after them it's like they stopped because no one bowed down they just stopped and went away do you remember when they drew mam a episode this week no I mean the anger at them stop you like this remember they drew Muhammad but they drew Muhammad in a bear suit inside of a van oh yeah they're the NWA of Comedy they go hard they go pretty [ __ ] hard they also every time I watch the episode I go [ __ ] I was wrong I'm gay they're right yeah if I ever opinion they they hit both sides so if like you're like yeah you're attacking that other side and they turn it like to your side you're like ah damn it I'm lame then you see you you saw the documentary yeah you know and they're just sitting in a room like H the clock's ticking we got to figure out an angle here it was the [ __ ] uh it was the uh Human Centipede one he was like Kye yeah a cuddlefish exactly and then you're like maybe I should pull back on
my comedy I go too dark and then you see that you're like no [ __ ] it it's fun yeah yeah the the thing about it is that it's cartoons and they're not even remotely realistic cartoons so you can get away with so much and they never age no one gets too old no they aged one year once it they fourth grade Miss chokes on dick it's like it's like we can get a whole new set of teachers Now by aging one year wow they're they're also right that's the hard part yeah remember when the teacher had a horor off with with uh sh her up his ass he was just MH no that's hor that's for surey okay let me show you now I learned about rim job from South Park yeah what a show the the PC principal all of it they've been on for what now 25 years 26 years scho 1997 I thinkes freshman year college from I was thinking about it I was thinking about it last uh this week when I was watching the new episode I was like when this ends I'm going to be [ __ ] sad this has been my whole life I wonder if they're ever going to end they will eventually seems like they enjoy it I mean there's doing it's so funny they have to be having a time they two where they could be like we're taking three years off and anybody like whatever you got to do Cur like whenever you want to come back you're welcome to mhm it's funny because like if you give people the freedom to do whatever the [ __ ] you want you get a South Park but they're never going to do that again it was Colin Quinn's at keynote address at Montreal he was like industry if you got it right half the time I could understand you talking but you're right never don't you just want to shut up and let us fail on our terms that's why the internet's great yeah we can just go to that well they never when you guys think's going to swing back well the pendulum is good for us though the pendulum not swinging back is good for the internet like you could imagine if this show was on Comedy Central imagine the notes we would get but this yeah's doing whipits we're doing bong hits we might may may not have done mushrooms Ian nobody did mushrooms nobody did mushrooms though that's the thing mushrooms are bad com Central was right in this case because we did not do musroom we definitely did not CU those are not legal they have a lot of notes
though we need more gays than just Jamie it was so weird fighting with Jamie oh this one's yours Jamie that this big dog come on yeah he's playing it for himself hitting the music for himself jro get fired up come on J J look how fast he sucks man he's got a big that's Columbus Ohio in the [ __ ] house [ __ ] up hell yeah underrated as a bro Theo I see Jamie walk in the room I go yeah Jamie quiet he's jacked and he's quiet he's the [ __ ] Michael Jordan of podcast producers even close he's the goat [ __ ] great he moved away huge dick last night last night we were trying I was trying to talk him into going to a strip club he was like got to work yeah he wouldn't do it he wanted to go I could tell he wanted to hang out with me and drink he can't go down that road he didn't want to do it you hired the right guy you got a good guy met at a comedy club I was trying all my tactics America Shane has good tactics I'm pretty good at peer pressuring the main word is just you won't got to do that for an hour and then eventually be like like I got to get out of here last night before this goes south it went I have my commitment my one hour in front of the computer commitment I've tried that with girls go south go south actually that was the first time that was actually it went North it went North it was pretty it went Northwest Nick the [ __ ] Nick's a good dude oh Nick's a good egg Nick is he looks like if Bard Simpson grew up he's a good dude he's a solid dude like uh when the club opens up I'm 100% committed to still doing Vulcan really yeah I want to do that too that's competition n not really there's no competition I more sets and less I don't believe it I believe it that's like competition like doing someone else's podcast is like competition I don't believe it no okay be here we we flipped the script the internet flipped the script did you do one yet yeah yeah you're 100% bro he's he's already five years in yeah okay I was waiting for it to cool off I
know are are you three beers in here cool off a little no four plus this one Jesus CH I want six come on Whiskey where's this Bodega cat got wait till it kicks h you got to wait for the right time [ __ ] yeah still holds up get a baby look at that neck [ __ ] yeah all right I'm get a new song Freedom is the way no don't get a new song no no that's our song man hey can can you prepare me a nice cold okay you want freedom bir an nice a nice cold bomb I'm going to piss try not to say anything to hey Marky yeah you've lost it old man [ __ ] yeah yes was right about him dude how how much is man rule dude oh man he's a funny guy I actually opened for him once he was very nice come on I swear to God really the Harrisburg Second Street comedy club in Harrisburg woo they have two clubs there they did it failed pretty quick yeah yeah and I was the only host I did the sound I did the lights and the hosting you did the turn your cell phones no there there was no announcements I was doing the I was drunk doing the hosting I was doing the announcements from uh the piano the piano player wasn't there at the com store I was like guys turn your phones off um make sure to be there uh be quiet um hey we had an earthquake last week aren't earthquakes weird was like no no I had to open for a comic I don't want to name him but he he played uh he was like I want my intro song to be Sex on Fire by Kings on like that song of course God you're a [ __ ] loser country it is actually a great song but that's gay to say you like it that's why you got to take it to your grave and that can't be your bring up music yeah as an intro song in comedy I've been doing I've been doing a black skin head intro songs uh see that's corner you can't pick a too cool of a song it's so cool it's just the beat up front yeah I don't want to [ __ ] that I come out to Tops Drop by Fat Pat there you go you know who else comes out to that who uh what's who's uh black dude heavyweight my balls is hot level Crawford no no the H it's a Houston yeah it's a Houston classic derk's the man that's he comes out to the best the best come out music
was Homer Simpson why can't Why Can't We Be Friends listen how good this is as an intro song wait till it kicks in you should you should do that bong when it hits in that is catchy that's fun right not too serious fat P oh [ __ ] this is Mr Pat That's a classic That's a classic that's a great one you know my favorite my favorite was I didn't know the UFC that well but when Wonder Boy fought Tyron Woodley and he I like I rarely watched UFC yeah and then Wonderboy came out to [ __ ] Tenacious D Wonderboy and he was fighting Woodley who at the time was just a yoked [ __ ] black dude and then you see this like karate guy coming out to Tenacious D and I was like come on brother please give us one he's a good fighter though who Wonderboy oh Wonderboy the man [ __ ] unreal Wonderboy is the man but I think he did lose that one uh I think it was a draw oh I think it was a draw all right but there was one point there was one point where Woodley one draw one decision deepest Guillotine you've ever seen then he popped his head out and it was like it was a great fight there was two great fights that was uh McGregor vers Alvarez was it I think it was that night I think the best fight is gayi vers Michael Johnson it's a [ __ ] blood a great fight that's a great fight that was gai's first fight in the UFC what no way yeah it was yeah gatei had come over from the pfl he was the pfl champion and he came over to uh the the UFC and it was like one of the most exciting prospects I remember thinking like this guy's why he he goes down like twice but com he's the most violent guy in the most violent sport he's my favorite fighter to watch G Diaz dude well Diaz is fun personality fun loving guy he also he's a character he also the last several fights he's been in I was at his fight I was fight with fing like sitting there what Jiu-Jitsu guy Jesus Christ Epstein Epstein oh yeah the Jitsu guy Epstein oh oh yeah I thought you say and he get and he was like what we're just you were with the fingers and like what part of it him versus uh Rocky who's uh Marciano no Leon Edwards him versus Leon Edwards yeah so he catches
dude in a triangle he know [ __ ] yeah that's he's got two minutes left there's zero chance it's not fullon lock he does have to grab his head it's over that was my favorite Joe that was like my favorite call you did was him walking you like he's walking towards him like a [ __ ] horror movie he knows his lock banged up just like still walking oh that was 08 yeah holy moly he was the younger brother then yeah he wasn't his own man that's good point yeah you're right but still Wicked Jiu-Jitsu jiujitsu Purple belt yeah does he still say that what it was he saying he was a purple belt for a long time was he be like shut up dude just a purple belt that's fine he landed on Leon the slap and oh my God when he hit him with that straight left hand like got you [ __ ] see that's why it's the funnest sport cuz they have personalities like the the Dolphins are just the Dolphins n You' be suris you'd be surprised well you showed me some Jayla they didn't let him [ __ ] go nuts on air anymore yeah they contain those guys they try to sponsor they've contained him for a while but now there's Twitter true so like you know he's a flat earther now after that game yeah that helps well eventually they all become flattered they get dinged in the head not real what does come out to what does Nate D come out California Love and then switch to something California Love Too Short 99 [ __ ] 9,9 [ __ ] 99 Red Balloons West Coast 00 L 12 yeah um yeah Waka music's important I love when a Brazilian comes out just like whistles and drums and [ __ ] I was in Brazil with Rogan our first Brazil fight and uh they all CH walked up to a mash up of four songs W WX Wayne Drake wow he had four songs and Tupac interesting wow Tupac interesting J so he just [ __ ] mixed it all up the way am was at the Garden I was was at that one who which that was pretty sick that was the [ __ ] bad [ __ ] belt which I wish they hadn't done fight that was a lame the bad [ __ ] belt sucked sucked it like they were too aware of it it's kind of fun though that's his matchup M comes out there's not there's not much like a
world championship walk out at the UFC sometimes I take my headset off like when I'm sitting there doing commentary when someone's walking out I'll just take my headset off just to take like fany just to take it yeah I'm a fan man I'm a professional fan he comes out to Scarface which is [ __ ] sick one of the cool things about being a UFC commentator is I'm I'm I'm just like really professional uh he came out to DMX right didn't Anderson come out to DMX I like the ghee because they look like nerds and then they kick ass old days fight good one what's this Anderson's walking up Ain't No Sunshine Bill Withers yeah Bill Withers was the [ __ ] man died and everyone was like he made me so sad I love that guy's music he's great that song Use Me yes oh my God that's such a good song they put that was in uh you know what was nice that I'm [ __ ] up what what they put it in uh Any Given Sunday there you ever see that movie yeah awesome Pino uh what's his name how Pino the old quarterback caperon he's like the veteran Allstar he was hurt then he comes back in in the playoffs and they play use me it's such a perfect song like a guy who's like his body's destroyed it's like you keep on us me my wife says excuse me how nice oh what a great song this is boy you pulled out a quick game me me up perfect for a gezer quarterback that's getting [ __ ] hurt good catch on the song Let me just hear just the song those uh let go the ball and plays it are [Applause] stupid you think football players watch this go like the way we watch standup in movies probably like that's not the way it is I mean that's just everything mov [ __ ] up everything movies [ __ ] up everything there's no way they get it right they like every boxing movie every every time place pool in a movie he hated Whiplash that movie Whiplash was so [ __ ] sick it was such a good movie but she was like he's a jazz musician it goes there's no Jazz competitions and he just couldn't get over that oh yeah I get it
the same way we couldn't get over uh [ __ ] lockers and punch line kumes in kickboxer the Kum with John Claude vanam yeah that's right oh yeah and you're like no we don't do that is that blood sport [ __ ] yeah Blood Sport you're right you're right right that's how I am with football movies it just ruins I get it there's like a giant hit on every play like that would be the biggest hit of the entire season season remember the movie Warrior the movie Warrior the fight with one hand type behind your back actually no no no no that's red belt oh warriors with uh Warrior yeah yeah Tom Hardy yeah the movie Warrior they fight two days in a row I go this is [ __ ] I was in the movie theater I was like you can't this is you're killing me these guys would be swollen up their faces would look like watermelons like they'd be so busted up you're they're fine the next day there's not a [ __ ] chance you're fighting two days in a row yeah but look at those hot guys he's good too many guys are getting flatlined and you're [ __ ] getting elbowed in the face that guy on the right that's his brother they fight the brother he's a hot guy they both hot couple of hunks wasn't the worst movie but the suspension of disbelief that's required I don't know how to open up my throat but this guy just sips it for a while you don't know how to open up your throat cuz you poisoned it with whippets finish it it's done Norman I'm enjoying the show you're so sad like my dad the bathroom again sound some of these bottles yeah I think they do that with the military too they have all these um fake things side by sides of like real that's my favorite partus there's like a movie there's a movie where it's like everybody's [ __ ] Hispanic and black and lady and then like here's the squad it was based off of its five chubby dudes with beards that TR killer G stand just right exactly they have the woman General oh man they [ __ ] that up woman General God they [ __ ] that up they love doing that they love doing that movies yeah the woman like a [ __ ] Diner shitty diner for hot dogs and we walked by a lifetime original like billboard and it was two female cops with a with like with the guns out with like a male cop Sergeant
behind them and Rogan goes lifetime is sci-fi for [Music] women sence total fiction that's a bit that's what it's what if we were the ones who were like [ __ ] we're Charlie Angels they always are like men of the work we toxic but then they just do it in the movie do we're going do karate that was a karate and like and we'll pay our own bills and the big guy tried to beat me up and I was like no way there's nothing funny than karate with pumps on it's hard enough to do karate Barefoot you're wearing pumps and then the movie bombs but then 50 Shades of Gray is like besteller isn't that crazy the 50 Shades of Gray thing is so nuts they love it my buddy said that he was like on dating apps or dating girls at the time he's like dude girls want me to spit in their mouth now like out of nowhere who said that I like what I'll tell you later he you know he was realizing like what was happening because of 50 Shades of Gray that women were like into like getting choked and spit on and stuff oh yeah and and he was like out of nowhere he goes like it's like the movie changed changed thees definitely that's how the the billionaire who's like a bad boy but you get to you domate him yeah it's never a poor guy mcus got to be a millionaire mccusker had a funny joke about that he was like he was a [ __ ] plumber everybody be like God damn that guy's a rapist that's what I'm saying some guy in a trailer that was like I'm going to beat the hell out of you yeah it's never a janitor but the the guy with the [ __ ] private jet I'm good good choice good choice J you're coming up soon JL you're up he can take him down like disappointed you guys don't want to do Co punch and the it was part of the plan last night I know but I put my hand in that last time and it sucks that's the whole point it hurts sucks I've never done one I've never done a cold punch in my life Ain fun let me black out [ __ ] go let my body go numb yeah there you go it'll wake you up too if you're in a blackout and you cold punch you'll be up and at [Music]
them that's West Point baby hey not to bring this down but I was reading this article [Music] I was reading this article today about a slaughter house that got fined for having too many children working there now we're talking children slaugh and so then I I I read this researching this slaughterhouse has like one of the worst safety records in the entire country this this slaughterhouse they've had decapitations there like a bunch of people have died but like better child capitated more than 100 children have been discovered to be illegally employed by a slaughterhouse cleaning firm across the country Federal authorities and the Department of Labor announced that a federal investigation found Wisconsin based Packers Sanitation Services employed at least 102 children now who are these hero kids that are like I'll do this at 13 clean kids are animals ranging from 1 years old get a job to work overnight shifts at 13 facilities you imagine being 13 and you're cleaning saws these are good kids bone saws and brisket saws and head Splitters it's how we're going to beat Russia right send over these [ __ ] 13year olds look at this a 14-year-old child worked uh at a Nebraska facility from 11:00 p.m. to 5:00 a.m. 5 to 6 days a week good kids from December 2021 to April 2022 clean machines used to cut meat wow at one point the child fell asleep in class and also misclass after suffering injuries as a result of chemical burns several other children were also reported have suffered from chemical burns holy [ __ ] man good for them yeah tough kid 1.5 million in civil penalties funny if there's different guests on here right now they they give us a lot more weight look at this though look at this go go go back up Scroll look at this the Department of Labor assessed them $15,000 for each minor AED employee that's it $115,000 a year so according the news released PSI had paid 1.5 million civil money penalties I think that the Palestine thing I think they sent like 25 Grand or like here you go wait do you know what 1.5 million is it means 20 cases of it they've only been fined 20 times how do you like that good math yeah once you put the dollar sign I can do the math there
you you're Jameson you're that guy man you're that guy who wants everybody to be as [ __ ] up as you looking at people come on come on come on come on get in there I'm sober as a bird come here this actually go Birds this is the most sober I've been one of these there you go J Mo I mean this guy's a beast this might be a sloppy like you're going to be talking camera's going to be on me be a it's a mess Jamie's over there spinning dizzy hell yeah we doing the gravity bom my butt and so doing the gravity B the very end we're going to be done stupid it's like Gomez it's like it's done just go PE can't the show don't bring gra barely stand up see him standing up with his little pigeon toad all [ __ ] his giant balls and dick together between his legs God damn you see you've SE a wild package giant hog talking about how nice your dick is dude hug giant H big I wouldn't say it's nice that thing it looked like a Wizard's wand it's all crooked got Tree Park knots in it it's got knots God damn there's a little gnome in there a Wizard's wand that thing was [ __ ] up I saw it like two hours ago yeah yeah he'll show it to you any time you want it's a real he used to pull out on stage I I would yeah if if I had a d dude I got a little [ __ ] nub sticking out same not showing anyone that thing especially high pressure situations y the worst I had a girl one time or an old lady I [ __ ] and she was like I was taking my belt off she goes you better not have a small dick and I'm like Jesus bro where do we go from here I mean I got what I got old ladies are nice to have sex with oh she was a squirter e e yeah old lady who's in continent old lady squirter terrible and prune juice coming at me every asparagus she's ever eaten in her life isn't that P I felt like I was on duty she's like I have eight kids four grandkids you got you got four Grands [ __ ] she was Puerto Rican was like 19 who was this lady dude some G I met back in the the old days she had grandchildren you missed it already she said she had grandchildren and he has to please her yeah that was wild she said you better not have a small dick and then she pissed all over him I was like
25 I went to work I clocked in I had a hard hat on wow oh my God but I mean my sheets were ruined and I was poor lived IKEA bed how much did she squirt oh my God it was wild we had to sleep in the corner of the bed after cuz it was just so ruined nuts and it was cold in my room I [ __ ] the squirter I pulled the jeans around her ankles and she like no no I got to walk home from here you got to take them all the way off WAOW I like a squirt it's like a it shows you Didu like when they don't tell you even better [ __ ] me like what the [ __ ] when they lie and say this has never happened before yeah nothing better of that rooster tail coming at you how much of it is piss zero 10% zero zero no I think it's a lot I think it's a I think it's I think it's most of it I think everything that's not piss is just residue either way I'll take it Tri goes you ever been pissed on by a man she's like no to some girl in the Crowd Goes you ever shower with a man then you've been pissed on oh that's funny I'm a big shower whiz guy shower Wiz yeah I think everybody is yeah who doesn't p in the shower wrong it's just a for yeah it happens every single time you think women do it 100% let run down their legs like AUD they get the PE standing up for the first time why wouldn't they they're showering water's flowing you got to pee let it go it's pretty hot just water it's pretty hot I like to think about it yeah my uh my ex loved a shower [ __ ] really which I didn't love it's it's uncomfortable it's not the right positions waterers a little causes chafing it gets rid of jues you need love a good juice love a juice you're going to need some juices down there the juice is loose people practice [ __ ] everywhere try it everywhere I [ __ ] in the ocean once it was salt water gets in ladies [ __ ] [ __ ] salt water beach good movie your dick hole bad we thought we were slick it was very obvious yeah done being a lady just out there like you try to have a conversation you try to like fake it we're not [ __ ] here look at the Sun it's so beautiful obviously so glad we're here how about that Fouch you got to fake it yeah it's not good you ever seen Gavin's video a long time ago about how to pee in public rale no and he was
like it was like showing you how to pee in public it was so funny and he's like you got to pretend like you're like new I sell at 45 and his Dick's out he's like you don't sell at 50 you sell at 45 and he's just pissing there all these different way yeah newspaper rolled up I thought it was a newspaper yeah new rolled up through through the newspaper yeah great diversions that was a funny video there's some many you guys piss in the streets and cities go you I got to find a place to piss I think I pissed last night in the city where'd you go just wherever so many New York you got to find a PL where it's like no one's on the street no one's behind me I got like once you commit you're like look I'm peeing you can't pinch it somebody finds you like sorry I'm pissing in public yeah like they're going to look down on me I'm mean bourbon you know that in some places if you get caught pissing in public if you're like close to a school they they say you're a sex offender and they can write you up as someone who's exposing them heard I know a guy I know a guy who got in trouble because he went outside of a pool hall to take a piss and it was like really close to a school I'll tell you what got ared was a sex offender if I was a sex offender I'd be like I was taking a piss I was just pissing well I think he actually was just taking a piss though you had your dick out you sure just taking a piss EXA if I was a sex offender I'd go I was taking a pissed these [ __ ] I feel like if that's something you do you do more than playground I wasn't doing that when you're 34 just decide to go show everybody your dick got in trouble [ __ ] in a car got interesting wording okay uh someone commits disorderly conduct when he or she exposes his anus or genitals in a public place and I exposed my anus Reckless about whether another person may be present who will be offended or alarmed by his act I knew you would be alarmed or offend notice how they say his act they say genitals but they don't say vagina or an [ __ ] of a girl yeah their act his act yeah they know what they're doing interesting also they know no one's going to be offended by a nice fat [ __ ] at the playground nice P fat
[ __ ] pissing all over the place pissing disgusting [ __ ] while I was a child puss squirting on a seesaw oh that's hot dude it was so great [ __ ] Weinstein talking to everybody about [ __ ] science [ __ ] and then Shane and me and E and Tony are just setting each other disgusting pictures over I was so jealous I was like I want to be over there oh so funny when M sat down Flor he doesn't know how to hang when he sat down on the floor like a mermaid I was like I was drinking I was like God damn the thing about Comics is like once if something is funny we're going to concentrate on that and like he kept trying to like bring up this point and like no no no I can't forget about the fact the way you're sitting you can see trying to focus on him but he's like looking at us laughing he's like I want to be there couldn't get in front it the mermaid sculpture in Denmark you think it's the same what I know it's the same cop once I went to piss and I came back and he was still doing it I was like you got to let it go like these guys are not listening anymore Adam went to take a piss and yep there he that's exactly the that is exactly the pose he was there that's him but fatter and jeer he doing that and I was sitting there it's fun getting smart guys drunk really smart guys they get drunk right he's having fun have a good time he having fun he went off he had a great time sequence is not what it's cracked up to be collider laughing hard Flor he was having fun those guys never let loose on that level never I'm do stand up tonight oh I forgot it's going to be fun that's going to be fun Mark do one more bong and then last night was amazing last night was hold on let me get this whiskey down first so exciting last time was [ __ ] sick yeah it's ridiculous you miss the ending probably better you left it got you sto doing the you stopped doing the [ __ ] q& a yeah I liked those I do those sometimes like I still do them sometimes I love but that was a long ass show the time I got on show was on the stage I was five wild you let an hour and a half go like full show go before you get on I've done two hours before I don't go on stage until two hours into the show yikes yeah but we're just trying to do something out
here trying to have some fun that favorite part of your show though cuz you do the whole show and there's a bunch of people that are there to see you that are like this Joe Rog then you'd be like all right you have any questions they'd be like yeah You' be like shut up dumbass dude you'd see a dude's life just get destroyed oh yeah Joe did this on when we were touring before there was any internet Clips or anything like that he would set up two mics on the on the aisles said come and ask me a question never recorded and it was like good question good question and then he would do exactly that you suck [ __ ] someone [ __ ] your wife like no well it's when guys get aggressive yeah some guys they get aggressive like what are you doing stupid they trying to show their knowledge of your life you know like you say terries is the best shut up shut up dummy that's not a real question you got it oh look at him did it fast that way [ __ ] still hold although you're still holding it like there's stuff left in there I know that's how he holds it left that you know I saw do that first time Seinfeld when I went to see Seinfeld I was 19 years old I went to see Seinfeld in Boston and uh he did this thing he did his set this is like when Seinfeld wasn't really Seinfeld yet he wasn't like he was just a really known standup comic was it ' 88 yeah somewhere around now actually earlier than that it was because I hadn't done standup yet so it had to be 87 cuz uh yeah it was like I was probably 19 or 20 and uh and I went and he he did stand up and then after he did stand up he he would ask questions and then go in and like it seemed like bits he had like bits on their it was like he was just riffing right and I was like this is amazing this guy's just riffing all these things that people were like bringing them up about subjects and he would I guess that's how he would help it would help him write come up with new subject that with je I was like what have you guys always wanted to know about Jewish people right we used to do that ask a Jew at the store Jew and and then eventually I like okay this is definitely what non-jews don't know about us this is the bits I got to we do
that now I got a question we can do it now we'll do night do what's with the wigs loopholes H it's all loopholes you can't be attracted to another woman's wife another man's wife and hair is something they're attracted to so the Jewish intelligent Jewish women are like what if it's someone else's hair what about tits they cover those up ah [ __ ] uh bummer what about great floppy Jewish tits they're so good floppy Juke Globes are the best Globes big Jewish flops Globes you call them Globes J Globes Jewish do have wonderful tits they do underrated part about Judaism J great tits on J yeah you know what else I like the nose you like that I love the Honker like a big nose on a lady a why do you like a big nose on a lady I don't know something about it I do too I like it character Robert Stam was hot young she was young pull up a young bar pull a young bar [ __ ] scarecrow you're about to see scare are you're reverting to your she had clear skin and a disgusting being is this your bit are you bit Natalie she was thought about she a he this oh she was hot go left one go left one beautiful hot dude shut up shut up makeup that's it you don't think she was hot you're out of your [ __ ] she's crosseyed she's in bread I like that I dated a girl had a wonky eye I was attracted to wonky eyes for years same girl told me leave the uh the [ __ ] white snake tape behind it's hot they look like aliens got J back there she's hot dude King of the W guys you don't think she's hot no she's so what are you guys talking about oh dude you're out you're out your mind well she's like face there like that that's a hot lady no she's hot crazy what about Sarah Jessica Parker close your eyes are unal look at eyes you're out your you keep doing this look at her eyes these are your people why don't you love your people you do this a lot you pretend to she's never been hot you saw her tomorrow at the at the grocery store she was hot she was hot pull up uh Sarah Jessica Parker as a as a youth God I love Sarah Jus par not too young I'm talking like eight eight nine Sarah Jus Parker La story was that was like the first girl I was like obsessed with same
big blond hair you me the same page on this you got that right love that show love sex city Sarah Jess Park is that LA Story well that's not a great photo doesn't matter I liked it fly the Navigator she was just young no but she's jewy young family goes right that's horse face no she was big in the 80s she was a sex look at that with the the when did sheing it's great that's a cool girl that movie I just up came out ' 87 if she was in that damn she was in a movie in ' 87 mhm wow when was la story go with the red pants I mean look that's a hot woman no Zoom it in the face dude she's hot although how old was she in all these seven Let's Chill why don't we find her Sex in the City Sarah Jessica Parker sex in the city was a wild show for ladies right it the first show for ladies that like ladies just go out [ __ ] [ __ ] hammered yeah there's a there's an episode where they [ __ ] a black guy and she's like I don't know this is crazy IDE he's going to steal my purse it was a whole thing what yeah really it was the9 wow that was the '90s right oh yeah hot than katrol I lik the other one who was the uh black one red was crazy Kim catral she was [ __ ] smoking hot when she was young even City she was still pretty [ __ ] hot she was pretty hot then she was older but pretty is that Robert Downey J yeah they dated they were an item look at that he was a fun loving drug addict he love drugs I would have loved to hang out with him then yeah up till about midnight and then I'd be like hey dude you got to take off one two in the morning you'd be with him he love the Coca you'd be with him up until he wanted to go i' be yeah yeah I be like yep I I say yeah what he got arrested at a radio head concert I remember did he really yeah I remember being a kid and seeing that headline being like all right away in chains that dude did real time yeah he did he did real time for drugs yeah HBO real time well that was a good show he had politically correct real time and now is it still real time yeah that's oh sorry okay that's a show right I thought that was the old one you were going coffee yeah ah I didn't know we could do that some warm liquor you want some don't
check your phone you son of an onion why we're on a pod shut up what are you doing come on just looking at my telephone Uncle sending a more [ __ ] stories me tell me about the hookers oh I can't imagine with the jungle hor the hookers when you got to leave so you got to go into like Saigon and like got to go nuts you got a good Vietnam look if that hat was green yeah you could be a soldier Vietnam Guyton bear Jesus barstein be and bears the Jew bear there's a guy fights the UFC Paul Craig is his name his nickname is the Bear Jew is he Jew awes yeah really not a jewi anymore badass submission fighter okay yeah love it where he where he from I knew Scot oh love Scot Scotland holy hell he just lost yeah got knocked out by Johnny Walker face paint he was doing all that yeah yeah he's lost he's won he's Wicked submission artist though like one of the best in the world off his back 63 205 just like me after this weekend a little bit different composition though probably a little different yeah little different you whatever pointed the main you [ __ ] him up in a court of law that's right that's all that matters that's why you guys built that bringing the Barrister we'll see what what about Cal Gans going after old Jonesy yeah that's a crazy fight when is it I love Jones back that's uh March uh weekend of March 3rd and 4th baby last time Jones fought he hasn't fought in three years whoa yeah that's got to be the main story line is like is he going to be fresh enough and he's a heavyweight now he's got those El up to heavyweight so is he going to be able to compete freak he a J Jones is also a freak yeah obviously but who do you got I'll never bet against Jon Jones against feels like he's in his prime G feels like he's in his prime John's probably still in his prime as well tasa fight was I love tuas I do too he's a fun loving guy and he was swinging in that fight he was taking those body kicks the whole time was like sad but he would still [ __ ] that gut would jiggle light johnus 150 I'm
going faor well it's the first time that he's ever fought a heavyweight no no he's not what do you mean it's not true what do you mean he's fought a heavyweight before when Jon Jones yeah he went up to heavyweight one time no no he never G are you thinking light heavyweight he light trust me I'm a professional he was there at all of them yeah he's never fought heavyweight Anderson so went up to light heavyweight for one fight there you go couple fight I heard stip is coming back yeah yeah they're trying to well I think probably what the probably try to do is the winner of Jon Jones and serial gr will fight Steve Bay if that makes sense to me why Steve Bay he doesn't need to do it still I'm worried about that guy he wants do he wants to beat Jones still wants to do it beon he wants to beat Jon Jones yeah why Jones is too technical why would he want that stee is great but well Stipe is also like one of the greatest heavyweights of all time accomplishments his record defended the heavyweight title more than anybody all these Legends heavyweight is the hardest title to defend he lives in Ohio might be Cleveland in the [ __ ] house yeah you know who was the man was [ __ ] Cheeto Vera that guy funny I know oh Cheeto the man we had a good time that dinner was so fun oh yeah for hours to like 3:00 in the morning we went and got dinner after the show and it was us and Cheeto just eating [ __ ] steak Cheeto was saying the funniest he's fun talking about why he trains he's like if I see a beautiful woman I just have to run I get so F wow he's like that's why I'm going to be the best ever like [ __ ] up like yeah definitely he's so disciplined he was awesome that's what I see a beautiful woman I'm like I suck he's like I I see women I want to [ __ ] him I say no no no I got a train good for him damn he's fighting in San Antonio at the end of March really yeah yeah if you guys were in town we should all go weren't they trying to put that in the [ __ ] they were putting Cheeto in wasn't it supposed to be in the Apex or whatever it's called they're like why Cory San Haagen it's a great fight San Haagen is a [ __ ] oh my God it's a great fight it's a great fight those guys are both assassins the top of
the game there you go and their um when's he fighting is it what's the date March 25th you guys want to come back let's [ __ ] go Club will be open s yeah let's get a sprinter van 135 let's [ __ ] go San Hagen's the [ __ ] man sit in the front row some us I need I need cheetah let's [ __ ] [ __ ] man wait where's cheetah from scary Mexico Venezuela Columbia I saw that flag that's Ecuador right oh I'm Roo for him he's the man yeah you root for everybody outside of America you piece of [ __ ] I lived there for [ __ ] six months it's my CL lived I haven't lived there for 46 years dude deserve that bong give me that fa this is for the US how dare you coward there you go God bless I mean I'm definitely cheering for Cheeto not because of his nationality [ __ ] you I hung out with him once it's a great fight technically it's great fight did they the fighters talk about other Fighters like we talk about Comics oh yeah yeah for sure oh yeah you know what else they do they're all very uh to me the the brief understanding I've had is they're very uh they're like no I like him yeah like people you'd think would hate each other they're like no he's a fighter they I respect it and they watch each other yeah they definitely watch each other yeah they you know you can tell the guys who are like real because they'll recognize what a guy's good at not good at and they'll talk about it honestly and then you can tell guys who kind of like a little bit in denial kind of haters you know they're like he ain't [ __ ] he ain't [ __ ] can't say he's not [ __ ] [ __ ] seven straet fights he's not [ __ ] there's a lot of guys that'll they'll they'll do that they'll form that narrative in their head mhm I get him he ain't [ __ ] I'll [ __ ] him up I'll do this you know me is when there's a guy that's like hot and then dudes in the back when they're doing interviews and [ __ ] are like I'll [ __ ] you up mm and the guy who yeah the guy who's famous is just like I know what you're doing right yeah you imagine if that's how it wasn't comedy they used to do this in in uh in the UFC where they interview somebody like what do you think about this fight and they take tell the next person well this guy said this as they're doing their interview
they did it with Anderson Silva I forget who it was he was fighting and he said he said he's going to take you down and punch you in the face till you submit and Anderson Silver is so confident he's just like that's a great tactic I mean you'd win if you do that great Conor Conor was the most vicious people would be like when he was like I'm gonna fight you he's like who the [ __ ] is that guy that was the funniest but he's like I chose you and your wife was like break out the red panties yeah we done it baby we're rich Connor chose us like whoa that's mean yeah he did he did something where he flipped the [ __ ] game on its if choose to fight [ __ ] is that Jeremy stev right here right here the hardest hdden 145 lb the real hardest hit 145 right here this guy tko's people when I knock people out they don't [ __ ] move who the [ __ ] is that guy dude get get break out the red panties he thought he he thought he was going to be so cool St thought he had it I don't know when I take that guy leprechaun oh good one when I take that guys I don't I'm looking around I don't know what anyone else has for me around here I might have to jump up and [ __ ] drag Floyd maywe out bed see what the [ __ ] he's at again he did he can talk listen man yeah he can Nate got him Nate got so funny he thought he was like I'll get over and he got him are you kidding me I don't know the gazelle thing is rough the thing about yeah but the thing about Nate is like you you can't [ __ ] talk with him he'll just [ __ ] talk back you're not going to hurt his feelings doesn't work when he was apologizing to kabib he was like trying to oh it's just business but no Nate versus Conor Conor is doing it obviously Conor's the [ __ ] man but it's like it's a show it's a show he's doing it he knows what he's doing he's promoting the fight he's doing all this Nate's just there like I don't give a [ __ ] when you sign to fight me it's a celebration you ring back home you ring your wife baby we done it we're rich baby color McGregor haters Rich break out the red panties we're rich baby so don't say you would not take take that fight like everyone else here would take the fight against me if it was offer regardless of belts or any of that [ __ ] I'm the money fight in the m m
[ __ ] at all weight div Vision so [ __ ] everybody else up can I can he's right that accent I've made such a big thing of myself that anyone who fights with me is instantly Rich so he said that [ __ ] to Nate he was trying to hit Nate with that and Nate Nate was like no I've been doing this yeah Nate's like I already got my own one-bedroom apartment I'm good n doesn't give a [ __ ] he's like I'm F literally doesn't give a [ __ ] you how in and out I can afford already I have Call of Duty I have a 32 in [ __ ] flen give a [ __ ] I got a refrigerator filled with white claws I'm going to [ __ ] you up I know I say I say it every time I'm at this table my favorite line was this like when they're like how do you think the fight's going to go and Conor's like I probably knock him out in the first round n's just like he better he just like he better is good yeah take a coffee break n and by coffee break I mean bring me my coffee no they want you to give us a quick count to 10 both of you gentlemen if you a good one mind count to 10 he can't n can only count to five 10 count the five Nate will you if you can you can put that coffee count how about and who do you with that coffee so we're going to talk about money and business Connor let me ask you first there's word that you could make $10 million on this thing uh is that accurate on this fight yeah I'm going to Breeze pass the 10 m Mark Breeze pass it how much you going to make is that him a hell of a lot more steaming right how much are you going to make I make a lot lot more than everybody else yeah a lot more than his last one that is he can thank me for that one I've made more millionaires in this game than anybody else uh Nate how much of the of the purse you're going to take home do you owe to Conor McGregor I don't know him anything anything over 40 Grand he owes me cuz that was his last paycheck I wiped my with that money I tipped that money I was going to get it regardless sooner or later it was coming with or without you and then the god came and blessed you with it wow how about that coffee want to get to a net worth of a100 million how close are you steaming right along I'm steaming smoothly on rout smoothly
my contract is a peach so I'm doing very well at the time of this his net worth was like funny what a bunch of dumb questions what are you worth today there's people bued in the desert for less than I know this is the best this is the best interview and Nate hates this Miser talk about fighting your like morning radio he's like I got to do this you know what you you you spend my total net worth in five minutes at Starbucks I'm telling you right now no I'm nowhere now but I I asked the questions and so I want to know but Nate Nate I also like to ask question what are your financial goals how much do how much do you want to be worth Nate what kind of money do you want to make more than everybody what your financial dreams what do you what to you means you've made it a mansion a bizar angle she's money I don't know say it like it is will this the money Channel absolutely did that's the thing though that's funny we're Fighters I get it the main thing to succeed in this game is to either be me or fight me everything else is peanuts so ask Nate that he knows that first yeah I guess mission accomplished then right I wanted to ask you how you guys can make the UFC as big as the NBA or the NFL how how is that possible can it be let me loose let me lose I'm one of them and we'll see you know what I mean because when it all comes down to it it's about survival so this is not this this to me doesn't feel like sport this feels like this feels something more pure and fight two was like if this was war you'd be put us on this station and talk stocks and and numbers and all of this um and we can continue to rise but the these these other franchises are sports this this it's kind of funny every time I get [ __ ] up I watch this interview it's the business of War it's like a nightly tradition Nate yeah how do you think this you can get the UFC or the n fell or should it even try I don't even know I don't even next question what a dumb it's like I don't own the UFC you dumb ID got two more he's just like I'm a fighter numbers with you all day lady send me a picture I see what you look like no no no okay no you don't want to see the
picture uh two more questions uh this this isn't the matchup so they're not even seeing this lady while they're doing now the face off was interesting today he lost his mic how do you bring the took it off oh he's out sorry one more time all right he's done uh Nate uh Nate's left Connor it's just you so I'm gonna ask you a couple questions this isn't the this isn't the match damn that's cooler fight someone else yeah the are you able to build enough anticipation to get you all you got to do is check the damn man that's the cooler way to leave Nate didn't give a [ __ ] about that but who won the best part is him winning [ __ ] him up and then when and I said Nate Diaz you shook up the world I'm not surprised [ __ ] surprise [ __ ] two and0 those fights was it it was three to one right no no it was it's one to one technically oh what do you mean technically very technically uh that second fight i' I've rewatched it as a Nate fan yeah round by round round by round Conor won round by con got Sav by the Bell twice Saved by the Bell twice and Nate dominated two rounds it was like he won the fight also yeah really yeah the scoring system's [ __ ] up but scoring system sucks oh really it's terrible how about that volovski yeah the scoring system really is designed for boxing we we adopted boxing's 10-point system [ __ ] there's too many things involved like when when you have boxing 10-point must system works because it's like two guys they both are punching each other so what should it be it should be a more complex system that takes into account kicks punches submission attempts and I don't think it should be limited to like a 10 n thing I think that's a silly way of doing it I think if if someone tried to invent a 10-point must system today for MMA people would think it's too limited yeah from scratch they no way you would want to have a completely different scoring system oh I don't want to cut you off because you're an expert and I'm drunk uh I felt like the vulcanos is on fight Yeah by UFC Rules is on won that fight it depends on the second round the second round uh I gave a slight Edge to volkanovski in the second round the problem ised so the second round if you do the second round one person scored 10 the other person
scored nine but then you look at the first round well the first round Islam had its back how could that be a 10- n r because he he he really got a dominant position and he held it for a significant portion of the round that's more significant than whatever the [ __ ] happened in the second round cuz the second round was 109 as well that's why the 10-point must rounds like who's up you're like oh well one guy's clearly up it's not tied yeah but it's not the same amount of Victory like like look at Islam in the fourth round had Alex's back the whole time look at Alex in the fifth round gets Islam on the ground pounding on him in the last minute of the fight the most significant moment of the fight total how is that 10- n and then the second round is also 10 they should do it more often super dominant right they don't do it enough but volkanovski dropped him in the second round but then Islam got a taked down but didn't do anything with it and then volkanovski got back up and then volkanovski got rocked with a punch by Islam so there was a lot of back and forth I gave a slight edge of the second round to volkanovski but that is the decide of the fight I watched it three times this multiple a real score I need a real score I've gone over with a fine Toth comb the real problem is the scoring system it's not adequate because if you have again if you have a 109 round like the final round where volkanovski clearly WS won and then you have a 10-9 round like the second round how how is though how are they both 10 n rounds yeah that doesn't make any sense one of them is clearly a lot more dominant in one way and the other one is like you anybody could decide like if you're an Islam fan you can say I think he did enough he got the Tak down he landed that one good punch and landed some other good shots you could make an argument but you can't make an argument for the fifth round the fifth round was clearly volkanovski so how are they both 109 doesn't make any sense while I was watching it I knew a takedown is so important so and and he got them he got the takedowns and it was like all right well then going to win the do any damage he's just holding him striking it's not everything it's like take down means oh [ __ ] you're about to [ __ ] me up but if he doesn't then it's
like well that didn't mean that there's also a thing where like Islam had volkanovski's back and volkanovski just punched him in the face over and over y like get us up that is kind of crazy because like the guy does have control of you but he's not doing anything good with yeah so like how much of that is counts towards the round how much of these how much of these dagani wrestlers just [ __ ] up the UFC it's crazy crazy how many good good ones there are yeah but I mean just like as far as like viewership you just got some guys coming in that are nasty wrestlers that's why like a yeah but people went to see that fight that was a big fight that was a very popular first of all you got the top 155 pounder and the top 145 pounder in their Prime two of the top guys pound pound for pound fighting for the number one pound-for-pound status H his own and he was on a home turf yeah so that that adds to it yeah ISL Islam went to Australia there's also an accusation of someone using an IV that they said Islam rehydrated with an IV but in round what's wrong with that yeah it's illegal you know during the fight no no no no oh before the fight after the weigh say he cut so much he cut so much weight to make one no you're not allowed to use an IV what yeah it's ilal it's part of usada because you could ask peeds with an IV so like if you take certain peeds you can flush your system out with an IV and then take a piss test and it won't show up love it yeah damn so it's illegal but I don't know whether or not he actually they say that they caught him they say they know but I haven't seen anything yet so until then I don't know I will say as a UFC fan I feel like more fights are getting questionable that was a questionable one it's annoying the and uh yeah the Patty piml one I thought Jared Gordon won that fight Patty that one was crazy it's annoying when you think somebody won and then they're like no somebody else you're like this is stupid nobody thought other than Patty's family nobody thought he won that fight that was that was one of those ones I like man that's hard to call for Pat British there were two in that card or Scottish yeah British Liverpool yeah Liverpool fun dude great guy fun guy yeah but you know he's a lot of fun and he's like a wild crazy character and he dances and [ __ ]
and gets in there and gets everybody rooting for him who's that [ __ ] uh who's that black dude that dances on the way in which one uh small guy that should not be a heavyweight that is oh Chris Chris Barett Chris Barnett he's amazing F [ __ ] oh yeah the flip is that him wow guy they had Black History Month UFC clip show it was all like you know the black guy is going to win and him getting dominated round one and then yeah and then just wh dude well he's like a 59 heavyweight really and he throws wheel kicks he looks like Marshall guy oh my God he looks like a mer yeah looks exactly like Lam mer he's from Spain no he's born there he was born in Spain oh okay that's I can do that are you sure that's not the fla he's having fun toight that was the one I was with you at yeah if guys can that if they could walk out like that and have fun yeah it's like that just the just the looseness that comes with that look at him SC oh that guy yeah yeah he's good anyway fun stuff what's what's a better combo than tuivasa and vulcanos being pals are they buddies that's a good [ __ ] crew they do [ __ ] shoes together the coolest crew possible they're Australian fighters they're the a that's the sickest crew Vulcan is funny too he's good on pods and Australians and I was amazed at his performance I was amazed yeah good fighter I mean I they L you into those Jes that's so nasty that guy gives him his shoe look at his face like spit it no that's gay covers it up throw up dude throw when when I was in uh I was in Australia I was on stage they were like do a shoey I was like I'm not doing a [ __ ] chewy whole crowd ruined the show they were like B really ruin show it [ __ ] me up did you do it really no I didn't do it I I started to talk [ __ ] I was like I'm from America you think I'm going to [ __ ] listen to you [ __ ] losers he had no choice he had think I would have get peer pressured by a bunch of [ __ ] non-americans [Music] like you go back into material after that or yeah I tried that guy that was the end of the show no way as soon as they hit me with
the do a shy and I said I'm not doing a [ __ ] shy whole audience booze I was like I'm from America dude you think I'm going to listen to you [ __ ] losers start doing oh my God that's like America [ __ ] how nice was that against [ __ ] at that weigh-in it was so nice it's funny that date says I don't sound like that I don't sound like that well I don't want to bring that up oh yeah let's not go there we out of dinner he was like just so you know I don't sound like that I was like oh yeah for sure for sure yeah damn oh when he came to skankfest skank came to skankfest in skank Fest Nate Nate was at skankfest what I invited Nate skankfest he was in Vegas I was like come to skankfest wow he gets there him and his Bros who I'm friends with all of them they're great and they're the most unassuming group of dudes of all time really none of them are [ __ ] like jacked but they're all they would kill everybody sure they're all just like Gremlins yeah it's literally like eight Gremlins come in but they got there when they're doing the [ __ ] naked just in time for me to be like all right come in come hang out they get in there's just a [ __ ] naked [ __ ] dude oh no they walked in yeah this is [ __ ] gay and I was like I get a pissed yeah I think it's gay yes Tech we still haven't paid went back to the Green Room till the death how have you held it in so long that's a problem I was a bed wet went back to the green room while we're in the green room just a [ __ ] naked dude walked in oh they they didn't even talk to each other they all got up and left we just got to go they like this is gay [ __ ] we're not [ __ ] with this comedy you're like it's not that funny then I looked like a [ __ ] loser I was like I saw you all walking out with them I was like yeah I'm leaving like where you guys going you're like I got to go like this is gay I'm not doing this that's some I was like come check it out that sucks they came on that night cuz that can be fun is awesome cuz SK Fest is great just not naked rast is [ __ ] gross I love first year of Brooklyn naked r Ed what the [ __ ] I'm an edge Lord You're an edge guy I'm an edge Lord you're not worried about comedy you're more about like wouldn't it be funny if our butt
and dick was out correct I'm the Lord of that sorry that was me do I take it back I apologize dude dicks are funny obviously dicks are hilarious dicks are funny and roasts are funny so it's fun to get the most I go to anytime there's a naked roast I'm like oh I'm going I would sit front row in Brooklyn in Brooklyn skank Fest it was like the one where I saw the transom t her dick where it just looked like a woman and then in the middle of a first joke just pop the dick out and it's like that's comedy or CL taking her [ __ ] notes out of her [ __ ] who Alis CL wow really she was like H and she reached in she pulled a baggie out and it had her [ __ ] jokes in there that's a hell of a Gallagher a lady that's disgusting yeah damn baggy out of the clam yeah bagir naked roast CH took her [ __ ] jokes out of her [ __ ] oh out of a bagg open he looks so much like the one suck at cavity search at the airport like wait a minute that's a commit jokes just smuggling wor worse than uh heroin that's not the first time she stuffed anything up there to hide it either oh no that's not a thing you come up with on the Fly that's a female privilege be nice to be able to I tried it doesn't work you tried to save something in your butt once yeah it just keeps coming out no your butt will swallow it hemorrhoids you ever use one of those [ __ ] uh preparation thingsit by the way those suppositories I'll be honest they feel pretty good youever do those right to the GL your butt just I got it from here dude yeah it knows what to do so nice yeah yeah suppositories work you're sad you got a hemorrhoid you're like God this is disgusting and then you put it in there you're like golly that was actually DEC you get anal what is this Calgary uh trampede shirt you have on trampede rules what is it you gay this is going to be [ __ ] Shir it was Stampede it's like this rodeo and Calgary I went with Bert and O'Neal once and uh it's a girl Stampede and but some chick it was it's just like an ICP thing yeah it's that some chick blowing like seven dudes in a [ __ ] yeah in a in a in like a a garage what thought going to be what are you talking about
trampede from at Stampede what is it Stampede is all the [ __ ] cattle wrestling come together yeah threesome caught on camera Calgary Stampede this might be trampede or it might just be a normal so at the Calgary Stampede girls go this chick went [ __ ] wild wait was she the Senator's daughter I don't think there's a whole thing about a politician's daughter at this you got put tramped in America I did it's not giv tramped is not coming so so trampede was the was the masc out of stampede for a while oh okay pull and she just [ __ ] dudes like ICP level at at the [ __ ] in the parking lot so it's a girl who goes to the Calgary Stampede and just [ __ ] everybody there are more birs n months after Stampede than any other time in Calgary I think there's a lady who's a politician's daughter and it was a whole thing in Calgary yeah I was just there and they were like talk about this the place nuts me Bert O'Neal Edgar and Kathleen McGee went for Stampede it was such trash I threw up on a child trying to keep UPN Jameson what an idiot I barfed on a kid blackout I just heard it got on him and I'm like God damn I had to [ __ ] sleep it off in the bathroom girl wow from that video and that picture that girl is a beast I think that's her no regrets yeah she went viral yeah start doing porn a winner she started doing porn she might start doing por sucking cucumbers and [ __ ] two dudes in a parking wow congratulations I guess it is hard for women you know it's a hard industry for women to break into all you got to do is suck a cucumber and [ __ ] two guys in a parking CR yeah yeah anyway problem is you can't get out of it that's a tough one everyone's going to remember that one yeah yeah everyone but they she they celebrated her no one cares about theed I don't know how she's a porn now get her back on Twitter yeah what's going on Elon El czy thing do something man free trampede she might have went off she might have gone queing on yeah she might went Pizza gate I'll be honest if you're sucking dick in a [ __ ] parking garage in Canada next thing you know you're like there's a basement there I know a goddamn basement there is pretty flat there is a basement
there why were they posting all that on was fake wonder what you guys suspended for yeah M it's a wild lady I'd like to read her tweets I love how you call up youan and be like can you tell me exactly what you spend it for go here's the deal I probably could wouldn't want to waste his time though you don't get too many of those text messages returned yeah you got to be careful that's funny that that's yours like I got a bunch of dudes that I'm like I'm not going to text them I don't want to waste this test was yours is Elon it's funny sers was like when the guy [ __ ] was the coordinator at the at the uh oh that's his close friend though yeah and he goes can you get me one of those throwback jerseys he's like dude I'm fighing Runing a playoff game right now I got wor Run game one of the soback jerseys when you think about Elon though these guys running three different companies simultaneously I don't even understand it I don't know how it's possible to run Tesla Twitter SpaceX boring system I don't understand I don't understand about and he still responds to tweets and he's having 19 kids at least 19 he busy shooting them right now shooting load right now Lo no no pressure not take away his money him and Nick Cannon Falcon X saving the population how many kids does Nick Cannon have I think he's up to 12 most got the apostles that is so crazy and uh step program you know what's funny you better keep working you better keep working cuz you got a monthly nut that's tough to [ __ ] cover now Whitey is is real low on the uh baby chart what what is Whitey like we're not having kids anymore yeah now how how hard was it for you cuz a lot of guys [ __ ] up for everybody wh clipped I got clipped you got clipped yeah easy you got clipped yeah AR's never having kids again I think a lot of people the inv vitro thing is they're having them too late they're having it late yeah they like people want their career they want a family they want everything they want the whole deal ex next thing you know they're 40 and they're trying to get pregnant it's hard it's hard it's not the same you thinking about having them yeah I'd like to have a kid when do you
think you would go how old are you now I'm 39 how old's the message 31 she's good she's good to go all right she's got three more years before things get dicey really the brat is don't have a scrambled egg oh 48 and Pregnant yeah wow who De Brat De Brat yeah from the back didn't that woman from uh Rocky 4 remember the woman that Sylvester Stallone was dating wow 48 and Pregnant wow that's incredible it's ideal yeah um we'll see how that that lady from uh Rocky 4 the real really tall lady that used to be married yeah that one she got pregnant late really I think she was in her 50s well she had good jeans yes Viking jeans yes that's a Tall Blond [ __ ] that's a tall drink of water but wait a minute how old was was your lady if I if you don't mind me asking she's 54 she had a kid that's insane that's not flavor flaves is it it might might have been flavor Maria Desi wow 54 is nuts man that's a gamble that thing could come out crossey it might yeah look at kid looks fine she looks healthy again all right snap back Strong Jeans this could change the game yeah holy hell yeah but you had them early yeah my wife was in her early 30s when you get into like late like Bridget uh fety my friend she had her kid at like 41 really yeah last last she's the best was it not uh no she kid fine amazing I saw I saw her play to me andar I think oh no [ __ ] I was just like she was like we barely knew each other this was like six seven eight years ago and she was like I met you once at the comedy store right I was like oh yeah but I was so ready to be like gone from society that I was like can I see you again excuse me back to my seat what a [ __ ] dork you were in that that [ __ ] rambling mode you get in Rambling mode Trel if you see somebody brings you B it's like soers you I don't want I don't want to be the part of this right now enjoy Vanishing huh for a few months yeah what are you guys doing but wait did you feel like kids [ __ ] you up no in one way well I mean you got to be present and so practice and changing diapers it makes you think about people other than yourself there good to that it's also it's like it changes everything it's like it makes the world a way better place really yeah it's it's it's way more interesting it's way more fun like their fun is your fun their their their
fun makes you happier than anything you could ever be happy happy about for yourself feel it's just different about Raves mhm everyone's having a good time this place great [ __ ] universe is awesome connect woke up it's kind of sad a little bit sad glow sticks sad way yeah kids is better than Raves his dog see how he loves his dog [ __ ] [ __ ] made out that dog on the last that dog rules Bandit the best fine dude is not fine shut up dude I would put that dog down if dude shut up Bandit rules and you know it stop don't be fake on a podcast black nuts [ __ ] nothing to do they went nuts on you kissing that dog yeah they the black community after what you did the first time and then now this I killed Magic Johnson and then this by the way AIDS got cured oh yeah look it up multiple people have been cured of HIV now oh yeah you know why because once they get the prep where it's not a real thing then they're like as well we had the Cure forever let's just release it Michael Chay had a good joke about that what' he say what is it uh he was like he did our podcast and he was like here's a sketch I couldn't do on SNL and then I think he ended up doing it but it was uh those AIDS commercials and then just a dude being in the middle of it like have you seen those prep AIDS commercials no where they're like oh I have seen they're weird like take if you think you might be getting HIV like two dudes together like fishing or like playing the drums and then he was like the the sketch would be a guy in the middle of it being like but I'm not gay oh this isn't like for gay AIDS right you know just one of these guys in the middle of the commercial being like actually I'm I'm not gay do you have to be gay to get this commercial imagine if you're a straight guy and you got that commercial and people like you're taking jobs away from gay people so this is like a pill that you take to make sure that you don't get AIDS dude uh uh um okay [ __ ] what's his name that sucks to get after a audition he was just like he was like you let HIV positive dudes blow loads in your butt you cannot get it come on who did this tell he's like you just go for it doesn't matter tell that to easy this is before this he was pre
NWA so this is like field NWS it just stops him from getting in there you won't get it wow if you're on prep you're fine so no none of them worry about AIDS anymore no that's what the a stands for yeah what's that we might have to delete that one yeah maybe pull that one out it used to be at one point in time it was like that was a death sentence yeah that's too good that's a rough one J time stamp that one J voice reason time stamp I figure it out even hear itwa the is eight mean easy I'm just saying I'm not making that up the man had HIV yeah remember you used to live stream this podcast [ __ ] chance you were taking every three times a week yeah that's fun though you could live stream back F those were the we still do live stream fight companions there you go we did the fight companion hammered live Eddie Bravo talking about Flat Earth and satellites aren't real that's fun what's that I love Flat Earth we're live right now whoopsies I'm ruined whoopsies my dad was right I'm ruined I can't wait to bring Phil to a [ __ ] theater and talk about sucking his dick dude you got to do that that' be so [ __ ] great that' be so great but the problem is now he's proud of me right right now my family's proud of me which is funny when you walk on stage now they go crazy and so like they've got to accept the fact that it worked out yeah but now my dad's a lot he's very everything he does I copy him so he's very like all right like if there's a he's like I'm GNA bomb like he's that guy oh okay yeah that's where you get people going crazy and he's like what are they going crazy for but then if I'm not there he's like you see my son oh got it that's fun it's very sweet Co my parents won't give it up but sometimes we'll be out to dinner and someone's like hey I'm a fan and they're like oh I guess we got to give it up like we got to like oh okay good for him so your parents still don't give it up to you I don't get a lot of giving it up oh man but they understand you're successful right they like be to successful you think they understand it yeah well The Comedy is such a strange world yeah but I think they they give it like I I met I open for Jerry Seinfeld
so that's something like okay that we heard of worried that it's like temporary maybe like it's not like oh this Mark Norman I don't know I mean it's working out for now but it might go bad that's how we feel yeah exactly how I feel I wake up every day like yeah this is a long life we got we're going to do this forever I mean you're doing whippits at 78 you know what's sadder when people stop doing it yeah it's really when you run into a guy used to do comedy like you don't doore really sad especially if they had at least one good set where like you could have figured out maybe even a special or two and you run into guys and like they you don't do comedy anymore producer now or no I'm just like you remember during the pandemic when you didn't do comedy for months and you're like I guess this is life now you felt I felt empty it felt weird we were all at Central Park Louis showed up with L Sarah it was like it was like we're talking about like comics and he was like I mean we're not we don't do it we're not Comics what are we you emo [ __ ] [ __ ] you're talking about Louis no you Lou well Lou is also an emo that's what you're talking about cuz that's who the we're not even Comics now that's pretty good the we're not even [ __ ] we had nothing then when then the parks opened up then the roofs opened up I was like all right I got a par all you guys had to do is not be in New York I left New York and did stand up no New York was going on in New York that was [ __ ] lame Dude any anytime I went back to New York it was a rooftop or you're out front rooftop or you out [ __ ] covered stand you were doing the street in the stand [ __ ] lady would be walking her dog through you that [ __ ] sucks fit Simmons they cuz they'd walk by through through the crowd fit Simmons would be like just like as soon as anybody comes I'm just going to [ __ ] roast them just a [ __ ] someone walk all you to do is leave this I did the road in June of the co of I did too I did Texas Florida I did hyenas in Fort Worth like early and they there was no distancing I walked in it was a [ __ ] packed full room and even I who deny the [ __ ] Co walk in I was like God damn dude you guys are wild this is scary I did one weekend in Houston in July me and one weekend in Houston and I was
like I can't do this anymore I'm like what if I get somebody sick that's that's all I could think of I'm being selfish somebody with theat grandparent comes out that they live with and you're like a [ __ ] well the problem with me is that I the problem with me is that I did podcasts so like what if I got a guess sick and this is when we were testing every day were testing even back then that was crazy tested every day we tested no one else did that no one did that I took the most precautions when it came to co of anything I've seen yeah I wanted to make sure also we had a nurse on staff theability not they don't have it we I miss her I loved her did everything we needed to do in terms of getting beautiful angel up to shots and gave people B12 shots IV vitamin feeling better than you did before yeah nor came over my I had a podcast studio for like a I just opened it and then Co hit like [ __ ] [ __ ] I know everyone was like Schulz Michelle wol I can't can't Norman came over we did one podcast were you guys nervous being around each other no we wor masks and like ski mask and [ __ ] and we made a joke out of it cuz it was like this doesn't seem real it was funny and I remember we're going this is going to end everyone at each other's throats no more gender politics fighting I thought it was going to save the world going to like cleanse everything hey we all ha other I think I think I think it kind of did no it made everything worse no I think I think that's just gone dude depends on who it is being home in front of your in front of your [ __ ] anger box made everybody way worse if you're still in the culture War culture War get out of it get out of it it's over just go bre yeah some people need it though that's like where they get their identity from Whole personal there's turtles in the day go have a [ __ ] go be funny go do comedy list turtles in the river that's that's the distraction Turtles I saw those Turtles and then immed I was excited I go oh Turtles I like to see turtles and then I saw a tent and I was like oh there's a man dying in the muding it's good it's good we walked here they found an alligator one of the Lakes out here no yeah it's very rare but uh occasionally someone will [ __ ] let a pet loose wow they have alligators in South Texas though yeah how about
have we talked about this on here what that guy who died and his last words were [ __ ] those alligators and he jumped off a dock oh he was drinking in a bar and they were like you can't you can't go in that Lake there's [ __ ] those allig tons of alligators last words were [ __ ] those alligators jump in he got munched got and then we definitely have talked about this on and then a few days later his his friend went out on the lake and killed the alligator where are we here I think in South Texas oh wow [ __ ] that alligator man killed seconds after mocking Gator warning oh my God DN 28-year-old Texas man was attacked and killed by an alligator almost immediately after being warned by a bystander not to swim in the water replying [ __ ] that alligator before jumping in bugs feed reports 11 foot Gator oh that's a big big next thing I know I didn't even know how long it was I saw his body floating face down wait wait wait wait uh I saw his body floating plac down and then he's up there for a couple seconds and then he gets dragged back down and pulled off oh he's just meat he's just meat pretty fun though to be hammered and be like [ __ ] that [ __ ] loser he went for it he went for it he failed but yeah an alligator killed an 85-year-old woman yesterday damn look at him getting [ __ ] he's got the duct tape on the mouth stand behind his back yeah he being let off like terrorist look how the his arm dog survived and she didn't which is pretty crazy wow dog survived dog surv that's always nice that's always the worst part is like uh when I was young we used to go to Hilton Head in South Carolina and it would always be you're walking your dog and the [ __ ] Gator grabs it they love dogs bark at the alligators they don't know so they just bark at it they stay right on the edge and they just like alligator like I'm just coming at you well an all yeah I'm going to eat you it's so many of them too it's so cra they they ate a baby in uh Disney Orlando yeah yeah you got to shoot him in the head it's the only way that's those people like it was some chick at like CBS or something she goes [ __ ] that man who's Baby D and they like that's like a light who said that
somebody from like CBS or somebody high up some chick who was like you know angered and then and then they were like no no no you can't actually or some lawyer and it's like you can't actually root for somebody a baby's death because why they saying [ __ ] the the guy whose baby got killed because he was a man what yeah no was that simple just [ __ ] men yeah really what a nice lady that's like the worst one ever Fu save up your money you go to [ __ ] Disney World with your family and a [ __ ] reptile eats your [ __ ] child it's a dinosaur they come out of the water and eat you and then they go back they're huge that was really her only take was like [ __ ] the guy yeah it was like fine [ __ ] him I don't care the men have done this for Gen centuries oh no I Got Fingered once I'm glad a 2-year-old got eaten by a [ __ ] reptile oh God Jesus Christ some of people's hot takes off of Twitter is [ __ ] am we were talking about at a club as that and they how they were boycotting a club because they booked someone they didn't like you know someone who had like an allegation or something and all these like local Comics are boycotting like [ __ ] this club and then on Tuesday they're like hey so here's our spots for the week we can call in and the club owner was like no you said to [ __ ] boycott bu [ __ ] way it is a business yeah like you just said not the thing about those Comics they always suck they suck always not a talented one amongst them yeah it's never like a high working comic who like I'm out there no one who's got a future no one who's got a great point of view no one whoever respects the art all of them suck they're all just [ __ ] frauds well there's this weird notion of like if you're gone I'll get all the spots that's what it is what it is I don't even I feel like I don't even know if that's it is that I think it's just like I'm trying to be important they're trying to be a part of us big story you get clicks off of person if they couldn't if they had to do it anonymously they wouldn't do it virtue signaling is a lot like the mud go back to the virtue signaling is a lot like name dropping it doesn't work yeah you know you know what I'm saying like it's a it's a thing that people try and
everybody knows what you're doing it's like ew W doesn't work it doesn't work you might get some likes on Twitter cuz people are stupid dummies will like you you'll get a dummy fan base you'll get dummies that'll like what you're saying but everybody else knows what you're doing I stand with Ukraine yeah look at my flag yeah exactly no one knew about new Ukraine you got 10 minutes ago two [ __ ] syringes your profile and then a flag it's just all the same I stand with France I stand with Haiti I stand with Ukraine I stand it's like it's the most OB no hate with the thing under your eye it's just like you guys just being so I see through it yeah how about you help the best one volunteer to girl school dur during Palestine when they got everybody to sing songs come on cut that not that one help Palestine good Palestine talk about this help Palestine come on cut that up free Palestine yeah crazy El what is that you're an El Arabic no you're devil you're the devil freaking Arabic in here dude I I I'll speak a little Arabic if I need to is that what it B is in Arabic devil that's the only one I know what's it kusak what is that [ __ ] your mother whoa you to say like that you that's how they mean it it sounds like a good sandwich America Mark I use a little more Buffalo no I want Mark to do more yeah the leader of the Devils you go not even the devil the leader of crazy am I the leader of the Devils oh yeah according to Shane gills you are there you go um what else is going on guys what's in the news today oh spy balloon [ __ ] spy balloons what do you think those balloons are they're shooting how about that one missile they missed where did that thing go they missed the ball they missed the balloon where' that missile go did they I thought they shot a few down east L yeah they shot a few down but they missed one time and so one missile it's like I don't know where it went I like every spies they like they're spying us but that's not an arrow that's a [ __ ] missile where that $400,000 Tomahawk missile go where' that go [ __ ] it went to a [ __ ] uh inner city school in
Saskatoon Lake hon object with first missile strike went in the lake I guess oh all right how'd your uncle tell everybody exactly where it was and then they couldn't hit a balloon that lady's kill that guy there that job she's so good I like the hot I was watching who's the guy from Fox that just goes there and bothers Peter dooy dude Peter doozy was on the flight to Ukraine or he went he got stuck in Warsaw when Biden went to Ukraine it was just making me laugh knowing that there's just a guy on the plane that's just like Mr President this is what you're doing he's some [ __ ] old guy like get this goddamn [ __ ] off this [ __ ] PL like they just have to bring the douche I I love how CNN went hard at Trump like off like not really the news just ask trying to got your questions and like this be great and then Biden wins and they're like oh you guys can use a Tac this we figured out of just like derailing conversation well B Biden has to deal with one douche he's got Ducey yeah Ducey is non-stop just like what the [ __ ] are you guys doing with trump it was every [ __ ] press conference all of them yeah yeah I love him he was like you're rude fuing next shut up next about remember when you got the lady he was like she was like I didn't expect you to call me I wasn't thinking he's like you never think oh I remember it's crazy to have a guy who does that who's the president yeah crazy that Rand Paul's no joke he keeps going out there b Biden don't talk [ __ ] talk a little [ __ ] talks a lot of [ __ ] yeah really yeah these dudes try to like come at himy like you're going to [ __ ] with me I haven't seen any although he does the thing you know what uh I've noticed Democrats do a lot as they laugh like when someone like bring something up to them they go come on man that's a tag you know how many bodies I have on my account come on yeah there it is that's that's you're full of [ __ ] in a tense gun rights argument dude with a [ __ ] full [ __ ] imagine looking into those vacant eyes he's saying you're full of [ __ ] you're like oh my God you're [ __ ] robot union worker know the comes he's like you're full of [ __ ] like that guy probably [ __ ] everyone in the town after that that guy R he's
probably I got a fight with the president today but Tommy I like how you stood up to that [ __ ] fascist on CNN hell yeah that's a credit that is the hard part is the the right-wing guys are more fun yeah you know what I mean they're fun loving guys got a union guy with stickers on his helmet That's like [ __ ] saying wild [ __ ] and then he argues with the president it's like nice the opposite of that is some [ __ ] like fat lady with a crew cut being like Donald Trump is Hitler you're like I don't want to hang out with that does that seem fun I don't want to hang out with that guy I don't want to hang out with that lady with the knit cap that's screaming you know that one lady with the knit cap screaming all the time classic video the [ __ ] if the dude with the [ __ ] wolf helmet did broke into the January he was at the show be like yo that guy the wolf was at your barbecue what w suit was here yeah he's organic he's organic he trying to be he's [ __ ] for the rest of his life oh yeah go [ __ ] do that he goes down in history like that from Australia with sunglasses he's in jail forever he's in jail forever he's going to be in jail for a long time oh yeah they're going to put him in jail and he's always going to have a record now he's always going to be that guy that did that that broke in the White House that makes sense that he's always going to be that guy that did that but how long is he going to be in jail I don't know it's a good question up the the shaman how long is he in jail for 36 months there he is he's a 40 months 40 months in prison followed by 36 months supervised relas so he's going to do 46 months 41 months in prison another 30 good behavior he'll got out three years not for treason that's pretty good and he must pay $2,000 in restitution back in the day was hanging was hanging oh yeah hang him up what's [ __ ] is like how many of those guys got talked into going into the White House like and how many how many like agents were telling people get in there and take back what's yours Ro what's that guy yeah yeah yeah yeah that guy did anything ever happened with that nothing no said he wasn't in it if I'm trying to hebi all my tell me it's fine
it's fine didn't he not get in trouble didn't he also not even yeah no he didn't get trouble so they were like no he's not one of us but also no charges yeah exactly mean one we got to get in there and everyone was like you're a Fed yeah like there's videos of him the night before being like we got to get into that building and dudes that are like altright dudes are like no you're a [ __ ] fed he's like I'm not a fed come on guys let's break America Alex Jones was out there with bullhorn telling people not to go in really and they hate him he was saying it's a trick it's a trap they're trying to get you to go in there don't do it don't go in there it's it's peculiar I think now that we've had a couple drinks we should discuss it it is peculiar you ever seen is interesting that's all well there's so many instances like the G the Gretchen Whitmer thing where yeah the governor of Michigan all of them 14 people 12 of them were FBI inform two dumb guys yeah tricked two dumb guys who go to jail for 12 FBI informance tricked two dumb can say see our our politicians are under attack we have to do something it's like they never would have done anything yeah you guys literally formed the idea you came up with the idea you instigated it you formed the plan it all out we might have talked about this before uhoh there's two there's a documentary it was on Amazon it was about these dudes in Miami there was like six black dudes that got roped in by an FBI informant that they were like trying to have a construction business and a guy was like he's an FBI informant he gets 100K for everybody he [ __ ] brings in wow he was like What if we uh my uncle's Osama Bin Laden do you want to meet him they're from [ __ ] Dade County they're like yeah I don't yeah sure then he's like all right and they have like hidden cameras and they're interviewing just a dumb dude from Dade County and they're like what do you want to do what's your terrorist play and the guy's like we're going to blow up Chicago that was like his plan yeah I mean yeah the Liberty City 7 wow so they went to jail this is I think they went to [ __ ] Guantanamo i' love to see Shane's Google search when he's like drunk at home alone how did I never heard of this one before this is
preposterous dude whoa vood syncretic view what is a syncretic view they missed Judaism Christianity and a little bit of Islam there was one of them that was like a black Israelite kind of but so they just instigated these guys and talked them into doing things like they and they were like literally they were like we have no idea what this is we're trying to get $100,000 from these dudes crazy how many times people have done this oh there they are yeah they're just regular [ __ ] dudes they talk to say we're going to blow up Chicago yeah they Jesus 162 months in prison [ __ ] did nothing they did nothing wrong 12 months in prison question any of the men have actual years supervised release with any members of al-Qaeda they know of the answer that is no look at look at that that case 162 months in prison followed by 35 years of supervised make sure no more terrorist attacks 35 years it's a check in I'd like to be Laden said hey you want to meet him I go IET him meet would be out by now they all everyone except for him would be they got [ __ ] where's their podast if you watch the video there's like it's they're dumb they just dumb they just got talked into it and also they're just they don't have they don't have sophisticated don't know what's going on don't know they're getting roped into it FBI informant the FBI informant is a [ __ ] idiot he's just a dumb guy that's like I get paid to get people cap how crazy is that that's an incentive program bring incentive fin to be like we stopped the terrorist plot meanwhile it's [ __ ] seven dudes from Miami that are morons what are you talking about look at this question did any of these men have actual contact with any members of al-Qaeda that you know of the answer is no uh question did they have any means to carry out this plot I mean did you find any explosive weapons attorney general you rais a good qu good point we took action when we had enough evidence question was there anything against the Sears Tower other than this one apparent just kind of mention of the Sears Tower it doesn't look like they even took pictures of FBI director of FBI one of the individuals was familiar
with the Sears Tower had worked in Chicago and was familiar with the tower but in terms of plans it was more aspirational than operation you should have heard his plan he was like the sear Tower they're like that's the biggest building in the world he's like exactly oh was it literally was like [ __ ] uh it was like those Kung Fu instructors from the and then we're g to blow up and he like used like cups on the table he was like we're going to blow this part of the city up and then there's going to be a Title Wave it's going to [ __ ] kill everybody and they were like all right we got them look at this a lot of Big Show has been made of the militaristic boots they had it turns out the FBI bought them the boots wow wow it was one of the biggest pieces of evidence the groove might have taken pictures uh of a bunch of Targets in South Florida but the guys couldn't afford their own cameras so the federal government bought them the cameras they could afford their own cameras how they going to blow federal government rented the cars that they needed to get downtown in order to take the pictures in addition the men provided the FBI informant with a list of things they needed in order to blow up these buildings the FBI like can you do anything on your own they like no I don't but in the list they didn't include any explosives or any materials which could be used to make explosives they in Liberty City is joking everyone in Liberty City was joking that the guys were going to kick down the FBI building with their new boots he yeah yay [ __ ] it's pretty sad [ __ ] yeah it is pretty sad can't believe I have to piss again oh yeah I'm still going strong let's get that piss then we'll wrap pissed we should we just wrap it up now it's 6 o' WRA it up get something to eat yeah plugs plugs I haven't pissed that's pretty good Mark man congratulations I got uh the beacon theater March 24th Follow by an entire European tour at the end of April uh Glasgow London Manchester and then all through [ __ ] Romania r.com r.com for all those that right Mark Norman where you at hey hey I'm all over the road I don't know when this comes out but gu Dan soda theater tour announcing this summer going to
Australia UK I'm coming to your town uh we're all over the place Marken comedy.com we might be drunk get Bodega cat Tuesdays with stories damn you got a good website a good website oh you like that all right stinks solid all right but yeah guy soon I'm I'm really running through the mud look at these rooms I'm really kicking my own ass here look at you you're going to the [ __ ] cold places in the winter exactly she's getting hard hard Reps for hard reps bad people dead inside come on out say hello queef it up praise all Shane GS uh Gillian keeves is on Amazon we just got that up that's pretty neat that's fun uh we're going to add some shows your [ __ ] website sucks dude my website does suck comparison to noreth is great that's a good theater I don't know any of thisis yeah check out Toronto going get stabbed oh but uh me big J Nick Mullen and Tim Dylan are doing uh two shows we're doing one in the Giant Center in Hershey PA and then one of them's in South Carolina I forget where it is Greenville Greenville Carolina yeah is it on your website no no but it's coming okay when you going to announce that I don't know I just so Instagram come with a dumb name for it the four bottoms my name my current tour is the uh many people believe the Tony hinch Club is gay tour ah now we're talking yeah might how many changed how many what's the number many people many people yeah like what what it's just percentage many 78 um that's it goodbye everybody don't think we need this episode is brought to you by Igloo coolers guys if you got to throw up in a cooler choose Igloo it's the best coolers to hold in your vomit what about the wi you want to shout out the whippit brand uh if you look at whippits get n2o cream Chargers the best cleanest whippits you can find in the market today it really says whip it on it like they designed for whipits oh wow it calls it Whi it cartridge that's crazy like they're encouraging people to take whipits don't forget your crackers you can't call them that or they W serve you just like no we r.com get genuine crackers you guys bye everybody bye [Music] [Applause] [Music]