I can’t this is an expression that is vilified in our minds beginning at a young age every time a young child announces this decision they are corrected the first adult that hears it asked them whether or not they have even tried generally this confrontation will result in the child giving their task another attempt until their attention span moves on to something else the adult will see this and chuckle to themselves with knowledge that this is just a child who is yet to learn the art of art and virtue of perseverance by the time this child comes of age however they will have been told by adults more times than they could count that there is no such thing as can’t it is interesting then to think about how many adults seem to proclaim this expression in their lives it is because is it because like many things that adults tell children they are simply telling the child a general rule that the child must follow but can be broken once one has grown or is it because these adults are simply repeating what they were told as children without thoroughly examining what the phrase I can’t truly suggests if you confronted an adult that claims they can’t do something with the same question about whether or not they have tried the answer will almost always be yes adults have learned enough to know that is unreasonable to say they can’t until they have at least tried once therefore the real question that we should be asking in responses have you tried everything have you exhausted every possible option scenario combination tool and approach I do not simply refer to the ones that you knew of at the time you decided to undertake your task I mean have you re also researched possibilities that you had known about have you determined whether or not there is another person out there that has performed the exact same task you are attempting or at least something similar have you exhausted this research have you read every book blog journal magazine bathroom stall and website if the answer to any of these questions is no then go back and try because if you don’t because you don’t truly know if you can do something until you’ve tried absolutely everything the fact of the matter is that rarely if ever is the answer to all these questions yes therefore what is it that people actually mean when they say I can’t a more accurate but more verbose way of saying it would be I don’t care about or want enough this task or the resultant benefits of it in order to do all that is necessary to achieve it I was told countless numbers of times by people during my month of marathons that they couldn’t run one marathon let alone 31 straight every now and then when I had time I would discuss what they’d said we would jointly conclude that if something they cared about and depended on them doing so it would be possible the most common example I used was if someone had a gun to your child’s head do you think you could do it then therefore the phrase I can’t denotes a lack of investment as opposed to a lack of potential or ability I do not mean to say that every person I had this conversation with should have had the motivation to run marathons it was something that I decided to do not them I merely wanted to express to them what I am expressing here given the right purpose and enough time you can what happens if someone has said they can’t we have asked them if they’ve done everything and the rare cases happen and they honestly say yes do we concede that then they can’t nope if everything in existence has been attempted enough to determine that it won’t work then congratulations you’ve been awarded the honor of being the person who must invent the method or the tool or determine the right combination whether or not you will once again boils down to how much you care time they end up being that a person ends up trying for their entire life but I suggest removing the phrase I can’t from your lexicon and replacing it with I can’t yet do this so that you don’t risk being on your deathbed saying I didn’t
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